The days following the conference flew by in a daze. Wearing my mask of civility had never been this hard before during a meeting of the Coalition of the Independent City-states of Umbrea. So, when they finally left, I was drained. Exhausted and fuming at the same time.

So, I spent my days withdrawn, keeping my head down and staying away from people. I was either distracting myself out in the fields, somewhere deep in the forest, or holed up in my study. Normally, I would be out and about cross campus just so I can offer advice and guidance to any of the hundreds of students left in Paideia.

Nothing stopped my mood from spinning out of control, however.

The world could burn for all I cared.

I was done with their nonsense.

I sighed and leaned my head back against my balcony wall.

Of course I wasn’t. If I was, I would have ended things a long time ago.

One way or another.

I opened my eyes and looked down at my open hand as I clamped it shut in a tight fist.

The unfortunate truth was that one couldn’t show people they weren’t the monster they claimed you were by force. Even when reason was utter insufficient. Fighting hate with hate, or with any kind of violence, was as impossible as me stopping to care about people.

Another unfortunate truth was that me caring about people was precisely why their hate cut so deeply. Especially when it came from someone I cared about.

‘You’re a monster,’ Seren’s words echoed through my mind, and I slammed my fist in the wall beside me, my fury resurfacing with a vengeance.

I let my hand slide down the rough surface of the wall as I slumped my shoulders. “A monster wouldn’t have stopped. A monster wouldn’t have realised their mistake, and it definitely wouldn’t have scared them; to see what they were capable of, despite the long-held beliefs that contradicted their actions. A monster wouldn’t have sought to rectify their mistake.”

All I got in response was a gentle breeze and the first rays of the morning light momentarily blinding me, as there was no-one here to listen to me.

As usual.

The door opened with a soft creak, drawing my attention. Fluminix pushed the balcony door open with her head, pausing as her eye caught mine.

I smiled softly at her, with a warmth I wasn’t really feeling, and motioned for her to come closer. Which she gladly obliged to, swinging the door wide open and practically running over to me.

She put her head down on my crossed legs, whilst she curled the rest of her body up, her tail gently tapping my knee. I ran my hand over her scales as I took her in. By now she stood at almost one and a half paces tall, coming up to above my hip, whereas her body was about three paces long. She really was tall for her age, taller than most large dogs at this point.

“What has you so giddy this early in the morning?” I asked her softly, as I gave her a few scratches behind her horn.

She raised her head and gave me a withering glare.

“What?” I asked her, confusion riddling my face.

She huffed and put her head back down, pointedly facing away from me.

“Okay, I take it I did something wrong?” I hedged. Not that me doing something wrong was out of the ordinary. According to everyone else in the world, everything I did was wrong.

She slowly turned her head so she could face me with one of her eyes, which she cracked open into a pointed glare.

“Something important?” I asked, trying to guess at what she wanted. Which was really getting old at this point. “Something to do with today?”

She nodded, if only barely, before huffing and turning away from me again.

I blinked in confusion, having no clue what was so important about today. I was just a day like any other, as far as I knew. Just another summer day, as was normally the case in the first couple of weeks of Vulcanis…

“It is your birthday,” I said with my brows drawn in a frustrated frown. “Or rather, your hatchday, isn’t it?”

Was I really so out of sorts that I was slipping that badly as to forget the birthday, sorry, hatchday of someone I cared about?

Fluminix let out a rumbling growl that I could only interpret as her saying, ‘Finally. Took you long enough.’

“I’m sorry, okay?” I said, as I leaned my head back against the wall again and absentmindedly resumed giving her scratches. “I promise not to forget again.”

She huffed in reluctant agreement, as she leaned into the scratches.

So, she was already one year old, huh? Time sure flew by, and with it came a lot of unexpected changes. Some I had hoped to be good but turned out to be a disaster, others were just the normal sort of changes that came with the passage of time.

I looked down at the infant dragon again, once more taking her size in, and frowned. This couldn’t last. I knew that already, going into this caregiving relationship. I knew that one day she would be too big to stay here. I knew, but chose to ignore it. In a year she would have to be taken to a different home, one more suited for her and her kind.

I sighed softly and switched back over to running my hands over her scales.

If only that was my only worry about her. Around their first hatchday, dragons normally grew into their innate magic. Except, Fluminix showed no signs of doing so.

None whatsoever.

Maybe I should have brought her to the dragon monarchs from the get-go? Maybe I should have taken her up north, to the land that always remained frozen, to the land that became the refuge of the dragons following the widespread introduction of dragon hunts? Maybe I was just never suited to be a caregiver, to be a… mother?

After all, I couldn’t even protect my own children, so what made me think I could ever take care of a newly hatched dragon? Hubris? Nostalgia? The simple fact that this very dragon resembled my bonded-sister so terribly much? Was it… loneliness? A desperate attempt to do something? Anything to cling to a life I no longer wanted to live?

I closed my eyes and slowly let out a breath, whilst my hand still, causing Fluminix to look back up at me with her oh-so-curious eyes.

A soft smile naturally grew on my face at the sight.

No, I just fell for this adorable creature. Just as hard and fast as I fell for Seren. It was no simpler than that.

As much as it pained me. As much as I knew going into both relationships, how much it would hurt me in the end.

I just couldn't let it be, could I?

I couldn’t stop caring, just as mortals couldn’t stop breathing.

It was just who I was.

“So, what do you want to do on your hatchday?” I asked the infant dragon fondly.

Her eyes glistened with a curiosity I had come to know all too well, causing me to chuckle. My first honest laugh in weeks.

“I would love to,” I started apologetically. “However, I’m not really in the mood for a story this time. I’m sorry. But I’m open to anything else.”

She closed her eyes and rumbled thoughtfully, before turning her head in the direction of Tender Department’s housing building with a smile across her draconic face that most would consider to be vicious, but I knew to be merely mischievous.

I shook my head. Again, becoming apologetic. “I’m sorry, little one. I don’t think seeing Seren is such a good idea. I don’t think she ever wants to see me, to be honest. And I can’t find it in me to blame her for it…”

She huffed in annoyance, before getting up and going back inside. I quickly followed suit, both curious to see what she had in mind and worried she would try something I didn’t want to.

As she led me out of the apartment and down the stairs of the housing building, I could feel both my dread and fury start to rise. Dread at the thought of her leading me towards Seren, despite my wishes, and fury at the resurfacing thought of being accuses to be a monster. Again.

When we reached the ground floor, however, she continued down the stairs, and a smile started to bloom on my lips. One that grew as we descended the final flight of stairs and the smell and noises of the school’s kitchen became stronger.

“Would you, I don’t know, perhaps be interested in a cake, young Fluminix?” I asked teasingly, strongly suspecting she was.

Her squeak of delight was all I needed as encouragement.

“You do know I could have made one for you in my own kitchen, right?” I asked carefully.

She huffed haughtily as she pulled the kitchen door open, before stepping inside.

“Alright then, princess Fluminix,” I said as I chuckled at her antics. “So, tell me, what kind of cake would you like?”

She made a beeline towards the freezer where the meat was stored, expertly swerving through the crowd of hardworking kitchen staff. I followed after her at a much more sedated pace, offering the people greetings and apologies in passing.

“A meat cake it is, then,” I said, as I opened the freezer and we both stepped inside. “I’m thinking beef top and bottom, pork filling and bacon frosting?”

The look Fluminix gave me at the suggestion was so adorable that all my troubles almost melted away in an instant.

Almost. As they couldn’t be dampened even with the unadulterated love that the infant dragon showed me.

A glimmer of hope. That was what she was.

A glimmer of hope that was doomed to turn into despair soon enough.

But for now, I had a meat cake to make, and a hatchday to successfully celebrate.

Perhaps I could drag Eweleanor into it?

Ought to be fun, no?