Well anyways, this story makes me want to read more as soon as possible, the chapters are short, cliffhangers are painful to wait through but when a new chapter is out, I must say I'd have a stupid grin plastered across my face while reading through the whole thing.

5 stars, wouldn't recommend dropping it.

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CrazyMinh

Status: 48 – chase scene

Jan 17, 2024

I haven’t got much to say on this story that is critical. The story has great technical quality. The characters are believable and likeable, although Renee does often come off as being rather abnormally chill with the existence of the portals (admittedly she’s been seeing then her entire life, but her rather underwhelming reaction to the first opening of one is... uh... well, it’s better than some of the under-reactions I’ve seen in fiction, but it’s still a weaker moment in a otherwise strong opening). The magic system, possibly the most important part of the worldbuilding in a story like this one, is well-developed and has a lot of interesting ideas. The general narrative is enthralling, with a good use of plot hooks, fantastic character interactions, and a premise which everyone with a interest in speculative fiction wishes was something they could do (gimme a portal to Elite: Dangerous already!!).

If I had to offer any serious criticisms, it is that this story is a bit rough when it comes to its exposition and descriptive writing. Exposition about the mechanics of the game world comes off a bit clunky, and a lot of the descriptions lack granularity and leave a lot of the heavy lifting to the audience when it comes to visualising the world. The egg related bits of the story are also not as well integrated as I’ve seen from other authors in the tg space, and sometimes feel a little bit too rote? It’s hard to describe my exact opinion on it. It’s both too tropey in execution and a bit too unique in approach if that makes any sense.

Whatever the case, one of the best stories on the site.

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Lexi

Status: 34 – cache

Nov 21, 2022

I couldn't help it but binge this story up to the most recent chapter and still hunger for more! Anyone who is a sucker for gender feels will surely enjoy it too.

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Kurumi69

Status: 59 – death flag

Feb 5, 2024

Would have given this a 3 stars, but I thought that's too cruel for a personal bias. I came here expecting some fluff but got drama instead. Still interesting enough to keep me reading though.

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