The seal is broken.

 

Nichodemus and I rise up the staircase and I carry the dungeon-master on my back.

 

*Thwack*

 

A small hand hits the back of my skull. But I just ignore it. I suppose the dungeon-master doesn’t see this as being carried, more of as them riding me like some kind of creature or battle-mount.

 

*Thwack*

 

I snap my skull around in a full turn, my spine breaking off again as I turn around to look up at the small person sitting on my shoulders.

 

*Thwack*

 

Ow. “I feel like the third one was a bit much,” I say in protest.

 

  The dungeon-master glares down at me with venomous eyes and hisses. “You just wait. Once I get back to my table… you’re going to learn a lesson. You’re going to learn.” They jab a finger against my forehead. “You’re lucky we got out of there alive, you shit. What would you have done if I died?! Huh?! You’d just never respawn again! Then what?! You’re nothing without me, you shithead! So start acting like it!”

 

I tilt my head, staring at the dungeon-master curiously, but then snap my skull back around forward.

 

“I just wish you’d see,” I sigh in defeat. Getting my mind off things, I start to hum to keep myself occupied.

 

“See what?! SEE WHAT?! YOU!” The dungeon-master points to Nichodemus. “EXPLAIN!”

 

  Nichodemus looks at the dungeon-master, but then turns his head back forward and says nothing further. The bones on the back of my neck rattle as the forces that hold me together reconstruct my spine once again, for the third time or so now. I’ve lost track. The dungeon-master screams in frustration.

 

“I RUN THIS PLACE! DON’T IGNORE ME YOU SKELETON FUCKS!”

 

The dungeon-master doesn’t see, but I don’t want to tell them. It would be mean. I want to let them dream. I want to let them have their throne to sit on. Even if it means I get wailed on a little. I appreciate that Nichodemus is keeping quiet too. Thanks Nichodemus.

 

*Thwack*

 

Taking a little pain to protect the hearts of others is what the hero does, right?

 

But the truth is that I don’t need them anymore. The dungeon-master. If I die, the dungeon itself will force me to respawn one way or another. The dungeon-master’s once critical role in my existence is… nullified. Now? Now they serve only one purpose.

 

*Thwack*

 

  It makes me happy that they’re around. Even if they’re a jerk. It’s another strong feeling to protect. I was hoping the thief would be down there, I was hoping Madison would be down there. But both of them weren’t. What does that mean? Are they… gone? Did the ice get them? I didn’t see a trace of either of them. But honestly, if anyone was down there, Nichodemus would have taken them in.

 

I look over to the skeleton-caster floating alongside us.

 

Probably.

 

Grabbing the little legs hanging over my shoulders, I pull and jostle my body, getting the dungeon-master to sit back right as they were starting to slip.

 

*Thwack*

 

  Still. I’ve gotten most of them now. My hand rubs my eyes as we ascend and I leave it there for a second as I feel it. As I feel the tiny, minuscule vibration. As I feel the subtle, whispering rattle running through my bones. The energy. Not enough to shake my armor, but enough to be felt if I hold my hands above my eyes. That tiny little draw of a string over a violin, like a never ending exhalation, like the buzzing of an insect trapped in my hollow skull. The sound that goes bmmmmmmmmmmm-

 

*Thwack*

 

“Stop humming you noisy shit!”

 

I sigh, opting instead to tap my lance as we walk.

 

Ding.

Ding.

 

*Thwack*

 

“STOP THAT! WHY CAN’T YOU JUST WALK AND BE QUIET?!” A pair of hands grabs my skull in frustration and jostles it around. “WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS DOING STUPID SHIT?!” My skull cracks as they pull it free and turn it around to face their fuming eyes.

 

I answer plainly. “Because the seal is broken.”

 

Nichodemus doesn’t say anything.

 

“THE ONLY THING THATS GOING TO BE BROKEN ARE YOUR BALLS ONCE I’M THROUGH WITH YOU!”

 

I snort.

 

  The dungeon-master’s eyes twitch as they scream wordless scream and slam my skull back down. Something changes in their voice, their tone growing from a raspy, throaty cry to a high-pitched wail. My bones snap and I turn my head back forward. Gotta watch where I’m going, wouldn’t wanna trip. A second later, the bones begin to mend as my body repairs itself again. I wonder if the dungeon is getting tired of me too?

 

Sorry dungeon, I’m trying my best, tell you what.

 

The dungeon hums. It knows.

 

The hum stops, the wail stops and all I hear is a deep crying coming from behind my head.

 

“I hate you.”

 

*Thwack*

 

“I hate you!”

 

*Thwack*

 

“Just get out of my dungeon!” Something rattles my neck. “Just leave. Just go. I can’t. I can’t-” The dungeon-master shouts again, their voice cracking.

 

In truth, this is where our plan is beginning to come together, guy. It’s a little cruel of us and I do feel kind of bad for making the dungeon-master cry, especially in public. But it’s what I had to do. The seal is broken, after all.

 

The end of the staircase is visible in front of us and we breach the surface, arriving in the moonlight-arena. The staircase from below connects to the cut off stairs that had once led to the goblin-outpost. Rest in peace goblin-buddies.

 

Ding. I tap my lance against the rocks.

 

“It would be advisable to remove this staircase,” says Nichodemus, talking over the howling dungeon-master.

 

“I need my t-taaaable~” cries the dungeon-master from my back. I guess now’s my chance.

 

“You want me to leave?” I ask, knowing the answer already. “I can try harder. But I need a favor.”

 

  “YOU SHIT!” The dungeon-master sinks their teeth into my skull, trying to bite me. Not much happens though, but I appreciate the fact that they tried. What a strong feeling they must have about me. Thanks dungeon-master. “I’m not going to do anything except spawn you over a magma pit for the next hundred years!”

 

I ignore their comment and simply get to my point. “Change the sub-boss spawns.”

 

“Huh?!” they ask incredulously, something wet hits the back of my head and I don’t know if its a tear or a drop of spit from when they just tried to bite me.

 

“The fairy-mother, the rat-queen, Nichodemus and the fairy of the fountain. I want them all to spawn in the library.”

 

“FUCK YOU! No!” they shout.

 

“Please?” I plead.

 

“NO!” yells the dungeon-master.

 

“I’ll be your friend?” I promise, secretly hoping this will bring them around.

 

“YOU DON’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS AND THERE’S GOOD REASONS FOR THAT!”

 

I flinch, that hurts. But I know you’re here guy and so is eyeyoume.

 

“I’ll try to be serious about leaving the dungeon.”

 

“You’re supposed to do that anyways! IT’S YOUR JOB, YOU SHIT!”

 

*Thwack*

 

“Please?”

 

“No! And even if I wanted to, that would be cheating! The bosses have to stay within their bounds!”

 

“They do?” I ask.

 

“Yes! Asshole! A boss leaving its arena would be considered trying to cheat the dark-lord’s game!”

 

“Really?”

 

“YES!”

 

I ask. “Even the end boss?” We walk up the next staircase. “You know. The end boss of the dungeon. The… master, if you will. Of the dungeon.” I turn my head around. “Like some kind of… dungeon-ma-“

 

*Thwack*

 

The dungeon-master screams, realizing my point now. Their hands clasp their hair and they yell like a wild animal trapped in a cage.

 

I finish. “So since you’ve left the library, you’re cheating. Since you left your chair, you’re double cheating.”

 

“I didn’t leave! I didn’t leave! You kidnapped me! You shit-head! What have you done?!”

 

I shrug. “I didn’t do anything. But boy, the dark-lord sure is going to be mad at you.” I raise a finger. “But maybe nobody saw, yes? Maybe nobody has eyes, yes? Maybe nobody has to find out, tell you what. Maybe I can be a good, productive employee if I had a little incentive.”

 

The dungeon-master doesn’t say anything more and just cries now. I feel bad, but I had to do it. I can’t do this run to collect all of them each time I respawn, there isn’t enough time in the day. I need to make this work some other way.

 

I wonder where the hero-party is? I hope we can get to the library before they reach it.

 

I turn my head to look at Nichodemus who looks back at me. Apparently he was having the same thought, he raises his hand, forming a cloud of air beneath us both and we shoot up the staircase with blinding speed, heading back towards the library.

 

My plan is coming together, guy. I don’t know how long this body will last. But even if it doesn’t, I’ve secured us some time. It cost the dungeon-master some tears and a few hairs from their head. But I’m sure they’ll forgive me.

 

Their arms wrap themselves around my skull to hold on as we fly forward.

 

I’m sure if I work hard enough, that they’ll see me. That they’ll see my CONVICTION and with eyes that shine like crystals, with a strong feeling like mine in their heart, they’ll join me as I take us all to the apex of the world.

 

I do it for them, after all.

 

 

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