Though some... or rather, many, might call me an Involuntary Celibate, or Incel for short. Let it be known, I, Mechakucha Kuzu, am not one. Rather, I am voluntarily celibate. Simply no woman, alive or dead was fitting enough for my eyes to feast on. Or so I, who was standing on the side of the street waiting for the green light to appear, was thinking. Till the world saw it fit for me to be sent off to another one.

Bam!

Oh. Is this how it feels to skydive with a defective parachute? Ah. It stopped. Why is the world upside down? Why is there someone who wore an identical outfit to me laid down beside me? In such an odd position nonetheless. And why is he headless? Wait, no. Masaka! It can't be?! Oh well. The world seems to be going dark, my face feels kinda cold. Only my face though, how pe.cu..liar...

"Hello... hello.."

Aaaah, don't you love it, waking up in a familiar environment? The ultra-white ceiling of your bedroom, your ultra-white bedsheets, which also happens to be your ultra-white floor. Sitting up, I see an ultra-white emptiness extending infinitely. Ultra-white...ly. Wh- what? Nani kore? What is this? Where am I?! I don't remember living in Kizuna Ai's all-purpose-ultra-white room of infinity! Though, of course, I don't mind living with three ladies. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

"Hello there!" a disembodied voice said.

"General Kenobi!"... is what I immediately wanted to reply, but, remembering the wise teachings of the hundreds of Light Novels I read, "It's a trick, send no reply!" knowing that as soon as I speak, this guy's probably going to shove me in some world and the king who summoned me will ask me to go on some demon-slaying and/or monster-slaying quest and somewhere along that, the novel gets cancelled.  Knowing this, I did not respond.

After a few awkward minutes of both sides waiting for each other to respond like an NPC waiting for your reply in an RPG...

"Hmm... A communications disruption could only mean one thing. Invasion. But since I quite literally, see no Demon King in a thousand-kilometre radius, I can only assume thine art playing possum."

My LN training didn't work?!

"How unsociable! And here I was, thinking that I should grant thee some superpower as an apology for sending truck-kun to the wrong guy. If this is going to be the case, I might as well send thee away and be done with thou!"

Wait! What?! No!

"Though, hmmm, I suppose that would be rather rude of me. Here, how about thee reach thine hand into this pot and grab a superpower for thyself?"

After saying that, he grabs my hand and shoves it into something. While I'm glad he chose to be kind and give me a power anyway, my hand felt plenty of weird sensations. Hmmm, no, no no and... no. None of these feels good to me! First I felt dirt, water, fire and wind. Then some slimy... thing, another felt like what I imagined mana to feel like. And some others, like a spider, the hilt of a sword, an onsen, a... wait, why does this sort of feel like what I imagined an Am*zon search bar would feel?! And when did I ever imagine what an Am*zon search bar feels like? I have better things to do you know!

"Tok!"

After a while, my hand finally seems to have reached the bottom. Bumping on to a pleasantly cool but rough clay textured floor.

As soon as the Prequel quoting voice heard that sound, my hand starts ascending as if it were The Claw in some machine which some unfortunate soul decided to donate their money to. Wait... if he pulls it back up and I do not have something in my grasp, he would act like a man who has spent his life fortune trying to go for that Squ*rtle plushie and give up... and that would mean I probably would not get a second chance would I?! My forehead starts sweating and coldness flows down my back. I immediately try to grabbing something. Anything!

...

..Wh-

Why do I feel hair? No. Not the soft and silky kind everyone sees in G*tsby commercials. The kind many have. The kind down there. Yabai! Oh no! I do not want some stupid and disgusting power like Bob0bo-b* B*-bob*, and to make matters even worse. This ain't even nostril hair!

"Oh ho. How interesting, thou grabbed mine beard? Dost thee want me along for thine journey? Unfortunately, I'm not as stupid as that useless goddess. Here, how about this? I will give thee the power to communicate with me. Deal? Deal."

Wait, beard? Whew. Lucky! Washing my hands with bleach gives me mechakucha super dry skin. And did he just sneakily sign me up to some lame superpower while I was busy with deciding whether I needed my hands in a fantasy world?

And then, all of a sudden...

Poof.

Ouch...? Huh? No soft and smooth carpet nor the cool sensation of marble flooring? Feeling like I quite literally got kicked out of heaven, I slowly opened my eyes.