The language is flowery, the descriptions are heavy and feel out of place, the main character calls his sentient AI his "artificial friends" (both plural and insulting), but worst of all is the lack of continuity. There's rough intro chapters that hop between characters and time jump. Every subsequent chapter involves an arbitrary time jump with no real continuity between them. This is all made worse by the regular journal flashbacks that interupt what little continuity the story has.

I think there may be a decent story here but it feels too awkward.

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