(Side S. 2) Failure
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This is not edited at all, sorry! Also, no more earth chapters? Ah... I kind of forgot to look at the poll tee-hee... No, but seriously, this is a dictatorship! No such thing as democracy! Jk... Heart the chapter if you like it.  

Cries. Screams. Sirens. 

 

Crashes. 

 

Screams. Sirens. People running around. Pointing, shouting, crying. Some have robes. Others have helmets. Looks of horror. Running. 

 

Sirens. More Sirens. 

 

Tears streaming down. Fading into the air. Into the ground. 

 

It hurts. It’s warm. I am… bleeding. 

 

The ground clattering. Busy with pacing. Busy with rushing. Sirens. Louder. Help is here. Tears falling; fear increasing. Life disappearing… 

 

Picked up. Help is here. Soothing voices. Warm touch. People look away. They keep walking. Noise fading. Rain is falling. 

 

Everything is okay. 

 

Crashes. Noise. Beeping. Rain. Everything is fading. Darkness... 

 

Help me…

 

Darkness… Eternal. No sight. Nothing to see. Nothing to be. Need… Time… Beeping.

 

Time. More time. How much? I don’t know. Shrouded in darkness. Confined. Helpless.

 

Voices. Beeping. Crying. Shouting. Rain... 

 

… 

* * * 

 

What does it take to be in the 1%? 

 

I always wondered about that. What consists of the 1%? What does it take to be there? Determination? Power… Will… Consistency? No matter how hard I look, no matter where I see, no matter how I observe… It’s not there. 

 

But if it’s not there… Where is it? I want to kn⁠— 

 

BANG! 

 

“Wake up already!” 

“Eh?!?” 

 

Darkness… Sound. Noise. 

 

A sliver of light opened; like a wave, it increased into a seam and into a scan. The door was opened, light entered my room. A girl peeked and smiled. 

 

“Seriously Rin… you are irredeemable.” I guess… “Wake up already, I will be waiting.” 

“Yes…” What was I doing? Ah right. Sleeping. I raised my hands from bed. 

 

Clap, Clap. 

 

The white lights turned on, blinding me like a flashbang. The supernova explosion in my vision was straining, but nothing a few eye rubs wouldn’t solve. After some more, I finally managed to see in my entirely white room. Nothing like being minimalistic. 

 

My blonde hair was obscuring my vision, I guess it was time for a haircut. 

 

Yawn! Ah well… something for later.” I rose up from bed. My back cracked and popped, my neck and feet did so as well. The fluffy carpet was nice on my naked feet, I took the chance to stretch by tensing my muscles and simply moving side to side in an attempt to relax myself. 

 

Crack, pop, crack.

 

I looked at the single mirror on my room, I could see the black sky out the window. The early lights of the neighbors and the occasional bird chirp. It was always like this, wake up early and sleep early. Well, it was a small sacrifice to be made. 

 

I looked at myself in the mirror, I had to look great. Well as great as I could. My blurry vision could not make out any details outside of my hair and a loose shirt. I had forgotten. 

 

With clumsy steps I made my way back to bed and approached my nightstand, reaching for the black rectangle blob. Its legs extended towards my face, I could see the strands of wool on the ground looking through its lenses. 

 

“I guess I should get contacts sometime?” I questioned myself as I put on my glasses and made my way back to the mirror. I could finally clearly see. 

 

“Someday…” My hair was messy, my face was a bit puffy and well defined but my nose was a bit too big. I was pretty ugly all things considered. While I didn’t want to be a super-model. I wished I could be as cute as my sister at least.

 

Puffy cheeks, small button nose, pearl-like eyes. Such a cutie… 

 

I could see the post-its on my mirror. With red marker on them. 

 

Be better. 

                      Try harder.

                                             Success.

 

That’s what I aimed for. With re-instilled inspiration, I made my way to my dresser and started putting my uniform. I had to study hard in order to get better. Sometimes I wondered why I was like this ⁠— I was lazy and yet held myself to high expectations. 

 

Re-adjusting my skirt and my t-shirt I was ready to go. Taking the shoes on my hand and my small backpack with the necessary books. I exited my room with a yawn, I was never used to waking up so early. The sky was barely turning blue, it was still a starry-night sky as far as I was concerned. 

 

I entered the kitchen, there she was. My little sister devouring her cereal as always, she was quite the early bird as opposed to me. But it didn’t matter. 

 

“You’re finally here Rin!” 

“Yeah, yeah. I am awake.” 

 

After I dismissed her I started to put cereal on my bowl and milk. It was nice and crunchy but sometimes it would hurt my palate, so it was better for it to not be that crunchy. I took a seat and started eating. 

 

It was cereal… 

 

“Hey, Rin. Are you nervous?” 

“Hm? Why?” 

 

“Well, it’s today isn’t it?” Eh? “The day you get your results for university.” Right… 

“Yeah… now that you mention it. It is today, yeah…” 

 

How to put it… it wasn’t about being nervous or not. What would happen afterwards? That’s what I wondered but nothing I had an answer for. It was annoying, it was nothing but annoying. I didn’t want to deal with it. I worked so hard for it and yet I didn’t want to deal with it. 

 

Clank

 

I put down the metal spoon on the ceramic bowl. I was done eating, my sister on the other hand… She was going for a second helping, but she was a total glutton so I didn’t particularly find it weird. 

 

“I’ll be leaving Ali.” 

“Hmhm!” Strangely enough, she had a bunch of free time in the morning, I never understood why she always chose to wake up so early to wake me up instead. 

 

Although it had its perks. I no longer needed an alarm clock for one, and while sometimes it would be scary to wake up to her banging it kind of made me happy to be able to see her every time I woke up. We both lived alone in an apartment, it was nice but it was hard. I had to work hard to get here. I found it kind of funny that my parents refused to pay for anything but my education… 

 

◇ ◇ ◇ 

 

“Are you sure you can take Alice with you? You are nothing but a failure after all… What happens when you fail? Do you intend to sink your sister along with yourself?”

“That isn’t the case…” 

 

“Then… Why is it?! WHY CAN’T YOU DO THINGS RIGHT!?” 

“I don’t know...” 

“Of course you don’t! You never know!” 

 

“I⁠— 

“Enough! Take her with you, but… I will be watching. One wrong move and you know what happens...”

“Yes…” 

 

◇ ◇ ◇ 

 

“Sigh… when did things get so complicated?” No, that wasn’t the right question. Things were always complicated no matter what I did. Things were simply like that ⁠— nothing to do about it; powerlessness. 

 

Even though I tried so hard to get somewhere, I mean I was already somewhere for her. I wasn’t a millionaire by any means, but I managed to get a constant stream of passive income… It was all for her… 

 

It was all I could do for Alice. I knew that as soon as I was done, she would be subjected to the same treatment, they always targeted someone. They always needed an excuse ⁠— a reason as to why something didn’t go their way. I was the reason. Which is why I had to work hard. 

 

Bzzzt! 

 

I looked back at my phone to see what it was. 

- Mom: Do you have your results yet?

- Dad: Where are the results? 

 

I sighed. “They even forget time-zones exist.” I held down the power button on my phone. It wasn’t something I wanted to deal with at the moment. “Aah, now that I think about it. It’s the last day as well…” 

 

There were no classes. I had forgotten, simply an award ceremony and some speeches. 

 

* * * 

 

“Ahaha…” A dry laugh escaped my lips. The auditorium was as daunting as ever. A boxy building that stood tall and cast its shadow on anyone that wanted to enter it. With a gulp, I made my way inside. 

 

Right at the entrance, a teacher stood there, she looked at me with utter confusion. 

 

“You forgot?” 

“Yes…” 

 

With a sigh, she took out her phone and started to text someone. A few seconds later another teacher came and took my hand. 

 

“Rin, why are you always so forgetful?” Ah, the classic why are you like this? question…

“I don’t know.” I had no answer for it. 

 

She sighed and continued to escort me backstage. It was already a crowded place, and the crowd was… the parents. Mine didn’t come ⁠— they couldn’t be bothered. They just wanted to know the results of the university application, that I would receive right after the ceremony. 

 

I kind of wondered why it mattered to them so much. I was not good, but I was pretty successful at my age, all things considered. I had basically fixed my life, and yet… it was never enough. 

 

◇ ◇ ◇ 

 

“Eh. You aced the test?” Yes… please say you are happy. “I mean… not bad I suppose…” 

 

No smiles to be seen.

“Oh, you won awards? Then why is it that I didn’t hear until you told me?” 

“Rin, you should try harder. I tried harder than you! You are not good enough.” 

“Yes…” 

 

Why was it? That the harder I tried the colder they became… 

 

“Oh, you saved all the money we gave you and invested it?” 

“Yes…” 

“How stupid… I can see why you are not good enough, now...” 

 

They laughed and yet…

 

“You can provide for Alice and want to take her with you?” 

“Yes…” 

“Are you sure you can take Alice with you?... FailureFailure…”

 

◇ ◇ ◇ 

 

The door opened, the ceremony was starting. 

 

“Oh, it’s Rin!” Some people looked enthusiastic that I was here. 

“Uwa… She is here…” Others not so much. 

 

And yet… Why did it always have to be like this? A girl standing in front of me, she believed she was my rival or something. I didn’t even know her name ⁠— I didn’t care. 

 

“Rin, don’t get so ahead of yourself!”

“Hmhm?” Why was it that I was never left alone.

“Just because you have good grades doesn’t mean you are better than us!” 

“I⁠— 

 

“You’re ugly. Untalented… You always participate in class as if trying to prove a point!” 

“I…” What were they saying? Why today? Why? It was unasked for. 

“Who are you trying to impress?! Do you think we are stupid!?” 

“...” How?

 

“Why is it that you are not responding?” I...

“Rin, I want to like you… but seriously… stop looking down on people.” 

“Yeah!” How did it become like this? 

 

Suddenly almost every single one of my classmates started telling me things ⁠— things that I already knew, and yet didn’t want to hear. I knew I was a good for nothing, but I still tried. How many sleepless nights did I spend? How much I tried to get into a good college? 

 

““Ri⁠— 

Sigh… “You are all right… I try way too hard… I know… I…” Why was I crying? 

 

I interrupted their chant and simply looked at the ground, I didn’t care anymore. I didn’t want to be here anymore. 

 

I just wanted to be good enough. Perhaps being in the 1% was the answer… But I wasn’t good enough for that. I left the ceremony, it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. College? That was a waste for someone of the likes of me. 

 

* * * 

 

I exited the building, nothing really mattered anymore. 

 

BOOOM! 

 

The thunderous sound echoed through the sky, the grim day started to pour on me. It was profusely raining. 

 

Sigh… Today isn’t my day…” I sighed yet again. “College, huh? I will be getting the news either way. I don’t need a stupid ceremony. I need a taxi…” 

 

I pulled out my phone and turned it on. It made a nice ring sound as it started to boot up. Finally the lock screen. 

 

Bzzzt! 

Bzzzt! 

 

“A-ah there it was…” 

 

- Mom: Not good enough to reply, either? 

- Dad: You know you just need to send a text message, right? It’s not that hard. 

 

I started to swipe the annoying messages, I didn’t care. I already had done everything I could for Alice, the apartment was to her name even. The money I worked so hard for was also hers… That’s how much I loved her, she didn’t know. But my diary said it all. 

 

Bzzzt! 

 


“Now what?” 

 

- INDX: Abc. Inc: 3,259.69 USD (+9.59 %)?

 

“Perhaps everything wasn’t so bad…” 

 

Bzzzt! (+5.29 %)?

Bzzzt!  (+3.43 %)?

Bzzzt!  (+15.12 %)?

 

“Look Alice… You won’t have to suffer like me…” I just wanted to see her smile, I didn’t want my parents anywhere near her. And finally… it was possible. 

 

Mist started to build up from the rain, I had to get a taxi as soon as possible. I didn’t want to start shivering in the cold. The sidewalk was getting slippery as well. 

 

SCREECH! 

 

What?! I turned in the direction of the high-pitched grinding sound. Two pairs of lights facing me. 

 

CRASH. 

 

* * * 

 

Crackling. Sirens. 

 

Noise. Screams. Crashes. 

 

Voices. Beeping. Crying. 

Death… 

What does it take to be good enough?

I wish I knew...

 

Sometimes I wonder why I insist in writing things out like this... Full of emotions and internal struggles, sometimes it feels as if I am typing myself into a page even though I try to avoid it... Thanks for reading.  ♥

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Big thanks to FriendlyDragon for um... inspiring the writing style of the chapter!

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