“I-I … We …” My mouth opened and closed like a goldfish, but the word fanfiction refused to leave my mouth that was rapidly becoming dry.

Why did he care so much? Was he one of those people who looked down at those who wrote fanfiction as cringy losers?

I had a friend back in eighth grade at this very school who I thought was really cool. I hung out with her group of friends, who were equally popular in the grade. I had been really getting into writing fanfiction for a few different fandoms at that time. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of telling them.

They laughed and looked at me like I’d confessed to eating raw garden snails on an hourly basis.

After that, they started making subtle snarky comments hinting that I was weird whenever I was in their presence. The girl I thought was my friend began giving me pitying glances as she walked past me, like I was some kind of pathetic earthworm that had been cut into half for the sake of experimental curiosity.

They were quick to distance themselves from me, and I wasn’t desperate enough to go chasing after them. It still hurt, but I didn’t want them to see that they’d gotten to me.

Ashley, who had been more of a friendly acquaintance back then, had noticed the change in their behavior towards me. She came up to me and invited me to sit with her at lunch, where I got to know Derek and Melissa on a more personal level. By the end of lunch, I had made three new friends who were way cooler than my ex-friends.

Naturally, I became very tight-lipped about things like this after that incident. If Cody hadn’t revealed to me that he also wrote fanfiction, I would have disowned my notebook and pretended I would take it to the lost and found.

“We’re aspiring writers,” Cody said, casting a glance at me. “We bounce ideas off each other.”

“That’s right,” I said, seizing the lifeline he was throwing to me. “We’re writing buddies.”

Grateful for his help, I smiled at Cody. It was true, after all. We did share our writing and help to improve each other’s story ideas. The only thing was that we weren’t writing original fiction.

I jolted when Nolan’s eyebrows drew together slightly.

“Really,” was all he said in a flat tone.

“Yup.” I nodded vigorously.

Instead of responding, Nolan turned back to Derek. “No, I didn’t tear the nameplate off the door. I get detention on a regular basis. It’s not a big deal.”

I would be lying if I said that it didn’t sting a little, the way he turned away from me like he wasn’t just talking to me less than a second ago. On the other hand, I couldn’t blame him for being a bit suspicious of my answer.

Was it that obvious that I was hiding something from him? And why did it matter to him, anyway?

Taking a giant bite out of the chocolate chip cookie Nolan had given me, I chewed away furiously in an attempt to distract myself from his strange reaction.

---

We left the dining hall with several minutes to spare before the bell would ring.

“Hey, I need to use the toilet,” I said. “You guys can go ahead first.”

“I have to go, too,” Nolan said.

“Oh, sure,” I said. “Let’s go.”

Melissa waved at us. “See you in class!”

The rest of them continued on their way, and Nolan and I headed towards the nearest toilets together.

“I’m still amazed that you joined us for lunch,” I said. “How was it? You seemed to have fun talking to Melissa and Derek.”

Although they were mostly questioning him about the veracity of certain rumors involving him. I didn’t even know there were so many rumors about Nolan floating around in the first place.

“It was fine.”

“I noticed you left almost half your food on the plate. I feel bad for asking you to come when you weren’t even going to eat much.”

“I did tell you I wasn’t hungry,” he said.

“Yeah, but I thought you might have more of an appetite if you were actually faced with food.” I gave him an apologetic smile. “I mean, I’m like that.”

He adjusted the brim of his black cap so that it faced forward instead of sideways. “I don’t mind. Maybe I’ll join you again next time.”

I actually took a step back in astonishment. “Really? You will?”

“Yeah. It wasn’t terrible, despite your friends asking me all kinds of weird questions,” he said.

“Umm,” I said, smiling sheepishly, “I think they just heard so many contradictory rumors that they wanted to ask the person in question.”

“Only one or two of them were true,” he said, scoffing. “The rest probably took place in dreams.”

“Wait, which one was true?” I stared at him. “Was the Bradley one true?”

“Who’s Bradley again?”

I let out a heavy sigh. “Seriously? It’s been less than an hour, and you’ve already forgotten? Do you even remember my friends’ names?”

“I remember their names,” he said, shooting me an unimpressed stare. “The guy’s Derek, the blonde one is Ashley, and the brown-haired one is Melissa.”

“Wait—” I felt my jaw drop. “You remember them?”

“I remember names if they’re significant enough,” he said, shrugging. “Who’s Bradley?”

He’d gone from forgetting Cheryl’s name to easily rattling off the names of my best friends he’d only spoken to once. If I hadn’t been so busy trying to pick my jaw up from the floor, I would’ve given him a round of applause.

I couldn’t believe it.

We reached the toilets and had to put our conversation on hold.

When I came out, I had regained most of my composure. In the back of my mind, some part of me of screaming that Nolan, of all people, somehow managed to put names to the faces of my best friends when he couldn’t even be bothered to recall the classmate he regularly worked with.

I walked over to Nolan, who was already leaning against the wall outside waiting for me.

“Bradley’s the guy you allegedly threw into the wall,” I said.

“Oh,” he said, his eyes looking up as if in thought. “Right, him.”

We began walking again. Silence stretched on between us for almost a minute before I realized that he wasn’t going to continue.

“Wait, you can’t stop there,” I said. “Was it true? Did you really do that?”

Nolan hummed. “Did I? Maybe I did, or maybe I didn’t. What do you think?”

Scowling at him for his shameless ambiguity, I said, “What do you mean? If I knew, I wouldn’t be asking you, would I?”

“Do you want to know, though?” he said, shrugging. “You didn’t seem to be paying much attention when Melissa and Derek were asking me about it.”

“Of course I want to know!” I frowned at him. “That’s why I asked you.”

“I’ll tell you if you tell me why you were being so jumpy earlier,” he said, pulling out a box of mints from his messenger bag.

Great, now we were back on that topic. Why did he care so much about that?

He slipped a mint into his mouth before tilting the box in my direction.

“Thanks,” I said, sliding out a mint onto the lid and taking that.

“Well?” His green eyes were so piercing that my heart skipped a beat.

“What do you mean by jumpy?” I said, averting my eyes from his face.

“Oh, I don’t know, I just got the feeling that the whole aspiring writers thing wasn’t the whole story,” he said in a light tone. “If it were, I don’t think it would’ve been so hard for you to say.”

“It kind of is, actually,” I said. It’s only the content of what we write that’s hard for me to say.

“I didn’t know that you wrote. What do you write? Or do you only write with Cody?”

“Huh?” I stared at him. “No? We don’t co-write. Our writing styles are too different. We just motivate each other and read each other’s stuff.”

His expression remained unchanged. “Then why were you so reluctant to tell me?”

“I wasn’t reluctant to tell you,” I said, frowning. “I was just afraid you’d judge me, okay!”

“I wouldn’t judge you for writing,” he said. “It’s just a normal hobby. It’s creative.”

I winced. “I lost a few friends a couple years ago when they found out what I wrote.”

“Why? What did you write?”

I looked at Nolan. He was gazing intently at me, as if what I had to say was more important than not bumping into someone else in the hallway.

“I try not to tell people nowadays,” I said. “I don’t want them to think I’m weird.”

“I already think you’re weird, so we’re good on that front,” he said, but there was a gentle smile pulling at the corners of his lips.

“Seriously,” I insisted.

“I’m serious, too.”

I had to admit to myself that if I had to share this with anyone who didn’t already know about it, Nolan would probably be my first pick. There was a kind of closeness forged between us that wouldn’t have been present if not for our little forest secret. He’d also shared a few personal things about himself with me that I doubted any other student in our school knew.

“If I tell you, you can’t tell anyone.”

“Who would I tell? I don’t have any other friends, remember?” he said dryly.

“Good point.” I hesitated, and then beckoned for him to bend down. “I’d prefer if no one else heard.”

Nolan lowered his head until it was at my eye level.

I tiptoed and whispered in his ear, “I write fanfiction.”

There, I said it. I cringed and waited for his reaction.

He lifted his head to stare blankly at me. “What’s that?”

My heart was pounding as I said, “The stuff I write is based on a story that already exists. It’s like, I use already established characters to write a story about.”

“Oh. That’s all?”

My heart rate began slowing down at his lack of reaction. “Yeah, that’s all.”

“Why couldn’t you have just said that?” Nolan straightened up and raised his eyebrows at me. “I thought you were—” he broke off here and looked away for a short moment. “I thought it was something actually weird.”

“People’s ideas of weird can vary,” I said, annoyed. “I just didn’t want to put myself through trouble that could’ve been avoided entirely.”

In spite of my irritation at his lackluster response, I was relieved that Nolan really didn’t seem to care at all. He didn’t seem like the kind of person to judge, considering that he always just did whatever he wanted without regard for the opinions of those around him. I was just wary after the whole disaster that took place in eighth grade.

“Fair enough, but I didn’t think you had to worry about that with me. I’ve already been exposed to your uncontrolled shrieking whenever you’re in the presence of an insect.”

“Nolan!” I couldn’t help but smile, even though I was trying to sound indignant.

“By the way, I didn’t throw Bradley into the wall,” he said. “I did throw him to the ground, though. I don’t know where people got the wall impression from. Those are two completely different directions.”

Yeah, I didn’t have any problem believing that. Nolan was strong.

“Did he really run away after that?”

“I can’t remember,” he said. “I left once he was out of my way. I have better things to do than stand around and see what he did next.”

Nodding, I grinned at him. “Like sleeping.”

“Exactly,” he said.

---

Melissa yawned and stretched her arms up above her head.

“I love this evening breeze,” she said, sighing. “It makes me want to go for a jog.”

“Too bad we just ate,” Derek said, nodding. “I’d have joined you, too.”

Ashley set down three property cards before turning another page in the novel she was reading.

I wondered what Nolan was doing on this cool evening. He had to be awake by now. I still couldn’t get out of my head how he had sat with us during lunch today and conversed with my best friends.

The four of us were lounging about at one of the large stone tables in the courtyard, enjoying the clear, cooling weather and the fresh air provided for us by the greenery all around us. It was a peaceful evening, and none of us were in the mood to study.

We were playing Monopoly Deal with the deck that Melissa had brought to school, and she was constantly trying to think of how to make us hemorrhage money cards.

“Double the rent,” she announced, setting down two action cards at once. “Ten million, everyone.”

Shaking my head, I slid the required amount from my deck to hers.

“I’m broke now,” Derek griped, slapping his cards into her hand. “I hope you’re happy.”

When Melissa merely smiled sweetly at him, I chortled.

“Why, of course I am,” she said. “Thanks for the well wishes.”

“You’re only coming after our money,” Ashley said, rolling her eyes as she gave Melissa the cards. “Shouldn’t you be trying harder for our property?”

“After I drain you of all your money, your property will come on their own,” she said, flashing Ashley a bright smile.

“Not if someone surprise-wins,” I said, setting down my next three cards. “You never know if one of us is just biding our time.”

Ashley looked past me and frowned. “Hey, what’s that?”

“What?” Melissa said.

We all turned to look.

All I saw were the usual trees and shrubbery around us.

“Where?” I said eventually. “I don’t see anything.”

“I don’t know,” she said, a slight shakiness to her voice. “Isn’t there something moving in the grass over there? To our left? Is it an insect?”

Derek got up from the table. “I’ll check it out.”

“Please tell me it’s not an insect,” I said, starting to tremble myself. “I can’t deal.”

“We all know, Chelsea.” Melissa flashed me an amused smile.

Ashley was right. There was a slight rustling in the patch of grass where she was pointing at. It was only a few feet away from us, so all I could do was hope for it not to start flying in our direction.

“What?” Derek’s voice was incredulous. “It’s a bat.”

“A bat?” Melissa stood up quickly and went over to him. “Didn’t we just see one, like, last month?”

Another bat? That was really weird. Ashley and I exchanged curious glances before getting to our feet as well. Bats were definitely not as terrifying as insects with their six legs.

It really was a bat. I stared down at it as it crawled through the grass at the pace of a snail.

“Hey,” Derek said. “Isn’t it the same one we saw before? It even has the same gray marking on its back.”

I bent down to examine it. There was indeed a small stripe marking on its back that was in a lighter shade of gray than the rest of its body. I hadn’t noticed it before, but I wasn’t the most observant when it came to little things like this.

The way it was crawling unsteadily was certainly reminiscent of the way the bat that we saw some time ago, though.

“Is it just a really sick bat?” I said. “Why is it moving like that?”

The bat screeched and launched into the air with its flapping wings. Almost immediately, it fell back to the grassy ground.

When it took off a second time, it managed to stay in the air for a few seconds longer before dipping slightly. It let out a few more screeches, desperately trying to keep itself in the air and flying away from us.

“We should probably back up a bit,” Ashley said. “Can bats have rabies?”

“I have no idea,” Melissa said, stepping backwards. “Since it’s not an insect, I think we’re safe to continue sitting here. Can we go back to playing so I can seize everyone’s property?”

“Just hearing you say that makes me want to keep standing here, you know,” Derek said.

Ashley laughed as she began walking back to our table.

I stared at the bat, mildly fascinated by how wild its movements were. It continued to fly in a zigzag motion, as if it were unable to control its flight.

I thought it would’ve returned to its home when I saw it going towards the forest the previous time, but it was strange that it was here on campus ground again.

Was it lost?

---

AN: thanks for reading! hope you're having a great week! <3