We ascended the stairs for what seemed like ages. Skeletons, zombies, humans, and all manner of undead creatures presented themselves to us, but all they did was cackle and bow in respect. It started to wear on my psyche. It was mostly just creepy, but shit the mix of creep and reverent disturbed the hell out of me.

I continued to call out for Dog or Effie. I was following the scent of Dog and from time to time we would stumble on an eaten bone. Dog must be fighting his way through the undead. That’s my boy!

“Casidhe, what do you know about the Corpse Maze? Have you ever stumbled on any documents about it in the Great Libraries?”

“You walked in here without knowing anything?! Of course, I know I am not an illiterate dumbass like some vampire I know… URGH”

I figured it was time for an attitude adjustment as I backhanded her into the maze wall. The undead immediately began grabbing and tearing at her. Unfortunately, this had the opposite of the desired effect. Casidhe looked to be in heaven, in her own messed up little masochistic world. She panted and squirmed as the countless hands groped and tore at her.

The undead hands eventually as disgusted as I was, threw her back out of the wall and into the pathway. She of course landed face down and ass up, but even with all of her curves, her creepy painting ruined the mood. She continued speaking and stood up.

“Th-th-thank you so much Master, had I know telling you how stupid you were would get this kind of reaction I would have belittled you much sooner you asshole."

“You are so kind and I am humbled by your intelligence and savvy, Casidhe.”

I smiled wickedly as I gave her the exact kind of response she did not want. I am normally quite averse to any kind of harm to women, but man alive she is creepy and she recovers quite well. I would never actually hurt her as much as I might want to. Ultimately though, she’s a fucking creep.

“Continue telling me about the maze Casidhe. NOW.”

"Fine, fine I guess we have to get along some if we are to travel together. The corpse Maze sprung up some 1500 years ago. The world treated it as a special Dungeon that surfaces from time to time and is filled with magical artifacts. Many adventurers entered only to never return once their screams were heard."

"That sounds pretty bad. Was it a Dungeon though? I seem to have some memories of Dungeons. They seem very familiar to me."

I didn’t have to rack my brains too hard. Vampir had an ample amount of information on actual Dungeons, but why I was intimate was a mystery. Either way, this was super fucking cool. As an RPG, there were dungeons full of monsters with treasures at the end of them. I had to make time to visit one with Dog and Leyara for sure, but maybe Casidhe. She was a valid resource. She just disgusted me.

"Well, as you know then, Dungeons are caused by great surges of mana under the world's mantle from the planet's Source. Each one is complete with monsters and treasures worth pursuing, however, the Corpse Maze was a bit different. It turns out that this was man-made.”

“Wait, someone made this Dungeon?! Is that even possible and why would they?”

"That is the mystery. We lost many lives discovering it was not powered by a Source like all other Dungeons, and instead, all the mana came from Someone’s Source. They had to have been on par with at least a Great Sage like yourself, but realistically, I think even you would struggle with the level of Mana required to keep this place going.”

“Gust.”

I blew some skeletons out of our way as I listened. I used the same spell that Casidhe used as it seemed more effective than bashing everything with my sheathed sword.

“The fact you can use High Magic on top of your others proves that you are one of the Great Sages, I just don’t understand why you are so insignificantly stupid even though you hold so much power.”

We had reached a new landing and the stairs ended and the path split into another 10 pathways like the beginning of the Corpse Maze. This time though, the path in the middle had an elaborate red door with spikes protruding from it reminiscent of the boss rooms from the beloved game about plumbers. There were sounds of battle coming from inside.

“Ron?!”

“Grrrr…Master I’m in here!”

I blasted the door off its hinges and uncovered what could only be described as the 'center' of the Corpse Maze. The room was massive and there was a raised platform with a wicked-looking throne and atop of that sat an enormous skeleton wearing full armor and a cruel black crown made of what looked like thorns. It rested it's a chin on its' fist looking bored.  Dog was in his battle form and fighting a never-ending horde of undead that poured from the walls.

“Hemiowgun.”

I cast a healing spell to help Dog out and assess the situation we were in. The skeleton on the throne’s eyes lit up at the cast of my spell. The hollow sockets of his eyes seemed to dance along with the falling stars. He waved a hand and additional hordes began falling out of the walls and surrounding us.

“Thanks, Master. These guys are surprisingly weak. I’ve managed to chew some pretty tasty bones so far. They aren’t beef bones, but they are something.”

Dog grinned from ear to ear as he gave me his 'report'. He had had a blast this whole time.

“Where is Effie?”

“She isn’t with you?”

“Nah, when the maze gobbled me up, I didn’t see Effie.”

“Gobbled?”

“Yeah there was this terrible sound and then the maze grabbed me and threw me inside. I’ve been eating bones and following your scent to here.”

“Casidhe, can you keep these guys off of us? Oh, Dog, this is Casidhe. She is the creep who summoned me before remember?”

“She doesn’t look near as gross as you said.”

Casidhe began panting hard and her cheeks flushed at Dog’s comment. A moan escaped her lips at being belittled.
“Never mind, she’s gross.”

“Told you.”

“Wait. Followed my scent h..!”

Our back and forth was cut off as we were rushed by a horde of monsters. Zombies lobbed body parts and skeletons swung swords, but if I wasn’t mistaken, they were only targeting Casidhe and Dog. They would run at me, but then right before impact they would change course and head towards one of the other two.

"Surely, I don't smell those bad guys."

I said it jokingly, but everything stopped all at once and all of the undead took a knee. The skeleton on the throne stood up letting me get my first real look at him. He was every bit of 8 feet tall and the massive jewel-encrusted bastard sword waved lazily through the air. He spoke in a booming voice that was also kind of like sand over the paper.

“They are avoiding and bowing in respect to you, the Undead Lord.”

“Lord? I thought I was the Undead King.”

"Not quite, you were until you created this place and dubbed me the Undead King to protect the list of treasures."

“Wait, I did all of this?”

"Yes. I wasn't sure but then you used your magic and I knew right away."

“Then why didn’t you stop everyone then? These two are with me.”

“Well, you were the Undead King. Now I am. I do not wish to relinquish my throne, even for my creator. I am made of your very Source, but I think you will find me impossible to control or defeat.”

“Ooohhhh, I get it. I created you and now in a futile effort for independence you are rising against your undead papa."

The Undead King then teleported and backhanded me in the blink of an eye. I realized fully what he said as I flew through the air and into the wall. My body began healing as I stood. I wiped the blood off of my mouth.

“FUTILE?! You may have been the one who created me, but it is I who has the power to control this place. You intended to just make me and guard your precious little list, but over time I have perfected your powers, no, MY POWER!”

“Raze.”

With a wave of his hand, the entire maze was set on fire with my spell! Well shit, this isn’t going well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Name: Vampir Darkness - (Shawn Mullins)

Date of Birth: Reign 23rd 3015

Title: Undead Lord

Race: Vampire (Human)

Hair: Black

Eyes: Red (Evil Glow)

Current value: 239.9 million Gold Coins, Approx. 149 trillion Gold Coins worth of Invisibility Potion, Resurrection Token

Magic Pocket: Pretty much one of everything (semi-verified), Journal of a Lunatic, Bottomless Bottle of Ron’s Piss, Large collection of Magic Tomes and some childhood photos

Powers: Voice Mesmer, Animal Transmutation, Super Strength, Mach 3 Speed, Immunity, Kinesis (Psycho), Regeneration

Magic: Derbegun (Cleaning Spell), Hemiowgun (Healing Spell), Stop (Time Spell), Dauntlet (Shadow Armor), Raze (Sea of Fire), Folioran Magic, High Magic

Weaknesses: The Sun, Holy Water, Dog, Cries Blood, Leyara, Grave Box at Witch’s, Shit Memory, Not very funny, Still has a Lack of Patience for Bullshit, Creepy Skeleton Laughter, Hedge Mazes

Strengths: Barfights, takes arrows to the chest like a champ, Digging Holes, Fungus House Demolition, Blood Rage, Sword Fighting, Can Cast All Magic, Gravel Throwing, Casidhe