After I finished talking with Jessie it was getting darker. I got her number and went straight home. As I returned back I passed by Annie and immediately went to my room. Now that I remember, Greg was working on Saturdays so I could hide in my room because Annie won't bother me if I said that I was tired.
Even if Jessie helped me and I decided to change I still was angered by the actions of this pair. After all, it was hard to change yourself, and this was definitely not because my cheeks looked like two apples after Jessie slapped me.
If only I was smarter and stronger in real life, maybe I would've done everything differently. Maybe it was my weakness that caused me to panic because I had a choice to stay here from the begging. But instead of thinking about what I can do and can't, I tried to hide in my shell.
So what if I'm trapped here? This was an opportunity to live another life, not a deceptive VR game, but real life. And I was probably the only one who can experience it.
I was in my senior years of college, yet I acted like a toddler, throwing a tantrum when I met a setback.
I locked my door and threw my clothes on the floor. I plunged into my bed.
"I need to clear my mind from this."
I tossed and turned in the bed for almost an hour. Still, I just couldn't sleep. It was earlier than usual but I was feeling tired and my stomach still hurt a lot. I thought that I would fall asleep immediately yet my brain refused to abide by my command.
I rarely had any dreams, usually, I just closed my eyes, and then before I could remember anything it would be morning, and I would feel refreshed.
As a side effect when I couldn’t fall asleep fast I was thinking of different things and in most times my train of thoughts would be just as chaotic as it can get. I was hunted by a never-ending stream of thoughts.
And right now this world did just that. It was almost like it was mocking me, denying me from obtaining even this small repose.
Right now, I was thinking about everything that happened, the "fight", friends of this body, no, I decided that I would change. So was it my friends? Then should I help them? Even if this wasn't a game world I still could guess what troubles they had.
After feeling like I was falling down I opened my eyes.
A black room around me. I wanted to check the time but soon realized that it was not my room. I felt muddleheaded, am I dreaming? Before I couldn't stop my mind, but right now every thought was fleeing from my mind like rats leaving a sinking ship.
I saw a small light, seeping through cracks in the wall. Groggily standing up I went closer to the light. It was probably a door as I found a handle and opened it.
I squinted my eyes, bright neon-like lights blinded me. After getting used to the light I once again opened my eyes.
Before me, there was a long tunnel, with the floor filled with the fog. I looked around but I couldn't notice where was the source of the light. I made a few steps forward. The walls of the tunnel. They were made...from what? Was it glass? Or a mirror? I couldn't think straight in this ephemeral place.
Turning around I saw the room from where I came. Cramped dark space, with nothing in it, and a door that looked like the tunnel from the outer side. But the inner side was like the room. So dark, it felt like this door absorbed the light I that were spilling from out of nowhere.
"..om…ere…"
A woman's whisper.
I couldn't make any sense from what she said. Closing the door I left the room behind.
I went forward.
After an unknown amount of time, I once again felt like falling and in the next second the tunnel changed.
There were now people behind the frosted glass that functioned as walls. The light was pulsating creating a stroboscopic effect.
Women and men were moving here and there.
Some were dancing, some were arguing, some were crying. They did whatever they wanted. As the light pulsated they were changing their positions constantly.
When did this barely tangible music appear? A bizarre intermingling of club music and an opera performed by a woman, it was here from the beginning.
I heard people talking, their voices blending into white noise.
And the woman from before, she was the only one I heard.
Constantly giggling and humming.
She was the one who sang.
A sensual voice.
"…ere…hehehe…"
My legs went by themselves.
"Hmmm…hmmm…huhuhu…"
The voices started decomposing into something.
"…fo…ou..!"
"…as…y…ault…"
"I…ou…?"
I was walking through a never-ending tunnel of people.
Were they talking to me?
"I...wo…et…y…o… haaa."
Once again this woman.
I was attracted to this voice.
The music hypnotized me.
"Com…ere…"
Her voice grew more focused and recognizable.
"Here child…ahaha."
Was this door here from the beginning?
Big white door right in front of me. I reached out to it.
Turn around? I felt someone gently turning my head back to the door.
"Don't turn away."
I opened it.
"There's no turning back."
Blinding light.
"Hhnnnghaaa." I woke up from the dream.
"Was I dreaming?"
I didn't notice when I fell asleep. It was always like this when I went to bed.
I rubbed my eyes and after they grew accustomed to the darkness I found my phone. I checked the time, it was the middle of the night.
"Ugh." as I stretched I felt the pain from my stomach.
Using my phone as a flashlight I went to the toilet and noticed that Greg has returned.
After relieving myself I went to the kitchen to brew some tea. My throat was completely parched.
Somehow I was feeling relaxed, I felt like a huge stone was lifted from my shoulders. I suppose it was a good choice to go to bed early. As for the dream, I've already forgotten it. Usually, I couldn't remember them for more than a few minutes after getting up and this time was no exception.
After gulping down a cup of a lightly brewed tea and moistening my throat I decided to go back to sleep.
"Oh, the phone is low on the battery, I should charge it up."
After doing some small miscellaneous stuff I went back to sleep.
As I entered the dreamland once again, I swear I heard a woman's voice.
"You are mine now."
Man this guy really can't catch a break. Now he's even got a yandere woman trying to keep him in the astral plane.
Did he get tricked by a demon into this alternate reality? No, perhaps some woman from his world hypnotized him into accepting being in this one for good while he was in a coma before entering it as well as a different person? Either way, what a scary chick. Yikes
Lol,kind of dont get what happened but seems good
I don't think it's right to explain the plot, but at the moment, I don't have another choice as I lack the skills to convey the idea behind properly. I tried to show how a person feels while dreaming. Maybe I achieved my goal if you didn't understand what happened.) The protagonist can't think inside the dream. With no control over his actions, he just abides by what his subconsciousness tells him. And all of this happens as someone else messed with it.
@SailusGebel you had asked us to give our judgment on your writing, and this chapter on the dream was very good, really very similar to when I dream, I can feel it, I can sculpt it, but I can't think, but everything I do is automatic , and things come up completely random. Sometimes when I realize it's a dream, I can't change much, the more I want to change, but the dream breaks, and when I wake up, I still feel a strange feeling about the dream, but when I get out of bed, I forgot all. it was very well written, but you could put more random things, the more confused and random it is, the better the description of the dream will be.
@Shoto i agree, maybe a fly that talks?
@Shoto I can't agree more with what you said, however, this isn't about an ordinary dream. I needed to retain the fact that he is guided. This dream tightly connected to his transmigration. It is also acting as a metaphor, showing that he left his previous life and moved on. Quite an obvious one if you ask me, that's where I needed to be more skilled, to make it more subtle. I also tried to do what you said. To add something more while keeping the balance of weirdness and guidance, but I couldn't think of anything more. And this is where my lack of skill comes into the light once again. Maybe, after getting enough experience, I would rewrite this chapter. Saving the structure but improving the actual text.
@SailusGebel you can put random things that have changed, without the MC himself noticing, at least for a while. For example, he walks through a desert, looks to admire the lake with crystalline and cold waters, then continues to climb the mountain, then he realizes that there is a crater in front of him with bubbling larvae. All this walking a few steps.
@SailusGebel It would have helped if you put Andrew somewhere near the start of the dream as mc walked away from him toward the white door.
@Lxlgn It would've probably been way too obvious. I think the whole metaphor I tried to show is already obvious enough. I must find strength in me to rewrite this chapter. It is the only thing that would help to fix it.