285 AC

 

Great Sept of Baelor
King's Landing, Crownlands

Rhaegar Targaryen

"I am hers and she is mine"

"I am his and he is mine"

Looking at Cersei and Baelor get married, I cannot help but grit my teeth in anger, I was so certain that I had done everything to remove Lannister's presence in the capital that I let my guard down and I forgot that my edict had one tiny loophole, which Tywin made full use of.

I need to find a way to put this bitch in her place, according to what the little birds have told me, Jaime did visit Cersei today morning so that means that I have something to use on these two to finally put an end to their relationship.

I have to tell the rest of the Kingsguard and Elia about Jaime and Cersei and hopefully, we will nip this in the bud before it goes too far. I will not allow Joffrey to be conceived and also this might be amazing blackmail material against the two of them.

Jaime is alright, to be honest, but I need him to leave his sister like how he left her in the books, (not the show)

 

They kiss and we all applaud. Why are they doing this wedding in the Great Sept in King's Landing instead of the one in Lannisport or the Starry Sept,

Oh yes, it's because Tywin wants me to see this, he knows that I won't deign to visit either Oldtown or Lannisport so Tywin decided to rub it in my face by doing it at the Great Sept, the very place he got married to Joanna. He so clearly wants to show me that he will have a presence in my court no matter what I do.

 

To ensure that no Red Wedding will take place (not that it will but I am not risking it), I mandated a strict protocol on the number of guards a Lord can bring to King's Landing from now on, two hundred guards from the Queen's house, a hundred from the Hand, and fifty for each member of the Small Council and other visiting Great Lords are allowed only fifty men while their vassals are to be less than forty.

Of course, Doran has used this to have two hundred fifty guards in the capital and Tywin ensured that everyone from the West brought just the right amount but that's nothing compared to the five hundred Targaryen soldiers in the city along with the City Watch that I have expanded to three thousand.

"Looks like the Lannisters will remain at court for the foreseeable future, so much for all your plans" Elia whispers to me as we applaud the 'happy couple', "You don't need to remind me" I whisper back, Looks like it's time for the feast.

 

This feast is a lot like a Tudor feast, in addition to that I have brought in new foods to Westeros like Texas-style barbecue, rotisserie chicken, birria tacos, burgers, jerk chicken, a very primitive and improvised form of pizza which I have to improve upon, and of course, burritos, and a whole lot more, thank God for Dornish spices and merchants and Spice merchants from the East and all of their products and of course whatever I eat is taken as the fad of court.

Everyone will do anything to emulate me, I am a trendsetter, have to say in my old life that would have been inconceivable. But that's alright, it will be my first step in setting up a cult of personality around me.

Of course, the food that I am introducing is not the same as it was in my old life, I have had to improvise on several occasions on the food but it still tastes good, and in the end that is what matters, the taste.

And the same goes for clothes, anything that I wear is suddenly the thing that others will wear, so I decided to have fun by wearing different types of clothes every day to have fun with the nobles, my poor tailor and chamberlain are being hounded by the other nobles on what I will be wearing the next day, unfortunately for them, my choices in my wardrobe are done on the spot in the morning.

One of the things that I found in my wardrobe was a robe that looked suspiciously like the Hogwarts robes in the Harry Potter movies, so that got me thinking, I introduced something called Formal robes, which I will be wearing for important court sessions, black on the outside, red on the inside and the Targaryen sigil emblazoned on the left side, it has become quite popular with literally everyone maybe this will be my lasting contribution to Westeros.

Along with that, I brought in Dress Robes (also Harry Potter, see Yule Ball) which are to be worn during Weddings, Coronations, Balls, Masquerades, etc. Before I die, I will change the face of fashion in Westeros. Dress Robes are something that I am wearing right now along with ninety-five percent of all males around me. Hell, even Doran and Oberyn are wearing it as well as Tywin, now this is something to behold.

 

Cersei is staring at me and ignoring her husband, that bitch is still hung up on me, get a move on in life woman, the very fact that both Robert and I decided to fight a war over Lyanna (not counting other reasons) should be enough for her to understand, she ain't worth it. Poor Brightsmile/ Breakwind is sitting there right next to you trying to make conversation but she is just not bothering to even look at him.

Look at your husband woman, you just got married to him, I am desperately looking at my plate of ribs and sausages because I can't stand her.

Just then Elia whispers "Cersei is looking at you like you are a piece of meat, which reminds me, this brisket is nice"

I whisper back "Literally anyone with eyes can see that and thank you for complimenting the brisket" It took me a while before I made the perfect brisket and now it is a staple for literally everyone in court, hell once a week I have the leftover barbecue of the Red Keep distributed at the soup kitchens of King's Landing, and now everyone loves the weekend.

Of course, the City Watch doesn't like the increased duties to maintain order.

"Is she anything like Lyanna?" Elia asks me, Oh no not this again, Elia and I finally got back together and have begun to patch up our relationship, it won't be like before but it will still be better than what I had with her at first,

Our relationship was patched up with Rhaella's help, improved communication between us, and also a whole lot of duct tape. The duct tape of 'I need sex, you need sex, so let's have sex'

"She does have a body that makes every woman here jealous including me" Elia continues and she is right, Cersei is beautiful, too bad she is rotten on the inside, she is wearing a form-fitting crimson dress that is making every man here except her father, look at her in lust, I won't deny that I have been attracted to her but what keeps me grounded in reality is the fact that I know what kind of a nutcase she is.

"Lyanna's ass had its private zip code, Cersei's ass is more like a public service domain" I snark at her,

"What??!!" Elia hisses at me, I doubt she understood what I meant with private zip code but she must have definitely heard public service domain and must have pieced it together, and calling someone's ass a public service domain means slut/whore.

And going by what nonsense Cersei does in the books, this woman will open her legs for literally anything.

"Don't say such things in public" Elia whispers furiously at me looking around to see if anyone heard me, but I shrug "As if it is any different from when they will be talking about Aegon and Maekar" I retort and Elia looks pained at that and why wouldn't she be pained, I was bringing up a topic that we both now dread.

Aegon, Maekar, and Rhaenys are our pride and joy and the three of them have grown as thick as thieves and are quite the troublesome trio, however just when you think that life is hunky and dory, God pulls down his pants and takes a shit on your life.

Aegon is as sickly and frail as Elia, Damn you GRRM you didn't bother telling anything about Aegon's physical illnesses, then again he died by having his head smashed against the wall as a babe so no one cared about that.

His coughing fits and his fevers surfaced a few months ago and despite Qyburn's best attempts, he was unable to do anything as I believe that this is a genetic sickness, then again genetics in Westeros is weird-ass crazy, so can't be sure.

At best Qyburn could reduce the pain and slow its effects. Oberyn is helping as well but it's not getting any better.

Right now, Aegon is three years old while Maekar is two but if you place them together and look at them, it is pretty obvious that Maekar is by far healthier and bigger compared to Aegon despite being younger than him.

No doubt Aegon's martial prowess will be affected by that, under ordinary circumstances, this wouldn't be that big of a deal as we have had non-martial kings before but with Maekar being a legitimized bastard from another noblewoman who happens to be from a Great House, even a blind and deaf man can say that this is going to be a political nightmare which I am certain will blow up in my face.

Now in Maekar's case, I could rip out tongues because of them calling Maekar a bastard, and as Maekar is now legitimized, calling him otherwise is akin to treason but the same cannot be said about Aegon if people make fun of him or gossip about him being sickly, there is nothing that I can do about it without coming as tyrannical, sure in front of my face no one will dare say anything of the sort but with the Lannister's now coming to court, rumors will now start flying off the handle. I need to stop it right now,

"Elia, I need to tell you something," I tell her and she looks at me "What is it Rhaegar?" she asks and I reply "I know exactly how to put a stopper on Cersei's nonsense"

"Really how," She asks intrigued at my confidence on the matter, "Well it goes something like this-" I begin

 

A few weeks later

Red Keep, King's Landing

Jaime Lannister

I have to say that for once, my life is looking turning to be better, I had joined the Kingsguard with hopes and dreams but the Mad King destroyed them then and there and after that the next two years were horrendous, too say the least, but thankfully the past is gone and now the good days will be ahead, hopefully. Cersei is here and will be staying in King's Landing from now on, it just seems like everything is finally working out for me. Just like how Cersei and I intended.

Things have gotten better for everyone, the city no longer smells, the city as a whole is being transformed, Fleabottom is no longer the shit-filled slum it once was, and people are having better lives than ever before, just like how many people expected the Silver Prince's reign to be, although they didn't take into account that Rhaegar might be a little brutal, that's alright. If my father is anything to look at, a little bit of brutality is needed.

The roads are being built, made out of stone and gravel, sewers have been expanded, trade has increased and of course, the King now has his new army, including the Royal Guard which is due to enter service in a few months. As a whole life is looking good.

Whenever I see Baelor, I do feel a little bit of guilt but in the end, I need Cersei like how a drowning man needs air or the land. We are two bodies made of one and -

 

"Ser Jaime" I turn to see a guard approaching me, "You have been summoned by the King to the throne room"

Then he promptly leaves, I wonder why has he called me. My duty shift is in a few hours so I doubt that this has something to do with Kingsguard-related duties.

As I walk towards the throne room, I see that Cersei is approaching and oddly enough she is coming alone, Hell there are no guards in this place, Where did they all go?

"Cersei, why are you here?" I ask her and she shrugs "I don't know, I was summoned to the throne room by the King, and I was told to come alone"

Huh, That's weird, Why will Rhaegar call the two of us here all alone, then suddenly I get a sinking feeling "Cersei, Do you think that Rhaegar knows about us," I ask her

She scoffs "As if, Jaime we have kept it a secret, there is no way that Rhaegar knows about us" But I have a very strong feeling that Rhaegar knows and that is why he has called us here but before I can say anything, the doors open to the throne room and we enter.

 

Sure enough, just like I feared, the King is there, and Lady Forlorn is openly being brandished, while the remaining six members of the Kingsguard are standing by the sides, all of them have emotionless masks on, except for Benjen whose eye is twitching, along with them standing are Queen Elia and Ser Richard Lonmouth and Lord Jon Connington.

For a while, no one speaks and the tension is thick in the air until finally, Cersei speaks "Your grace, you called us here" and then Elia speaks in a tight tone "We have called the two of you here because we have something troubling to discuss"

Gods, they know about us, that is why they have called us, Jaime suddenly felt his heart beating louder,

Oh GODS THIS WAS A BAD IDEA, FATHER IS STILL IN THE CITY MAYBE WE CAN ESCAPE, NO WAIT THE KING ENSURED THAT FATHER BROUGHT A VERY SMALL NUMBER OF MEN, HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN ON THE WORKS, HOW LONG HAVE THEY KNOWN ABOUT US.

My heart starts beating faster and louder, I am pretty sure that everyone can hear my heart beating. My heart might as well jump out.

"What do you mean your grace? Because I am not sure that I understand" Cersei says in a sweet and innocent voice while I am sure that I am sweating like a pig but then Ser Oswell throws all tact out of the window "What we mean is that we know that the two of you are fucking, and we need to put an end to it"

He snarls at us and just like that everyone's mask comes out.

 

"Thank you for your tact, Ser Oswell" Ser Arthur calmly speaks and tries to calm Ser Oswell who wants to smash my head in with a Morningstar,

I wonder how I am going to die, will it be like Ser Lucamore the Lusty or Terrence Toyne or will this even come out or will they hush this up, and will my father even know about this or maybe right after they kill us, Rhaegar will attack father, before father even knows what's going on, he will be dead, knowing Rhaegar there is a very good chance this might happen.

Everyone is looking at me with undisguised hate, disgust, and fury, looks like is this how it ends for me. I wonder how many I will be able to take on before I am killed.

 

"How dare you make such filthy accusations against us, my father will hear about this" Cersei starts on a rant but Rhaegar shuts her up.

"Oh for fucks sake, just shut your hole will you" Rhaegar grouses, and then he descends from the throne with Lady Forlorn clanking on the steps with every step he takes, it giving a sense of foreboding, he stops in front of us and says

"I have known about the two of you for a real long time now, and when I say real long I mean since you both fucked after you came from the Kingswood brotherhood expedition" He looks at the two of us with a cruel glint in his eyes.

 

My heart stops, did he just say Kingswood brotherhood, Cersei also has a look of terror on her face but Rhaegar doesn't stop "I wasn't the only one, even my father knew about this"

WHAT?? DID HE JUST SAY HIS FATHER

 

I am struck dumb and my voice is gone but Cersei weakly says "Your father" Rhaegar gives an evil smirk "Yes my father, now whether he told your father about this, I do not know, and even if he did I doubt that he would have believed him but that is not what is important because I am giving you both a simple warning if you don't end your relationship right now then it will be the end of you both and your father won't even know a word about it because as far as anyone outside this room is concerned, the two of you have disappeared never to return after all the weekend barbecue needs meat"

I am going to faint right now but then Rhaegar turns towards Cersei, places Lady Forlorn on her cheek, and snarls "Listen to me carefully Cersei because I will say this just once, if I hear you spreading rumors about my children, you will not live to see the next sunrise"

Cersei visibly pales and trembles in front of him then he turns to me "I hope you are well aware of the story of Lucamore Strong and Terrence Toyne and trust me when I tell you this Jaime, that if you are caught next time, it may not be a person from this room but rather one outside this room and once that happens the Wall will be a luxury for you and your sister, well I'm sure the Silent Sisters will appreciate another member if your father is merciful"

I just wish that I just melt into the ground right now and die but then Rhaegar turns to Cersei and says something that surprises even the others and makes her go even more pale and horror-stricken "Cersei, I hope that you have enough common sense not to believe any nonsense that Maggy the frog tells you, now more than ever"

Cersei starts mumbling but Rhaegar cuts her off "You both may leave, but remember by tomorrow I want whatever it is between the two of you to end, otherwise, the two of you will be the meat in the barbecue given next weekend and no one will know the difference"

 

The two of us stumble out of the throne room and somehow we find ourselves in the Godswood. For a while, we sit in silence until I finally ask "Cersei, What did he mean when he said Maggy the frog?"