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Land of Erden
Land of Erden
6.9k Views 49 Favorites 50 Chapters 0 Chapters/Week 55 Readers
4.6 (7 ratings)
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Synopsis

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/293632/erden--rewrite/
Currently doing a rewrite on this series. Link above.

A fantasy story following the life of the two main characters (as well as other POVs).
It is quite slow-paced as we follow them as they grow, learning about the world and the fantastical elements, as well as the plot that slowly unfolds.
Might be too slow-paced for some people, but does have a relaxing, adventurous vibe, sometimes even kind of slice-of-lifey, even if there are more serious plot elements.

C: [email protected]
Giving a comment, like, rating, or a review would be greatly appreciated.

(The epub has illustrations whoopie!)
Amazon : https://www.royalroad.com/amazon/B08QFQZX6P
Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1059724
Writing a specific story, Land of Erden is my first. Well, writing a story as well as writing in general. I hope you all grow to like it.
Cover is by my sister.

Genre
ActionAdventureComedyFantasy
Tags
Academy Age Progression Character Growth Child Protagonist Curious Protagonist Cute Children Determined Protagonist Dragons Elemental Magic Elves Family Fantasy Creatures Fantasy World Hard-Working Protagonist Magic Medieval Multiple POV Non-linear Storytelling Slow Growth at Start Spirits Sword And Magic Sword Wielder Time Skip Timid Protagonist Weak to Strong
Table of Contents 50
Reviews 1
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    Razmatazz
    Status: chapter 5

    So when I started reading this I was like, what? Wolves? Huh? Tower? What? Who? But then I realised I have the dumb because I started at "Age Eleven - Erden's Tower 4" (The latest chapter as of this post) and not chapter at 1. Derp. So I tried again and did that!

    To to start off I really like the naming convention for chapters in this story. The fact that we follow the protagonist through a varied series of ages so far 10/11 is an interesting idea that offers a lot of potential to see the character grow and it bypasses the boring Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3 system many novels use. I don't know what the 'end goal' is for this story just yet, but it will be interesting to see how the character changes over time not just from his experience but also literally from age and a changing body. For sure it will also be a challenge for the author to write a convincing, consistent character as he spans across the years.

    I had a little trouble following the story at first (chapter 1) and I feel it could be tightened up for sure. There are a lot of name drops in the first chapters and a lot of faces that just suddenly appear. Many of the scene jumps are rather quick and leave an old man like me confused for a moment until I get my bearings again so I would enjoy a smoother transition between time gaps. I would also like to see a lot more of the side characters to help establish them deeper, especially more back and forth conversations between them and the protagonist. There is a huuuuuge exposition dump about mana seeds and the harvest festival in chapter 2 which felt more like I was reading magic-wikipedia than a mother explaining the day's plan to her child. What I will say though is that the author is excellent at the small chapter ending cliff-hangers that make you want to check out the next page!

    All in all I like this story and the concept so far. There is a little polish needed, but there's for sure some good substance here if you are a patient reader.

    Realistically I'd give it a 4.5/5, but in stars I'm setting 5 because 4 seems too low since there is clearly good work and effort at hand here! I will definitely keep reading this.

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