Even though I planned to post a chapter weekly, I'm really sorry about the delay. I wasn't feeling very well; my asthma took a turn for the worse the previous week so I had to focus on recovering (trying to focus on writing or any task with breathing problems is quite difficult!) But I'm feeling a lot better now, and i'm back! Enjoy the chapter~

Just thought I'd add this. I'm sure a lot of people are wondering why he's so cold to her and it might even feel forced right now, because even I was wondering that at one point. But once this little recount of Neoma's life is over, it'll be made clear. Whether or not the reason justifies his actions is up to you, though!

"Such jealousy…!”

“She’s been replaced, hasn’t she…?”

“I wouldn’t be able to show my face after this, if I was her!”

“It must be humiliating.”

“To think she would harbour such selfishness.”

“She must be envious of princess Alvah’s beauty.”

“My deepest apologies, your majesty... I was not in my right mind; I have spoken out of turn and dampened the mood. I would like to kindly excuse myself and retire to my chambers for the night...”

My father dismissed me without even a glance.

That was how my short lived coming-of-age ceremony had ended. The taste of blood gushing from where I had bitten my lips as a means to hold back my tears and the snickering and gossips of the nobles digging into my back. In that moment, I knew from the nauseating feeling brewing at the back of my throat that things were going to become harder; that the tiny pieces of hope I had desperately clung onto had slipped between my fingers.

After that, it happened quickly; one event after another, like beads falling from a severed string.

Alvah had taken residence in the main palace, and within months, she was the talk of the kingdom. Everyone loved her; the maids, the servants, the nobles and the commoners alike. Maybe it was because of her humble origins. She was a breath of fresh air for the nobles and someone to relate to for the commoners. Even my stoic father had begun to weaken to her charms. They would often take long walks in the garden, something I only found out when I chanced upon them by the fountain. Neither of them acknowledged my presence, despite having stood in plain sight. Maybe I was invisible under her light. I felt like a lingering shadow that disappeared the moment she came into the picture.

The maids' harassments continued, only getting worse in light of a rumour that began circulating throughout the palace. The rumour that I was tormenting Alvah out of jealousy and spite. That I had threatened the maids to stop serving her, forced her to eat mouldy bread, made her stand for hours in the rain under the guise that it was etiquette training, and would taunt her for her lowly origins. Of course, these allegations were baseless, and held no truth. But my words bore little weight, and Alvah did not once deny or refute these rumours. I should have taken precautions when the red flags arose. When she would only stand up for me on circumstances beneficial to her, and I would be made out to be the villain despite having not uttered a single word. But I feigned ignorance. I always brushed it off as me being overly sensitive, and I would give her the benefit of the doubt, even though I knew deep down that her contradicting actions were tell tales of a warning sign.

Eventually, news of my mistreatment reached my father's ears, and I was brought to his office to be berated. I didn’t say anything, not a word. Speaking only made things worse and I had learnt this the hard way. It was then that my political engagement to the then crown prince of the neighbouring country was decided, and I was to be wedded when I turned 18.

Somewhere deep inside me, I suppose I felt a sense of relief. I was finally going to get away from the torturous kingdom where no one loved me; where I had acquired hate from people I didn’t even know, and lived my days under scrutiny. I had hoped that with this engagement, although arranged, I would finally have someone to rely on, and that we would grow to love each other with time. It was because of this new found hope that I was able to bare the remaining five years before my marriage. The painful, drawn-out five years that I had to spend cowering in my room in fear, as the rumours only grew and death threats ceaselessly made its way to my doorstep.

Amidst this, the bond between my father and my sister continued to grow stronger as his demeanour around her changed drastically. He would become the most loving and doting father when matters involved her; the way he treated me and her was like night and day, and in a manner that would lead you to think that I was a complete stranger. It would be a lie to say that I was never envious of her. Rather, I loathed her. Behind my carefully crafted smile, I wished her death; I wished that she quietly disappeared and had continued living the commoner life as she had been with her mother.

Of course, my wishes were never realised. Changing the past was impossible, and the present and future were beyond my control.

On the day of my solitary departure, in the company of just myself, the coachman and three knights to ensure I was safely delivered, I had hoped that my father would come to see me off. I gave him chances, numerous chances. I had greeted him as per usual in the morning, bidding him fare well, whilst indirectly reminding him that I was to leave for Agnar that afternoon. As could be expected though, and something my then naive-self feigned ignorance to, he never came. He didn’t even glance out the window. The only other person that was present, aside from the people accompanying me was my sister and her entourage. From an outsider’s perspective, it was simply a caring older sister seeing off her beloved younger sister, as she sobbed into a handkerchief, everyone fawning over her. Of course, that was only from an outsider's perspective.

“She’s so ungrateful, she has a lovely little sister that loves her so much that she’s crying to see her go, yet she remains with a poker face, no tears at all!”

“Well, what would you expect – she torments Alvah after all.”

“Alvah’s too forgiving! She even forgives the devil herself!”

That was what her real motif was. To once again paint herself as an angel and cast me further into the depths of everyone’s hatred.

I smiled. The me in that moment remained oblivious and accepted Alvah's kindness and love as genuine. Maybe it was because I had never received any love in this life that I couldn't tell apart a fake love from a real one.

“Alvah, you are welcomed to visit me”, I smiled; a smile that radiated no emotions. A perfect lady's smile.

I... shouldn’t have said that. If I had known prior to inviting my sister that she would have accepted my offer and made my husband’s kingdom her second home, yet again stealing my place to belong to, I would have told her to stay away. To save her tears and never step foot before me again; it wouldn’t have mattered what the people present thought of my conduct. Whether I was made out to be a villainess and scorned at even more than what I had already been receiving.

As long as I could have a place where I belonged to, I wouldn’t have cared at all.