[I don't know what I'm doing.]

He was standing in the middle of the kitchen, holding a spatula, and staring at the mess he made.

[Fuck.]

There were broken egg shells littered all over the floor mixed with flour, the sink was overflowing, and smoke was coming from something resembling burnt charcoal.

He never knew how to cook, living off of take out and the occasional free meals at the distribution center. Hence, the mess.

 

----------earlier

When they arrived at his small dilapidated, run down apartment, it was almost eight. He opened the door and watched as their faces morphed into ones of pity as they took in his small and empty 60 square meters room. 

He looked at them with confusion.

[Oh you little pieces of shit. You disrespecting my house?]

"What? Is there a problem?"

The girl, Shin Yoosung, patted him on the shoulder, giving him a comforting look.

They didn't have much with them: Shin Yoosung holding an extremely fluffy coat and the boy, Lee Gilyoung, holding an empty insect box. 

He eyed the box warily. "Where did the bug go?"

[I fucking hate bugs. I hate them.]

Instantly, Lee Gilyoung yanked off the plastic lid. His face paled and he ran outside, disappearing from sight.

"Wait!" He pulled on his shoes and followed the boy, Shin Yoosung closely following him.

He found the boy crouched on the sidewalk scraping the squished remnants of what was the bug into his box. There had been a dark patch left on the pavement. He stood there awkwardly, not knowing how to comfort the boy.

[I hate bugs, but I hate crying kids even more. Don't cry, people will think I'm abusing you.]

Shin Yoosung had caught up and laughed gleefully once she saw the deceased bug. "Serves you right."

He stiffly patted the boy's head. "It's okay, you can just catch a new one. Eh...let's go back?"

They returned to the house, Lee Gilyoung trudging dejectedly in the back.

 

It was already half past eight, so he decided to make dinner. "What do you guys want to eat?"

"Kimchi fried rice!!" Lee Gilyoung burst out. He could almost see the boy salivating just at the thought of it. 

He walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge. It was practically empty, with a few takeout boxes, a carton of milk, and a few eggs.

"..." He walked to the pantry and opened it to find a similar result: a few boxes of instant noodle, chips, and bottles of water.

Shin Yoosung looked at him incredulously. "You don't even have rice?"

He avoided their judging looks and scratched his neck sheepishly. "I guess we need to buy the ingredients."

"Idiot."

[YOU are the fucking idiot.]

Lee Gilyoung whipped out a phone from who knows where and started typing rapidly. The boy tapped Shin Yoosung, whispered in her ear, then turned to him. "There's a store a few blocks away that's still open."

"Alright, do you know how to get there?"

Lee Gilyoung nodded. 

They left the apartment and he locked the door. He glanced at Shin Yoosung. "Are you going to bring that jacket with you? It's not that cold."

She nodded. "Self defence measures."

"...okay"

 

The market wasn't that far from his apartment, only a few minutes away. It appeared to be fairly new, a banner hanging askew on the doorway reading "Grand Opening", half open boxes piled up in a corner, and an extremely clean interior. 

The girl at the closest cash register lifted her head eagerly when she heard the bell on the door chime. She practically jumped over the counter in excitement. "Aww, you're so cute and puny!" 

[My heart can't handle being around so many people. Calm down Dokja. Calm down.]

He looked at the name tag on her shirt: 'Jung Heewon'. He didn't recognize the name. "Are you someone else I don't remember?" he asked.

She gasped and dramatically looked at Lee Gilyoung. "You told him?"

"Well he hasn't met us yet and we didn't even live in the same city, so it doesn't matter."

She smacked him on the head and Lee Gilyoung whimpered and held his head. "Well, what did you come here for?"

[I did not just witness child abuse. Nope not me.] 

He glanced at the recipe he had pulled up on his phone. "Kimchi, rice, onions, and spam. Oh, also rice."

She looked at him and he could almost spell out a-s-t-o-n-i-s-h-e-d on her face. "You don't have rice? Are you an idiot? What kind of asian doesn't have rice? And you are making bokkeumbap? Don't you usually make it with leftovers?" She turned to Shin Yoosung. "He doesn't have any rice or kimchi? Not even rice?"

"Nope."

"Oh my god! How have you survived until now?" She gave him a comforting pat. "You pitiful thing."

[I've been called an idiot, looked at like I am an idiot, and given comforting pats way too many times today.] 

He looked down at himself then at Lee Gilyoung who was still holding his head. "Do I look that pathetic?"

"Yes."

"..."

[I'll choose to ignore that. Fucking bitch.]

Jung Heewon snickered. "Do you know where to go or do you need help? You do know what kimchi and rice looks like, right?"

"...yes." He turned on his heel and walked into a random aisle. 

[Where is it. Where is it. Where is it.]

"The rice is in the 3rd row and the kimchi is on the last aisle", Jung Heewon called out from behind him.

He stiffly turned around and walked to the correct aisle.

--

"That'll be nineteen ninety-nine."

He lugged up the bag of rice that was way heavier than it looked and searched his pockets for his wallet.

[Oh no.]

"I don't have my wallet on me... I think I left it at home." He didn't see Shin Yoosung slip his wallet into her pocket.

Inside Shin Yoosung's head: [Gotta do anything to survive, even stealing oppa's precious money.]

“I’ll cover it then,” Jung Heewon sighed. “But you owe me one.”

“Thanks I guess.” He lugged the bag of rice up again and almost dropped it. 

[I think my bones are going to break.]

Jung Heewon glanced up at the clock: nine o'clock. "I can give you a ride." She took off her apron and hung it up. "Can you cover for me?" she asked a girl at a nearby register. 

"Are you serious? Just go."

Jung Heewon grinned and grabbed her keys. "Alright, what's your address."

"It's pretty close. Just head straight then turn left once you reach the park and it's the fourth complex.

 

They headed to her car and got in: he was in the front and the kids in the back. 

"So," Jung Heewon glanced at him, "do you have any hobbies? Like gaming, cooking, maybe reading?"

"No, I don't really like to do anything. I guess I like sleeping?"

[And cursing out people behind their backs.]

"Oh really." She turned on the radio and harsh rock music started to play out before she turned it to a gaming station. "Do you know the book Ways of Survival?"

"No." 

He leaned on his palm and looked out of the window, seeing that they had almost reached the park.

"...and a rising star by the alias of 'Sunfish' has been making his name known in 20XX's Star Championship. His debut match against Kim Namwoon..."

[pft sunfish. Who would choose sunfish as their stage name? At least go with something cooler, like a squid.]

"...Kim Yongpal, last years champion infamous for his impeccable cross dressing abilities, has speculated that he will have to hand over his title to the slow, but steadily advancing Yoo Joonghyuk..."

He jerked up.

[Yoo Joonghyuk? That name sounds familiar.]

He could feel three pairs of eyes staring at him and turned to meet their gazes.

Lee Gilyoung looked a little expectant as he asked "Do you know him? Yoo Joonghyuk?"

"I think I do. But I can't remember who he is."

"That's good. That's really good." Jung Heewon stopped the car. "We're here"

 

He got out of the car and unlocked the door to the apartment. 

"Where do you want me to put the rice?" Jung Heewon asked.

"The pantry is fine." He took out the eggs from the fridge and the spam and kimchi from Shin Yoosung.

Lee Gilyoung looked up at him. "Do you need any help?"

"No it's fine. You can go see if the tv works," he replied. "Are you going to stay for dinner?" he asked Jung Heewon.

She raised her hand in mock surprise. "Oops, I forgot to tell you my place is under construction so I'll need a place to stay for a few days. I'll cash in your debt now."

"Um..there might not be enough room and shouldn't you know other people-"

[Please get out.]

"No, it's fine." Jung Heewon roughly slapped him on his shoulder and pushed him into the kitchen. "Now go cook us food."

[I feel like a housewife.]

He stared at the ingredients on the counter.

[It can't be that hard.] 

 

---------present

[Yes it is. It is very hard.]

The faucet was still running and water was starting to overflow onto the floor.

Jung Heewon's head popped out in the doorway. "You look like you're struggling."

She walked towards him, jumping over the puddles and mush on the ground, and peered into the pan.

"We are not going to eat that," she said, turning off the stove and dumping the contents in the trash. "I'll call for take out."

He was frozen in shock when she threw away the cancer he made. "That...that was still edible," his voice trailing off at the end.

"..." She gave him a hard look. "Are you an idiot?"

He gave in and started cleaning up his mess, letting Jung Heewon place the order.

 

Ding dong. The doorbell chimed. They were laying on the couch watching a nature documentary.

"No! Run!" Shin Yoosung was crying as she peeked through her fingers at the tv. Lee Gilyoung was curled up on the sofa, covering both his eyes and ears. 

He watched the lion on the tv take down a zebra, sobbing in the background from the two kids and Jung Heewon dying of laughter next to him.

Ding dong.

He looked to the door, rolled off the sofa, and got up. "That's probably the food."

Ding dong.

"Okay, I'm coming." He opened the door.

A man was standing there, a baseball cap casting a shadow over his face, holding a bag of takeout.

[I'm getting kidnaper vibes from this guy. QAQ]

"Your food." The man handed him the bag. "It's already covered."

The man's voice was deep and sent shivers down his spine when he heard it. His ears felt tingly.

[Why does god give people such sexy voices while I sound like a prepubescent teen.]

"Thank you..um..." He looked up at the man, expectantly. 

[You give me free food? You are a good person.]

The man let out a breathy laugh. "Joonghyuk. Yoo Joonghyuk."

"Oh. Well thank you, Yoo Joonghyuk."

The man turned around and walked down to his car. 

He looked at the car. It looked way too expensive for any delivery man to own. It was then that he realized that the man had been wearing pretty expensive looking clothes, and he didn't realize it because of the hat.

[Joonghyuk. Yoo Joonghyuk!?]

He placed the food on the doorstep and ran after the man.

"Wait!"

The man looked up from inside of his car and once he saw him running at him, he immediately took off. 

"The fuck?"