cw: sexual stuff. th;dr in the comments

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It was dark by the time I left the Greater Oak. I almost got lost following the path back to campus, which only got darker as the trees closed in above me, swallowing me into their shadows. A few times I stumbled over the cracks in the pavement, but I barely cared. When I finally reached the dorm, I just wanted to collapse into bed and disappear.

I opened the door to the sound of a woman screaming, "Fuck me harder, daddy!"

"What the hell?" I said.

I heard frantic scrambling in the darkness. For a second I thought Nick had managed to convince Miel to come back with him after all — but then I realised that the graphic sexual noises hadn't stopped, and I could see the glow of a phone screen.

"Oh my god!" I yelled, "Are you... are you fucking serious?"

I had sworn again. But considering Nick was lying on the couch in front of me with his penis out, it seemed like the thing to do.

"Fuck!" said Nick, "Just,  just give me a second..."

 "This is my room!" I said shrilly, "This is my room. And you're just... just masturbating! In front of me!"

"That was the deal!" Nick protested. He had finally managed to turn off his phone, and was working at finagling his penis back into his sweatpants. "And it's my room too, alright? That's pretty much official now."

"God!" I buried my face in my hands, "You just... you're so loud! And you're always there! You're just always there, and you're so loud, and, and... you don't hide anything, do you!?"

That was it, really. It was just so unfair. I couldn't be myself, not while Nick was around. And meanwhile, here he was, blasting his porn at full volume, lying on my couch with his pants around his ankles, and his... his cock just sticking out for everyone to see.

"Dude, I fucking told you," said Nick, "My headphones broke."

"So I'll buy you new ones!" I said.

"Oh, sure, cause I wanna be in debt to you when I fucking jerk off," snarled Nick.

"Then do it in the shower!" I said, "Go do it in the bathroom! That's where I do it!"

"I can't do it in the shower!" Nick said, "I need my phone! What am I meant to jerk off too? The showerhead? Myself in the mirror?"

"Ew!" I said. I closed the door behind me, which in retrospect I probably should have done a lot earlier. "Don't be fucking obscene! And have you ever heard of using your imagination?"

"Oh, sure," Nick scoffed, "Because that's as good as actual porn."

"Right, because the stuff you watch is so groundbreaking," I slipped my voice into a higher register, mocking the breathy, gasping sounds of the women in the videos he watched, "Oh, fuck me harder! Oh my god, faster! Faster! Mm, your cock is so big!"

"Dude, stop," Nick muttered.

Ha. Good. Let him be uncomfortable for once.

I let go of the door handle and stepped towards him, continuing my act.

"What's wrong, baby? Don't you wanna fuck me?" I whined, "Please? My pussy's so wet, and I need your hard cock."

"Fuck," Nick growled, "Come on."

"Mmm, yeah, come for me, Nick," I purred, "Come all over me, baby."

"Nick, what the fuck," he muttered. I was close enough that I could see him glaring at me, that spark of hatred burning in his eyes. But there was something in his voice. It was strained. There was a tension there that I hadn't heard before.

I reached the couch, and placed my hands on its arm, leaning over towards Nick. He kept eye contact with me the whole time, eyebrows knotted in anger and... something else. A drop of sweat trickled down his brow.

My eyes slipped down.

Somehow, in all the time, Nick had only managed to bring his sweatpants up to his knees. His cock was still out, standing up, straight and tall.

I knew it would be big. I had seen the shape of it through his shorts enough times to know that. Besides, it only made sense that Nick's cock would take up space like the rest of him. in the dim light of the room, it looked thick, and dark, and almost angry. It glistened with a slick sheen of lube and sweat and... something else, too, I realised, because as I watched, Nick's cock seemed to pulse, and a drop of precum drolled out of the tip, running down his long, hard shaft.

I looked back up at Nick, and we locked eyes. He was breathing heavily, that same furious glare on his face. But he didn't say anything.

So I did.

"Stroke your cock, Nick," I breathed.

"What the fuck?" Nick hissed, but he sounded more curious than disgusted.

"You heard me," I said, more firmly this time, "Stroke your cock."

I wasn't sure if I was joking anymore. It didn't feel like it. Did I... did I really want him to do it?

Slowly, Nick let go of his waistband, letting his pants fall back down to his ankles. He reached his hand towards his cock, watching me suspiciously the whole time. My breath caught in my throat. Nick's fingers extended, and gingerly wrapped around his cock.

Slowly, with a soft, wet sound, he stroked it.

Schlik.

I let out a hot, ragged breath. Fuck. I did want it.

Nick let go of his cock. Without even thinking, I let out a little growl of disapproval, and he quickly took hold of it again, just behind the head, and gave it another stroke.

Schlik.

"Yeah," I whispered, "Do you like that?"

Wordlessly, Nick let go, dragged his fingers up his shaft, then took hold and pumped it again.

Schlik.

"Hey," I said, "I'm talking to you... slut. Do you like that?"

"Yeah," Nick breathed,

He let go, then pumped his cock again.

Schlik.

I frowned.

"Stop doing it like that," I said, "Why are you doing it like that? It's weird."

"Fuck off," Nick grunted, "It's... it's hard with someone watching."

"Aww, you're shy?" I mocked, "Up and down, moron. Longer strokes. Can't you even masturbate right?"

"Fuck you," Nick gritted his teeth, but he did what I said.

Schlik, schlik, schlik.

Fuck. I was breathing heavily now, in time with him. I liked this. I liked this a lot. And it wasn't just the sight of a guy playing with himself in front of me. It was being in control. For the past month, I felt like my life had been dictated by Nick's actions. But now, I was the one in charge.

"Play with the head," I directed him, "Play with the tip while you stroke it."

"Only got one hand," Nick muttered.

"No, I know," I said, "I mean, like, with your thumb."

Nick's eyebrows furrowed. He moved his hand to the head of his dick and started playing with it like a joystick.

I frowned, "No, idiot. Not like that."

"Well, what the fuck?" Nick said. He started tapping his thumb on the tip of his cock.

"No!" I whined, "Ugh! Just... just let me do it."

Nick gasped, "Fuck."

His eyes closed, and his hand slipped down and started working his shaft again.

"Ha," I smirked, "Yeah, that's right. Imagine that's my hand, baby."

"Fuuuuuuck," Nick moaned. He stroked faster and faster.

"Mm, yeah," I murmured, "Just like that. Just like it's me doing it."

Nick's eyes fluttered open.

"Fuck," he hissed, "Just do it."

My smile dropped, "What?"

"Take over," he said, "Make me cum."

For a second, I didn't say anything. I couldn't. I couldn't even think.

At last, I managed, "Really?"

Nick nodded slowly, "Yeah."

I stood up. I could feel Nick's eyes on me, but I didn't care. I kept mine focused on his dick.

This was it. This was my chance. All this time, he had stopped me from being able to experiment with my sexuality, and now he was giving me the perfect opportunity. Sure, he was a jerk. Sure, he had ruined my first semester of college. All that mattered right now was that he was hot, and male, and he had a dick.

I knelt down by his side. Nick's hard, straining cock was right in front of my face. It was still slick, and wet, and it glistened invitingly, like a jewel.

Nick moved his hand away. I took a deep breath, then reached forward and wrapped my fingers around it.

"Fuck," whispered Nick again.

"Shut up," I said quietly.

Nick opened his mouth to protest, but I squeezed his dick gently and he stopped.

It was so hard. I could feel it, swelling against my hand, almost like it was pushing back at me. Begging me to play with it. To tease it. To... to put it inside me. My heart pounded, and I realised that Nick's pulse, throbbing through his iron-hard cock, was matching mine.

I stroked him gently, then harder, faster, my hand flying up and down his slick shaft.

Schlik, schlik, schlik.

Nick moaned and fell back against the couch cushions. I grinned to myself. He wasn't giving me shit now. He was totally helpless.

"Yeah," I sighed, "That's right, slut. Just lie there and let me show you how it's done."

"Fffff," Nick struggled, "Fffuck y-you."

As my hand reached the head of his cock, I rubbed my thumb over his tip, then pulled back down. Pump, rub, pump, rub. It was easy. Nick was honestly a total moron for not getting it.

And it was working, too.

"Ahh," Nick gasped, "Oh my god. Ff. Fuck, that's... that's so good."

"Mmm, yeah," I smirked, "Moan for me."

"Mmmaaahh," Nick let out, clearly trying and failing to keep his composure.

I grinned wickedly, "Good boy."

"Yessss, bitch," he grunted, "Fucking... make me cum..."

I frowned, but kept doing what I was doing.

"Yess," Nick gasped, "Good boy."

Ew. What the fuck?

It felt like a block of ice had dropped into my stomach. I stopped stroking, leaving my hand loose around the base of Nick's cock. With my other hand, I smacked him on the arm.

"Ow!" he said, "What the fuck?"

"Don't call me that," I said.

"What? A bitch?"

"No!" I said, "I mean, yeah, that too. I'm in charge right now. You're the bitch."

"You're stroking my dick," Nick said, "How are you not the bitch?"

"You're the bitch," I said, "You cum when I say you cum. Bitch. And don't call me a good boy."

"What the fuck?" said Nick, "So you can say it, but I can't?"

I frowned, "Yeah."

"Why the fuck not?" he asked.

I didn't have an answer for that. Not one that I felt comfortable telling him, anyway. Maybe it was a trans thing. Maybe it was just a power thing. Maybe I just didn't like hearing him talk. All I knew was that it felt wrong.

"Hey," said Nick, "Why not?"

I leaned forward and licked the tip of his cock.

"Gah!" Nick jolted.

"Ah!" I pulled back, "Sorry! Bad?"

"No!" Nick said quickly, "Keep going. It's just... fuck."

"If you like it, why would you... ugh," I shook my head. It wasn't worth getting into an argument. Right now, of all times. Instead, I licked his cock again.

"Gahh," Nick's leg started to twitch.

I giggled, "Such a little bitch."

I dragged my tongue from the base of Nick's cock all the way up to the head. He panted desperately.

"Yeah, Nick," I drawled, "You like that, don't you? You wanna fuck my little mouth, don't you?"

"Fuck yes," Nick groaned.

"Yeah," I breathed, "Fuck my face, Nick. Force my head down on your fat cock."

I pulled his dick towards me roughly and kissed the end, swirling my tongue around his head. I felt like I was on fire. I was so hot, and my own dick was straining hard, harder than it had ever been before. I brought my other hand down and started rubbing through my pants, like a girl playing with her clit.

Nick put his hand on the back of my head, and before I could react, he pushed down, impaling my head onto his thick cock.

"Gluh!!"

My eyes shot open, and I pulled back, staring at Nick in shock. His dick wasn't quite out of my mouth. I could feel his head between my lips, drooling precum. Instinctively, I licked it up. It tasted... good.

I let Nick guide my head back down.

"Fuck yeah," Nick breathed, "Suck my cock. Suck my fucking cock, you spoiled little bitch.

I took his balls in my hand and squeezed them gently, reminding him that I was still in charge. But I bobbed my head faster. I kept rubbing myself, too. I was on the brink of an orgasm, I could feel it, and from the way that Nick's balls were tightening against his body, so was he.

"Fuck," Nick gasped, "Slow down, I'm gonna... I'm gonna..."

I sucked faster, letting the suction draw my cheeks inwards, forming a tight, velvet seal around Nick's shaft. He grunted and his grip tightened on my hair, pulling my head back a bit. The jolt of pain set me off, and I came.

"Mmmf!" I squealed, the sound muffled by Nick's cock filling my mouth.

"Holy shit, did you just—" Nick gasped, "Oh!!"

His dick pulsed, and a torrent of hot cum flooded into my mouth. I moaned, still rubbing out the last vestiges of my own climax. My heart was racing. I felt elated, not just from the sensation. I did it! I sucked a cock! I had a whole sexual experience with another man, and he came, and I came, and...

And it was Nick.

Nick and I looked at each other. The lustful expression on his face slowly faded into horror at what we had just done. My eyes widened and I spat Nick's cum out onto his chest.

'What the fuck?" he said.

"Oh my god!" I said. I could still feel taste the strong, musky flavour of Nick's cum in my mouth. I spat again. Nick scrambled into an upright position. The wet mixture of his cum and my saliva oozed down his chest.

"Fucking stop!" he said, "What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with YOU?" I yelled, "You... you face-fucked me! You forced me to suck you off!"

"You told me too!" Nick protested.

"Well, I..." I stuttered, "I... I don't know! I wasn't thinking straight!"

"What?" said Nick, "You weren't thinking straight? You came into my room, begged me to fuck you, and then... you fucking jerked me off! You started licking my cock!"

"Well!" I stood up, flustered, "Well! Okay! Technically, yes! But I... but..."

"Oh, what?" Nick said, "You're not so good, fucking, using your mouth, when it's not—"

"Oh my god," I turned and marched to the bathroom.

"—when it doesn't have my dick in it!" Nick finished.

I closed the door behind me. hard, and looked at myself in the mirror. My hair was a mess, and my eyes were still puffy and red from crying up at the Greater Oak. I washed my face, and after a second's thought, started to brush my teeth as well.

That was humiliating. I couldn't believe I had done that.

I couldn't stop myself grinning though. I had done that. And I liked it. I liked sucking dick.

For years I had fantasised about men, and then tried to shut those fantasies down. For ages I had convinced myself that it was just because I was inexperienced. Women scared me. But I was straight, really, and if I was ever in a real sexual situation with a guy, I would be disgusted, and it would be a huge mistake. But now I had actually done it, and it felt amazing. It felt right. I liked guys, for real, and I never had to worry or doubt it ever again, for the rest of my life. I knew.

...and I was disgusted, and it was a huge mistake. I glared at my reflection. That was just because it was Nick, though. Fucking Nick. The most important sexual experience I would ever have and I wasted it on a guy who fucking hated me.

Well, fuck him. I wouldn't let him ruin this for me. I liked guys. That was something to be proud of. For the second time that night, I spat out a mouthful of white liquid. Then I went back into the bedroom, ignoring the jerk on the couch, and climbed into bed and went to sleep.