Chapter 4.8
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The street was dark, the lamp lights on, illuminating the ground in a dim fashion; a handful of dysfunctional bulbs coupled with the state of disrepair that the road was in lended itself to creating a sombre sight before me.

The air was quiet, with not the whistle of wind nor the hum of an engine to be heard. Faintly, in the distance, echoing off the cramped walls of alleyways, you could hear cats, rodents, and what-not prancing about in their dance of life.

And then, as I was passing one of these numerous, innumerable, inconspicuous alleyways, I was grabbed. With a sudden, overwhelming force, my something wrapped around my arm and abruptly pulled me sideways, into the alley.

It was strong but precise; I wasn’t dragged off my feet but neither did I maintain complete balance either. My senses were thrown off as I felt dizzy from the sheer act of movements, which only further compounded upon the confusion I was feeling over the sight of… Nothing.

The alley was empty, except for me.

Wha-What’s there!

Fear slowly started to creep up my spine, my mind running rampant, reimagining the demons of the darkness that plagued my childish mind.

But then, a smooth, quick wave of sensibility washed over me--it was a calming touch in the ocean of chaos. I activated my System Specialisation, not sure if I’d find out anything useful, only to see a… Woman? It was hard to determine; the figure was dressed in all black clothes like they were trying to emulate a ninja, only their clothes were clearly identifiable casual and cheap in nature--I could’ve bought those things.

I deactivated my system after only a moment--now with the knowledge I might be dealing with another user here--as I wanted my full focus to be on my situation. I was in a dangerous situation that would demand my complete and total attention, or so I thought.

“I-I know you’re there!” I called out strongly, but not quite a shout, into the alleyway. “You’re dressed in all black; don’t think you can hide from me!” My voice was weak and wavering, the confidence I forcibly tried to inject superficial and easy to see through.

Still, it was the best that I could do; try to convince them their tricks meant nothing.

And, surprisingly, it worked.

Bleeding out of shadows, a form coalesced--whether that was due to a shadow spec or not, I couldn’t tell--which resembled the figure of that from my vision. Something I had not noticed, however, was the rather significant limp with which she was standing with.

“Don’t panic!” She--for I now felt fairly confident on her gender--spoke rapidly. “I’m not here to hurt you-” She raised her hands up in defence, trying to placate me.

As soon as I saw her, my bag whipped around my shoulder as I pulled out my handgun and aimed right at her, my arms shaking. It wasn’t loaded but that didn’t matter.

“State your purpose!” I gasped out. I was terrified, the fear reflecting itself in my tone. Nobody but a cat would be scared at my words.

Both my hands were on my, aimed right for her torso. Whether it was actually comforting for me, in this moment, I didn’t know. But I aimed at her.

“I just want to talk,” She got out quickly, missing breaths in trying to relay her intent as fast as possible. She seemed to realise the direness of this situation and was losing her cool as well; her tone resembled nothing like Luna’s when she was confident.

“Thens spheak,” I slurred out, unable to keep my emotions in check. My heart was pounding harder and harder in my chest, and my grip around my gun was loosening from the accumulating sweat in my hands.

“Don’t shoot me, don’t shoot me,” She fumbled about her words--I jerked my gun in response. “It’s about your debt,” She finally explained.

Debt? How does she know about that?

Needless to say, as soon as those words flopped out of her mouth like an incompetent fish, I was doubly suspicious.

“What debt?” Better to not confirm her information.

“Smyther’s,” Was all she replied with. It’s a vague answer but I was unable to hide the realisation from appearing in my eyes.

“How do you know?” I readjusted my grip, not as a threat but for my own sense of security. As long as it felt like I was in control, that was all I needed.

“I infiltrated their place yesterday--got attacked,” She lowered her head, as if to point towards her lame leg, “But I managed to find records of those who owed them something.”

“What does that have to do with me?” I focused my mind--no word would be unnecessary while I tried to get to the bottom of this.

“I need your help in wiping away the debt,” She finally explained her motive in this meeting.

Help? Has she already tried, and failed? If so…

“Why me? Why not someone else with a debt?” To say I completely believed her… That would not be correct. By nature, I was taking her at her word, but even so, suspicion ran deep in my mind; this way of meeting did not lend itself well to a trustworthy atmosphere.

“Not everyone who owes a debt is a user.”

“Surely there was someone else who was a user?” Holding up a gun for so long was taxing on my arms, and they started to slowly lower to an easier-to-maintain position. Still, though, the barrel was aimed right at her body.

“Maybe, but you were the only one I found that registered with the G.U.G.”

Fuck! I should've used an alias.

“And-And how would you wipe away the debt?” The strength that I had previously infused in my voice had drained away; my mind was too afflicted with worry over the ease of access of my information with the G.U.G.

“By burning the papers,” She paused, glancing at the gun in my hands, “And killing the guy at the top.” She drew out her words, hammering home the gravity of what she had just said.

Kill? Murder? She wants to murder the boss. To wipe away debt.

My legs grew shaky as I began to come to terms with those words.

She wants me to help to kill a person? Not a monster, a person.

Even though I kept looking at her, in her direction, I wasn't staring at her. My focus was elsewhere, distracted and fumbling around for anything more concrete than a semi-lucid thought in my head.

Truthfully, she could probably tell how out of it I was, but she didn’t do anything. She just stood there, completely visible, non-threatening, waiting for me to take this all in, to comprehend it all.

A minute passed, maybe two, in the silence that sufused the roads, permeating at the atmosphere with distilled tranquility, even as I was holding a gun.

It felt symbolic, in my hands.

I bought a gun and on the same day, I’m asked to kill someone.

Maybe it meant something? Was it fate? I didn’t even know if fate existed (if not, then what was my Specialisation?)

Finally, however, my mind returned to Earth, understanding that I needed to answer eventually.

“I… I can’t help you,” I stammered out, now not even looking at her but at my gun, suddenly less willing to pull the trigger than I was moments earlier. Whether it was loaded didn’t matter.

After a pause, she responded.

“I understand. I will you leave you a card to contact me in case you change your mind.”

And then, she vanished, just like that--disappearing into the air like she never existed in the first place. The only evidence of the conversation happening was my rattled mind and the mysterious, snow-white card that was left on the ground where she was standing.

Did she leave that just now? Truthfully, I didn’t know.

I collapsed to the ground as I picked up the card, utterly exhausted. My legs had quickly buckled under my weight and the burden of my conscience as I read what was written.

Brown. That was, presumably, what she called herself. The only other thing was a phone number. You could probably tell a lot from the number, like where she lived, but I didn’t have that information. I didn’t particularly care to find out, either.

I chucked the card into my bag, along with the gun, and shrugged it onto my shoulder as I got to my legs weakly. I was tired, and cold, and scared.

So, slowly, I trudged my way back to Luna’s place as I sent a text message to my grandparents, alerting them that I wouldn’t be home until school tomorrow.

Luna and none of the servants had settled in for the night yet, and she was all too happy at letting me stay over after I requested to do so--something that I had never done before.

She didn’t even ask me why, only that I was okay, after seeing me.

And so, I slept. And the next day came.

It was a school day, and that came with a whole heap of implications. An annoying one, being, that my clothes was stiff and smelly after having slept in them for two nights in a row. Thankfully, Luna graciously offered for me to borrow the clothes that she bought S2, seeing how they should fit me, and S2 was happy to be of help as well.

Admittedly, they weren’t exactly my style; they were a bit too colourful, too garish, and slightly too few layers than I was comfortable with. However, both Luna and S2 complimented me when I wore them, and I didn’t exactly have the leisure of being picky with my options, so I made do with what I had.

At least I’m not wearing a skirt.

As for taking a shower to clean myself up, as much as I wanted to do that, I wouldn’t have had enough time to make my way home and clean up in time for school. Luna offered to fetch some water to fill up buckets with so I could clean myself which, after thinking it over, I accepted.

It’s fine if I’m just a little late; it’s not like I’d miss anything important.

And so, for the first time, I experienced trying to scrub myself clean of grime and filth while not submerged in water nor under a stream of it.

Luna offered to help me out but after my vehemently refusal, I was left to do it all alone. I was concerned that it’d leave the warehouse with a wet floor but she assuaged that concern by explaining that they’d clean up while I was gone so it wasn’t an issue.

And then I was ready for school, half late but without a care about it.

Surprisingly, nobody cared much that I was late. Sure, there were questions where I was but they all seemed to accept that I had transportation issues--an unfortunately common reality with hives causing a whole host of unexpected problems--without question.

To say it was a normal school day apart from that fact, however, would not be the case. It didn’t take me long to realise that I hadn’t emptied my bag from the previous day.

I have a gun. The realisation hit me hard and fast, all of a sudden. As soon as the thought entered my head, I immediately, instinctually glanced about, checking to see if anyone was looking at me.

I knew, cognitively, that it was impossible for anyone to know that I was carrying a lethal weapon but, even so, there was a small part of me, a spark of concern and caution, that warned me to not be too careful.

Whenever someone talked to me, be it a teacher or a fellow student--as rare as the latter was anyway--half my mind was present, constantly analysing whether they knew anything.

Any minute, inconspicuous event was magnified in my mind. If I saw a teacher coming in my direction, or there was something that didn’t stick to routine, a thought sprouted up in my mind:

They know. And they’re coming for you.

It was stupid but I couldn’t stop myself. I felt terrible not long after arriving in school.

There was even this one time where a boy, who’s in every one of my classes, came up to me randomly--I don’t think I’d ever spoken to him before.

He asked why I was late in a sincere way, offering to help me out with anything that I had missed, implying it was valid for the full days I had missed previously.

It was an innocuous offer--a kind one, even--and I’m sure he was just trying to help, but I doubted him. Part of me felt like he was trying to trick me, trying to trap me; ‘Sure, just let me take my books out of my bag’ sort of thing.

And then they’d see the gun.

I hadn’t hidden it, and I kept books in my locker, mostly, anyway, so I wouldn’t be using my bag much, but I was nervous.

Thankfully, however, school came to an end. My nerves were frayed and I wanted nothing more than to lie down in peace.

As quickly as I was able to, I made sure I had my bag and my coat and made my way out of school promptly, rushing ahead before I got lost in the throng of students.

I walked briskly to the bus stop and only after the school vanished from sight did I finally relax, no longer worried every second of every minute.

I settled in for the half-hour journey, the bus partially empty due to the time, and succumbed to the comforting silence. All that I could hear was the reverberating engine throughout, placating my frazzled mind.

Then I was home. And I ate. Made excuses for lateness. Read. And slept. A routine of normalcy, something I hadn’t realised how much I missed. For once, I was beginning to wish all of this had never happened to me; I just wanted my normal life back.

Slumber quickly took over my conscious mind and with it, any regrets I was wallowing in as I opened up to a deep, deep sleep.

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