Though I wasn't able to open the sealed drawer and see what was inside, I didn't let that stop me from giving myself a mental pat on the back. Sure, all I did was poke around in the room for a little while and pull open some drawers, but it was a start. For all I could've known it might have been something as trivial as the Princess's diary or her favorite piece of jewelry that was inside, but that didn't matter in my eyes. Whatever the case was, it was a start. It felt like I had finally taken my first step. Not just in terms of my investigation, but as a whole. I had disrupted the flow I was trapped in since arriving in the world of demons and starting my own. The only thing that was inflating more than the pride rising up in me was my determination. I was going to get that drawer open no matter what.

 

"But for now..."

I paused from eyeing the drawer and strolled over to my bed. I sat down and lightly nipped on the nail of my thumb, a habit that had seemed to follow me from the world I used to reside in whenever I was thinking of something intensely.

 

" Is there anything that happened in these past two days that seem odd? Something that could act as a clue?”

 

Well, by definition, every single thing that had happened to me today and the day before certainly wouldn't be considered normal but aside from that, I attempted to reflect on events that stood out to me, even amongst all the strangeness.

 

After twirling the ends of my hair and some nail-biting, I could only recall four incidents that seemed strange. One of them being my newfound fear of going to the doctor's.

I was never afraid of visiting the doctor's office in the past world I was in. Even when I turned into a full game addict and quit my regular check-ups, whenever I felt as if a sickness was coming on to me, I had no problem scheduling an appointment and making the trip though I would try to avoid going if I could. Now however, whenever I think about Doctor Tera or the Clinic, I get shivers down my spine. It didn't make sense.

 

The second occurrence was learning about my dried-out mana circuits. However, I already decided that they were a problem in itself. Plus, I already dwelled on that topic long enough in the dining hall. I couldn't look into it anymore without any new information. Anymore thinking on it would've made my head hurt anyway.

 

Now third and fourth incidents were the ones that had my full attention. The third being earlier today, when I first saw Akano. Along with the calming sensation she gave me, I felt as if I could tell her anything. By simply looking at her, I knew we had a deep relationship and that she'd do anything for me and I, the same, despite the fact I've only been with her for a couple of hours.

 

And the fourth, the one that overshadowed them all, was when I first saw the painting of the Princess's mother, the Queen. No words could accurately convey what I felt when I locked eyes with it. It was a blender of emotions. Sadness, regret, suffering, and pain doesn't even scratch the surface of it but to sum it all up, it hurt. Badly. Taking all of those feelings in unexpectedly, It's no wonder why it brought me tears.

 

Taking all of these into consideration, it was safe to assume that not only did I wake up as the Princess, but I also consumed her feelings; her relationships with her family and the way she feels about certain subjects. That would explain why I'm fond of the King, the Royal Maids, and Akano, and why I don't particularly enjoy being around Doctor Tera.

 

Even with that being the case, there was something that still wasn't making sense. That being, my hazy memory. I could recall everything from the world I was previously in but when it came to this world, almost all the memories were blurred until something triggered the memory to reveal itself. I can take yesterday when Elvira's name popped into my head when she came bursting through my room when I fell as proof of this. However, it seemed like I couldn’t trigger any memories myself, and that an outside force has to ignite it instead. No matter how hard I tried to think of past events that happened to the Princess before I awoke in her body, nothing but a blank slate returned.

 

" If I need something to trigger my memories, then I'm going to have to go there...."

 

With a sigh and cursing my terrible sense of recollection, I rose from the edge of the bed and trudged towards the door of my room. I was still riding on my increased determination but I really didn't want to go there. I didn't want to feel that dreadful feeling again but at the same time, I knew that if I wanted to continue and gain some traction, I was going to have to suck it up and face it head-on.

Reluctantly, I opened the door and stepped out into the hallway with one destination in mind: the Queen's room.

------------------------------------------------------------------- 

At first, I thought about tip-toeing and trying to avoid being seen, but then I realized that if I did, it would probably bring more suspicion onto me for the very reason that no one sneaks around a house that they live in which in my case, is an enormous castle straight from a fairytale book.

 

Eventually, I made it toward the spiral staircase that connects the second floor to the first and third. I doubted that the Queen's room would be on the first floor so I trusted my judgment and headed upwards.

 

The décor of the third floor was detailed the same exact way as the first and the second, dark purple walls with violet tinted flames supported by wax sticks attached to it. However, this was uncharted territory for me. I had no clue where the Queen used to reside. But I took a guess for who might've.

 

"Alright Princess, lead the way."

 

Considering how strong the Princess felt about the Queen, it wouldn't be a long shot to infer she made more than enough trips to her room than her body needed to remember the way.

 

And so, I began. I started down the hallway, trusting and listening to myself, going in whichever direction I felt was correct.

 

" Maybe a left here?"

 

I made the left and continued walking.

 

"Right?"

 

I took the right turn and carried on.

 

I knew this was a gamble and I could've potentially gotten myself lost but I couldn't think of anything else to go off of. I was the only guide I had.

 

The guessing game went on for about a couple of minutes and I started to lose hope until I felt something stirring in my chest. I immediately knew I was getting close, for better or worse. I continued and with each turn I took, the tingling in my chest surged. In time, I was at the point where I had to stop after every couple of seconds and take a break to ease myself. If I had a panic attack just by looking at a portrait of the Queen, there's no telling what would happen when I actually arrived at her room. And this time, Elvira wouldn't be here to calm me down.

 

Following one final left turn, I arrived in a hallway with two large matte purple doors at the end of it. The dreadful feeling in my chest was off the charts. Without a doubt, I had arrived at my destination.

 

Gripping my chest with my right hand and pressing my left upon the wall, I slowly advanced towards the two doors, not forgetting to remind myself to breathe. After what seemed like forever, the doors that seemed so far away was within arm’s reach.

"Here goes nothing."

 

Ignoring my sweaty palms, I reached towards the black circular door handles of the arched doors, bracing myself for whatever came.

 

Still, no matter how much I prepared myself, it wouldn't even come close to preventing what came next.

 

As soon as the surface of my hands felt the door handles, not even before I could fully grasp them, a sharp pain stemming from my head induced. It felt as if somebody just grabbed a stick and was constantly jabbing at my brain, harder and harder. Through the pain, I realized that my brain was subconsciously hard at work trying to retrieve a memory, but nevertheless, it couldn't. It was as if something was blocking it, preventing it from coming to light.

 

Staggering backward, my vision blurred and my knees began to buckle. I was sure that I was about collapse to the floor and pass out from the pain until my head landed on something on the way down that didn't feel like the cold hard marble flooring of the castle. Rather, it was warm and soft.

 

The throbbing in my head began to cease and my eyesight slowly returned. Through the white strands of my hair that covered my eyes, the face of the King gradually rendered itself into view. I had landed square in his midsection, my head landing right at the base of his chest. I could tell he was confused because he wore a perplexed look on his face while he was looking down at his daughter. As for me, I was still a little dazed and no excuse as to what just happened was forming in my head so I did nothing but stare at him.

 

After a brief pause, he broke the awkward silence.

 

"Hey." He casually greeted.

 

"....Hey." I returned.

 

"You alright?"

 

"Yeah, I just.....got a little dizzy."

 

"Oh, well I'm glad I caught you."

 

He leaned me forward, setting me back on my two feet. I swept the strands of hair that rested on my face back behind my ear and turned around, properly facing him. He was wearing a long black robe complemented with a black shirt and plaid flannel pants underneath.

 

He glanced at the door behind me before returning his gaze back onto me. I figured he was going to ask something along the lines of, "What are you doing here at this hour?" so without wasting another moment, I cut him off with a question of my own.

 

"I didn't see you at dinner earlier, were you busy with something?"

 

"Ah, sort of." He answered while scratching his left cheek with the tip of his finger. "You see, I was looking for something but I couldn't find it."

 

"You couldn't find it?" I asked, in an effort to keep him away from questioning my whereabouts.

 

"Well, eventually I did, but not without the help of the young ones."

 

"Young ones? He must be referring to Elvira and the other two who weren't in the hall with me

 

"I wanted to see you off before the day was over but you were already vacant from the hall when I came by. So, I headed to your room where I was greeted by another empty room and a door left wide open."

 

I didn't even realize it. I must've been so worked up that it slipped my mind to close my door before leaving.

 

Knowing where this was headed, I tried to ask what was it that he found but he cut me off.

 

"Aht, no more of that young lady. I won't entertain it any longer." He interjected. "What are you doing here so late into the night?"

 

I couldn't say I was surprised that he figured out what I was doing. He was the King after all.

 

Though I'm pretty sure it didn't take a king to see through my terrible deception skills.

 

"I....uh...."

 

I couldn't think of anything. My head wasn't back at one hundred percent and was still recovering from the shock it had received so my excuse-making ability was lowered (somehow) even more.

 

I was positive I was about to come up with and blurt out something not very smart until he raised his hand and shook his head.

 

"Wait, you don't need to answer that." He apologized. "That was insensitive of me. It's only natural you'd want to come to her room before tomorrow."

 

"Tomorrow? Shoot, the academy."

 

I had forgotten about it for the second time on the same day. My brain must've been trying to push it out and I couldn't blame it. Though no matter how much I despised the very thought of it, I gave a little prayer of thanks in the back of my mind to it for bailing me out of suspicion.

 

"It's been a while since I've been down this hall."

 

 

"It has?"

 

"Yes. I tend to stay away from it if I can. It brings back memories." He told me as a troubled smile surfaced on his face. "Some that I hold dear to me, that I'll never forget as long as my heart still beats. And others, which...aren't so great."

 

He stepped past me and laid his right hand against the door of the Queen's former chamber.

 

Following a quick interval of silence. Without looking back at me, he called my name.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Have you entered inside yet?"

 

"No, not yet."

 

"Do you want to?"

I thought about it. The King being here eased the seemingly never-ending rush of emotions that swelled inside of me. If he accompanied me inside, there was a possibility that I could remain calm and not have another episode of whatever ambushed me before, allowing me to move in the right direction with my investigation. Saying, "Yes." was the most logical decision.

 

But something in me knew it wasn't the right one to make. Anytime the Royal Maid's brought up the Queen, their voices always began to trail off and carry a tone of sadness with it. The King was not exempt from this. It was clear to see that even he had trouble confronting anything about her. Wanting to go inside for my own gain was plain selfish. And being selfish, was something that I had been doing since arriving here. I wanted to make a change and approach him, especially him, with honesty. He deserved at least that much from me.

"I.....I came here because I thought I would feel something." I confessed. "I assumed that by maybe confronting these feelings that I have, I would come to some sort of understanding. But....." I gripped the area above my heart and continued. "But coming here changed that. The past can be scary sometimes. It could have things that we don't want to remember. And rather than reflecting and confronting it, maybe it's best that we let go and accept what's happening now."

 

I was talking to myself. Midway through what I was saying, I began to think of my own circumstances. Dying, and then waking up somewhere that seemed so distant to what I was accustomed to. And that my past was something that I needed to stop reflecting on and instead, pay attention to where I was and who I've become now.

 

When I realized that I was rambling about my past right in front of the King, I gave myself a mental slap to the face.

 

"What am I doing!?”

I expected him to turn around and raise a brow at what I accidentally let slip but instead, it seemed like he took what I said in and agreed with me since he was nodding his head.

 

"Let go you said? I think you're somewhat right about that. Being stuck on the past hinders your ability to progress. Even if the people you hold dear are captured by it, you still have to move forward."

 

He lowered his hands and placed them on both handles of the doors until a sharp clicking sound was made. He then turned around and upon approaching me, placed his hand on the top of my head and lowered himself until we were about eye-level.

 

"Though, letting go is essentially the same as forgetting the past ever existed. And I could never forget the people aren't here with us today. And you shouldn't either. Instead, we should move forward for them." The smile that never seemed to leave his face returned. "Right?"

And I nodded my head.

------------------------------------

After I was back in my room, I thought about what the King said. Forgetting isn't the same as accepting. That I can accept the now, while not forgetting the then. I also made a subconscious note to watch what I say around him because I tended to stop thinking clearly whenever he's around.

 

I didn't get to go inside the Queen's room so I didn't get to fulfill what I originally intended to do. However, the trip wasn't a total waste. I did get to speak with the King for some time, and even if it was short-lived, it felt nice. Also, something the King did also piqued my interest. When he placed both of his hands on the door handles of the Queen's room, a clicking sound erupted. I didn't get to try it but it wouldn't be far-fetched to say that he possibly locked it, although those doors didn't contain any type of locks. Again, leading me to one conclusion, magic. It was the same exact situation as the locked drawer in my room, and I just witnessed how he did it.

 

I made my way back over to the drawer for round two. I placed my hand on the handle and this time, instead of pulling as if my life depended on it, I closed my eyes and concentrated. I never used magic before in this world so I was hoping that the Princess's body remembered how to, just like how it guided me to the Queen's room.

 

Fortunately enough for me, this was exactly the case. When I concentrated hard enough, I could feel something circulating inside the drawer. It was as if the drawer had a heartbeat and my hand was the stethoscope, feeling and listening to the sensation the drawer was giving off. I interpreted this as the magical energy that was stowed into the drawer to keep it shut; it's mana. 

 

"If mana is keeping it locked, then all I need to do is take it out."

 

Removing it was relatively simple, all I had to do was picture myself taking it back in. The heartbeat of the drawer grew fainter and fainter, then....

 

*Click!*

 

"It opened. That was easier than I thought it would be."

 

I slowly pulled open the drawer and the only thing that laid inside was a journal encased in black leathering. Cautiously, I picked it up, and after examining the outside of it, undid the latch and opened it.

 

Blank.

 

I used my thumb and skimmed through all of the pages. It was empty.

 

"Why would she hide an empty journal?"

 

『 Conjure! 』

 

The journal snapped open and instantly, my vision went dark.

------------------------------------

When I opened my eyes, I found myself sitting in a chair, surrounded by completely nothing. There was no sky or ground in view. Just empty pitch-black space, and I was in the middle of it.

 

"Where the hell am I?!"

 

And that's when I saw her.

 

Ten feet away a girl with pure white hair, purplish horns, and ruby red eyes, was staring right at me, her eyes widened. I would've thought that she was my own reflection if she didn't begin to speak.

 

"Well..........this is certainly unusual."