As I got back into my room, I saw the little girl was standing at the side. I do not know if she was instructed to do so by the maids or it was instinctual as a slave. The food I asked the maids to prepare was not touched. So I decided to ask, "Why have you not eaten?"
The girl looked downwards when asked and did not answer, she was clenching her fists. I did not expect my question to be so hard for her to feel intimidated so I said, "Come let's eat." I came near her trying to hold her hand to lead her to sit. As I was about an inch from her hand, she suddenly spoke, "Masters eat first before the slave. Slaves do not have the right to sit down with their masters."
I look at the girl's eyes. It was pitch black, just like the darkness when I was stuck in my consciousness without light. Her eyes did not have any light or even fluctuations as a hint of her emotions. Her face which was now clean was almond shape, her figure looks malnourished, she looked about 6 or 7 years old but I could not tell for sure. Her hair was pure black, it was not silky and smooth even though she was clean, it seems her being malnourished has stinted her growth and the natural luscious hair for children could not be seen.
"I did not want you as a slave," I said to the girl blandly.
When the girl heard what I said, she looked directly at my eyes and teardrops were starting to form in the corner of her eyes. When I saw this I added, "What I meant was, I was not planning to take you in as a slave but I just wanted to help you."
She hesitated for a bit before saying, "Master, you may not know this, but slaves that are sent free does not necessarily get better lives. Slaves will always have that stigma so that they will not be able to integrate into society like a normal person."
"I see." I was not aware of this information. It seems I did not think this through, no wonder mother was so serious earlier. So this was what she meant by responsibility, that I am now responsible for this girl as she is now my slave. I heard the girl sighed when she thought I understand what she meant.
"What is your name?" I asked the girl curiously.
"I have no name master." She said without any emotion.
"Don't you have a name before you were taken as a slave?"
The girl shuddered and she was gripping her hands as if remembering a memory that she has once forgotten. Her breathing became labored. It took a few minutes before she was able to gather herself as she continued to stay silent.
I did not think that my question would have caused her to act this way, I never thought that asking for one's name would be a sensitive topic. It was normal for people to ask for one's name if they are going to introduce and befriend each other.
"I'm sorry if I had reminded you of things." Before I can finish my explanation she suddenly said, "Master should never apologize to a slave, as the master is always right. Your orders will always be my top priority."
"I think that way of thinking is not right in itself." As I said this her eyes opened wide with surprise. Before she could say anything I added. "You see, people have rights, they have their own minds and way of thinking. You might think yourself as a slave right now but you were not a slave before. You had your own life and your own freedom. Tell me, if you think of yourself as a slave, then why did you run away from the slave merchants in the first place?" I asked the young girl seriously.
It took her a while before she answered, "I do not know." She said in a self-depreciating manner.
"So you ran with all your strength without any reason? You ran till you were hurt, bruised and broken, and yet no thoughts crossed your mind?' I asked inquiringly, this time I tried asking in the gentlest way I could.
The tears that she was trying hard not to shed fell like the rain on her cheeks. She then said, "I just wanted to live." While looking at me, she was gripping her hands so tight that her fingernails have scratched her skin that is now seeping with blood.
It might have been a simple idea, the thought of living, she just wanted to survive, however, how many people have taken this for granted as they were given luxurious lives. No suffering as they were fed with silver spoons, they thought it was a privilege. But some people are not even given that privilege, to live, to have freedom.
I held her hand, this time, however, she did not avoid it. "You are safe here, it does not matter who you were in the past if you do not want to say it. What matters is how you are going to live your life now. I will not hinder you as you can do what you want here. If you want a simple and carefree life then so be it. If one day you have become strong enough to want your own freedom and live as not a slave, then I shall release you from your bindings." I said to her while looking at her pitch black eyes that were now starting to have light in them.
"Mother said that people listen to the strong and the weak will have no choice but to follow. However, you can change that. You just have to start with yourself." I then pointed at her heart then smiled. After that, I led her to the table to eat. She did not want to eat at first but her hunger got the better of her, as she started to devour the food in front of her.
