Put bluntly, it's wonderful, there are few stories were the main character is "Evil" yet author doesn't try to convince the readers that the protagonist has the "moral high ground", and for most of those who do try to go that route they have a tendency to overemphasize how much the protagonist does not give a sh*t about what others think of him, and although it may be too early to be sure, so far I have seen none of that in this story.

Spoiler

it also seems to me that the main character is some type of shaman, the idea of which is actually very intriguing to me, I am looking forward to the story maybe going a little more in-depth in to that subject.

another point worth mentioning would be the point of view changed, the way the series of events unfolded along with the way they were described gave it the feel of something out of a horror movie or those old Cassette tapes you would find in the glove box of your dad's truck (or grandfather's depending how young you are)

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well, regardless of weather this review was helpful or not, I can genuinely say that I am looking forward to future chapters of this story.

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Gamph_Madol

Status: ch35. plan

Mar 17, 2021

Caveat: I originally wrote this review for the Royal Road version of this fiction, so it is organized the way that site encourages. However, it seems just as applicable here.

I find this story interesting because it is an excellent example of a fiction which avoids certain aspects that are often cornerstones of most novels, web or otherwise, but does not really suffer for it.

Characters: At the current point, there is very little in the way of characters. Of course, characters are described and observed, and any of the characters whose point of view we are following act naturally and with full internal narration of their actions.

However, there is very little direct narration given to the interaction between characters. What other characters say is, often, paraphrased rather than quoted. Instead of showing the conversation directly, the narrator summarizes the overview of the interaction. This does not apply to every interaction, but seems more common than would be expected.

This makes a lot of the characters feel less like characters and more like parts of the environment.

Grammar: I cannot really say much here beyond the obvious. The grammar is not perfect, some mistakes showing up throughout. However, it is far above the point where it is comfortable to read. It's all the sort of thing that enough careful combs through will spot and, unless you mind the occasional typo, you should not find it an obstacle to enjoyment.

Story: The story is clearly thought out, if sometimes erratic, and I am quite enjoying it. However, I think the author may be falling into the "I am following, so the reader will too" pitfall.

It is often tempting, especially when you are first writing into a narrative the complex and vivid world in your own mind to think that the reader can track what's happening. After all, the author understands it and sees how everything that is being described shows the world clearly.

However, there are a lot of cases where something major about the world is shown in this story and the narrative immediately moves on to something else equally or more major. It makes it hard for the reader to fully connect with the last thing and pick up on the minutia.

There is also a lot of movement from place to place, making it hard to get a mental grasp on the last location and the things within it before it is abandoned. It makes understanding the world rather hard, without being able to orient to specific environments. For example:

Spoiler

The initial forest is the setting that than becomes the spirit world, which is immediately replaced by the Ten Human Headed Hydra base.

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This is all logical, but feels like a rapid shift when reading. This is mostly a product of how unfamiliar the reader is with the world at this early stage, which makes it an extension of the first issue.

Based on what I have found to work, both for me and others, I would suggest assuming that you have both readers that are hyper aware and understanding everything you include and readers that are completely oblivious and need the story hammered into their heads. Include intricate world building and grand information for the attentive readers, and slow things down and sound them, at least the minimum needed to follow along, out for the ones who like being lead.

In reality, I think this works because every reader is a combination of both. Part of their brain enjoys the grand architecture, but another part wants to be able to lie back and enjoy the ride. Regardless, this is just what I have developed as an approach and understanding, and the author may have there own solutions or strategies.

Style: I honestly love the style, and don't think style choices should be something a critical review should comment on. It's like arguing over what kind of pizza tastes the best. You can determine individual preferences, and find which are most common.

But, in the end, it comes down to what different people prefer and is not a reason to say all pizza should be whatever flavor is most popular. As a result, I'll leave it there.

Overall: I left this for last, and put all the others out of classical order, because I believe my explanation of the story overall only makes sense after having said what I've said above. I frankly really like this story.

It breaks lots of the normative rules for a novel, and could likely benefit from partially incorporating a few of them, even if it would loose some of its value from over incorporating them. However, the result is still quite enjoyable to read along with.

The protagonist has a distinct sense of ruthless pragmatism, being something monstrous and even sadistic, but has its own internal reasoning separate from normative human morality.

The world, although hard to follow at times, is enjoyable to experience and plays into the dark unnaturalness of black magic, making it seem familiar to the protagonist's environment without loosing its twisted nature. This is impressive, since most attempts to show "dark" or "unnatural" magic from too close removes its wonderfully twisted feel.

As is expected from what sort of story it is, I think this will appeal to you as a reader if it's themes are something you normally enjoy. It capitalizes on horror (and not the cheap kind), schadenfreude on the part of the protagonist and truly gruesome mythological creatures. If any of those sound of interest, and you are not hung up on the parts this story less lacks than seems to not bother with, I would recommend reading.

Note: I am not sure why I cannot bold or unbold some of the section headings. It appears they will remain half bolded.

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Qwertyasdfg

Status: c35

Mar 19, 2021

Might not be for everyone.

The main character, the plot, the developments etc. Are all kinda edgy.

I have a soft spot for that kind of stuff so it was cool for the first couple scenes but for some other scenes it feels a bit oversaturated with edginess and starts bordering being cringey.

I kinda get that being dark and mysterious is the main theme of the story as the MC is a monster. But sometimes the average amout of ominous chuckes and evil cackling per chapter gets a bit too much for my taste.

Not much development for the plot yet so I cant really say much on that front.

If your down for a light read I recommend you give it a shot.

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