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Swordsman System In Naruto
Swordsman System In Naruto
94.9k Views 3030 Favorites 85 Chapters 2 Chapters/Week 602 Readers
4.2 (26 ratings)
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Synopsis

Yukan Norio, a boy living in Konoha with the soul of an earth resident.

He was an unplanned element who interfered with the course of the original story.

But, what if he also created some unexpected things?

What if there are unexpected twists?

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The Mc's behavior in the first few chapters is like that of an idiot. It is because someone living in our world would not be experienced in fighting and killing.

Genre
ActionComedyFanfictionMysteryRomance
Fandom
Naruto Tensura
Tags
N/A
Table of Contents 85
Show
  1. 84Jan 28, 2023
  2. 83Jan 23, 2023
  3. 82Jan 17, 2023
  4. 81Jan 16, 2023
  5. Temporary noticeJan 15, 2023
  6. 80Jan 10, 2023
  7. 79Jan 8, 2023
  8. 78Nov 30, 2022
  9. 77Oct 26, 2022
  10. 76Oct 25, 2022
  11. 75Oct 21, 2022
  12. 74Oct 20, 2022
  13. 72Oct 11, 2022
  14. 71Oct 10, 2022
  15. 70Oct 9, 2022
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      Benw8888
      Status: c68

      TLDR: Becomes better as time goes on. Characters feel real, and I’ve become engaged, although there is room for improvement regarding writing.

      First, I want to say that I’m more picky with what I read than most scribblehub readers, and I read this, so you should probably give it a go.

      I’ll mention the good parts first and then the bad parts later.

      The author has a good understanding of the naruto world. Characters feel in line with their canon counterparts. Also, the author uses frequent time skips, which means the plot progresses quickly and we aren’t waiting forever like stories that have 100k words all before academy graduation. Albeit a little stilted, characters still have their own personalities, and don’t appear to all be copies of the author. Our MC’s system is a little interesting even if it doesnt take the mainstage very often.

      Yukan may seem a little dry at first. However, he actually has been developed a lot as a character, growing from an isekai’d modern person to a war-weary experienced ninja who sighs at having to kill child soldiers but does it without remorse. He’s not guilty- he’s just tired. 

      His family situation has been given a lot of attention, and he has actual deep connections with other characters. This alone makes this novel better than most. 

      For things this novel could work on: mainly, the author could improve his writing technique. The first few chapters were written quite poorly, but not in the grammar sense (the author has surprisingly good grammar for a non-native speaker) - instead, they should flesh out scenes more, diving deeper into what is going on and what characters are feeling.

      As an author myself, I totally understand the urge to keep moving forward, and how difficult it is to add more sentences to a scene sometimes. But it’s worth it, and will make the story shine.

      Another minor nitpick is that sometimes there are places where a character should’ve spoken out according to his character. The author should always be thinking, “what would this character be thinking at this moment? Would they speak out?” For every character in a scene.

      Lastly, Yukan grew OP, and writing OP characters takes special consideration: the author should explain what Yukan is doing in fight scenes that allows him to be so OP, not just “he swung his sword and killed the enemy”- doing this for opponents that should be strong is unsatisfying to read.

      In the end, though, the author has shown a ton of improvement already and is better than a lot of scribblehub authors. If you’re a prospective reader, note that I rated this 5 stars, so you should read it :)

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