It was the sudden brightening that woke her. The warmth of the sun on her face was not at all like the moments before.

Lia sucked in a lungful of air and jolted up into a sitting position in shock. This was not the inn. Nor was she wrapped in blankets.

Her eyes were unfocused as she tried to make sense of everything around her.

What just happened?

“Tch. What are you jumping for, Your Highness?” There was derision in the tone, as if the speaker felt they were far superior to the world around them.

Glancing over, Lia found herself facing someone who looked familiar, but she could not remember the woman’s name. The woman was a typical blue eyed Roamian with barely a discerning feature. There was nothing memorable about her, but Lia knew that this was a maid.

A maid that had traveled with her to Soce many years ago.

It hit her quickly, but then she realized that this was not the carriage she had been riding in. Turning her head to the side. She peered at everything before her. She immediately knew that this was the poorest carriage that had belonged to her family.

She had ridden in this carriage four years ago.

But I was just…

“I’m not dead?” Lia questioned as she tried to understand what had happened.

“Did you perhaps bump your head, Your Highness?” The maid asked with eyebrows twisted in scorn.

Lia did not answer as she turned to look at where the brightness had come from. The nearby curtain had come undone from the hook and fallen. It was from here that the light had hit her face. The clear window revealed the green meadow the carriage was passing and the sight of an armored man on a horse.

She leaned closer to the window. Looking out, she could see many more men and carriages. A caravan that had traveled from Roam and was now heading to the capital of Soce.

I remember this…

Lia thought to herself as she remembered.

This was the trip where she had gone as a trade to Soce. Her brother had called her a hostage to be used for the safety of their people.

There had been nothing but unhappiness on this trip. From the hidden gazes of the Soceans to the rickety carriage. She remembered how the trip had been both physically unpleasant and mentally exhausting.

She had not wanted to be there. She had not wanted to go to Soce and marry their king.

But I didn’t marry the King…

“His Highness understands that you do not wish to go to Soce, but you must understand that this is for the good of Roam.”

The maid’s voice brought Lia’s attention back to her.

I remember her.

Lia frowned as she looked at the maid. She remembered how this maid had acted. How the Crown Prince had assigned her, but that she was really a spy for the Queen of Roam.

Her thoughts traveled to the Crown Prince and queen. The very thought made her flinch. She struggled to push all thoughts of the Roam family from her mind and merely turned to look out the window again.

At first it was to distract herself, but then she began to think about the life she had just led. She was certain that she had lived four years in Roam as the Crown Princess and then as the Queen. Four years of being confined to a bedchamber with little agency.

Lia was not sure if it was just a dream or if it had truly happened, but her feelings seemed like it was more than just a dream.

She did not remember everything, but it was enough that it felt like she had truly experienced it. Memories that had faded with age.

It was different than a half-remembered dream.

“I understand you might not wish to marry the King but this is something you must do.” The maid continued as if that earlier flinch had been about Lia’s fate. “You will also be presented with wealth beyond measure as the Queen of Soce.”

Wealth beyond measure.

Lia said nothing, remaining completely quiet, but inwardly she chuckled at the thought. If her dream was not a dream, then this maid would constantly be after the wealth that Lia would gain as gifts through this marriage.

How to tell if it’s true?

Lia mused to herself while the woman continued to prattle on about the benefits that this marriage would bring to Roam, but Lia ignored her voice.

Instead, she thought hard and tried to remember what would happen on the way to Soce.

Four years had been such a long time and there had been so much worse that happened in the years after. Everything felt like a blank besides her first look at the King and how he had given her to the Grand Duke.

Lia frowned and idly rubbed between her forehead before another realization sunk in.

My hands!

My skin!

She stared down at her delicate hands. They were milky white with well-manicured fingernails. Gone were the patches from her failing health. She turned her hands over and back again, not finding a single blemish to hint at the life she had led.

“Your Highness?”

Lia glanced over and saw the maid looking at her with a strange expression. Lia said nothing to her, merely stared at the woman. She did not remember how she had felt about this maid so long ago, but she suddenly felt like she did not like this woman.

Finally, the maid looked away in discomfort.

“Damn half wit princess.” The maid mumbled under her breath, but Lia still heard her.

Lia shrunk in a little on herself and focused on the window once more. She savored the sight of the sky and trees.

Even if it was a dream, it felt so real…

Her thoughts were once more interrupted by the sudden jostling of the carriage. Nearly thrown out of her seat, she managed to brace herself against the opposing side. It brought another sense of wonder as she realized her body was truly healthy.

Then she remembered this event.

We broke a wheel! And one of the soldiers offered to let me ride his horse.

Lia frowned as she remembered how she had rebuked the soldier. She had been rude and arrogant, refusing to ride the horse and insisted on waiting for them to repair the carriage or to provide her with a new one.

Strangely, she did not feel the same emotion as she considered the problem now. It was as if she was not the ‘her’ in the dream.

She did not remember why she had refused.

Was I afraid of horses?

“Your Highness, are you all right?” The voice that called from outside the carriage was a familiar one.

It had been the last voice she heard before she died.

Calix!

She did not remember Calix being with her on the trip last time. She did not hesitate to look out the window, but she only saw the soldiers dressed in the black armor. There was no sign of the Grand Duke.

Lia leaned through the window and tried to see if there were any other people nearby, but it was only the man on the horse.

“We’re fine.” The maid responded for her.

“It appears the wheel broke.” A voice called out.

The speaker, a soldier, came from behind the wagon. Lia could immediately see the difference between the armors. This soldier’s armor was just as well made. It just was not as intricate as the man who had asked about her.

Calix?

She questioned herself as she turned to look at him. A macabre black helmet matched his armor and hid his face. There was no way for her to see if he was the Grand Duke.

“We have orders to reach the palace by nightfall.” The man spoke with Calix’s voice. “Your Highness, I apologize, but you will need to ride the horse with me.”

The voice flashed through her mind like a bolt.

It is him!

Her heart began to begin beating faster as she stared at him. A second realization came quickly.

Calix had been with her for the entire trip. He had been the soldier who had offered to carry her with him. He had been the soldier that she refused and treated like he was less than the dirt beneath her feet.

The barest feeling of shame bubbled up in her heart.

What did he think of me? She wondered as she stared at him. Why didn’t he ever tell me?

Silence hung before he spoke once more.

“Your Highness?” He asked.

“I’m afraid Her Highness is not-” The maid started.

“I will.” Lia quickly cut her off before opening the door on her own. She ignored the choked sound from behind her as she took a step down from the carriage. The maid’s opinions were not even half as important to her as trying to give Calix a much better opinion of herself.

Yet that single move had her faltering.

In her dream, she could not walk. Her legs had become useless after the Queen Mother had ordered her knees broken and her heels to be cut.

They had feeling. They could move.

My legs!

Calix, it seemed, did not want to waste any time over her sudden pause as he reached down to lift her off the step. She gasped as he pulled her easily onto his horse like she weighed nothing. His arm sliding around her in that familiar protective grasp.

“Repair the carriage. Another will be back to collect whatever is on this one.” Calix said without hesitation before he urged the horse forward.

The horse moved at an even pace, but Lia’s mind had begun to turn over what she remembered and how everything felt so real. By the time they reached the palace, she had made up her mind that everything had happened.

That she had lived four years of horror in Roam after rejecting Calix.

That she had experienced the worst four years of her life at the hands of her family.

That she had died after being abandoned by them.

Otherwise, she had no explanation for why she knew Calix’s voice.

Without hesitation, she decided she was going to do everything differently. Starting from this moment when she chose to ride his horse.