Tsi Yi found that not all of his memories were incorrect.

In fact, almost none of them were, except, apparently, all the ones involving Han Xing Yue.

He could accurately guess where all the secret stash hideouts of contrabands were in their sect, he could recite the names of every disciple that passed his vision (minus newer initiates), he could even guess what everyone's dietary preferences would be during morning breakfast.

Everything was correct...except with Xing Yue.

Tsi Yi found out that the man was a refugee orphan from a city burnt down overrun by savages, alongside his older sister of five years, Han Suhua. Xing Yue was 2 and his sister 7 when they were rescued.

Because the Lan Xiu Sect's Internal Qi Manual was centered around Yang energy, females (who naturally grow with Yin energy) were unsuited for studying their cultivation techniques. As such, Suhua was unable to study alongside her brother, though they did permit her to live inside the sect because of Xing Yue's young age. She was allotted a little bamboo hut which she paid for by doing various servant work across the sect.

Xing Yue officially entered the sect on his 4th birthday, the same year Tsi Yi and Mo SuFang were recruited (orphans of a famine in the Northwest).

And so their childhood together began.

Tsi Yi had wanted to find out more but all the sect's upper hierarchy, including his Shifu and Mo SuFang, told him to take in new information slowly. As too much shock all at once could cause a Qi deviation[1].

Despite his previous anger, Tsi Yi -with his medical knowledge- knew that they were right, and as such did not pester them for more details about his "true" past for now.

His Shifu Xuanren Mei comforted him by explaining that as he diagnosed and repaired whatever had damaged his psyche in the first place, he was sure to remember everything soon enough. Especially now that he was surrounded by triggers of the past.

And so Tsi Yi's 'return' to Lan Xiu progressed.

Overall, he found it hard to integrate back into the sect after his imprisonment.

Growing up Tsi Yi had spent most of his childhood ostracized from the rest of the disciples alongside Mo SuFang but even he on occasion back then would receive some degree of socializing from his peers -he never showed dissent or made any definitive judgement towards anything after all, so people felt like he they could talk to him about anything.

This was perhaps the one thing he was better at than Mo SuFang. Whereas his outgoing bestfriend would quite often put his foot in his mouth growing up, Tsi Yi was too timid to ever say any of his opinions, dissenting or otherwise; if he had been just a little less awkward while conversing with others, had more social acumen overall, had disposable income like everyone else, Tsi Yi most assuredly would have been quite popular amongst his peers.

But that was then; this was now.

Now, after his imprisonment, Tsi Yi's awkwardness was ten times worst than it'd been before. It was like people came too close or too fast, spoke too loud or too aggressively. He could not meet people's gazes; he could not stop fidgeting under the gaze of others; he couldn't even stand up straight without a slight hunch -his entire being the overt victim of a psychopathic rapist.

Tsi Yi felt like an outsider now to the Lan Xiu Sect.

Especially at Yang Yu's funeral.

Though no one overtly said anything, Tsi Yi knew some blamed him for Yang Yu's death.

They must have.

Because he blamed himself.

He'd known Yang Yu for almost as long as he'd known SuFang. Basically, the nicest of all his other disciple brethren, the boy had never shown any degree of antagonism towards him, at best just not intervening when Tsi Yi was being bullied. And while that wasn't the best testament to the boy's character, Tsi Yi had never held this against Yang Yu. 

Tsi Yi understood because Yang Yu needed to survive in their sect too; he could not afford to befriend one of the pariahs without implicating himself as a target too. Therefore, he never blamed the boy and was grateful for any kindness he spared him-

NO FUCK YANG YU. FUCK THIS GUY AND ALL HIS HYPOCRISY.

Wh-what the hell, where had that voice come from?

Tsi Yi's entire being shook from head to toe as a cold shiver rang up his spine. Next to the grieving disciple brothers, all dressed in white, as they took turns to burn sheets of Joss Paper[2] alongside Yang Yu's grieving parents.

FUCK HIM AND HIS FUCKING COWARDICE.

Stop. Stop talking. I don't know who you are but stop, please. This is his funeral-

I CURSE HIM TO BE SENTENCED TO THE EIGHTEENTH LEVEL OF HELL[3] WHERE HE WON'T NEED TO WORRY ABOUT BULLYING EVER AGAIN.

STOP IT!!!!!!!!

Tsi Yi realized that everyone in the funeral procession were now turned to stare at him.

Oh, oh god, he'd said that last phrase out loud.

Tsi Yi's breath caught in his throat, a second before he bit his own lip.

They were all looking at him. They were all looking at him. Including Yang Yu's parents, his Shifu Xuanren Mei and Mo SuFang (the latter of which only flashing concern that Tsi Yi did not pick up).

Their eyes were condemning, yelling at him for his outburst but worst, Tsi Yi could tell some of them were thinking: 'Just who exactly did Yang Yu die for? How can you be so disrespectful?' 'Ingrate.' 'Ungrateful disciple brother!' 'Our son died trying to save this guy of all people?'

Tsi Yi felt cold sweat bead across his entire body as his mind pulsed at an impossible speed. He envisioned that all the blood must have drained from his face by now. Tsi Yi could not face these people.

In a second, he burst out of the Lan Xiu Sect's atrium, shoving anyone out of his way in the process.

I'm sorry -I can't -I'm not- I didn't mean- I didn't mean to- I didn't mean to- I didn't meant to- I didn't mean to- I DIDN'T MEAN TO!!!!!

Tsi Yi ran as fast as he could for as long as his legs would take him. Without any Qi, he could not travel through the air or fly on his sword, so he could only rely on his legs.

With how torrid his mind was, Tsi Yi could not identify whether or not someone had followed him out -unable to even consider this possibility until after he'd calmed down for a bit and was taking in his surroundings while he heaved short desperate bouts of air.

He was surrounded by evergreen sequoias. Distantly, he could hear a babbling creek. Tsi Yi knew this place had to lie outside of the Lan Xiu City gates. He'd made it this far without anyone chasing him back?

Just as he thought this Tsi Yi felt a shifting shadow somewhere in the tree branches high above him. Without turning, Tsi Yi was able to sense the person moving back and forth through the branches but at reduced heights, descending to meet him.

Thinking it was SuFang checking to he was okay, Tsi Yi turned around with a placating smile at the ready -only to be met with a flashing sabre heading towards his eyes.

***

[1] Qi Deviation = when internal energy runs amuck inside oneself and causes damage while doing so

[2]Joss Paper = ghost paper money burned during Chinese funerals, believed to let deceased ones buy their way through Hell before reincarnation

[3] Eighteenth Level of Hell = the worst more agonizing level of Hell, reserved only for the most sinful of souls to suffer for eternity without chance of reincarnation