Azrie

This chapter... oh boy... I don't know if I like it or hate it. I felt as if I had stepped on glass quite a lot, I feel frustrated. I... I don't know, humans are complicated... emotions are complicated. It doesn't help that I started at 10pm and finished it at 3am. Well, that's simply being mediocre for you.

Life is a gamble and I took one here by dropping a bombshell. So, let us hope it works out.

Going past the door I don’t know what I was expecting? Some kind of old room, an inhumane torture chamber with medieval tools… I truly don’t know, but I kind of felt slightly insecure about my choices, what if I had to actually do something to her in front of the man to “prove” myself? 

I fearfully peered into what potentially could be one of my greatest regrets — the last thing I wanted was to become one of them — thankfully that didn’t happen. The door led into a small hallway, wooden floors, white walls, and it even had a small skylight. It was a single streak of glass for natural illumination, I guess in a hallway that narrow candles were a fire-hazard. 

I sighed in relief, thankfully the man didn’t notice. He simply kept hold of the girl he called Rie and kept walking, it pained me to see that, but there was only so much I could do before throwing myself under the bus. He opened a door, it was made out of wood and the room inside was illuminated by natural light. I was confused since I was expecting some type of torture chamber, but I was only speaking from seeing the light inside the room from a weird angle and not the room itself.

“There.” He threw her to the ground inside the room and turned to me. “Your ring?”

“Ah… yes…” I clumsily lifted my hand, he saw my other ring and tilted his head but didn’t say anything about it. 

“Alright listen, Collector. You are free to do whatever you want with Rie, I have an important meeting with the town major and other trade house masters. We must discuss the future of Arlesh…” His face turned grim for a bit. “Well, regardless. You are helping me out here, so I will make sure to compensate you.

“Okay…” Wait… am I seriously getting this lucky?! 

“Alright, I will be leaving now.” He said that and simply walked next to me and left through the door we entered through. I guess he really was leaving. I started to hear a slight fabric rustle, but did not mind it.

I sighed in relief and went into the room; closing the door behind me. The room had a small table and some chairs, it was all well furnished and it actually had plants. The building of death actually had plants! ⁠— frankly seeing plants was a kind of relief, I don’t know why. 

“So, what are you going to do to me?” Rie asked with ever-increasing hostility. My eyes widened for a second, she was stark naked ⁠— her tail down, and looking at me with visible hatred ⁠— sitting behind the table. I averted my eyes for a second. She had a bracelet, it was metallic.

I had to keep my composure… After breathing in and out I finally opened my mouth. 

“Nothing.” I shrugged. “There is no such thing as discipline from pain.” She was slightly frozen. 

SMASH!

She hit the table with incredible force. “I don’t believe you!” She screamed. “You are just waiting for me to trust you, like every single one of them! EVERYONE IS THE SAME. I don’t even know why am I telling you this ⁠— you know, I kind of thought you were different ⁠— maybe you are… But, I was simply… jealous…” 

“Jealous?”

“Yes… Jealous… A kin I had just met, seemed in good condition, didn’t seem skeptical about anything… Acting all normal and doing mundane activities without problems ⁠— holding a job and being paid for it… It all sounded too good to be true ⁠— it still sounds too good to be true… One day I am living my life, the next day… I am a slave...” She said as she touched the bracelet.

“I… I⁠— 

“While I know being a Collector is dangerous, I don’t think it’s the same… Haha… funny how I am ranting about it to someone that isn’t even a kin…” Eh? “You don’t smell like either, after all… Just what are you?” She cried in desperation. “Forget it… Probably a race I don’t know...” 

“If that’s what you are so worried about.” I took my cloak off, my ears bounced up and down for a second. She was speechless. “I might not be a kin, you are right — frankly I don’t even know what I am myself, but you know… I still want to live, and do my best at it, even if I might be weak…” 

She sighed and suddenly smiled for a second.

“I guess the gods can smile upon us, at least once... “ After a short pause she stood up and turned her back to me. Just do it… I don’t feel it anymore anyways… And I’d hate to have dragged you into this…” 

“Wha…” Her back was full of horrible line scars, protruding from her skin. “I won’t…” Also, I had no idea what I was supposed to use to “punish” her. 

“Aren’t you mad?” She asked with genuine confusion.

“Mad?” I tilted my head. “Why would I be mad.”

After a second of silence. “Well… I-I… almost ruined your life after all… I tried to remove the little cover you have out of selfishness… because of being jealous.”

I sighed, perhaps life was unfair for everyone ⁠— not just me. We all struggle to survive, it’s not a choice, it’s simply the hand you’ve been dealt with. 

I stood behind her and tapped her shoulder. 

“You know, I understand. Life is unfair… it always is…” I paused. “Which is why I don’t want to make it more miserable for anyone else…” Although, I felt like a hypocrite… 

She turned to look at me, with wide-open eyes. Without thinking twice about it, she lunged herself at me, this time simply… hugging me? 

“You know… even after I got slapped… I still thought it was fun… While it was a beast-like behaviour, basically animalistic… Having no hu⁠— contact with anyone has⁠— I wanted contact...” 

“I know…” I was hugging her as well, it was almost out of instinct. When was the last time I got a hug? I didn’t remember, such a simple question I didn’t have the answer to. 

“Tell me…” She was whispering to me. “What’s your name?” 

“L-Leah… It’s Leah…” I stuttered a bit from the sudden question.

“Leah, eh? It’s pretty cute… Mine is Rin.” Eh… “Although I got renamed to Rie unjustifiably…” 

I didn’t really know what to say. 

“Thank you… Life is unfair as you said, but perhaps it’s not as bad as I thought it was.”

“You know… there is a phrase I like a lot… We cannot change the hand we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” 

“Eh?” She suddenly stopped hugging me and looked at me with confusion. 

“Ah, sorry… I wasn’t hoping you’d understand it…” Realizing there was no such thing as a phrase like that here, I pointed out my mistake.

“The Last Lecture...” 

“Eh?” Did she just… 

“Ah! Forget it, this just makes it even better!” EHHH?! She suddenly glued herself to me. “I don’t know what kind of struggles you had, but… I am thankful, for sparing me… for reminding me…” 

I was aghast as she preciously hugged me with love and affection.

“I…⁠” I was speechless for a few seconds. She stopped hugging me, it was reluctant... 

“Are you mad?” She looked at me straight in the eyes, with a rather sad expression. “Yeah… I know… Perhaps I am the miserable one here… I am just happy you know… to at least know I am not alone in this hell…” She turned away. 

“Rin…”

“What?” I could tell, her mood wasn’t right… “Also, it’s Rie… Rin is long dead…”

“So that’s how it is…” What was this feeling? Of regret — a mistake was made. “Leah is dead as well… and I am standing here! What’s wrong if Rin is dead?” I had to… make up for it…

“I… am sorry…” I felt the need to apologize, I didn’t know the reason. 

“For?” Of course, she asked the dreaded question. 

“I was shocked… I still am…” What was I going to say? I still don’t know… It doesn’t matter anymore. “I am happy that you see me like that… It’s just… I am confused… I am not very good with words, sometimes…” 

She wasn’t really saying anything, just looking at me as she started to dress herself. I had to make a choice. 

“No matter how bad things are, you can always make things worse.” She suddenly quoted. “So, Leah… Don’t make it any worse for me…”

“I⁠— 

She shook her head. “Don’t say anything. There is no point in it… I was wrong, I will never know. In the end maybe I am foolish. Thinking something would change when meeting you… It’s just false hope, a drop of water won’t make any difference in a pond.” 

A drop of water won’t make any difference in a pond. Perhaps she was right… Maybe I am simply just making things worse for her. Being nothing but false hope ⁠— for things to change… And yet all I did was stand there and not even feign a bit of happiness. It was a surprise, and shock, but I wasn’t happy. I am an idiot, aren’t I?

“Goodbye, Leah.” She emotionlessly said as she walked past me. It was wrong… 

“No!” I extended my hand

“What are yo⁠— Eek!” I was grabbing her tail, why? I didn’t know. “Why⁠— it’s not the same!” Even though she was squealing, she didn’t have enough force to resist. 

“Why, are you doing this? I told you we were done!” She screamed as she sat on the ground. 

“I felt the need to.” Nothing more nothing else.

“That’s stupid! Harassment is not justifiable just like that!” 

“No matter how bad things are, you can always make things worse... You know, perhaps you are right. Perhaps I am making your life miserable right now, but I can’t allow it. I cannot allow myself to cause something like that simply because of my sheer stupidity!” 

“Leah…”

“So… Let us live…” Ah… I sad it, a stupid monologue of self-righteousness. 

She averted her gaze and looked at the ground. I had fucked up…

“Promise…” I heard her mutter.

“Eh?” Did I?

Azrie

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I am not very good at writing drama, in spite of trying for around 5 hours at it... I just hope it came out readable, that's my only desire at the moment, there is supposed to be another chapter today. But it's going to be a poll. Why not poll here you ask, I get more views by making it a single chapter... Does it make me trash? Yes it does, but as I've said previously. I feel the need to be as transparent as possible.

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All I can say is that I hope to be forgiven.