[Alex POV] 

If somebody was ever curious about how death feels, then I would describe it in two words. 

Dark and Cold 

That is the only coherent thought that is passing through his mind... 

‘Wait a minute, since when can you think and feel shit after dying??’ 

‘it’s not like I’m an expert or something but I'm pretty sure I shouldn’t be feeling anything, let alone be able of forming any coherent thoughts right about now.’ 

This and what I would call the last moments of myself are getting increasingly confusing. Since I left the house and got to school, everything has just been exceedingly weird.  

The school making the teachers do rollcall themselves, the constant unease and growing tension in my head when those names were being called out. Every single one of them causing a slight tremor in my head that even though it was a bit annoying it was a bit manageable, I thought I was just seriously tripping about something, even though I had no clue what the hell that might be. 

But that name... the person with the name Rose, it’s extremely unsettling how severe the reaction my body had with regards to it, it was not normal in the slightest.  

‘Not like there’s anything normal about floating through what I assume to be the road to the afterlife while thinking about a person who should or should not exist...’ 

‘But this feeling, this constant anxiety I can feel somewhere on this floating body of mine which I'm not even sure is my real body, maybe my soul but that’s even more confusing. How profound or serious was the relation between us that it is even etched into my very soul that even the thought me having the audacity to forget her is causing me to feel an unbearable amount of guilt.’ 

If my memory was really tampered with then I wonder what kind of phenomena could cause such a thing and I'm pretty sure I wasn’t the only one if that news report in the morning was anything to go by. 

I don’t even know what to do or think anymore, the fact that my perception of reality is being flipped over on it’s head isn’t helping me deal with the ever-growing number of thoughts in my head beginning to consume me. Even though I seem to have this never-ending expanse of space filled with nothing but me, I can’t seem to find it in me to do much of anything else but reminisce about my life...or well in this case, the life I lived. 

Maybe it’s this space affecting me  but it’s difficult to even think of the earlier points in my life or if it’s a side effect of the memory loss but I can only think of my last 3 years in high school and maybe some time before that. 

Other than the regular school stuff, I never really did do much of anything, I participated in few important events and had some fun while doing it but I can’t seem to remember doing much in my personal life apart from playing video games, consume porn, read novels and working out to be in shape for the sports I play. 

I do remember playing what seemed to be football cup match though, scoring and assisting the crucial goals that won us what I think is some national trophy or something and maybe a district basketball tournament as well. These events feel so out of touch and hazy that I’m having a difficult time even reconciling if that was even me at all. 

What’s funny is that Eeven though someone who does all these things should seem to be one of the most popular guys in school but I somehow avoided most public gatherings with school mates and fumbling any prospective dates i seem to have seldomly gotten. 

I had good grades, a good athletic life but it seems other than that i had nothing else going for me. How can someone with so many good talents be so socially awkward, it just downright weird and jarring to be honest.’ I grumble inwardly to myself. 

‘it seems like the bloodline ends with me hehe, I feel like my parents would be sincerely disappointed with how I turned out, or maybe they would’ve set me straight and put me on the right path, I don’t know. Somebody like me with no goals or any large aspirations for their life shouldn’t have had so many privileges to begin with, someone else would’ve been better off with all the shit they left me with anyway.’ 

 I think to myself again and it seems that the longer i spend in this space the  more I seem to be inclined to depressive thoughts more than usual. 

I’m starting to even doubt myself even more now and it seems like I’m still in for some alone time with this black void for a while, I really hope my soul can hold on to its sanity for at least a good portion of that. 

----------------------------- 

After an indefinite time floating through the void, I am extremely confident my brain has short-circuited somewhere along the way, wait, do souls even have a brain??? Not that I would know anyway. 

The only good news about this experience is that i could somewhat still create coherent thoughts or what I assume it is, but I have spent the last I don’t know days, months, years maybe even decades just looking out into this void or abyss or whatever it is and really came to the conclusion that there really is nothing in place.  

NOTHING! 

I am pretty sure whatever it is I am feeling that makes it ‘feel’ as if I'm in a body is some kind of hallucination too.  

Even though there were jokes on social media that men can really sit down and think about a whole bunch nothing used to be really funny and how amusing it is women can’t do the same... 

 It really isn’t funny anymore!!! 

That is what I was thinking until something finally happened.  

A bright white light shone out in the distance or maybe was it actually quite close, I'm not really sure how far away it was before it finally engulfed me completely until I lost consciousness for the first time in I don’t know how long... 

------------------------------------- 

I have no recollection of how long I slept but I'm pretty sure it was a while. I was just glad the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes wasn’t that black void of nothingness again, even though what I saw wasn’t the craziest thing in the world considering I've seen it many times before but it was at least something. 

That something was a clear blue sky, stretching for who knows how long, I'm not sure if I'm even on a planet or some flat continent but I really don’t care for the semantics when what I’m sleeping on are literal CLOUDS! 

Whoever it is who sent me here, I should at least thank them for giving the experience of what a cloud feels like... (though what i really wanted to do as a kid was sky dive right through em but hey beggars can’t be losers I guess). 

After a while of fooling around lying on the clouds, I stand up and try to see where to go from here but it would seem that this place is also never-ending. 

‘Just great Alex, you escaped one black void to come to practically a new one, just 2 variety of colours this time, what’s next, a world where all you can see are the 7 colours of the rainbow...’  

I walk this new space for a little while before two large white doors appear suddenly in front of me. 

‘Sure not creepy at all’ 

*Knock-knock*  

“Uhm hello!” I shout out before knocking on the door which inadvertently causes it to open slightly. 

“Oh well what’s the worst that could happen, I’m already dead anyway?” I say, seemingly trying to hype myself up as I push open the large doors that don’t even feel as heavy as they should with regards to their size. 

*Whoosh* 

A huge gust of wind suddenly comes out of nowhere inhibiting my vision slightly before I open them again to see the wonderous sight that is...my...room? 

I mean sure, it’s larger than it should be, the queen sized bed is almost triple what it was but I would recognise those white sheets with streaks of black anywhere, the two large pillows are also too familiar for me to say otherwise. 

Let's not even talk about the gaming desk on the left side of the room, the huge body length mirror on the opposite side with an inconspicuous dustbin in the far corner as well. 

The only thing that is different is that there are no windows for some reason I guess and an open ceiling showing this world or space’s clear blue sky and what is probably the biggest elephant in the room.  

There is a tall, somewhat naked figure sleeping in the middle of the bed without a care in the world. She seems to almost be my height just a little shorter than I think maybe around 180cm probably. 

“Uhh, I’m not really sure what’s going on here but can you at least get off my bed please??” I plead to the naked girl, hoping she would hear me even though I'm still standing in front of the two large doors. 

“Hmmm” the person mumbles before slowly, a bit too slowly, rises up from the bed, now displaying her immaculate figure right in front of my eyes.  

Long sleek waist length blonde hair, clear sky blue eyes, a slim but perfect waist falling to immaculate curves on a perfect ass that are on full display now as she raises her arms above her head in what I assume is a stretch, large and I mean large but perfectly shaped tits that has no business being on such a body, a face so beautiful that I swear it’s what those people in cultivation novels would describe in what they would call a jadelike beauty. 

“Uhhmm, who are you” I ask quite simply. 

“Ohhh” a soft but mesmerizing voice says somewhat absentmindedly. 

“You’re actually here, and so soon at that.” she replies quite lazily as she carries on stretching her body. 

“If i knew you were gonna get here so soon, I would’ve slept much earlier then” she says, but I can’t really decide if the tone in her voice is annoyance at me for waking her up or if she didn’t get to sleep a little more. 

‘Bitch, I’ve been wandering around who god knows where for who god knows how long and this is the introduction I’m getting.’ 

“So can you tell me who you are now” i say as kindly as possible, trying not to reveal my inner thoughts at all 

“I heard that... by the way, how rude of you, and I thought you were the shy type” she says as she lifts her hand to mouth as she yawns audibly before saying 

“To answer your question, obviously I’m a Goddess, what else would you think when seeing a beauty like me” the subtle arrogance in her tone is hard to miss. 

“hehe, I honestly didn’t think you would have made it out of the void so quickly and still sane at that, it seems I’ve chosen the perfect mortal” her bell like giggle echoes out in the room, dulling my thoughts, making it difficult to catch onto what she just said...