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Pokemon : An Unexpected Journey
Pokemon : An Unexpected Journey
305.8k Views 10975 Favorites 242 Chapters 8 Chapters/Week 1075 Readers
4.2 (56 ratings)
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      New DiscLat
      Status: lucario and austin

      I liked the story made and the dark plot that is being shown. Also like the small omake's.

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      New Cauldrons
      Status: vs the legendary titans

      I really did want to give this a higher rating but I just can't. Maybe it's due to personal preference but the story has gone is a completely wonky direction. It's not just that various problems both story wise & grammatically add up to make the story seem less and less polished as it goes on. Don't get me wrong in the beginning I was enjoying the story immensely, but I think as of now theirs a noticeable quality drop from what it once was.

      Starting with grammar/structure it's becoming clear the author doesn't proof read what he is writing anymore as some of the mistakes he's made could easily be caught by it. (Not damning itself since he may be foreign.), but the most damning problem is the author copy pasting of entire paragraphs from previous chapters to pad out the current one. It has happened multiple times with seemingly no rime or reason other than pure laziness. Along with other mistakes like using real world animals such as maggots and whales just make the story seem unrefined.

      Lets get started with the story & how it's structured. Unsurprisingly it was much better in the beginning than it is now. If I reviewed it earlier I may have given it as high as a review as the others did before me, but as of now it's far too messy. In the beginning we had much less POV switching (while it still existed it was much less & handled better.), but in later chapter it seem such more like literally anyone else is the main character. A good example of this would be Ash's (Austin's) battle in Lavender town. What should have been a tense and thrilling read was instead dragged on by countless variables. Firstly, the constant switching of POV's certain POV's can be excused such as the Marowak as it's directly tied to the plot, HOWEVER for some reason or another the author decided to cut during random points in the story to Cynthia defending her Championship title. (Not just once but throughout the lavender town fight) This battle was out of left field & brought nothing to Ashes situation. The only thing of note was the introduction of mega's but they didn't play a part at all in what should be our main concern.  Secondly, the villains entire backstory was shoved in-between this whole situation as well. An entire three chapters were spent solely to his backstory instead of through dialogue between characters. Thirdly, the author has started adding omake's to the end of his chapters. They aren't bad by themselves; in fact, they show just how creative the author is the problem lies in the fact that they almost take up a quarter if not more of the chapter. It just makes it seem like the author cares more about little random Pokémon facts he made up than the story itself.

      Finally the tone. I would say the beginning of the end to this story would be when his Pokémon died. The tone went from a semi-realistic Pokémon depiction to edge doom and gloom. At first it was a really good opportunity for self reflection and a reminder that he was in the living breathing world but slowly the author kept going making thing progressively worst and turned the MC into a typical edge lord the entire tone of the beginning lost. This in my opinion was the stories worst sin, I could overlook the other problems as growing pains and the stress of keeping up with chapters. But it's just not the same story anymore.

      Basically my problems can be summarized as this the story itself is suffering from quality control & the author is trying to add filler by constantly switching POV away from Austin; with the main character being turned into an edge lord.

      The author has a very creative mind and I'm in awe of it but the story it just too unstructured to hold itself up anymore. Granted most of my problems come from what I stated above & some people may take it as personal preference, but at the end of the day I felt the quality has plummeted too much. In the future I would love to be able to change my review to reflect a much higher score, but as of now in it's current state it gets a one-star from me.

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      3 Likes · Like
      Harem-Fan
      Status: yellow’s powers

      Br-uh, why does this story have the harem tag on it?! The MC is 10 and does not want to stay in this world and even though he is Ash the author constantly calls him Austin, I get it and all but its annoying, dude your Ash deal with it! If you are here for a harem scram there wont be any!!!, if your here for Pokemon then stay because its the best for Pokemon fan-fictions, its really good for that, but its useless if you want waifus. Even though I have not caught up to where the other reviewers have gotten too, my name is Harem-fan and not Poke-fan so ya my review is based on the lack of a true harem. Wont read without waifus... REMOVE THE USELESS HAREM TAG!!!

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      12 Likes · Like
      Zerburos
      Status: this is not a game

      [Chapter 150 review]

      This Fanfic is a piece of brilliant and exploitative writing into all of the Pokémon lore, anime, manga, and games. While as a read may recognize events, people, and Pokémon, you will see something new and interesting. While people might love the originals content, I love this fanfic more for it's willingness to take the reader into the dark elements of the Pokémon world, and make it feel real. The author is even brave and brilliant to make the villains of the Pokémon world seem fresh, instead of cliche 90 mustache twirling villains.

      Truly, if you want a story that has elements you love (Pokémon), mix in some real elements, which feels like a roller-coaster of emotion leaving you on the edge of your seat wanting more...

      Then give this delightful fanfic a through read.

      With the events around chapter 140 or so, I bumped my rating to a 5, a masterpiece work for me.

      [Chapter 30 reiew]

      Read this on a lark, seeing that the author posted 30 chapters in the span of 1 or 2 days. And I pleasantly surprised within the first 5 chapters.

      The story is solid, in that our character Austin somehow finds himself in the body of Ash Ketchum, but at the start of his journey, in the old 80s/90s anime series. And it's a mystery of figuring out why Austin is all of a sudden living Ash's journey, while thinking of how he might be able to get home.

      And in those first 5 chapters, we already see the author breaking from the anime or mangas. Having caught a Spearow in the time period. This leading to his "traveling companions" being slightly different also. But Pikachu is still a delightful, and even helpful stable of the seires, for our Austin. (Though, like the series our MC has to win the trust of Pikachu before he starts being a supportive companion, ha 😄)

      That aside, the author does a good job making the story more "real", like how's it's talked about that Spearows actually eat other bug Pokémon, or that an enemy Ekans almost eats a Rattata. It has humor and fluffy bounding moments like the anime, but there are darker themes under the story that the anime almost never touches or is hinted at in the extended lore. Which makes the story all the more interesting to read.

      However, while I love the story, binge read all 30 chapters in about a day, I give this a 4 our of 5 stars cause of grammar and punctuation mistakes. Which while not bad enough to be off-putting, the story is very well done, the mistakes are distracting for me. But I can seem them easily being ignore by a majority of Pokémon/Fanfic readers.

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      AsianInvasion111
      Status: this is not a game

      Honestly the writing is pretty good. But for a pokemon fanfic, I was expecting a more original character. Austin is an isekai'd character in the pokemonverse with his modern knowledge of the show/anime. So he's smarter than Ash in the way he fights and actually wins gym battles. But personality and his emotional eq for pokemon is literally the exact same as the real ash Ketchum, which honestly is a major disappointment for me. It's really annoying to see a guy who is a pokemon lover come into his fantasy and acts exactly the same as the main character he complains about. Like dude cmon??? You've seen it happen, you've even said you're not gonna do it. Why are you doing the exact same thing??!? He should even know about Jesse and James attacking the pokemon center in viridian city, like hello where's your f**king brain?? Did you become mentally handicapped on the transfer over to the pokemon world?? All in all. The battles are good, but there's plot holes that are highly aggravating. It's hard to take the protagonist seriously outside of his training or battle scenes.  [edit 1.] forgot to post that I haven't come across any big official romance so for now the romance tag feels misleading. But I will update further later on.

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      3 Likes · Like
      SnafuSam
      Status: training on sulphur island

      I opened this seeing the Pokémon and harem tags, expecting/hoping to find an s*xy adventure through the Pokéworld... I was very disappointed to find a lack of s*x.

      While blown away with an unbelievable piece of literature which has outstanding characters, an amazing world-analysis and a dark twist that makes my heart throb for more!

      While I might not advise this for children, anybody who has ever been interested in Pokémon, NEEDS to read this!

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      3 Likes · Like
      GhoulDrago
      Status: the tree of life

      This fic is pretty amazing, although the harem tag is misleading and the only romance here is a one sided crush, the world building and writing easily compensates for it.

      Only problem I have, though would be that Ash is

      Spoiler

      is going fully edgy protagonist mode right now, although given his trauma it's kinda expected

      [collapse]

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      1 Likes · Like
      BDF2
      Status: funeral

      Compelling world building, really strong start and exploration of kids show theme meets real world pragmatism. Later stories have more time skips (most are explained), and grammar errors but not enough to detract from the whole.

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      0 Likes · Like
      Beanjamcake
      Status: the chains of death
      Started this out of pure chance but the writing compelled me to stay & make an account to follow it. Which speaks a lot about the writing & story. I was going to add more but @Zerburos has already stated what I wanted to say.."a story that has elements you love (Pokémon), mix in some real elements, which feels like a roller-coaster of emotion leaving you on the edge of your seat wanting more..."
      Truly I never though that what made me cringe slightly in the beginning would end up keeping me on edge. (At this point I cant even tell whats going to happen especially with the Pokémon battles) While the dark plot may seem sad since Pokémon was originally a somewhat lighter story it really adds to everything, especially with what Ash goes through... well no spoiler intended
      Spoiler

      (PTSD)

      [collapse]

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      0 Likes · Like
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