Have you ever wondered what Harry Potter should have been like, if Harry really was treated like he was by the Dursleys and then by the kids at school? Me, too. Let's see what happens.
I'm writing this for fun, and it's been fun. 馃槉
Harry Potter is (TM) and (C) J.K. Rowling. Image grabbed from Google and edited with title.
I'll be honest here, I enjoy reading this story until about chapter 30 where everything start going downhill for my taste.
First you portray Fred and George being an intolerable bully in front of Harry, while Ron being a victim that deserve pity. That kill some of my mood since Fred and George are one of few people that never hold prejudice against Harry. Even Ron the so called best friend alineated Harry on Fourth years because of envy.
Secondly, you overexaggerated Harry reaction to every trivial things in Hogwarts, such as ghosts to the point he almost exorcise them and got reprimand by Minerva (and made Harry explode in anger for injustice reprimanded). Unlike canon, Harry here already got knowledge and even perform some spells before he enter Hogwart, so he shouldn't be that reactive to every single magical happenings such as ghost. Even the teachers didn't deserve to be scolded that harshly by Harry just because he got scared of damn harmless ghost.
And lastly, I dislike the way you portrayed Dumbledore as evil manipulator. Don't get me wrong, I agree that Dumbledore is a manipulative bastard that more paranoid than mad eye Moody. But he isn't that evil like how you portrayed him to be, to the point he manipulated every trivial things around Harry such as intentionally order Molly Weasly to force his son to befriend Harry.
Overall I'll rate it as 3/5 despite my complains since I quite enjoy the ride in the few dozens early chapters.
Hope you'll improve more of your writing, since writing fanfiction sometimes is more difficult than original since you're bound by canon.
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Partially realistic in his reactions
But this is clearly not harry from the movies or the books
It seems to be treating this harry as the author's vehicle and reacting how he would which isn't bad
But the summary of this story should reflect that
Ie "a harry how the author thinks he should've been"
Keep the good work
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If it was an original work and not a fanfiction of Harry Potter, I would give it a 3-4 stars. The quality is good, but everything is so dreadful in the world, like everything is being seen in a very negative and pessimistic view. And since there's no insightfulness to be gained from the novel, I wouldn't read it at all. It's just depressing. Then I would subtract another 2 stars since it doesn't really follow the spirit or thematics of harry potter. So it's not really inspired by Harry Potter. That said, it's written well, so if that's all you're looking for, then go ahead.
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Alright! So I was never a fan of fanfiction. But this? Gosh, it's so well written that I have to leave a review. A must read!
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First, I'll note that over half of the reviewers of this story read this complete to the finish... this is amazing, right?!聽 Re-reading this old review of mine now that I'm doing my 3rd reading of this story. If you enjoy the Potterverse but find the behavior of various adults in it silly; this is the story for you! (Read the spoiler in this review.) I very much enjoyed this long, but not tediously epic, revision of how Harry Potter's experience at Hogwarts might have played out if he behaved more like a charismatic and magically gifted child-abuse victim and not an overconfident simpleton with plot armor.
If you're familiar with the Harry Potter series, and you're an adult, or intelligent younger person, there are probably a lot of things that seem a bit off with the story until you reach the final books and are given a glimpse into a world that Harry never figures out exists.聽 You will enjoy this extremely well done fanfiction that sheds light on the following (not spoilers, but re. HP cannon) :
If one day a year is all that he needed to spend with family, like he does during the entirety of the book series once he attends Hogwarts, to preserve Lily's protection over Harry, why create an abusive family situation for the child of destiny and deny him access to his wizard heritage and wealth by forcing him to live with muggles who despise him?... How does this facilitate his "destiny"? Why was this necessary?
How did Dumbledore end up with access to Harry's family vault? (Don't tell me that anyone can walk into a bank, with an obviously clueless child, and gain access to a family account. Dumbledore had access before, and must have authorized Hagrid access as well.) What was done with the vast family fortune for the entirety of Harry's life?
Why keep the Philosopher's stone poorly protected in a castle (two kids were able to fly there in a flying car, crash, and walk away without being noticed), rather than well protected inside a centuries old, magical, goblin patrolled, dragon protected, enchanted vault? (How did he know someone would break-in to get it, and if they could break into a bank vault, why move the "bait" into an area frequented by children?!)
Why did Dumbledore protect a confirmed Deatheater and Jame's Potter's enemy, while arresting the individual named to be Harry's guardian, Sirius Snape; failing to offer Veritas serum, or use Legilimency to test his innocence and signing off on his 13 year incarceration and torture without a trial?
Why is Hogwarts so criminally mismanaged?!!!! Examples: Why would a Headmaster of a school full of 11-year old kids put monster dogs on the 3rd floor, have security so lax that giants and basilisks can somehow wander the halls (even though sentient pictures everywhere can notify him of what is happening) ? WTF are kids are given time machines to use without supervision?!?!聽 Why are kids are placed under the supervision of a mentally challenged (though well intentioned) giant zookeeper with a fondness for carnivorous beasts so dangerous that EVEN AMONGST WIZARDS they cannot be kept in captivity? What is the purpose behind a giant killer tree on the premises? Why is there no barrier preventing the children from entering the extremely deadly forest filled with giant spiders and other killer creatures? Same question, regarding Black Lake, filled water demons and a giant squid?... this is a long-standing problem; teacher Dumbledore made no effort to rehabilitate or help the thieving, sadistic and duplicitous Tom Riddle (whom he did see through, even as a student) and this neglect set the stage for the war... oops!
Why can't a prestigious school manage to hire competent wizards, who care about the students, and instead hires possessed weirdos, doppelgangers, wizard-supremacists (who teach poorly), and multiple dangerously incompetent instructors. (Keep in mind that Dumbledore is an expert in Leligmancy and could literally read minds during teacher interviews and truth serum is not terribly difficult to create or procure, and reasonably applied, given the sensitive nature of the position that they are volunteering to apply for.) What would it take to make the adults stop students from assaulting other students? (Who would tolerate the poisonous aristocratic snobbery of house Slytherin and let them go unpunished?!)
What is up with the Tri-Wizard Tournament death challenge? Shouldn't a responsible adult have said, "No, this child cannot participate"? Why not just cancel the entire event, at least until you can find out who was able to circumvent the advanced magical protections and put Harry's name in the cup (pretty obviously another Voldemort plot; there was one each year prior, so this should have been the obvious conclusion). And, if Harry was obligated to "participate" why not sandbag each event, not really participating.... sure Gryphindor wouldn't be able to participate otherwise, but that is just life. It isn't always fair and unfortunate things happen that neither magic or heroism can fix (apparently)... perhaps a good lesson for children to learn.
Why does Dumbledore tell NOBODY about the prophecy that Voldemort might still be alive (which is documented even within the Ministry of Magic with an active) after the first attempted resurrection... or the second... and why was Harry never told by Dumbledore? How is it that they are unaware of what the prophecy says, given that they are maintaining the record; why was Dumbledore actively hiding this? (Dumbledore was the only living person with knowledge of the prophecy aside from Severus Snape, who told the Prophecy to Voldemort resulting in the death of Harry's parents... before he was hired to teach children. Harry stumbled the Prophecy Record sphere while trespassing at the Ministry of Magic.)
Why did Dumbledore never give Harry any meaningful special training, given that he clearly believed Harry must face off against him? (Lupin taught him the patronus. Sirius Nobody thought an animagus form might be helpful for Harry?) The most helpful educators to Harry in the entire series were... death eaters?!?!!
Why were all the heroes in this story bullies and their associates? Honestly, James and Lily were horrible to fellow students (Lilly essentially defended her boyfriend and associates while they victimized her oldest friend). Unregistered animagus. Squibs are so universally denigrated and mistreated in the magical world that the common practice is to send them off to live with muggles instead of being ridiculed. Lets not talk about house elves, their magical enslavement and conditioned slave mentality.聽
... well, according to cannon, the answers to the above are obvious.
"So when the time comes... the boy must die?" (Snape)
"Yes. Yes... he must die." (Dumbledore)
"You've kept him alive so that he can die at the proper moment."
"Everything was supposed to keep Lily Potter's son safe. Now you tell me you have been raising him like a pig for slaughter..." (Snape)
"Don't tell me now that you've grown to care for the boy." (Dumbledore)
聽 - The Deathly Hallows
Judge for yourself whether the secret actions of War General Dumbledore, regarding the child, Harry Potter, was moral and justified "for the greater good" or not. But do so with open eyes, and not viewing the man as a dottering grandfatherly mentor with a penchant for candy.聽
(Is the wizarding world even worth saving?!)
The author gives Harry Potter more credit than the original books, by allowing him to see, much earlier, the incongruity in what he is being told vs. experiencing at Hogwarts.聽 This story diverges from the cannon story, above, by providing circumstances for Harry to break away from his original role as a clueless na茂ve pawn.聽聽
I'm going to out myself as a Bokuboy fanboy, as I've enjoyed several of his stories multiple readings.聽 The story, currently, is at a place where the author could call it "finished".聽 Personally, I'm hoping he continues the story, as THIS Harry would likely live an interesting life, rather than settle in and do nothing but produce a single magical Weasley-spawn who does dumb magical stuff.
(Darn it, after rewriting this review, I kinda want to read this story... again... again.)
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I tried to like this story allot. It started off in a way I liked, a bit awkward but altogether good. Honestly the fact harry has a selective short fuse and alot of hidden anger isnt really surprising. However, it doesnt make you think of a hero, he does some slightly heroic actions in trying to protect hermione though.
Perhaps hermione is my biggest gripe. She hasn't shown her Gryffindor characteristics at all, just a phobia of ghost that has popped up and being totally okay with destroying thinking beings.
Harry honestly seems to be cruelly lashing out at the things he thinks are different and scary, sometimes in deadly ways. This is a classic cycle of abuse that he has got from living with the Dursleys. I hope that he can overcome it.
The other main gripe is about how strong he becomes in such a short time.聽 Second most unrealistic part, first being hermione.
I've actually talked myself into continuing to read in hopes of that.
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And nope. I tried reading one more chapter but its so dumb. Might technically be more "realistic" but none of the characters feel like their originals. If it gets better, someone message me.
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Cons: The author adds some of those forced anime lucky events. With kids.聽
Pros: The scenes are emotional and interesting, they really draw you in. Though you do have to get used to Harry having a different personality.
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I have thoroughly enjoyed reading this story.
And yes, this version of HP actually does make much more sense than the original.
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In my opinion, this is one of the better Harry Potter fanfictions out there. It is well written, and does a decent job of changing Harry's perception of the wizarding world, than how it was protrayed in the books.
Some aspects are a little iffy, but where the story really shines is in the relationships that Harry makes, and how he approaches magic.
If you are reading this to find anither harem novel, where Harry dives into Hogwarts hips first, you won't find that here. If you are reading this to see a new and sometimes really emotional start to someones life that has thus far been filled with abuse, Then grab some tissues.
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This is a 5 star for me. This is the first time I'm completing a fanfiction with a complete satisfaction and joy on my face. I thank the Author Boku for this amazing Master-piece.聽
If u r done with this, check what-ifs from the same author. They r next level fun!!
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