I’ve always thought that I was patient person, especially compared to when I was a brat. Back then, I would end anyone who got on my nerves without even thinking about it. Kill, maim, throw them through a wall, the list of options were endless. Anything I wanted, I would take, with only one exception in 2,000 years. Even the old monsters didn't want to deal with me and left me to my own. 

          Now that I’m old though, I have finally met someone I can’t deal with.

          “They’re our houses, as long as no one gets hurt it should be fine, right?” Aenaziel blinked with what she probably thought was innocence, but it just came off as dense.

          “Aren’t angels supposed to be calm and non-destructive?”

          “Well, we are supposed to avoid collateral damage whenever possible and try not to cause problems for others.”

          “Won't setting fires break both those?”

          “What are you, the council? I’m retired, what are they going to do? Set me on fire?” Considering they'd probably have to throw her in lava for her to get burned...

          She made a good point, but I felt something off about our conversation. The cave was barely lit by the distant sun. We had played chess for the day and now the sun was beginning to set once more. Meaning this blasted bone of a woman had only one day to completely upset my view of archangels. Considering her children, I really shouldn’t have been this surprised.

          Speaking of… “Fine, I would rather burn the place than let some snot-nosed little brat mess with my things. We’re going to my place first.”

          “Oh? Have something you’d like to avoid having others find?” Aenaziel grinned at me, but I just sighed.

          “…no, just a pair of things I need to return.” I found myself grumbling to the floor.

          “…if it’s my children’s heads, I’ll tear yours off and feed your feet to the hellhounds. Not necessarily in that order.” Her smile and tone didn’t change one bit.

          “You know I returned their bodies intact.” I reminded her.

          “Oh right… it was my husband and that middle child of mine that didn’t come home in one piece.”

          “What happened to them?”

          “Well, that middle child,” she paused, looking wistful and slightly helpless, “He inherited my dear’s intelligence and luck along with my own courage and stubbornness. Before we knew it, he had run off to sign up for the war.”

          “So, he was killed in battle.”

          “What?" She gave me an upfronted looked, which was rather impressive since she smile didn't drop at all, "No, that dear child of mine, Silizy was his name, was an idiot that tripped on a rock after running into a minefield, after his commander told him not to, because it was a shortcut. The explosions set off a chain reaction that leveled a mountain range. Turns out there were gas filled mine caverns littering the area. The child was vaporized, yet no one else was hurt save for some permanent hearing loss.”

          “…and your husband?”

          “Tried to make friends with a pack of hellhounds after he got lost trying to find the town square that was a block away from our home.”

          “…how?” Hellhounds, obviously, were not in Heaven. Or anywhere near it.

          “My husband was not a clever or lucky man.” She had a gentle and vaguely proud smile on her face. I don’t know what kind of expression I had, but I’m guessing it wasn’t a good one. Suddenly I was really glad the two I did meet didn’t take after their father. If I had died to an accident after living so long… Though it does explain why the angels had an entire division for the deaf. They were fun to mess with. 

          The sun finally disappeared completely, and we set off to Hell. We could have opened a portal in the cave, but it’d be easier to go to a spot where the dimensions were a bit closer. Plus, opening a portal in our lair would make it easier for the brats to reopen it.

          “A cemetery?”

          “Don’t give me that look, somethings are clichéd for a reason.”

          “Actually, you can reach Heaven from cemeteries too.”

          “Really?”

          Areas that are close to our dimensions were closely guarded secrets on both sides, there were the actual entrances where you can walk in, but they were guarded and armed to the teeth. Sneaking an angel, especially one that stands out like ivory embedded into ebony, is impossible.

          “Stay behind me, and- where did you get a torch?” I turned around after letting her leave my sight more all of two seconds.

          “Oh, this?” Aenaziel blinked innocently, “This is... for seeing in the dark! yes, he'll buy that...”

          “What was that last bit?”

          “Nothing.”

          “Demons can see in the dark. Having a torch will alert everyone within a direct line of sight anywhere in pitch black eternal night that is Hell.”

          “oh, right.”

          “Besides, can’t you manipulate light?”

          “…when you go-a-ransacking, you’ve got to have a torch…”

          “We go in, grab the stuff, set the fire and run, got it?” When was the last time I had a headache? I rubbed my forehead and wondered why, despite the pain, I never actually felt like killing her? Whacking her head, yes, but not killing her. Yet, anyway.

          “Yessir General!” She gave me a sharp salute that was undercut by a wide grin.

          “if only I could believe that”

          “What? You’ll have to speak up, I was within a hundred miles of that explosion and my hearing’s never been the same.”

          “…don’t leave my side.”

          “Aw, is that a proposal?  Ow!”

          I had to rub my hand; her skull was really thick.