“What an interesting creature you are, now please tell me you’re doing in my workshop.”

Michael began to panic, this thing was strong, incredibly strong. 

Maybe I can just bullshit my way out of this.

“Would you believe me if I said I came here to buy a coffee table?”

The manager laughed.

“No.”

Well, worth a shot. 

“Ok, so keep in mind I had no idea you were down here, so don’t get mad. I may have been looking for anomalous items.”

The manager groans.

“Yeah, you’re one of his alright.”

Getting off of Michael, she went back to working on the shelf she'd been putting together. 

“All of your kind are the same. Always taking what doesn’t belong to you. Or at the very least the smart ones of you do.”

“What do you mean by my kind?”

“I’m talking about you dumbass, and all the other yous.”

“What, like humans?”

“Humans? No, I love humans. That’s why they’re the only species I let them into my stores. I’m talking about you and the near infinite versions of you running around throughout the multiverse. All for some sort of ‘The Strong Will Survive’ test. Annoying is what it is, I can’t believe Order had the nerve to send you here though.”

I suppose that makes sense. If there are other dimensions then there’s bound to be other versions of Tommy. Although I don’t like how she's talking about me like I’m some kind of invasive species. What I’m still wondering though is why I’m still alive. 

Meh fuck it, she hasn’t killed me yet, I might as well ask her.

“Not that I’m complaining, but why am I still alive?”

She looked at Michael like he was crazy.

“Are you kidding me? Nobody sane just kills an apostle of Order. Well, at least no one who knows who Order is does it.”

“You keep calling me an apostle of Order, what does that actually mean?”

“Sorry, can’t tell you that. One of his rules, I’d like my body to not be torn apart and fed to rats. That guy kills gods for fun.”

“Fair enough.”

Michael paused in thought.

Despite killing Samuel and his group, this entity was surprisingly cordial. Probably thanks to  whoever this Order guy is. Perhaps he could make a deal with her? Probably not, but let’s just keep her talking for now.

“Where did you even learn about this whole apostle of Order thing?”
“I tried to open an IKEA in his domain. The results were, unimpressive.”

“Uh huh. Anyways, I mentioned I was looking for anomalous items earlier. You wouldn’t happen to have any you were willing to part with, do you?”

“Oh I got tons, but why should I give you any?”

“Well I could do a favor for you, is there anything you’d want from me?”

The manager's mood lit up instantly.

“Oh I know! Bring me new furniture from other dimensions, as much as you can get!”

She moved closer to Michael, far too excited.

“If you're going throughout the multiverse, surely you’ll find some good designs, bring them to me! Maybe I’ll finally be able to compete with Walmart again!”

She laughed evilly.

“Um, sure. What will I get in exchange though?”

The manager reached into her pocket, grabbing a golden key and tossing it to Michael.

“I’ll give you this for now, if you want anything else you’ll need to give me my new furniture first.”

She is way to into the furniture thing. 

“What’s the key do?”

“Oh, use it on a door and it will open to my workshop. Then you can bring me my furniture, make sure it’s something exotic, nothing human made. Now go away, I need to get back to work.”

“Well before that, could you turn my comrades back into people?”

“Oh sorry, that’s a one way process. One that you narrowly avoided I might add. I didn't notice who you were at first, so you better thank whoever gave you that crown. It has your soul locked up good and tight. I can't even get close to it.”

Huh, so that’s what it does. Lucky me I guess. 

“By the way, I came here with a skinny white monster guy, he should be wandering around somewhere. I wouldn't look at his face though, I hear he gets unpleasant when you do.”

“Oh that thing, I sent it back to your dimension a while ago. It destroyed hundreds of my products for absolutely no reason! The nerve of some people, I only wish I had seen it sooner. I could have tossed it out before it destroyed so many of my precious desks.”

So ‘Shy Guy’ got tossed back into my reality.

Uh oh.

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Michael left the workshop and made his way back down the corridor. The monsters that refilled the hall avoided him like the plague, probably ordered to do so by the Manager.

That meeting had went well, and also horribly at the same time. He’d once again gotten people killed. There's not much he could do about it, but it’s frustrating all the same.

First it was Alex, and now the entire raiding team he’d set up. Why do they all have to be so, fragile. Maybe I should look into getting more durable teammates, or maybe I’m just bad luck?

Michael examined the golden key in the fluorescent light. I wonder if it was worth it, a key and a deal. I guess I'll have to wait and see.

I should at least uphold my agreement with Samuel though, everyone left in that town is coming back with me to earth.

Hopefully the ‘Shy Guy’ won’t be too much of an issue once I get back. 

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Several foundation guards stood watch outside of a condemned IKEA. Chain Link fencing with signs periodically warning of black mold surrounded the perimeter. 

Amidst the silence, complaining could be heard.

“This is so boring, I thought this job would have more to do. Ya know?”

“Don’t whine, boring is good. I had a friend who had to keep watch over Able, tragic what happened to him.”

“I guess you have a point, doesn’t make me any less bored though.” 

The other guard sighed. 

“Wait look, the doors are opening.”

“For real?”

Both guards turned towards the entrance.

A tall pale figure slowly came through the door, blood covering most of its body.

It was crying into its hands, before turning towards the sky and releasing a deafening scream.

“What is that thing?”

The other guard was wide eyed, he recognized the creature.

“Fuck.”

It was upon them.

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When Michael finally made it back to the village, he was growing tired. It wasn’t a close jog and it took him several hours, but if he actually wanted to keep this deal, then the sooner he made it back the better.

The same scarred guard as before greeted Michael. 

“What happened to my people?”

“They didn’t make it.”

He raised his crossbow towards Michael, and Michael raised his shotgun.

“Then why are you still alive.”

“Apparently I’m kind of durable, I guess it comes with being a dimension hopper. Now lower your weapon, I came to fulfill my part of the bargain. Unless you decided this shanty town is where you want to spend the rest of your life.”

He lowered his crossbow, “No, take us away from this place.”

Michal smiled, “Good, now go get some rope. I’ll have y’all back on earth soon.”

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Thirty minutes later, Michael had a strand of rope connecting him to every person in the town. 

And not a minute too soon either, because the second the rope connected Michael to the last town member he began to feel a sense of weightlessness pulling on him, before space distorted and overtook his body, traveling down the ropes and dragging the villagers along with him back to earth.

 

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AN: If y’all are enjoying the story, I’d appreciate it if you left a rating. They give me dopamine. Other than that, thanks for reading!