62. Facing The Pain
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Chapter 62: Facing The Pain

 

Klauna woke up to the searing pain in her head. She was having a pretty severe headache.

"Urghh…" Klauna let out a grunt as she clutched her head. 

Her eyes opened to the sight of the afternoon sun. It was cloudy so it wasn't so bright, but the sun was still strong enough to burn through her eyelids. Shifting her body and eyesight to the sides to avoid the sunlight, Klauna could see the sight of her tent, half-destroyed and burnt. 

Bringing her body up, she took a look at the rest of the tent only to see that it was in the same condition. Her clothes and her belongings all burnt to crisps. This included her hidden stash of liquor, all burnt to ashes. Though when she stared through the holes of the tent, she could see the other tents intact and fine. It looked like the fire was put out before it could spread too far— perhaps it rained before it could spread. She did recall such a thing.

Klauna then laid down on the ground lethargically, not wanting to move or think much. The pain throbbing in her head was too much to bear. She just stopped thinking entirely and let her mind wander around. Her body and sight followed suit as her eyes wandered and landed on a specific book— the book laying flat opened on the ground next to Klauna.

The Grimoire of the Analyst.

"Harbin…" seeing the book brought back the memories of yesterday's night to her mind.

That was probably the first time she saw her cry. It was also probably the first time the two had a full-blown argument like that, shouting down at each other's throat. 

Looking around the room one more time, she could confirm that Harbin wasn't around. It was a strange occurrence to Klauna, Harbin would never leave the grimoire around like this. Then again there were a lot of things that Harbin wouldn't do; things that she did in the previous night. The event must have shaken her quite badly. Klauna was like an idol to her. It must have broken her heart so.

Standing up from the floor, Klauna slowly walked over to the book to pick it up. Unfortunately, she tripped over something and soon fell back down, face-first, to the ground. 

Letting out an angry grunt, she looked over to the object that she tripped over, only to find the memento from her dear late friend— The Warrior Spear Indominatus.

Losing the will to get up again, Klauna caressed her cheek that was throbbing in pain from the fall. That and combined with a little bit of bruise from Harbin's beating the day before made it hurt extra.

"It hurts…" Klauna muttered.

It hurts more than usual for Klauna, more than any injuries; not only physically, but mentally as well. It reminded her of that day where her world fell apart. The day where she decided to just stop thinking about things. 

Things were different now. 

Back then, it was easy for her to just forget and ignore things. Such an action didn't matter to her when every person she ever loved was gone. When there was nobody for her to care about, her act of just drinking away the sorrow and dulling her mind was easy.

Nowadays, she found it harder and harder to ignore such things. Even if she could, she had people who were actively trying to stop her from doing so. She has no other choice but to accept the pain into her heart. 

But there was only so much one's heart can take. It hurts to think. But it hurts, even more, knowing that she let Harbin down like that. It hurts to know just how many people had died because of her half-hearted decisions. It hurts to know that she shunned and hurt the people who were actively depending on her. Harbin was one such person who depended on her like that and yet, Klauna decided to abandon her.

Even now, Klauna couldn't take her mind off yesterday's event.

It was frustrating, it was painful, it was pathetic. All because she couldn't handle things that happened thousands of years ago. 

'Thousand of years ago…'

'Shia and Father died a long time ago. My past has nothing to do with Harbin and this situation. Maybe it's time I started moving forward…' Klauna thought to herself.

But what can she do? Klauna was just as clueless as the others on what to do at Divinatus. It's not that she could suddenly find an answer even if she tried, she was not a natural-born genius. This situation was something she was forced into. All she was doing the whole time was faking it till she made it. She needed her men to believe that her plans were foolproof when in reality it's full of holes and weaknesses.

"I want you to live a meaningful life, Ticah," the promise etched into her soul, the promise she made to Shia eight thousand years ago rang out in her mind.

"What do you want me to do, Senior Shia…" Klauna said, gritting her teeth in anger.

Klauna then stared at the grimoire once again. 

"Haven't I've done enough? What more do you want from me? How long must I continue to live this life… why didn't you just let me die that day…" Klauna muttered as she stared at the book.

...

"I don't want them to die…" Klauna said to herself.

It was then that she noticed that the grimoire was actually floating on a small pool of water. 

'A waterproof book?' Klauna asked herself. 

It reminded her of Divinatus. The glorious city used to be waterproof as well. No matter how bad the flood, it will always float and rise to the top. A city built to withstand the effects of very volatile high and low tides. The floating city of Divinatus, the symbol of no matter bad things may be, one can always rise up. Nowadays it could still float, but nothing like the glory days.

Being bored with nothing to do. Klauna picked up the banner and spear, Indominatus to pull the book towards her. It worked for a while until the grimoire reached the end of the pool. Now it's just grounded and stuck as Klauna tried to bring it towards herself. Clicking her tongue in annoyance at the book which refused to come to her, she decided to just push the book away. The grimoire now sliding over the small pool of water to the other side.

"Just like Divinatus… it was always a sight to see that grand city with Senior Shia. When and how did it become that way? Stuck to the coast." Klauna muttered.

It was then that Klauna's eyes shot wide open. Her body sprung upwards as she rushed over to the Grimoire of the Analyst. With her hands, she moved the floating grimoire around the pool of water. Left and right, all over the puddle of water. 

She then started laughing. At first, it was a soft laugh, but she started laughing louder and louder. She laughed till she was out of breath, kneeling downward as she slowly lost energy to her legs.

'Of course… how could I have been so blind? There was still a way out of this,' She thought to herself as she let out a smile.

"Harbin was right…" Klauna said as she let out a small chuckle. "It's not over yet."

Klauna then stood up and picked up Indominatus and the grimoire. She then started drawing on the ground using her bare hands: a map of the area around Divinatus and its waters. Once done, she started to draw a rough draft of a plan, constantly picking up things from the ground to use as markers. She would draw and write something while moving the markers before resetting the whole board and starting over. Draw, erase, draw and erase. 

It was just like how she always does her planning. Although this time, something was different. She found it easy to fully concentrate on the task at hand. It was like her mind was free. Like a big weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

For the first time in a very long time… she started thinking about something. She didn't want the people under her to die. This wasn't the time to wallow in despair. She still has something that she needed to protect. She wasn't about to allow herself to feel that pain again. She didn't want to abandon them like how her father and Shia did to her.

Hours and hours passed until she saw what she would call a perfect plan. At least to her, it was a perfect plan. Klauna then drilled everything in her mind, memorising the whole thing.

Once done, she just let out a relaxed smile before bringing Indominatus in front of her. "I'm sorry for being so unsightly. But… Thanks for staying by my side," Klauna said to the Spear, Indiminatus.

She knows that she was just talking to an object that can't talk back, but she felt like doing so anyways. Once satisfied, Klauna then walked out of her private tent with the two relics in tow. She took two steps away from her tent before taking a deep whiff of the air. The smell of something other than liquor filled her nose.

"Are you… done?" Cera's voice came from behind Klauna.

"Cera?" Klauna asked, surprised about the fact that Cera was standing outside her tent.

Klauna then looked at her private tent from Cera's point of view. She could pretty much see the entirety of the insides from her location.

"Why... are you here, Cera?" Klauna asked.

"I saw Harbin in a very depressing state yesterday. Some mean person made her cry."

It hurt Klauna a little to hear this. It was totally her fault, after all.

"I wanted to teach that person a lesson… knock some sense into the person," Cera added, her hands clenched into a fist.

"I see," Klauna gritted her teeth and stood still in preparation.

"...But I can't seem to find the person. Do you know where she went?" Cera said to her with a smile. She then winked slightly.

Klauna's eyes widened for a while before going back to normal. She then gave back a small laugh in response, replying to Cera with a soft smile. "Don't worry about it. Harbin gave that person a good beating last night. Though if she ever comes back, I'll make sure to give her a good beating as well."

"I see," Cera then let out a small chuckle as well.

The two kept silent for a short while, with Klauna just observing Lionel's 'child'. The person in front of her has grown significantly compared to when she first met Cera.

'Lionel and Liliel would be proud to see what she has become,' Klauna thought to herself.

Klauna then looked upwards towards the skies. The skies were orange and were turning purple. "How… long have you been here?"

"About when you fell and slipped over Indominatus," she replied.

"...so you saw everything…" Klauna then looked to the sides. "Don't tell anyone. It's quite embarrassing."

"Harbin definitely got that from you," Cera whispered to herself before letting out a small sigh. "Don't worry. No one would believe me anyways," Cera gave a normal response.

"I'm not so sure about that," Klauna said before she stared into Cera's eyes; a strong confident one. "Cera. I have a plan. I need you to gather everyone. Every person. Officers and soldiers."

Upon hearing this, Cera stood alert and saluted her. "Right away, Lord Klauna!"

'Lord Klauna…?' Klauna felt something was wrong with the way she addressed her, but decided to just put it to the back of her mind. She then turned around and started moving away.

"Where are you going?" Cera asked.

"To Medica's tent. I need her to help me with something."

Something that Klauna should have done ages ago.

 

 

Thanks for reading! Next chapter will be on the 5th of May.

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