It brings me no pleasure (it does, just a little) in saying most of our lives have been destined for misery from the start. From birth being caged and growing in the wrong environment is a curse and being locked in the prison that is the body, your consciousness can never dream of escaping is hell on earth. Only so much a shark can do on land.
Perhaps the reason why humans have such a magnificent and flexible thought processing machine (because it never stops unless there is no power) such as the brain is to run away from all the scary things like death and we are not supposed to be here in the first place. Joying whatever or anything has a semblance of escapism is within all of us ( whether it's truly something to be enjoyed or just used to pass time), a need.
I'm just to give a helping hand to any one listening or reading. Handle one problem at a time the real ones and stop making up more to deal with because you are bored (to be honest I am probably saying these stuff more to me than you) which would make to talking to myself. Probably I am insane.
I went fishing alone far away at sea on a small boat where I can only see the water dark blue almost becoming purple with ghostly gazes as if it was staring back at me but it was only my reflection. Hearing the melodies of the waves and bird, visitors came and say hello then swimming away to their own life to live, having a close relationship to nature was made the world so much clearer because I was seeing everything in its single simply elements, life was so easy. The less variables the better even knowing out there was the most unknown place on the planet and most lifeforms wanted a bite of me (I have a slight feeling of merriment knowing I was finally needed), it was still more relaxing than living in a human society.
Being nowhere out on the sea with my conscious and prison fighting against each out for more than five months without catching anything, I didn't give up then right after I caught one. A fish worth of my love and respect then the line burst. I still didn't give up. Acceptance should be the final stage of dealing with any miracle or tragedy before we move on (if we ever do) .
Even though it was written "life is living, feeling the same emotions over and over until you become numb" now that has some truth in it as everything does despite that feeling something as special as emotion can only be done now, not the past or in the future only in the present. This continuous cycle will make living forever feeling fresh and familiar but always new. "Life is living feeling the same emotions over and over but find different ways to feel them ".
The beauty of the world is someone on one side is having the best time for their life in the morning and on the other side someone is at their worst. Both of them can be at their best and worst at the same time.
I for one can never take time serious because it's its both too slow and fast . I can look back at the five months of fishing nothing with a smile and back at a test that took a hour to complete to get my life with cold frown. I went in school for five years to do my job in five minutes and asking for a price which is more than what I payed for school. I don't really have anything to talk about and write (thus why I'm even barely can be called a writer).
Rose was still looking at the black spot on the bar table, she hated the spot, despises it even, it was just out of place not adding anything of value to the table (or even the conservation) except someone would say it gives off an artistic feeling due to how different it is from the other tables but all of that is just bullshit to cover their laziness of not cleaning the stain.
She looked around her surroundings to make use of covering the stain, her beer bottle was near so she used it. It wasn't any much good to her any ways because she didn't was anything but herself control her thoughts and action, especially something coming out of such an ugly thing as a beer bottle. Some will say it is a waste, she should have give it to one else even someone less fortunate like a homeless person, she did pass an homeless person they were just in front of the bar (which the place they reside didn't really do much to help their case they were selling) it's great she didn't help the person although It may seem harsh she rather do nothing than help. She didn't want anything on her mind like what will the person eat, sleep and live the next day. This notion is a series of helping and helping until you have nothing to give. no one wants that responsibility, being selfish is an essential of living life especially if you wanna enjoy it. The longer I live the more I think how can the wrongs be so right?
The fluid from the bottle wasn't much used covering the stain, she used her brown nail polish to cover it just a touch. It did the job good enough, the table was as it was before the stain. Brand new, that was the problem, she knew the table still had a black stain, it ruin everything. She thought so what if the table didn't have the stain anymore, the stain was still there at some point, her ex boyfriend was still bad. Rose had a character flaw ( according to The Factory) knew the world was too gigantic in size, height and width to stay on one this thing, she wasn't a tree she can move and grow somewhere elsewhere. She heard they were some handsome men in the North so she went there and found her new boyfriend Noah. Background noises consisting cheers and tears of people to their family members, friends and significant other, the mood of the bar switches like higher-ups in war realizing they are on the losing side. The pure genius of a society is confining everyone of it's members in a mindset that this is the only place that exist for you although there are another places, you don't belong there. The location might change but the people are the same.
Rose wore smile it's not like she didn't care about her boyfriend going to the war potentially dying. The sky is falling perhaps that's why we have roofs. She thought wars come and go that's all, if you want anymore thoughts and commentary about them go ask a bird for them. She and I also some other found it interesting that kingdoms of the past with their all their might and kings with all their power became in the present only as strong as dirt and the ones who try to find art in people and the world remain strong as pillars in all their might and glory even though they remain so because a hellish place like school teach and force them on to other, they were still awe inspiring. Rose grabbed the beer bottle with an immense force to shatter it across the table, lifting it up and down then she saw her reflection in the bottle so she put it down on the table and fixed her makeup. Words brings an precise insight of someone's life, sorry I don't want someone seeing so far into mine.
