.......

My dream.... it looks different this time. I look at my hands. I'm like a puzzle missing it's pieces. I turn around and find pieces of me scattered all around. I was breaking down. I tried to walk around and pick my pieces up. I pick some up, but more and more pieces fall of from me. The harder I try, the more effort I make, the more I come apart. It's so futile. I stumble and fall to the floor. I scattered. I shattered to pieces.... I feel.... Nothing....

....

Then, I heard that voice.

???: "You... you're not alone anymore. I'll help you. I'll put the pieces back together. And those what's missing. I will give you mine! If this will make your wish come true, to make you much better, I will willingly give it to you. Just promise me, save them all."

........

........

I wake up to my alarm. August XX, 20XX. 6:30AM. It was Wednesday, my third day. That dream, it was too weird. I can remember it. And some new things too.

"Well, at least now I have something to write about."

I sit on my desk and grabbed pieces of paper. I started to write my poem. Hopefully, I won't get late again.

.....

There! Done! I read my revision and starts copying it to another piece of paper. I read it again.

_________________________________________

The Missing Pieces

I see parts of me around the floor.
I pick one up yet another one falls.
I tried to put myself together,
But every time I move,
Another piece will lose.
Every time I tried to pick up more,
I became more undone.
I feel like I will be gone.
I put myself back together,
But I always fall apart.
Again, and again, and again.
I lose myself in trying to find myself.
I'm never whole anymore.
I'm lost, incomplete, missing.
Still, I still try to put myself back together.
Every time I try to fix myself,
I forgot a little more of who I was.
Of who I am.
Who am I?
What...Am I?

_________________________________________

Hmm. That'll work. I fold the poem and place it into my pants pocket again. Seeing the time on my wall clock, I hurried downstairs with my clothes and my stuff for school. I just took instant noodles and a cup of coffee. I hurried to the bathroom near the guest room and took a shower. I hurry up and get ready. I look again at my wrist watch. It's already 7:50AM. Dang. I decided to text Sayori if she's up. I text a second message to let her know I can't go on her house, for the reason that I will be late. I hope she sees it. She replied...

Sayori: ["I'll be staying at home. I feel sick from yesterday. You can go on without me.]

I guess she didn't feel good. I knew it she doesn't feel good. Glad I didn't overthink. I decided to go rush to school. I texted her one more.

["Okay, I'll come visit you later, alright? Take care! <3"]

And with that. I rush to the school. I can't wait for the poem sharing today.

....

I reach the school just before the gate closes. I am so late. I check the time. Why am I so worried about time? 8:10AM huh? I guess Mr.Sakurai will get mad at me. If you are wondering who is Sakurai, he is my homeroom teacher. That god-almighty young teacher that teaches science and history. And of course, I love the way he teaches. Not that boring. Not that sophisticated. Just Mr. Perfect himself. I head inside the class to see he isn't here yet. Despite being Mr. Teacher who is always perfect, he is not good at early classes. I guess everyone has their pros and cons. Minutes past, he arrives.

Mr. Sakurai: "Good Morning Everyone! I am sorry that I am late. And because that I am late, I won't record your attendance for being late, if there's someone here who is late too."

No, it's my fault being late. I raised my hand.

Mr. Sakurai: "Ahhh, Mr. Haruno. I did expect that. You were running in the hallways... and hey, you are a fast runner. Don't worry, I won't be-"

"Sensei, with all due respect, you don't need to do that. It's fine really. Besides, I will feel guilty if you have done that. So, please? It's alright, Sensei."

Mr. Sakurai: "And that's why I won't really record your tardiness, Mr.Haruno. You are so honest. That's your reward. Okay? No take-it-back? Good. Sit down now."

My classmates starts laughing at us, in a good way.

The whole class: "Sensei! We love you! Wohoooo!"

Everyone shouted so joyful. And some girls did say to me that I am so honest. Really, I did nothing. But I guess that's why we love Sensei too. He did said in the first day, at the introductions that he is sleep-deprived.
But as my class are getting so lovey-dovey at Sensei's nice reward for me, I can't seem to be happy. Even there's no pain in my head, I can feel a tightening grip from my heart. The heavy feeling, it makes me so anxious. I can't shrug off the feeling. It feels like I have done something wrong. Something I never would have done. It continued to the whole day.

.....

It seems that this feeling from my heart is not fading away, I decided to write a poem while eating lunch. But I failed miserably. Too many thoughts filled me up.

"Why do I feel this way? And why do I feel so worried about Sayori? Why?"

I continued to ask myself. Out of boredom, I tried to read the "Portrait of Makrov" again. But I feel like I shouldn't read it here in the classroom. Since it is lunchtime, and I have no appetite, I packed-up my things and leave it their for a while. I decided to go to the library.

Thank to some people who actually guided me there, I manage to reach it. I have 45 minutes left. I sat down to an empty desk and started reading. Just minutes of reading is making my head feel... weird. I started to laugh uncontrollably. Thank goodness. Nobody heard me. I close the book and snap out of it.

"Woah. I can't believe Yuri is reading this. It is so freaking dark. More suspense than a horror game I used to play."

I check around the library and found some computers.

"Last night, I remember researching about this book, but I haven't found a single clue about it. Wait, I did right? There was a summary at the internet last night."

I became curious. I searched the book's title. Nothing was found. It says that there's no such book existed.

"What?! Am I just dreaming last night!?"

Confusion overruns me. I searched the book's author, but the book itself... has no author? I feel so weirded about this. I breath heavily. Suddenly, some taps my shoulder.

"AAHHHHHHHH!"

Librarian: "It seems that something is bothering you? How may I help?"

The librarian was a tall, handsome man. About the age of 30+. I decided to ask him.

"Sorry, Sir. It is just that this book..."

Librarian: "Let me see...hmmm..."

He checks the book. I was shocked when he said...

Librarian: "I'm sorry, but this book is like something else. I didn't show up elsewhere. And a psychological horror book like this won't exist. People would like dark things. But this work, is so insane. No authors, no date stamps or published date, even the code or serial number. Nothing. Besides, if I were people in the market, I wouldn't sell something so mindbreaking. It seems like a one kind of a book as well. Where did you get it?"

But, Yuri had another one. She said it was on sale? I will question her later.

"From a friend, Sir."

Librarian: " <*whispers*> If I were you, I won't read such thing like that. Just by looking at the cover is so creepy. Try to convince your friend to stop reading. Well, that's just my advice."

"Alright Sir, thank you for your help."

I decided to leave the library to go back to my room. It was almost class time. I said my regards to the librarian.

....

The day ended as fast as possible. I decided that I am gonna tell Monika that we should not share poems for today. I decided to go there. I reach the clubroom and Monika is outside. I walk up to her.

Monika: "Ahhh! What a suprise! Are you going in?

"About that, I have to tell you something."

I explained to her that Sayori wasn't feeling well today and it'll be unfair if we show today's poem with everyone excluding her. She got my point so far. And then I said a thing about Yuri's book to her that made her somewhat uneasy. She was about to say something but she pauses. She then instead told me....

Monika: "Did you leave Sayori hanging?"

Those words brought chills to my spine. The heavy feeling in my heart tightens. I don't feel so good. I almost collapsed.

"Monika, sorry. Can I go to the infirmary with you? I need to lie down as well. My chest hurts."

Monika: "Ohhh, uhmm.. okay?"

Monika looking concerned, Yuri and Natsuki notices us outside.

Natsuki and Yuri: "Why aren't you coming in?"

Monika: "Sorry guys, Haru here doesn't feel so good. I'll just bring him to the infirmary so he could rest."

Natsuki: "Ohhhh... take care then, dummy."

Yuri: "What about Sayori?"

Monika: "She's alright. Bur she's sick as well. Haru said she was at home, resting. After I bring Haru to the infirmary, let's go home pretty early today. Poem-sharing will be at hiatus."

"Sorry guys, I'll be fine so don't worry."

My head hurts, it is burning like hell. My heart aches so much. It hurts. It is like to explode. I almost pass-out. Thanks to Monika, I am at the infirmary, I decided to lie down.

"You could lie me down there now."

I point at a hospital bed. She then supports me and gently puts me down. She touches my forehead. I can see her worrying about me. I feel so sorry.

Monika: "Do you need anything?"

"No, you can go home now. You can leave me here. I'll just managed later."

Monika: "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I feel sorry for cancelling out our activities for today."

Monika: " Please be alright? I'll do everything for you."

"Thanks, but no thanks. You can really leave now. I am worried that I might say embarrassing things to you."

Monika: "Ehehehehe. You can still joke like that Haru. I guess you will be fine."

She closes her head in and kisses my forehead.

Monika: "Take care, alright?"

She then leaves the infirmary.

.....

.....

I hear a voice.

[You shouldn't have done that. Haruno. You'll get corrupted. Like her. Like them.
Get up. Get up. Get up.]

.....

.....

"....."

"....."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ACK! HA!"

I woke up screaming. It feel like something inside me is so wrong. Everything hurts inside me. But the pain earlier wasn't that hurting anymore. I did feel myself getting numbed. Despite my situation, I stand up. It still feels weird. But my mind. It is so full of Sayori. Sayori. Sayori. Sayori.

.....

....

....

I grabbed my stuff, and tried to walk easily and steadily. I head outside. Everything looks like grey.

"Is it going to rain?"

Dark clouds surround the sky. As I feel like I am getting better now, I tried to walk home. Alone. Without company. Without... Sayori.

Something flash through my mind. Her sweet smile. Her cute red bow. She herself.

......

"Sayori, I should go to see her... I... NEED.... TO.... SEE.... HER!"

My mind is so confused, I dropped my bag at the school entrance. I ran outside, to reach Sayori's house. My heart, it feels very tight. All I could think is about Sayori. Why is this happening? I shouted her name while crying. I shouted her name while running.

"Why is this happening to me? SAYORI! SAYORI! SAYORI!"

I didn't care about what is going to happen to me. I ran with all my might and eventually, I reach her house. My heart starts pounding. Very, very fast. As fast as I ran. I went inside in her house. It's so awfully quiet. I check the living room. Nothing. I checked the kitchen. Nothing. I heard something was knocked up upstairs.

"SAYORI?!"

Out of context, I grab one of her kitchen knives. I went upstairs. As I soon reach the second floor, my heart started to beat insane. I sweat like hell. My chest tightens so much than before. I can't take it anymore. I go to her room. I knock. No one answered. I opened the door.

"SAYOR-"

"SA-"

"YO"

"RI?"

....

I stumbled.

"AHHHHHH! AHHHHHH! AHHHHHH! AHHHHHH! AHHHHH! AHHHHH! AHHHHH! AHHHHH! AHHHHH! AHHHHHH! AHHHHHHH! AHHHHHH! AHHHHHH! AHHHHH! AH! HA! HAAAAAAA!"

I cried. And cried, and cried some more.

"GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"FUCKING! FUCK YOU! HARUNO! WHAT HAVE I DONE! GAHHHHH! HAAAAA!"

......

.......

.......

......

I saw her.... hanging....