I had a dream with silver in it.
Maybe the point of the dream, is that if in other realities I can live a normal life, void of hell, those other lives can live them. I don't need such things.

Though I still wish I had him in my life forever, more than what it is right now.
Though what would be the point.
We'd just die. 
That is the existence. Whether you attain anything or not, the end is all the same.
I might as well just imagine the other possibilities that could have been, than live them.