Emily and Chad sat at the dining room table, quietly sipping their coffee. Both were trying to come up with something to talk about; the weather, the Seahawks, anything to fill the silence and to avoid the elephant in the room. "So, Seattle's changed a bit since the last time I've been here," Chad said, cradling his mug. "A lot more monsters than I remember." "Uh, yeah, Krockman had a hand in that," Emily replied nervously. "It's kind of what happened to me." "Right, how does it feel anyway, being turned into another species?" Chad asked, curious about his exe's condition. "It's fine actually," Emily answered. "The creepiest part is how I'm use to all the changes by now, y'know with the tail and everything." 

Realizing he he could not ignore the issue anymore, Chad only shook his head and said, "Okay look, we both know what the problem is here, and I don't see any point in ignoring it any longer and neither can you I'm guessing." Knowing that this was true, Emily only lowered her cup and asked the question that had been plaguing her, "Why are you back here?" "Well I didn't exactly plan on coming back!" Chad shouted, somewhat offended. "Your psychotic boss sucker punched me and brought me here! By the way, how in the hell did you end up working for that guy to begin with?" "It wasn't by choice, I'll guarantee you that," Emily retorted. "So Krockman actually kidnapped you in broad daylight? Why?" Chad only shrugged his shoulders saying, "I don't know. He said something about my mind being anchored in the old reality or something." "Really?" Emily asked, intrigued by this revelation. "That's what he told me when I went to his home." 

As she said this, she heard a husky voice ask, "So what's the story here?" Turning around, Emily found herself confronted by the fat face of Tanooka Joe. "What the... who the hell is that?!" Chad asked, shocked by the fat man's sudden appearance. "Oh, sorry. This is Tanooka Joe. He's one of my coworkers," Emily explained. "I really haven't spend that much time with him though." "Right, thanks for the warm introduction," Joe said, reclining into his seat. "But seriously, how do you and this human tofu block know each other?" "Well we were dating for awhile until he got a job offer in Los Angles," Emily explained. "It's been a week since we've broken up." "Look, if it's any consolation, it was a dead end job, and that idiot boss of yours got me fired from it," Chad said, hoping to smooth things over. Emily only glared at him as she sipped from her coffee, clearly not pleased with her ex. Joe simply sat in his chair, eyes darting between the two before saying, "Ooooooookay... clearly, asking that was a mistake." 

Suddenly, a loud scream of pain issued from the other room. Turning around, Chad and Emily saw Chelsea walk into the room, shaking her hand off. "Uh, hey Chelsea. What's up?" Emily asked her roommate. "Your boss is a pig. That's what's up," the troll replied. "The guy barely knows me and he actually tried to hit on me like he's God's gift to women. Sure, I didn't mind when he said my ass looked nice, but that doesn't give him the right to assume I'd make out with him." "So you punched him in the face?" Chad asked. Looking back into the room, Chelsea replied, "Let's just say I hit him somewhere further south." At that moment, Krockman dragged himself into the room, pulling himself across the floor with one hand while holding his crotch with the other; his face twisted with pain. Looking down at the disheveled wreck of a man, Chelsea only replied, "Way further south." "Pain!!!" Krockman shouted in a falsetto voice. "So... much... pain." "Serves you right for hitting on me!" Chelsea retorted. Krockman only looked up and shouted, "It was a complement!" 

Looking down at his boss, Joe only shook his head, pulled out a flask, and gave it to him, saying, "You really need to curb your enthusiasm Krockman." Sipping from the flask, the emasculated lost soul only replied, "Don't hate me for being human. I know fine ass when I see it." Noticing that Chelsea was clenching her fist for a second punch, Emily asked, "Hey Krockman, shouldn't you guys be going?" "Oh crap! You're right!" Krockman said, gaining his second wind and getting back on his feet. "We got to be in Oregon in an hour!" "Well, you have fun in Oregon," Emily replied, flicking her tail. "Enjoy doing... whatever it is people do in Oregon." "First off, Oregon has a lot of roadside attractions, so that's something to do," Krockman said. "And second, you do realize that you're coming with me and Joe, right?" "Wait, what?" Emily asked, realizing what Krockman had said. "I can't just leave right now. I'm not even ready for long distance travel, and I can't just leave Chad here in my home." "Yeah, I can't exactly stay here," Chad chimed in. "I'm pretty certain I can't go back to Los Angles thanks to you. What the hell am I supposed to do?" 

Hearing this, Krockman rubbed his chin for a minute before answering, "Well, I suppose you could stay at Fort Hancock for the time being." The minute he said this, thunder emanated from outside, followed by a booming voice shouting, "Over my dead body!!!" In a flash of lightning, Misfit appeared before Krockman, his arms folded across his chest and a disapproving look on his face. Krockman only shook his head and asked, "Where the hell have you been this whole time?" "Well, Lana took me out for a tour of Seattle. It really is a lovely city, and Emily, your roommate is an extremely efficient guide," Misfit explained. "But that's besides the point. Krockman, did you actually invite this 'Chad' fellow to stay at the fort?" "Yeah, yeah, I get it. You're pissed about what I've said," Krockman replied. "But I think I can change your mind about it." Misfit only scoffed at this, saying, "Oh please! What could you possibly say that would convince me to let a mortal man live in Fort Hancock?" Without batting an eye, Krockman answered, "He's a freeter." 

When Misfit heard this, his eyes widened with surprise. "Are you serious?" Misfit asked. "Is he really a freeter?" Krockman only nodded in reply, his face splitting into a smile. Hearing this, Misfit began chuckling, asking, "Where exactly did you find him?" "That's the best part," Krockman replied, chuckling himself. "I kidnapped him!" At that point, both lost souls burst out into a fit of cackling laughter. "I'm confused. What exactly is so funny?" Chad asked. "And what exactly is a freeter?" "It's what you are my friend," Misfit answered between laughs. "A young adult whose unemployed, unmarried, and pursuing neither education nor training. We have a particular fascination with people like you." A little disturbed by this, Chad replied, "Uh, maybe I can find a hotel to stay at for the night, just until I can find a place to live and get my stuff fedexed back here." "Nonsense!" Misfit said, placing his hand on the young man's shoulder. "It's no imposition on us, and besides; you've so much to learn about life." With that, Misfit and Chad vanished in a puff of smoke. Before Emily could panic, Krockman placed a hand on her shoulder, saying, "He'll be fine. No need to worry. We have an appointment to keep." 

As they were leaving, Emily heard someone calling for her. Turning around, she saw that it was Krockman's butler, Tom. "Oh, hey Tom. What's up?" Emily said. "Uh... not much really," Tom replied nervously. "I just wanted to ask you something." "Sure thing. What is it?" Emily asked. Tom rubbed his arm nervously for a minute before answering, "I know we've only known each other for a few days, and I know your eye is back in town, but do you want to go out some time?" Hearing this, Emily was a little shocked. "Oh... well that's rather sweet of you to ask Tom," she said, trying to let the cait sith down gently. "But... um, could we talk about this when we get back? You know how Krockman gets when we're late." Looking disappointed, Tom only replied, "I see. Well... uh, yeah! I can wait 'til you get back." "Okay, thanks for being so understanding," Emily said, shaking Tom's hand. "I promise we'll talk about it when I get back." "And I promise I'll wait," Tom replied. With that, Emily left with Krockman and Tanooka Joe. As Tom watched, he sighed, saying to himself, "Yeah, I can wait. I've been waiting my whole life for someone like you." 
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In Little Wood, Oregon, a high school student was heading back home after school. Jenny Ulman was clutching her book bag, hating her life. It was a pretty average day really, but everything turned sour the minute she tried to ask Evan Pyrce (the coolest guy in school) out on a date. Of course, the keyword here being "tried", seeing as she chickened out at the last minute. This was because of one thing: she lacked confidence because she was fat. She was not morbidly obese or anything, but she was a lot plumper than any of the other girls at school (especially that bitch, Beverly Queen). She hated everything about her body. She hated how her belly and hips stuck out. She hated how her thighs rub against each other as she walked. She hated how she had the beginnings of a double chin. Pick any part of her and she would find a reason to hate it. 

As she walked into her house, she passed her mom, the thin, petite woman who was the bane of her existence. She could never really go to her for answers to her problems. The only answer she ever had for situations like this were, "Well, at least you have such a pretty face." Jenny was all too familiar with that answer, and she knew what it meant: she was fat. "God, I wish she'd just come out and say it instead of sugar coating it," Jenny thought to herself. "I know I'm big, and I don't need anyone patronizing me about it (especially her)." 

Making her way way to her room, Jenny sat herself on her bed, rubbing her face in frustration. "What is wrong with me?" she asked herself. "Why can't I just ask a guy out like a normal person? Why did I freeze up like that?" As she asked this, she heard a man reply, "I don't know. Low self esteem, fear of intimacy, just not interested in boys. There's just so many options." This was followed by a young woman scolding, "Krockman! Don't say that to her. She's probably going through a lot as it is." Looking up from the bed, Jenny saw three figures standing in her room. The first was a lanky, scruffy looking man in a trench coat, the second was a fat man dressed in an ill-fitting kimono with a long, raccoon-like tail poking from his backside, the last was a lizard-cat-like woman, lean and tall with a skinny tail looping around her legs. 

Startled by the strangers, Jenny screamed and threw her alarm clock at the group, shouting, "What the hell are you doing in my room you perverts?!" The clock nailed the lanky man between the eyes, causing him to scream in pain. "Gah! Fucking psycho! What the hell?!" The man screamed, holding his hands against his forehead. "Who are you!? What are you doing in my room!?" Jenny asked frantically. "Kid! Calm the hell down!" The man replied. "My name is Krockman, these are my associates, Emily and Tanooka Joe, and we came here to answer your job offer." Calming down, Jenny asked, "Job offer? You mean from that website? That was you?" "Yes! Thank you!" Krockman shouted. "God, why is it so hard to do business with people? It seems like I have to talk these nut cases down just to get anywhere." Emily only rolled her eyes and replied, "Maybe if you stopped breaking into people's houses, they'd be more welcoming." 

"Right then. Let's get started," Krockman said, clasping his hands together. "I read on the website that you're having issues with your body." Blushing a bit, Jenny answered, "Y-yeah, in case you haven't noticed, I'm a little fat." "Oh honey, you are not that fat," Krockman said in a sympathetic tone. "And even if you were, what's wrong with that? A little extra meat does a girl's body good." Looking at her boss, Emily retorted, "Krockman! You can't just say that to women, especially a teenager." "Yeah dude, I have to agree with Emily on this one," Joe added. "I mean you're not exactly impartial on the subject here. You are a bit of a chubby chaser." "Oh come on! I can be impartial! I do have a girlfriend you know!" Krockman retorted. "Seriously, you have a girlfriend?" Emily asked in disbelief. "Hey that idiot Chad had you as a girlfriend for awhile before he cocked that up. Is it really so hard to believe that I have a girlfriend?" As the two were arguing, Jenny interrupted, saying, "Uh, excuse me. You guys seem to be having some issues, but you did come here to help me, remember?" 

"Oh, right. Sorry about that," Krockman apologized. "Now then, whatever problem you may have, I can easily fix it... for a price of course." "Well, what do you take for payment?" Jenny asked. "That depends. What do you consider your most precious possession?" Krockman asked in reply, folding his arms over his chest. Thinking this over, Jenny got up from her bed, went over to her desk, and picked up a lava lamp. "It was a gift from my dad," Jenny explained. "He's often going from fort to fort across America doing training drills with the troops. He's always sending me souvenirs every now and then. The lava lamp was the first gift he sent me." Taking the lamp from Jenny, Krockman only looked it over, saying, "I feel a great amount of connection in this lamp. I will gladly help you." "Really? Oh thank you Mr. Krockman," Jenny thanked the lost soul. "So, what exactly are you going to do?" Looking up at the ceiling, Krockman asked, "Is there anyway to easily access the roof?" "What?" Jenny asked, somewhat confused. "Okay, you don't know, so I'm just going to do this the hard way," Krockman said with a sigh. Walking past the group towards the nearest window, Krockman opened it up and slipped out, clambering up to the rooftop. Looking out the window, Emily asked, "So, how long is he going to be up there?" "Depends on what he's doing up there," Joe answered. Looking out the window then looking back at her two guests, Jenny asked, "So do you guys wanna play some Overwatch?" "Ooh! I call Junkrat!" Joe shouted excitedly. 

As the three played Overwatch, Emily asked Joe, "So Krockman really has a girlfriend?" "Oh yeah," Joe replied. "Her name's Roquella. She's a lost soul just like Krockman and just as much of a nut as the K-man himself." "Right, and how does she feel about 'K-man' hitting on other girls, like say, my roommate?" Emily asked, narrowing her eyes into a glare. "Actually, she encourages it," Joe answered. "She let's him ogle women just as long he remembers to... shall we say, park it in the right garage." "You're kidding," Emily said in disbelief. Joe only shrugged his shoulders and said, "She really only agreed to the arrangement so she could still fantasize about having a three way with Martin Freeman and Benjamin Cumberthatch, but yeah, she gets a kick out of it." "Okay, that's a little disturbing," Emily said, slightly disgusted. 

"Speaking of unbelievable relationships, why did you turn down Tom's offer?" Joe asked. "How do you know about that?" Emily asked in reply. "I saw you turn him down when he tried to ask him out," Joe answered judgmentally. Looking over at the tanuki, Emily replied, "I did not turn him down. All I did was tell him we'd talk about it later." "Translation: you weren't going to talk to him," Joe said snarkily. "What's wrong with this Tom guy?" Jenny asked. "Is he a coworker or something, cause if he is, I can see why Emily wouldn't want to date him (y'know, cause of the company policies against that)." "Actually, Krockman's a lot more fluid with coworkers dating than most bosses would be," Joe replied. "He actually tried to fix us all up with girlfriends. Problem is that he's not that good of a matchmaker. I'm still single, Foxy K got fixed up with a girl before Krockman found out that he was gay, Misfit was already married and miserable, and Tom's match pretty much walked out on him on the first date because she thought he was boring." "Oh that's terrible, especially for Tom," Emily said, feeling sorry for the whole group. "Interesting, considering you turned him down," Joe retorted. "Seriously, what's keeping you from going out with..." That was when Joe realized something, saying, "Oh you can't be serious. You still have feelings for that idiot Chad? What is wrong with you? He left you for a dead end job." "Wait, what!?" Emily stammered, taken off guard by the tanooki's comment. "I-I don't feelings for... he doesn't mean any... we weren't..." 

As Emily was trying to come up with an answer, Krockman came back in through the window, proclaiming, "It is done!" "What's done?" Jenny asked. "What exactly have you been doing up there?" Smiling confidently, Krockman answered, "Go down stairs and see for yourself." Heading down stairs, Jenny saw that everything was the same. Her same mother was sitting at the same table in the same kitchen. "What am I looking at? Everything looks the same," Jenny said. Seeing this, Krockman said, "Huh, thought she would've been caught in the breeze. Ah well, better late than never." Before Jenny knew what happened, Krockman breathed out a gust of golden wind onto Jenny's mom, transforming her before her eyes. Jenny watched as her mother (the women who had never been over 120 lbs in her life) ballooned to 220 lbs, outweighing her daughter by thirty pounds. Jenny stared in shock at her newly fattened mom, her stomach pooling over her lap and her ass hanging over the edge of her chair. "What did you do to my mom?" Jenny asked Krockman in shock. "You saw what happened. Why don't you go talk to her?" Krockman said, hardly even caring. Figuring she had no other choice, Jenny went over to her mom to see how she was doing.

"Uh, mom?" Jenny asked curiously. "Are you alright?" Turning around to her daughter, Mrs. Ulman smiled, her face slightly rounder than it was a few minutes ago, saying, "Oh Jenny! How long have you been home? I thought you were out with your friends?" "Um, yeah, I kinda had a bad day," Jenny explained, finally feeling comfortable to talk to her mom about her problems. "You see, I was going to ask this guy out, but I chocked at the last minute." Hearing this, Jenny's mom held out her arms for an embrace, saying, "Oh honey, come here." Jenny hugged her mom, sinking in slightly into her body. "My god, its like hugging a mattress," Jenny thought to herself. "Feels kinda nice actually." "Look Jenny, you shouldn't be embarrassed just because you messed up with one guy," Mrs. Ulman explained, trying to comfort her daughter. "You have so much to offer. You're smart, you got a great personality, and you have such a pretty face." That last part stuck in Jenny's mind. "I have a pretty face?" Jenny thought to herself. "She's fatter than I am. Does she really mean it this time?" Looking up at her mom, Jenny asked, "Hey mom, do you mind if I go out and do some clothes shopping?" "Oh sure thing sweetie," Mrs. Ulman answered cheerfully. "Just be back before 10:00 okay?" With that, Jenny left the house, curious to see what the rest of the town was like. 

The minute she stepped out of the house, Jenny was in for the shock of her life. Every woman over sixteen as far as she could see was a hundred pounds heavier than she was before. "This is insane," Jenny said to herself. "Did Krockman do all of this?" As she walked down the street, she saw that every woman in town had changed. "Well, at least I won't be the fattest girl in school anymore," Jenny said to herself as she made her way to the mall. At the mall, Jenny made her way to the Banana Republic, only to be met with a plush saleswoman. "Welcome to Banana Republic!" the saleswoman said cheerfully. "My name is Cindy. How may I help you today?" "Uh yeah, I'm looking for some new clothes," Jenny answered, swearing she saw the woman before as wafer thin. "Wonderful! The petits are that way," Cindy said cheerfully, pointing at a stand of clothes that were clearly larger than petite. Seeing that they were big enough to fit her, Jenny said to herself, "Huh, apparently I'm petite in this world." After picking a few clothes, Jenny made her way to the changing room. 

In the changing room, Jenny looked herself over in her new clothes, her red hair draping her shoulder. "These are actually pretty cute," Jenny said to herself as she admired her new tank top. "Usually the clothes that can fit me are pretty ugly." Outside of her stall, she heard a familiar sounding woman say, "According to Krockman, those are clothes your size." Poking her head out of the stall, Jenny saw Emily leaning against the wall. "Emily? What are you doing here?" Jenny asked. "And where's Krockman and Joe? I'd like to ask him what he's done to the town." "Joe's waiting in a chair outside of the changing room, and Krockman's... changing right now," Emily explained. "As for what Krockman did to the town, he told me that he made it so bigger women were considered more attractive than skinny ones." "Well Krockman delivered. I don't think I've ever been considered petite before," Jenny said, feeling better about herself. "But when you said Krockman was changing, what exactly do you mean?" As she asked this, the door of the stall next to her's burst open. 

Out from the stall stepped a strange, pudgy woman dressed in an oversized trench coat and sporting a pixie cut hairstyle. The woman turned towards Jenny, a smile on her face, saying, "Well Jenny, how are you enjoying the world I made for you?" "Wait a minute... Krockman?" Jenny asked, realizing who this woman was. "Is that you?" "In this form, you will refer to me as Lady K," the woman answered, her voice having a tone of dominance. "But honestly, I'm just happy you can finally enjoy the world." Looking at Lady K, Jenny asked, "So is there a particular reason you wanted to be a woman?" "Let's face facts babe. Big women are queens in this town, and I want in on it," Lady K answered. "I thought it was because you never figured out how to mastrabate as a woman, and you wanted to keep from looking like a pervert," Emily retorted. Glaring at the young drok, K replied, "That's besides the point. Right now, we are going to live as queens!" Venturing out out of the changing room, the girl's saw Tanooka Joe sitting in a chair outside, smoking a cigarette. Noticing Lady K amongst them, Joe only shook his head, muttering, "Ah shit, Lady K's back." "That's no way to talk to a lady!" Lady K scowled. "Now go find us a table in the food court. I think it's getting close to tea time." As Emily and Jenny watched Joe lumber of, Jenny whispered, "Wow, Lady K's kind of a bitch." "She really is," Emily replied as they made their way towards the food court. 

At the food court, the three girls were sitting at their table, watching as Joe brought them four empty coffee cups. "Thank you Joe," K said. "Yeah, yeah, whatever," Joe replied dejectedly. Noticing the empty cups, Emily asked, "Shouldn't these be filled with coffee?" "Public coffee sucks," K replied disdainfully. "I only get these cups just to have something to pour my tea in." Before Emily could ask anything in reply, Lady K pulled a teapot out from her trench coat, placing it on the table. The teapot began glowing, transforming into a more humanoid shape. While Jenny was surprised by the sudden transformation, Emily recognized the creature as the teapot scrap from her first trip to Fort Hancock. "What the hell is that thing?" Jenny asked in shock. "This is Darje, one of my scraps," Lady K explained. "Say hello Darje." Darje looked towards the other two girls, holding out his hands and dribbling tea as he said, "Hullo. Pleased to meet you." Hearing the scrap talk disturbed Emily. "He can talk!?" Emily asked in shock. "Well of course he can talk," K replied. "He can also pour tea. Darje, be a lamb and pour some tea into the coffee cups." Following the woman's orders, Darje bent over, pouring tea from his spout into the coffee cups. Staring at the teapot scrap, Emily asked,"Seriously though, I thought scraps couldn't talk." "Well they can't talk at first," Lady K answered. "They're like children. They have to learn how to do things. Now are you going to drink your tea or what?" Looking worriedly at the tea, Jenny said, "I'm sorry, but I can't drink something that came out of a living thing, even if it used to be an ordinary teapot." "You drink milk from a live cow don't you? How's this any different?" K explained indifferently. "Why don't you try it before you pass judgement." Seeing that she had a point, the two girls decided to suck it up and tried the tea, silently enjoying it. 

As they were drinking their tea, Jenny recognized someone in the crowd. "Oh my god. It's her," Jenny said smiling. "Who?" Emily asked. "Beverly Queen: the queen bitch of Little Wood. And thanks to Lady K, the fattest cow in school." Looking over at the crowd, Emily and K saw Beverly. In place of the skinny bombshell Jenny once knew stood an enormous girl, her legs like tree trunks, her ass a shelf, her arms like meaty hams, her stomach laying on her lap as her chest jutted out a foot and a half. Her round face was framed by long, blonde hair. Staring at the girl, K said, "My god, she could smother someone with those boobs." "Yeah, well thanks to you, I finally have some overhead with her," Jenny said as she got up. "Time to rub it in her face." With that, Jenny left the table and made her way over to Beverly. 

Making her way to Beverly, Jenny thought to herself, "Oh man, this is going to be so good! I wonder what I should say to her? I mean she's thrown every insult possible at me. Better make it a good one." However, the minute Jenny made eye contact with her, Beverly shouted, "Well, well, if it isn't twiggy!" "I... what?" Jenny said, taken back by her bully's abruptness. "You heard me scrawny," Beverly replied smugly. "Seriously, why don't you eat something sometime?" Jenny was at a lost for words. Early that day, Beverly was fat shaming her, but now she was shaming her for being thin (well, thinner anyway). "Hey boney! You listening?" Beverly shouted as she pulled a burger out from her cleavage, pulling Jenny out of her train of thought. "It's cute you think you can catch up with me, but let's face facts. No guy is ever going to want you or that skinny ass of yours? Maybe if you didn't skip a few meals, you'd probably be the queen of boy town instead of the president of the Itty Bitty Titty Brigade." Biting into her burger, Beverly left, casting a smug glare towards Jenny. Feeling utterly defeated, Jenny returned to the table where Emily, Joe, and Lady K were waiting. 

Noticing Jenny being quiet, Emily asked, "Is something wrong?" "Why can't I win just once?" Jenny asked sullenly. "What do you mean?" Emily asked, somewhat confused. "Beforehand, I was unattractive because I was fat, and now I'm unattractive because I'm considered too thin!" Jenny shouted in frustration. "No matter what I do, I'm never going to be attractive! I'm never going to be able to ask Evan out, and I'm going to die alone!" Staring in shock, Emily said, "Oh wow. Uh K, maybe you could weigh in on this." Looking over at Lady K, Emily saw that she was staring at where Beverly was standing. "K!" Emily shouted, snapping Lady K out of her trance. Blinking her eyes a bit, K only wiped a bit of drool from the corner of her mouth, saying, "Uh, sorry about that. I got distracted when I saw Big Bev use her boobs as a burger caddy." "Oh come on, seriously! How are you more of a pervert as a lesbian than you were as a guy?" Joe shouted in anger. "Yeah, Jenny's having a rough time. Can't you be at least a little sympathetic?" Emily added. As the three were arguing, Jenny only lowered her head onto the table, wishing for the day to just end. 

Suddenly, a familiar voice said to Jenny, "Jenny? Is everything alright?" Looking up from the table, Jenny saw that Lady K and her entourage were gone, and in their place was Evan, his boyish good looks ever present as ever. "Evan? What are you doing here?" Jenny asked, surprised by Evan's arrival. "Some weird guy in a trench coat came by and said you were sitting alone in the food court," Evan explained. "At first, I thought he was some creep checking you out, but then he told me he was your cousin. He said some interesting things to say about you and me." "Oh god, what did he say?" Jenny asked, realizing who Evan was talking about. "He said that you had a bit of a crush on me," Evan explained with a smile. "He didn't say much after that though. Once he finished, he ran off to the nearest bathroom and locked the door. I think he might have had food poisoning or something." "Oh I'm pretty certain that's not it," Jenny muttered under her breath. "So was he right?" Evan asked. "You really want to go out with me?" Jenny blushed a bit, answering, "Well, yeah. I was actually going to ask you out earlier today, but I got nervous and chickened out at the last minute." "I don't know why you chickened out? I would've totally said yes," Evan said with a grin. "You mean you'd actually pick me over Beverly?" Jenny asked in shock. "Hey, I won't lie, you're both hot," Evan answered. "But all Beverly does is talk about herself. I want to be with someone I can actually talk to. That's what I like about you. You're beautiful and smart." Hearing this, Jenny only smiled, grabbed Evan by his hand and said, "So you want to go to the movies tonight, big boy?" As the new couple were talking, Krockman (now back to his male self) and his entourage were watching from the distance, admiring their work. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but you did good Krockman," Joe said begrudgingly. "Yeah Krockman, you actually did something nice for a change," Emily added. "Of course, you did spend the last ten minutes mastrabating, so it kind of evens out." Krockman only shrugged his shoulders, saying, "Eh, I do what I do. Now then, job's done, let's go home." Pausing for a moment, Emily looked towards Krockman, saying, "You do know that my roommate's going to kick your ass for hitting on her when we get back, right?" "Relax will you," Krockman replied. "I've got someone on it." With that, the group left, leaving Emily wondering what Krockman meant. 

Back in Seattle, Krockman, Joe, and Emily were just about to head back into Emily's apartment, when she asked, "Uh Krockman, when you said you got someone on it, what exactly did you mean?" "You'll see in a few minutes," Krockman said as he opened the door. Inside the apartment, Emily saw her roommates laughing and having tea with another woman. The woman was quite attractive, wearing a flannel shirt, jeans and glasses, her brown hair brushing her shoulders. "Hey Emily! Back from your trip already?" Lana said, waving her friend on to sit down. "We were just talking to Roquella here." "Roquella?" Emily asked, looking towards the mystery woman. The woman held out a hand to Emily, saying, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. Krockman's told me all kinds of things about you." "Ha has?" Emily asked suspiciously. "Oh yeah, just enough to make a profile for you," Roquella replied cheerfully. "Oh okay, that sounds... wait, did you just say profile?" Emily said, realizing what the lost soul had told her. "Yeah girl! Roquella's a matchmaker," Chelsea chimed in. "She already found me and Lana dates." "Well what can I say, it's a gift," Roquella said proudly. "It runs in the family. My mom used to call me a junior yenta. I can fix up anyone with their soulmate." 

Hearing this, Tanooka Joe only rolled his eyes and said, "What a load of crap! You still haven't found anyone for me yet!" Turning towards the tanuki, Roquella only smiled, saying, "Well, well, Tanooka Joe. Don't go thinking that I've forgotten about you." Walking over to Joe, Roquella pulled out a card and gave it to the tanuki, saying, "Now, I have a new maid back at my place, enjoys good scotch, spends her free time at the firing range, and she has a thing for big boys." Looking down at the card, Joe could only mutter, "Damn your good. Well I know what I'll be doing tomorrow night." With that, Joe vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving Krockman behind in the room. "And there's the man of the hour," Roquella said, embracing her boyfriend in a hug. "Hey Roqy. I take it you've been busy," Krockman said, pecking Roquella on the cheek. Pulling her boyfriend in, Roquella whispered, "By the look of things around here, you've been pretty busy yourself." 

As the two were hugging each other, Krockman felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning around to see Lolita holding a clipboard. "Uh Lolita, I'm kind of in the middle of something. Haven't seen my girlfriend in three days and stuff," Krockman said, somewhat annoyed. "Sorry to interrupt Mr. Krockman, but another appointment's come up," Lolita explained, showing Krockman the clipboard. "You're presence is needed immediately." Looking disgusted, Krockman shouted, "Seriously! I haven't been with my girlfriend for more than two minutes, and already some whiny prick needs me! Come on!" "Krockman, calm down," Roquella said, trying to soothe the lost soul. "If it's alright with you, I can come along and we can spend time together after the job's done." Sighing a bit, Krockman turned to Roquella and said, "Okay, if that's what you want, that's what we're going to do." Turning towards Emily, Krockman added, "Emily, you can sit this one out. Today, it's just me and my girl." Before they left, Emily asked, "Hold on a minute. Do either of you know where Tom is? I was going to talk to him..." "About the date you two are having tomorrow night?" Krockman interrupted. "Don't worry about it. I already told him about how you wanted to go out with him and that it'll be the time of your life. Okay bye!" And with that, Krockman and Roquella left, leaving Emily to wonder what the hell just happened. 

As Emily was trying to process what Krockman had done, Chelsea chimed in, saying, "You know, either Roquella is worse than we thought or Krockman's better than we thought, but I seriously can't figure out why they're a couple." "Yeah, she's smart, generous and sophisticated, and he's... well, a man child," Lana added. "Honestly, there are so many things I do not understand about that guy, but I can guarantee you this mu..." Emily started before noticing something on the ground. "What's this?" "Not sure," Lana said. "I think it fell out of Krockman's coat pocket." Picking it up, Emily saw that it was a deed of some sort. The girls read the deed and what they read shocked them: