[A SI Harry Potter and Marvel (MCU) Xover Fanfiction]
A sick 16 year old MC dies at the same time, emerald eyes open up confused. Shouldn't I be dead? Why the hell am I so tiny? What's her name? What are these voices in my head?
Follow the young telepath as they make way in a world of gods and magic. Will they make their mark in this scary world or did they already do so. F*ck, time travel is really confusing.
I know that the beginning is not that good, tbh. It gets better with time, believe it.
I don't own pretty much anything in this Fanfic.
I took a lot of inspiration from the fic "A Long Journey Home" and used the prologue from "Rise of Arcane" to get things started.
The main character feels very bloated.
She is beautiful, has eidetic memory, has a tragic backstory, but also a more normal one on top of that, she knows the future, she has telepathy and can copy the skills and knowledge of others, she is basically female Harry Potter, she is rich, an orphan, an inventor, is a fusion of two souls and lives in the MCU. All of that happens in 5 chapters.
Honestly the only thing left, would be giving her a big d*ck and big tits. The MC loses her own character with every gimmick introduced and becomes just ridiculous.
The first few chapters were amazing, but after Morgan was introduced, the story became weird.
tl;dr only read if you share the author's fetish for inflicting emotional suffering on the MC just for the sake of them suffering, not for plot or anything.
The story is well-written for the most part, though there are random groups of chapters with notable spelling and grammar mistakes on occasion.
I want to say that the characters are interesting and well-developed, the author clearly demonstrates their ability to do this repeatedly, but they also have a habit of investing several chapters to introduce a really good character only to rip it up for no real reason. Sometimes the good character is replaced with a 2D cardboard cutout, sometimes not. There is literally no plot-relevance when it happens, it only drives character development once or twice, and more often than not it seems to be done for the express purpose of causing the MC great emotional suffering that does not actually affect the plot.
This is done from the very start of the story, with the main character no less. We spend the first 3 chapters establishing a setting and a very interesting MC named Jasmine. In chapter 4 she is replaced by isekai-reincarnator-42356 who we get like 2 paragraphs of backstory for. Then in chapter 5 SURPRISE! Jasmine is still alive inside her head so they apparently merge personalities, but then we just get paragraphs of soulless "MC did this and then did this" with nothing of the interesting Jasmine in it but also nothing new about isekai-reincarnator-42356 either. The story may as well have just started at that point, with isekai-reincarnator-42356 inheriting Jasmine's memories; instead, the entire setup was wasted with a lie that was so jarring and disappointing I nearly stopped reading right there.
(now I wish I had stopped there, I really do, but the author writes well and the concept really hooked me)
Later, we have several chapters setting up a love interest for the MC with a really interesting backstory and plenty of good development. All ripped away without serving any sort of character development for the MC, but purely to induce meaningless suffering. It was followed by a few paragraphs of "this happened and then MC went to place" and then POP here's Generic Love Interest 8673, MC's new very involved lover who totally has been around for hundreds of years just trust me guys. Even at this point, dozens of chapters later, I can't remember the new lover's name and they feel like a non-character to me; just another mob that gets mentioned occasionally for things that don't actually affect the plot in any way.
And then again, a daughter figure is used in a really convoluted way to induce a minor revelation to the MC but done in a specific way to cause the MC as much emotional torment as possible. After reading past that point and reading past a scene that clearly tries to explain the daughter figure being used for the revelation, it just rings hollow and doesn't feel like a real plot point, just a paper-thin attempt at justification - though this may be because I'm tired of the author's emotional suffering fetish by now and am colouring the event with that bias.
These aren't the only examples, just the biggest ones in my mind.
The first three chapters are evidence of a good writer. Good character development, scene setting, etc. The MC experienced realistic growth and struggles that aided in generating a three dimensional character I could get invested in.
Unfortunately, it seems the author really wanted to make it an isekai; this resulted in, what I consider, the worst possible execution of inserting isekai aspects. The main character that I had grown so attached to in those three chapters, an impressive feat, was essentially deleted; it felt horrible.
Despite this, I am fully willing to give the novel a second chance at a later date, as the first three chapters, like I said, were actually quite well written. I just hope that I can grow to like this new main character when I return.
Have gotten much further on ffn, story is okay and the magic system is inventive, but the MC is a very classic lesbian Mary Sue and that trope is overdone imo.
I don't know where to start with this, really. The characterization is great, and individually, each arc is really quite engaging. But already problems creep in. The inciting events are virtually universally contrived at best and nonsense at worst. The author has made a habit of introducing interesting characters, fleshing them out skillfully, then removing them from the story in some way. In other words, this fic is misery porn. As well, this fic has a problem with agency. It becomes more and more noticeable as you read further into the fic, but the seeds are there from the start.
willingly enslaving herself to Death on a whim.
Character develops over time. Story is good, but only really starts until ch.~ 60-100 (I think).
the arc when she returns to the present.
Another thing that I assume will be addressed later, but hasn't yet: (spoiler)
Olympic gods have basically been ignored. She kinda cheated on Hestia too btw.
The plot starts to thicken eventually, but for the first maybe 80 chapters, it's just epilogue. Which is still good of course. It's very entertaining still.
Review isn't complete to my standards, but I also need sleep so...
I don't really like this novel. The story is pretty decent I suppose but the main character is the blandest thing I've seen. She's not even 2 dimensional, she is 1 dimension and it shows. She doesn't even react that much to events. It ruins the story for me but maybe others won't mind it much. The story and side characters are pretty good.
The story was a bit bland in the first few chapters. Still, it was a Harry Potter fanfiction, where it didn't actually have a Harry Potter in it per se. So, I gave it a try.
Holy crap! This was a lot better than I expected. After I read the first 80 chapters or so here on ScribbleHub, I went to look for it on fanfiction dot net. I stayed up until like 3:30 am and had to force myself to put it down so I could actually get some sleep. Then I immediately picked it back up the next day and kept reading it again for hours.
There is a lot of things to like about this story, such as time travel, magic, meeting important characters of both the MCU and the Harry Potter universes. Still, the important thing is that the two universes are sewn together in one of the more creative ways I've seen yet.
I like that the character doesn't start out overpowered. I like that there are plenty of questions about what happens next or who is doing what. I like that the story is a long journey of self discovery, and how the character is certainly not perfect, despite being powerful.
Mistakes are made, loves are lost, home and family are found to be not as comforting or permanent as one might hope. Still our Jasmine makes a good a life for herself as she can, and affects the lives around her in ways that tend to make more of a positive difference than most.
The story is amazing, and I definitely look forward to more.
This is a very badly written story, everything is janky and utterly unclean. Characters don't make sense and contradict themselves regularly. The grammar is atrocious, gets actually worse over time. A bit like the instruction manual of cheap Chinese furniture. Fight scenes are the worst offenders, those are just plain boring.
The concept is interesting though, so at least there's something.
the first 15 chapters are quite rough with a lot of info dumps. If you persevere the novel gets quite good.
I like the worldbuilding and how every part of Marvel interacts with HP and it fits.
The only things that need to be improved are character interactions and more descriptions how characters react. Many react too logical or illogical and with what is essential essays in one block. It isnt even remotely realistic/good to read in that way. Also in the conversations the characters never seem to move/there are no descriptions of what they are doing when they talk. Areas could be better described. Many times the author also resorts to tell instead of show.
Also the author needs to improve their grammar. There aren't many errors but it's a little too simple.
Overall the author has much to improve. But the barebones are great and I really like the ideas of how to mix things up.