I am awake in my room.

My eyes are wide open but it almost seems like I am staring at a moonless sky—dim and gloomy. Some would even call it lifeless. Everything stayed relatively still as I sit on my bed. My eyes could not see but my ears could hear. The sound of the raindrops echo around me, creating a steady and curious melody. The slow tap of the dead willow tree’s branch on my window distracted me from the disjointed murmurs of my thoughts.

I look around my bedchamber. The candlelight shimmers faintly, illuminating only my desk cluttered with open books and crumpled papers. My windows are open, showing a bright silver moon peeking into my bedchamber as fine gossamer curtains riffle placidly amidst the gentle breeze.

Beside me, a teacup sits gingerly on my bedside table next to an incense stick. The room smelled of lemongrass, one of my brother’s most favourite smells. The scent surrounds me and keeps my thoughts from ever going astray.

“What do you mean Lord Zale is dead?”

I can hear my brother’s vassals argue in front of my room as Coleberg, the butler, tries to stop them from entering. “I’m very sorry Lord Remius. but the Lady does not want to see anyone at the moment.”

“What nonsense! Tell her to come out this instant!” Lord Remius demands.

He was always such a disrespectful little bug, especially to me. He never saw me as the little sister of Zale Circe—he only saw me as someone lower than him. A young and naive little girl who he thinks he can manipulate with his own two hands. He always talked down to me whenever we met in the mansion, but that never bothered me. Not until now.

“I’m afraid I cannot do that, Lord Remius.”

“You have to! Can she not see what a catastrophe this is?!” He screams.

“I think it’s best if you come by another time, my lord. The lady commanded not to let anybody inside her room.”

I can hear Lord Remius click his tongue from inside my room. I can imagine what his face looks like even now—but I pay him no mind. I have no energy to deal with him. Not today. I am grateful that Coleberg knew I wasn’t doing well. I am grateful that he was here to handle all of the bugs my brother left in the house. I draw my pillow close to me and shut my eyes tight.

My mind wanders everywhere, remembering every moment. It has been three hours since the Imperial Guard came by with my brother’s decapitated head. And upon hearing of the news, my brother’s vassals came running into the mansion demanding I see them. How outrageous. I think to myself.

I want to sleep.

I want to get rid of everything I have seen. I want to wake up in the morning and see my brother with his usual smiling face wait for me in the dining room. I want to wake up and think that this was all just a bad dream. That this was just a nightmare.

I shut my eyes tight and curl in my bed, under the covers. But my thoughts come back rushing into my brain again. They whisper words I can’t understand. Their voices ring in my head, sinister and full of hatred. They come into a chorus, ominously low and some, dangerously high.

The people outside are banging on my chamber door—shouting and screaming as they demanded me to get up and talk to them. Their loud knocks that echo around the room soon turn dissonant and the voices in my head overpower me. They take me into a dark place as they speak louder and louder—and louder.

The door bursts open, spewing out my butler, my maid, two knights and the one who made a scene—Lord Derek Remius.

I sit upright and look at my brother’s vassal in displeasure. “What is the meaning of this, Lord Remius?” I ask him. “It must be about something really important for you to barge into a lady’s bedchamber like this in the middle of the night,” I say to him. “Unannounced even,” I add.

Lord Remius clears his throat and stands straight as he fixes his suit. “This is a very urgent mat—”

“Did I not order you to keep unwanted guests away from my chambers, Coleberg?” I cut him off. Coleberg purses his lips and takes a deep bow. “I am terribly sorry, milady. This is all because of my negligence.”

“My lady! We should not prolong this matter! This needs to be addressed immediately!”

“How rude.” I click my tongue.

I can see Lord Remius’ face twitch slightly at my response. He must have been so shocked to see such a timid young lady go against him for the first time. “Excuse me? Did you just click your tongue at me?” He asks, seemingly offended.

I smile at him from where I was sitting and shake my head. “Oh no, it must have been your imagination, Lord Remius.”

How disgusting. I think unkindly.

“I-I guess it is?”

I laugh. “It was sarcasm, Lord Remius.”

“What? Lady Nerisia! We have much more important matters to discuss with! Instead of you trying to pick a petty fight with me, you should uphold your duty as the only Lady of the house and—”

“Excuse me?” I cut him off again. “Don’t you think you are being very rude, Lord Remius?” I ask him with a frown. “You barge in a lady’s chambers in the middle of the night without prior warning while she was mourning the loss of her only brother. And then you talk to me as if you are a person above me?”

My mind is a mess. The murmurs and the voices are getting louder and louder. They speak only to me and to nobody else. My hands are shaking but I hide them under the blanket. I wish he would not notice how nervous I am.

“I will call for you when I feel it is time to speak about this.”

“But my lady—!”

“Take him away.” I order my knights and they do as I say.

They grab Lord Remius by the arm and drag him out and away of my bedroom. When the doors close behind them, only Coleberg remained. He looks at me with concern as he walks toward me cautiously. I massage my temples and sigh. “Would you like a cup of chamomile tea, milady?” He asks.

“No thank you, Coleberg. You can go ahead and rest.”

But Coleberg remains standing beside me. I look up at him and his gaze turn warm. “I am terribly sorry for not being able to stop the commotion, milady. I know how much you wanted to rest today,” he says. “Especially after what—”

“It’s alright, Coleberg. You did your best.” I flash him a smile. Although it seems like he does not believe that I am truly alright. But I am thankful that he doesn’t question me further nor does he elaborate on the topic once more. He merely said his goodbyes and wished me a pleasant night before walking out of my room.

I am alone once again.

I don’t know when it had stopped but the voices in my head that spoke garbled nonsense disappeared. It was as if they weren’t there in the first place. I lay on my bed, sweat trickling down my forehead and I waited.

I waited for the ominous voices to come accompany me once again. I did not want to be alone because if I was, I would truly feel as though my brother had really gone and passed. I waited until the dark creatures lurking inside my head to whisper incoherent words to me again. But they never came. It was if they were telling me I was truly alone.

And so I cried until I could not cry no more.

♠♠♠

I sit silently in the parlour with tea sitting on a table in front of me. It has been a long time since I recalled that awful memory.

The memory of the first night I spent knowing that my brother was gone with the wind. “Would you like a refill for your tea, Lady Nerisia?” Marie asks me. I give her a nod and watch her move elegantly as she pours me tea.

I pick up the teacup and stare at the contents for a while. I notice Marie look at me with concerned eyes, but she does not speak. I smile to myself before I sipping on the teacup.

It tastes bitter…

I purse my lips and look out the window to the garden. The Seventh Prince. The man who killed my brother. The man who ruined it all. And the man I so despise.

Why don’t you just go and kill him? My brother appears before me, sitting across from me with a smile on his face. I notice the scar I left on his right arm when we were children and I notice another unfamiliar one.

I am far too powerless to do so.

Then stick to those with power. You can do it. You don’t have to do the killing yourself. Let other people do it.

I laugh. From the corner of my eyes, I can see Marie look at me in confusion. She does not see the ghost of my brother. She does not hear his voice. This is because he only speaks to me.

Think about it, Nerisia. There are other people who want him dead.

I guess you are right.

Then what are you waiting for? Avenge me. I know how much you hate him. I can see the colour of your hatred.

My hatred?

From there, my brother flashes me a smile and it sends chills down my spine. His smile was beautiful yet chilling at the same time. He walks toward me and places a cold hand on my shoulder. I stay still, afraid that a little movement would cause his disappearance. My brother leans in and whispers something in my ear.

It’s black. Dark and murky—your feelings. It’s twisted and very, very ugly. It is tied in your heart like little knots, looping and squeezing together forming a very tight and singular knot. You may not see it yourself, Nerisia, but I do.

I sit there in silence as my brother disappears from beside me, leaving me and my voices alone. “—Sia…” Something in me stirs as I recall what he said. It tugs slowly at my heartstrings and pulls at it albeit faintly. I don’t know what it is, but it is there.

“Lady Nerisia,” I am pulled out of my thoughts by Marie as she calls for my attention.

“Yes?” I ask.

“Lord Remius is here to see you,” she says softly.

It’s this dog again. What is his problem? I think to myself. “Should I let him in?” She asks. I wait for the consent of my voices, but they were not answering. I let out a burdened sigh and nod my head. “Let him in.”

Marie did not look too pleased with my decision, but she went ahead and did as I told her. Lord Remius walks into the parlour wearing an ironed suit and a top hat that mad him look twice as old as his age. He bows at me and greets me before I tell him to sit down.

“What brings you here, Lord Remius?” I ask.

Lord Remius clears his throat and looks me in the eye. “The vassals want to have a meeting with you present, my lady. It has been three years since the estate was managed by the butler. And we think that this is inappropriate. For someone like him to have authority over the entire estate—!”

“Lord Remius,” I cut him off with a warning glare. “I have the house seal. Coleberg does not make large decisions. He simply is the one handling the estate. We should not prat about anything if we don’t know the full story now, shall we?” I smile at him and he goes silent for a while.

But I knew he would not back down so easily. “This is outrageous, milady! Someone of higher status should lead and manage the estate! Not some butler of a household! Are you aware that a commoner like him could cheat and steal the money that should be used by the mansion?”

“Ah!” I gasp. “You are right. We should not let corrupt people like you have authority over managing the estate!”

“Exactly! That is what I—” he pauses. “—like me? Milady! are you insinuating that I steal money from the estate?” he asks angrily.

I cover my mouth with my left hand, pretending to be shocked. “I’m sorry, Lord Remius. Were you not talking about yourself?”

“I—”

“I am terribly sorry for misunderstanding, Lord Remius. It seems as though I need some more rest,” I say. “We shall talk about this in two days time. I will be at the meeting, so you do not have to worry.” I smile at him but he does not respond. His face was contorted as he looks at me with disdain.

“I think it’s time for you to go, Lord Remius. I am sure that Lady Keira wouldn’t want her husband to keep visiting the home of an unmarried young lady.”

He stands up in his seat with clenched fists and bows to me. “I-I’ll see you in the meeting, milady.”

“Yes.” I respond as I watch him walk out of the parlour. “Was it really okay to send him away like that, milady?” Marie asks innocently. I flash her a smile and pick up my teacup and I watched as Lord Remius storms angrily outside the mansion.

“It’s alright.” I say in response to Marie’s question before I sip my tea quietly.

It really is bitter…

MinariN

I have established an update schedule! TTC will be updated every Saturday at 12PM GMT/9PM KST. If there will be no Saturday update, then the chapter will be a little delayed and will be published on Sunday! Thank you so much for reading up to this point! I would really love to hear about what you think about it so far! Also, there might be a lot of grammatical errors since english is not my first/native language!