Nine months ago…

 

Everything was great! It was the last day of the class-J experience, which made me a little sad. I was going to have to get to my boring job and do boring independent things. Ugh… work! Thinking. I shuddered at the thought. 

 

Well, I didn’t have the words for this at the time. All that was operating was my tiny little lizard brain, given a heavy chemical dose of various different neurotransmitters. And it did all the thinking for me. Putting words to those thoughts and feelings had to be done in hindsight. 

 

It was… Mistress! The big, beautiful mess of vines that had protected me for so long. She was going to domesticate me soon and make the happy thoughts keep going forever! Everything was going to be great, all the time, and it was never going to stop. That was what she had promised me, and I couldn’t wait! I wanted it right then ! 

 

My lizard brain had suffered massively in terms of vocabulary. It could barely even get words out at this point, its intelligence currently asleep. All it knew was happiness. 

 

“Love… Mistress!” I exclaimed, exceedingly happy that I had managed to get out those two words on the first try. The Affini, in return, lit up with joy, its eyes turning a bright yellow. 

 

“Who’s a good girl?” Mistress exclaimed, and somehow I got even happier as I anticipated my head getting scratched. Every vine felt nice and cool and refreshing and exciting and great. “You are!” she exclaimed, my moronic brain feeling both surprised and happy as I felt vines scratch my head. 

 

I was naked, save for some cute knee-high socks that Mistress had given me, nothing standing between Mistress’s gentle touch and me. She could do whatever she wanted, and I loved everything she could do. 

 

“Alright, Vanessa… I’m sorry, Petal, but you have to go talk to some other florets now, okay?”

 

I wanted to be with Mistress, not any of the… other florets? I was already a floret?!! Oh my stars! Mistress was great! Had she given me an implant? I wanted an implant! 

 

Mistress let go of me, letting me fall into the rest of the soft room. Everything was a nice, bright color, with a lot of pink! Pink was my favorite! I loved pink! It was a beautiful color! Especially pastel pink… that was also Mistress’s favorite color! Mistress was the best! There were tons of fun, gigantic structures for me to crawl on too!

 

I couldn’t walk, but that was fine, because I could crawl across the squishy floor for as long as I wanted. Crawling was really nice, because I could just sit down whenever I wanted, or curl up. I didn’t need to sit down anymore! Or think about stuff… that was soooo boring. I crawled out to look for some other cute florets. They were cute too, but I was the cutest one! Mistress had told me that, and she never lied. Never! Except when she was trying to bring me here, but I’d been being stupid. I’d been trying to think . I’d been trying to be someone other than the cute pet I was meant to be. 

 

The other florets were having a cute cuddle pile! I wanted to join in! And I did, diving on top of them and nonverbally smiling at them. I couldn’t talk anymore. It was just too hard. I just wanted to do things. Maybe check boxes. One of the florets here had gotten to check boxes, and I wanted to do it too! Maybe Mistress would let me check boxes soon. She had promised it tomorrow, after all. But I wouldn’t be at the cafe. I couldn’t show all the other florets how good I was at checking boxes! 

 

One of the other florets began to wrap their arms around me. He was a cute catboy with brown hair and cat ears and a cat tail. He was so short and he was so pretty and I just wanted to cuddle with him and snuggle with him forever. 

 

But it was lunch time. I found my bowl on my second try! I was getting so much better at reading! I triumphantly began to eat my food. It didn’t matter what was in there, but it was so tasty! 

 

Mistress was talking to Violet now. They were saying a bunch of weird things that I couldn’t understand. But I was going to eat the tasty little bacon bits and the biscuits! They were sooo yummy! Mmmmmm! There were so many of them, and my face was getting a little bit dirty. Where was Mistress to clean my face up? 

 

That didn’t matter. It was time to dive into a pillow pile! I crawled into it, hugging one of the cute plushies. The doggy was so cute! Just like how I wanted to be! A cute little puppy floret who got lots of scritches and headpats and cuddles and walks! 

 

I saw Mistress getting ready to pick me up, but Violet stopped her. She said a bunch more weird, kind of angry things and then grabbed me. Maybe it was something about rules? But Mistress said that the rules weren’t real! 

 

Why was she doing this? Why wasn’t Mistress going to take me back? Why wasn’t I going to check the boxes? 

 

But Violet began to pet me, and everything was okay again, and I was happy. 

 

I was back in my boring, dull apartment. There were no bright colors, and there were no interesting things to do, and there were no cute florets, and there were no Affini telling me how cute I was, and there were no plushies to cuddle with. I was sad. Where was Mistress? 

 

Where was she? 

 

“Mistress?” I asked, looking through my apartment as I crawled around the harsh tile floor. The tiles hurt my hands. There were no plushies. I couldn’t cuddle with anything. My skin was exposed, and not being cuddled felt wrong. I was still sad. 

 

I crawled into my old bedroom. So boring… I whined, a sad, abandoned floret. Why wasn’t Mistress going to come for me? Had I been a bad pet? Had Violet taken me away from her? Violet was so mean! Why did she take away the cuddles? Why couldn’t I be a cute, cuddly pet all the time? 

 

And then, after these thoughts coursing through my mind for a few more minutes,  I woke up. It didn’t take long to realize, through the fog, what had happened. My normal mind had finally started to run, though it was still having trouble thinking. 

 

It took a long time of thinking to figure out what the problem was. My neuro-thingies were being blocked in the smart part of my brain. I just needed to unblock the neuro-thingies, and I could run just fine. In hindsight, it was just a combined glutamine and GABA inhibitor, and I just had to make my cells overproduce the neurotransmitters for a few minutes, and flush out the drugged blood. Activating the right glands was easy. 

 

I did it. It took a while, and a lot of effort, but I did it. Thank the stars the class-J had an exceedingly simple antidote method; otherwise, I would’ve been trapped in that state for at least the rest of the day. 

 

I began to reflect on that week. At first, I’d had doubts; maybe this had been fun. Maybe being Alice’s floret was a good idea. Maybe being a pet felt good, and I wanted to stay a pet forever. 

 

But, then, I began to go through the memories. Just to make sure everything was neutral, and the drugs weren’t interfering with my judgment, I tried not to consider the emotions that I had felt during them, and instead just replay the experiences. 

 

I had been violated. Repeatedly, constantly, and deeply. Beyond the expected groping, Alice had taken an especially large interest in my ass. Most of my days there had been spent with at least one vine inside of it. It was rape. Sure, I had enthusiastically consented, but I was under the influence of a xenodrug. I was under the influence of a xenodrug she had given me because I had complained, because I didn’t like it. She had overridden my wishes; it didn’t matter that I had liked it at the time. Because, after I had time to process it, I felt nothing but disgust at the memory. 

 

Alice wasn’t any better than a sleazy guy trying to flip a lesbian’s sexuality with corrective rape. 

 

I had been robbed of my dignity. I had been kept naked the entire time, except for a pair of obnoxiously feminine high socks. I had been forced to eat and drink out of bowls, in such an uncivilized manner. I had been controlled by random Affini, who got me to do their bidding in exchange for random scraps of food. They had overfed me too, and I had gained quite a bit of excess fat from the whole thing. I began to forcibly burn it off; it was going to be a day or two before I’d be back to normal. 

 

I had been robbed of my independence. I’d completely relied on them for food and water. I was completely vulnerable. Anybody could do or withhold anything they wanted from me. The only thing that had stopped me from being domesticated was Violet. I owed her a massive thanks, probably. There was also a chance that she wanted to domesticate me… and my days were probably numbered in that case. 

 

I had been robbed of my humanity and my intelligence. I had been forced to walk on all fours like some sort of animal. I was left unable to form all but the most basic words. I had dog ears attached to me - quick plant-tech grafts that, luckily, was under my brain’s fine-grain control. 

 

I was lucky that they had done such a hasty job; all I needed to do was make my body heal the right way in order to get rid of it. I forced the blood vessels that supplied the plant-tech to form clots, disconnecting the ears from my bloodstream. I put the skin cells around the ears into overdrive. It wouldn’t be long before the rapidly progressing conveyor belt of skin would push the ears off my body. But, for now, muting their nerves would be enough. 

 

I was lucky that I didn’t have to resort to more… unorthodox methods for getting rid of these things. It was far easier to shed something than to numb your body and then cut into it, after all. But, regardless, the fact that they had forced me to adopt aspects of such a horrible, fearsome, demonic species was disgusting. I was afraid of dogs, and that was for a good reason. 

 

But the worst part was, I had been robbed of my ability to feel pain. That was, ironically, the most painful feeling of them all. I had been forced to like everything that they had done to me, and I hadn’t been able to even think about how horrible Alice had acted until now. The real me had been asleep, a little drugged-up lizard taking its place. A little happiness receptor that appreciated everything. That’s what I had been reduced to. 

 

My opinions were gone. My feelings and my thoughts were gone. I had truly been asleep that week. And, if I were to become Alice’s floret, I wouldn’t have ever truly woken up. 

 

What was that, if not death? What had I narrowly escaped, if not death? 

 

I thought about what had caused this hellish week. It was because I had complained to Alice, telling her that I didn’t like how she had been treating me. She had then decided that I’d needed some loosening up, and brought me to Hell. Because I wasn’t happy enough. 

 

The answer was obvious. In order to avoid death, I had to play dead. I had to pretend that the week at the cafe had fixed everything about me, and turned me into Alice’s ideal (non-floret) sophont. I had to pretend that every horrible, violating thing she’d done to me was enjoyable, and I had to be convincing. I had to show her that I didn’t need any more drugs. 

 

And, with a little bit of hope, meaningful work, a chance to help out, would be within my grasp. 

 

---

Present Day…

 

Rose was the cutest little floret. She had fought hard to stop herself from breaking. In fact, I’d had to use a little class-O in order to finally get her to realize what a good pet she was. 

 

She hadn’t been happy during that first month. Even after she broke, there was still something missing. She was lonely. Sure, I loved cuddling with her, but I knew she needed another cute little companion. And who better than her old friend, Vanessa? They were going to look so pretty together! I could dress them up in poofy dresses, and make them play with blocks together, color… they’d be so happy! Of course, Vanessa was an independent, so that would make things a little difficult, but I knew how wellness checks worked. They were basically yours if you wanted them. After all, making them want you was trivial if you could get a wardship over them. 

 

Rose was in a big poofy princess dress, playing with some random blocks the hab AI had given her while I caressed her. I could see her from almost every angle, a concentrated dose of cuteness soaking through my skinsight. There was a perfect smile on her face, her biorhythm pulsating with happiness. The implant allowed me to feel her at all times, regardless. But, of course, I would have to go soon. 

 

I slowly began to release her from my grip, letting her free. 

 

“Don go, Mistress!” she pleaded. 

 

“Don’t worry, Petal,” I replied, giving her a headpat and reassuring her, “Alice is going to take care of you while I’m gone. And I’m going to come back with a new friend!” Her face lit up. “Yay! Friends!” she exclaimed. Although she did prefer me to Alice, the prospect of getting a new friend was enough that she didn’t care. 

 

“Goodbye, Rose! You’re going to be a good girl, right?” She nodded in response. Finally, I was able to leave, walking out of the door to my hab just as Alice came in. Everything happened exactly on time. Even though we Affini lived forever, we never wanted to miss a moment of our existence; beautiful things, like florets, were always fleeting. 

 

---

 

The briefing was quick. The file that The Compact had kept on Vanessa was relatively sparse; after the first three months, she had apparently adjusted incredibly well to life in the Compact. However, those first three months were littered with problems. She hadn’t been a rebel, or considered herself a “free Terran,” but she did have a lot of bad things to say about how the Affini had treated her. A lot of objections, a lot of reports about being unsatisfied and unhappy. 

 

She had also refused any veterinary treatment whatsoever. Of course, this was her right, and the time for an annual checkup simply hadn’t come to pass yet, but that was quite problematic. Because of this, treatment for her unhappiness and dissatisfaction had to be administered covertly and remotely. She was prescribed a week of class-J in order to set her straight, show her how happy she could feel, and how happy the Affini could make her. In fact, Alice had been able to administer it. 

 

Alice had gushed about that week for quite awhile after it had happened - how she had gotten so close to domestication, how she could have done it if Violet hadn’t enforced the stupid rules, how cute Vanessa had looked with dog ears, and some time spent wondering how on earth she had gotten rid of them after the graft. 

 

And that had completely set her straight. After that, for six more months, she appreciated everything the Affini did to her, feeling completely happy and content most of the time. The things that had usually perturbed her had no effect on her anymore. She also had a reasonable social life outside of the workplace. 

 

However, after that, she had spontaneously quit the job, despite being incredibly satisfied there. After checking up on her, Violet reported nothing out of the ordinary; she had just experienced a revelation that work was no longer mandatory, and she wanted to pursue her real passions instead. 

 

Finally, a month after Rose had been domesticated, there was a stable wellness check request from a concerned Terran. Perhaps she wasn’t doing well after losing contact with her best friend. I knew that I could make it better. 

 

I rang the doorbell of the apartment. No response. Perhaps the doorbell is broken, or she was bad at hearing those kinds of frequencies. Some terrans were bad at hearing high-pitched noises, right? 

I knocked on the door. Hard. I almost couldn’t believe that it was her; she was so happy. She was a well-adjusted independent; she was happy. Why did she need a wellness check? What had happened? What was wrong with her brain? 

 

Of course, they had silly things like autonomy and control that most Terrans cared about, but that could be fixed. Didn’t they realize how happy florets were? Why wouldn’t they all want that? To be cute and happy and admired at all times, to have all their needs met… that was why I worked here. That was why I did this, after all… who could be happier than a floret? At times, I was jealous of them - who wouldn’t, after all - but I knew what my responsibilities were as an Affini. 

 

Still, it was troubling to have every terran I visit hate me. I knew that they just needed to be domesticated, and that would fix all of their problems, but I didn’t usually get to be the one who did that. I let that train of thought continue as I gave one final knock, my optimism about Vanessa fading. 

 

Maybe she wasn’t there. Maybe she knew about the checkup, and was up to some feralist nonsense. But feralists were supposed to be obviously mean, obviously sad, obviously disgusted by us - all things Vanessa wasn’t. They broke my heart. Didn’t they realize that we were just trying to help, to make everyone as happy as they could be? 

 

In this career, I’d seen the cutest little plans to try to hurt the Affini and the planet. Terrans with flamethrowers, thinking that we could just burn, Terrans straight up searching the Overnet for how to build a bomb, as if that wasn’t monitored, others still trying to breed local insects that hurt Terran plants - as if that would do anything to an Affini. 

 

But Vanessa, if she was doing anything, wasn’t that stupid. Looking at her fabrication history, nothing was obvious. Other than food, she had compiled a bunch of Terran medical textbooks for her special interests, a bunch of board games, and she had a weird fixation with gardening. She’d fabricated a bunch of potted plants. 

 

It definitely wasn’t anything that she could use to create a weapon. So, maybe she wasn’t doing anything, and she just wasn’t in her apartment. Maybe she had forgotten about the checkup. 

 

Well, I had to make sure. All it took was a tiny little vine extending under the door and onto the back of the doorknob. I had wasted a few minutes, but that was barely any time in the vast scheme of things. I was early anyway, maybe she was going to get back soon, even if she wasn’t there right now. That would be weird, wouldn’t it? 

 

I could see the entryway and the kitchen with my skinsight. Everything was spotless, featureless, and bland. But there was a note on the fridge. I immediately began to read it. 

 

“To Lily,” the note read. She probably didn’t know my name; it was a guess. And it was correct. Yes, it was the most popular humanized Affini name here, and no, I hadn’t known that when I had picked it. It was just so perfect! A popular Terran name, which also translated to the name of a common Terran flower - and a super pretty one, at that! What’s not to love about it? 

 

“I know that you’re trying to help, and that you think you’re doing good things. But you’re not.” Preposterous! It was finally obvious that Vanessa was a stupid, backwards feralist. She definitely needed to be domesticated, with that attitude. 

 

“What you weeds don’t understand is that not all Terrans feel fulfilled by happiness alone. There’s more to life than pleasure chemicals—Some of us get fulfillment by doing things ourselves. By having control of our lives. By having influence on the world. The things that only you have the privilege of doing.” 

 

I thought about this, and gave it some consideration. But it was so obviously wrong. Responsibility is a terrible burden, consigned to only us Affini. We need to make sure that nobody but us is weighed down with that kind of thing, so that everyone else can be as happy as they can be. And, if that means domesticating sophonts and making them value the right things, then that’s what we should do. 

 

I was going to crush that pesky need for responsibility, those delusions of independence and control over herself, and show her what it’s like to be in the place she deserves. And then, like everyone else, she was going to be happy. 

 

“And you will never understand us. You’re just going to keep trying to control us. And that’ll work for all of the soldiers. It’ll work for all of the trillionaires who want capitalism back. It’ll work for all the fools who think that they want this. It’ll work for beautiful, naive little feralists, who still entertain the delusion that you’re killable. But it won’t work for me.” 

 

I could feel the anger and spite in her writing, these wrong, feralist feelings that so obviously needed to be corrected, to finally let her live as the cute, happy floret that she was meant to be. I couldn’t believe it. Vanessa really was a feralist. 

 

“To hell with you and to hell with The Compact. I’m in complete control of my life, and I've finally won. You’ve taken everything away from me, but you will never take this,” the note read. And then she signed her name, making it completely clear how delusional she was, how wrong she was, how desperately she needed domestication. Oh, if I had known, I would’ve come so much sooner. But it wasn’t too late. 

Soon, her name would be Vanessa Cullen, Second Floret.