CW: anal sex, sex toys

(Aryalat’s notes: I had this dream years ago, by then I had already figured out I’m trans but hadn’t started to transition yet, only a few of my closest friends knew)

(Aryalat’s notes: in this dream, I’m not playing myself, but a 18 year old trans girl named 7. I never figured out why she was called like that. When I write “me” in the story, I mean 7.)

(Aryalat’s notes: for some reason, 7 has quite short hair. My long hair, along with my breasts, are my most euphoric things by far, so… I am quite disconnected from that aspect)

This dream starts in a highschool hall, similar to the ones that appear in so many American series and movies, including the lockers and such. I (7) was stuffing some books from my purple backpack into my locker, when my boyfriend arrived to talk to me. He was handsome and athletic (Aryalat’s notes: typical american highschool popular guy). He was quite excited about our final prom before we had to start our university studies. I was also quite excited too, and looking at each other, we both knew that we were quite looking forward to the… extra, more intimate activities afterwards.

Fast forward to the prom, I was wearing a light blue long dress without sleeves, and he was wearing a dark suit with a tie matching the color of my dress, as we had coordinated beforehand. We took some pictures, drank some juice, danced some on the dance floor… Had the typical fun they show in the american movies.

After the party, his parents picked us up in a huge car and drove us to his house, as we had planned. During the trip, me and my boyfriend were sitting in the back seats, while they were sitting on the front. It seemed they knew what we intended to do afterwards, and they were making some lighthearted conversation about it, for example mentioning that they didn’t need to worry about the possibility of me getting pregnant. My boyfriend laughed along, but I felt slightly embarrassed, talking with his parents about these things. Still, they were quite cool about everything and made me feel quite comfortable with myself. Sometimes I looked out the window, and could see some distorted version of landmarks from my hometown, like the city hall being sliced into pieces that formed the regular hall from an angle, but when moving you could see the empty spaces between the slices. (Aryalat’s notes: after all these years, I can very well recall that particular image, I’m not sure why).

Eventually, we reached his house, which was a huge mansion type of house. His parents told us to have fun and we went to his room to have some privacy. We kissed, we started undressing… I was particularly happy to see his physical reaction when I told him that, since we were going to have fun tonight, I had been wearing a plug the whole night. As we were getting ready for it, we started talking about the future. He told me that he loved me, that he always wanted to be with me, and that he could provide for me.

Things started going sideways then, when he mentioned that he fully supported me getting my degree, but I wouldn't need to use it for work, more like a hobby then. I replied that I did not intend to be completely dependent on someone else for my life, that I wanted to have my career and my studies, even if they were not strictly necessary for our future life and economic stability. He reiterated that yeah, that he supported my studies and such, but that since it was not necessary, that I was doing it because I wanted to, it was a hobby then.

I called him an asshole that didn’t properly respect my future goals and wants, got dressed and left him there, before we had actually done anything. I walked home for like 20 mins at 2 AM (Aryalat’s notes: in the dream it was not dangerous, IRL I would be quite scared), and finally arrived home after climbing up the stairs instead of using the elevator. There, my father made some nice food for me as I half-cried explaining that instead of having a great night, I most likely just broke up with my boyfriend… And I woke up.