Distantly, someone was speaking. TO realized that they had been for a while, but the voice had just been washing over them, and they hadn’t even thought to listen to what the person was saying; they hadn’t focused on anything actually, they just felt like they were spinning in nothingness. 

 

Now, the odd, ethereal spinning had stopped. They were still moving, though; their body shifting as something under them moved. 

 

“....... I don’t know…. Meet you…. Get Goretta…” 

 

Some words were making sense, forming some meaning instead of existing as noise, of random syllables which drifted through the air. 

 

“Do, I don’t know what the hell happened.” Ah ha. A full sentence. TO even recognized the speaker this time. It was Tham-

Tham. The water, the gun, the agent, the authorities, the blood…

It made TO’s head hurt, but oddly, it felt like that had all happened weeks ago, although they had only shut their eyes for a moment.

“I’m bringing them to safety.” Tham said again, “I didn’t do anything to them; I swear. They just outright fainted.” 

 

I’m fine TO tried to say, but all they could do was move their tongue, to crack open the lips briefly. They didn’t even feel like they had the power to breathe out hard enough to make noise. 

 

“Yeah, ok.” Tham said, “I’ll see you there.” Who was he talking to? TO didn’t hear any other voices. 

 

What happened to them? Were they sick? Drugged? Did something in the water have an effect on them, or did Tham, despite his protests, have something to do with it? They forced their eyes open, but when they did, it felt like what they were seeing didn’t make sense. They tried to speak again, and at least this time they could make a noise. 

 

“You’re awake?” Tham asked. TO’s attempt to say, yes, I am. What happened came out as just another low moan. “Good.” Tham said, “Just don’t throw up on me. I don’t have space to put you down here, and I’d rather not have a synth puke on my back.” 

 

On his back? 

 

It was like that statement helped TO to anchor their thoughts, gave them a reference place to start at. They were moving. They were on Tham’s back, their arms draped limply over Tham’s shoulder, his long tail supporting the rest of TO’s body. 

 

“... I won’t.” Their voice was still soft, still faint, but TO was just happy that they could pronounce words instead of a grunt or moan.

“Yeah. well.” Tham shifted TO on his back, “I’d appreciate that. Pearla - I called her and GiDi to let them know what happened - said you might. Apparently, when people faint, they can get sick or something.” He snorted. “Shit, you went down like a bag of rocks. You didn’t even fall over, you just crumpled. Thought that people swooned or something when they fainted.” 

 

“... Sorry.” TO slurred before burying their face in Tham’s back. They didn’t want to move, didn’t want to think. It hurt to think.

“Not your fault.” Tham said. “You couldn’t really help it. Didn’t think you lot could faint.”

You lot. Synths. But To wasn’t a synth, right? Not really. What was it GiDi said? Something about them not being considered “Synths” by the others because their brains hadn’t been altered.

Not Synths. That other thing. Chilacians. 

 

It was still hard to move, and even that bit of thought hurt their mind. Still, they wanted to get up, to walk the rest of the way on their own power. They groaned as they tried to push themself up.

“Just rest.” Tham said, “Pearla said you’ll probably feel better in a minute, but she also said to make sure you don’t walk until we get you to Goretta.”

TO sighed and relaxed once more. They were grateful that they couldn’t quite think properly, because they had a feeling that they didn’t want to think, that they didn’t want to consider things properly. 

 

They wanted to be with DH. They wanted to lie down, wrapped in DH’s wings and arms.

“... You were impressive.” Tham said after the silence dragged out a little longer, “I mean, thinking about the air in the caves, right? I mean-” He huffed, “I could have swum out once the water got a little higher, but if I had waited that long, then if anyone else was overhead, they could have looked down and shot me.”

To just nodded, hoping that despite not being able to see them, that Tham would feel the movement, and figure out what it was.

“Right.” He said. “So thanks.”

TO nodded again, but kept quiet. They were more aware of their body now, of their wings draped down and scraping against the ground. It took more effort than it should have to fold them up against their back, but it was better than letting them scrape more than they already had.

For now, they just had to focus. Stay on Tham, keep their wings up, and don’t throw up.

Simple. 

 

======

 

Pearla and GiDi went right back to the hideout hidden deep in the tunnels, and Tham promised to meet up there. Thankfully, they didn’t go to the common room; they went instead to the room where they trapped TO and DH beforehand.

“No, not here.” TO hissed. They didn’t mind being trapped like Avery was, but they still didn’t want to be locked up again.

“It’s fine.” Tham said, “I'm not locking you in. Look.” He reached up as he opened the door and pulled down a little leaver that TO hadn’t noticed before. When the door closed behind them, it stayed propped open.

“TO!” 

 They were hardly inside when DH came rushing up to them, a hand on TO’s shoulder. “What happened to them? GiDi said-”

“They fainted.” Tham said as they brought TO to the bed, “Here, help me get them onto the bed.”

“Are you sure that’s all?” DH snapped, an edge to their voice that TO hadn’t heard before, “If you did anything to them-”

“They didn’t.” TO whispered, “Tham carried me out. That's all.” 

“I should have been with you.” DH said as Tham brought TO up to the bed, “I should have-”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s not. If I had been there-”

“Instead of what ifs, you can help him onto the bed.” Tham snapped, but there wasn’t as much venom in his voice, “And do your synth medical stuff.” He huffed.

“I’d have been there if a certain Nagarajin hadn’t fought against it so much.” DH snapped as they helped TO to the bed, laying them down gently and draping a blanket over them. “Then maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”

“Doubtful.” TO murmured. It was just bad luck. 

“Whatever.” Tham snapped, “I’m going to go find Goretta-”

“She’s helping a few of the people that came from the tunnels.” DH said, “A few of the people from the tunnels got injured, so she’s busy.”

Tham hissed as he held his injured arm, “It’s fine. It can wait.”

“Wait.” TO said as DH pulled their medkit from under the bed, “Wait.. DH can help you.” 

Confused eyes from both Tham and DH hit TO. TO turned to DH. “Tham got injured. Civilian gun; the kind with actual bullets. His left arm-”

“Right.” Tham said.

TO nodded, “Tham, DH did a lot of training in medicine. They can fix your wound… That’s what you-” They seemed to lose their breath and felt suddenly exhausted. Their words trailed off, and they relaxed into the pillow.

“TO! What’s wrong?”

“Tired.” They muttered. “Help Tham?” 

“I need to help you first-”

“I just want to rest.” They said, their mind still foggy and unfocused. “He carried me out of the tunnels.”

“Not that big of a deal.” Tham muttered, “Couldn’t let you stay there. GiDi wouldn’t have liked that very much.” 

DH hesitated for just another moment, then took their medkit and stalked over to Tham.

“Get over in the opposite corner.” They demanded, “Away from TO.”

TO turned away. They didn’t want to see DH do their work, and were happy enough for a moment to rest their eyes.

“Wouldn’t it be easier by the bed or table-”

“I don’t want you anywhere near TO.” they said.

“What, like I’m going to hurt them at this point, with you around-”

“It’s not that.” DH said, “TO doesn’t do well with blood.” TO could hear DH rummage through their bag, the background noise to the stunned silence that followed, only to be broken when DH finally said, “Show me your arm.”

“... What do you mean they ‘don’t do well with blood?’”

“Just what I said.” DH snapped. TO could hear the sharp intake of breath from their mate, “This doesn’t look great, and I think the bullet’s still in there… but it’s not spurting at least. Nothing important hit, anyway.” More rummaging in their bag, “I don’t have any painkillers for Nagarajin-”

“It’s fine, I don’t need it.” They said, “So what, that’s happened before? They’ve fainted like that before?”

“They’ve gotten woozy. They got close to fainting, but not quite.”

“I wasn’t exactly in difficult situations the other times.” TO said. All the other times they had been in a stressful situation like that, it was in a simulation, or there was no blood otherwise. To see Tham’s gory arm just as their adrenaline was fading off…

After killing- 

No. Their head hurt. TO didn’t want to think about that. They wanted to think about how comfortable the bed was, and how close DH was to them right now. They didn’t want to think about bodies bending oddly, or flying limp through the air.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Tham snapped, just before hissing in pain.

“That’s just some basic disinfectant.” DH said, “It’s going to hurt worse to get the bullet out.” 

“It’s fine; just do it.” Tham snapped, “And someone should have told me that TO can’t deal with blood.”

Had Tham called them TO before? Hadn’t it just been ‘the synths’ or ‘that one’ before? They couldn’t remember.

“Well? Why didn’t you tell me?” Tham demanded before cutting himself off in a hiss of pain again. 

“Wasn’t important.” TO muttered. They had a headache. They pressed their hands to their head. It wasn’t important. They didn’t think about it. They don’t normally tell people that about themself right away; especially people they don’t trust, and who so obviously hated them, hated all synths.

Of course, most people hated synths, it seemed. Pearla didn’t hate them as much as she seemed to, but she was also GiDi’s mate. Lendulin was upset. Petra hated them so much..

But Petra knew now, didn’t she? Or she would soon, and then she’d hate TO and DH too. Would she have the same rage that Lendulin did when she found out, the anger over being lied to?

TO took deep breaths, and tried not to think. There was too much to think about.

Their head hurt.

They could still smell blood.