The days pass by quickly.

I become even quieter. I only focus on my studies, and I am not being energetic as I was before.

After months pass my parents notice it and one day while eating dinner, my Dad asks,

"Ragu, why are you being so quite?  I mean... you always have been energetic. Now you are not like how you were before."

While Dad saying this he keeps smile because he is thinking about how I was before.

And my Mom says,

"I noticed it too. This isn’t like you. At first you were silent we thought it was because we scolded you and told you to stop focusing on drawing. But it has been months you are still like this."

I look at them with no expression and even my brother says,

"Yeah Ragu. It feels weird seeing you like this being so silent.”

After all three of them finish asking, I say,

"You wanted me to study so I put my all focus on that. I am not a topper in studies, so I am spending more time, that’s all.

After saying this I take my plate go to the kitchen to wash it. My parents and brother went to silent thinking how much I have changed.

After washing the plate, I got to my room, turn off the light and get into bed to sleep because I have already finished my homework.

This is how my life is.

After few days I have an exams. I study very hard and write the exams.

After a week Siva sir distributes the report card and exam papers.

In the evening when I get home, after my parents come home from work, I show them my report card.

They look my marks in the report card and they are both very happy and smiling.

I know that smile. Whenever my brother gives them his report card, I see the same smile because my brother always comes top three.

I wanted to see the same smile, because I am not good in studies, with my passion in art I though I can see the same smile, and proud from my parents.

I am happy that my parents proud of me and seeing the smile I always wanted to see.

But I am not smiling.

I am not happy.

But at least they are happy.

My Dad says,

"Wow Ragu, I am so happy. Now you know that you have the same potential as Bala. See, you got good marks.”

Then my Mom says,

"Your father said everything I wanted to say. We are happy Ragu. Study like this, you will have a bright future."

I simple says,

"okay."

After saying this, I go to my room and lie on my bed.

My life is become boring.

The Kind of  life no one wants to live and no one wants to hear or read about.

Then after 2 months, the public exams comes.

My brother attends every exams. He says questions are little tough but he did great in the exams.

And I have completed my 7th standard.

After the exams, Bala isn’t at home all the time. He goes out with his friends every day, even go to nearby places.

Meanwhile, I just simple at home, watching cartoons on TV the whole days.

My neighbor friends want me to play with them, but I am not in mood so I say no.

Now I am free from studies, my brain starts to remains me to drawing.

I am struggling not to think about it, but I can’t.

Not only that, now I start to notice all the drawing that I put on the walls inside my house.

I quiet shock of how I missed this when I throw all the things that are connected to my drawing.

I remember I throw my drawings that I put on my room walls.

But there are drawing paper in the living room, in my brother’s rooms and in my parent’s room and in the kitchen.

Seeing those makes me sad and too angry.

So I gets up take all the drawing paper that I put into the all the walls one by one, and put those into the trash can.

I cannot stop thinking about drawing.

So, after my parents came home at evening, I say first thing.

"I want to join a class. I don't care what is it about. I don't like sitting around doing nothing."

Both of shocked because last year they wanted me to join an English class at summer leave, but I was very stubborn and said that I wouldn’t go. But now I am asking them.

My mom says,

"Is that you asking?. Last year you were stubborn about not going to the English class when we asked you, but now... why?

I says,

"Like I said, I don't want to sit around doing nothing."

My Dad says,

"Why you have to sitting around, you have the whole day. Play with your neighbor friends, or watch cartoon, do what you like.”

He stop talking for a second and says

"You can draw if you want".

With him, my Mom says in agreement,

"Yeah Ragu, you did good in exams. Now you are on summer leave, and you have so much time, so draw anything you want, we won't scold you."

Then my Mom comes closer and says,

"The only reason we scolded you is because you stopped focusing on studies. Other than that you can draw in your free time. We can buy you things for drawings."

My Dad talks with smile,

"You throw all the things that you used for drawings. We never told you to throw it away but you did. So how about we buy you new drawing pencil, and paints and drawing sketchbooks?."

Then my mom says,

"Because now you understand us and focus on studies,  how about we let you join in drawing class? Once school opens, you can draw, but only in free time after finishing your homework and you should focusing on your studies. You can draw on the leave days or in free time.

We won’t scold you.

We promise, Ragu.”

My Dad smiles as if he is agreeing with my mom.

I Looks at them and simply says,

"I will join any class you want me to. No drawing."

I go to my room after saying this.

My parents are shocked by my answer. Now they are giving me the green signal but I am giving the red signal.

I lie down on my bed and think even if I join a drawing class, it is waste.

Once school opens, I have to only put my all focus on studies not on drawing.

If I start to draw again, I am afraid I will go back to my old self, giving more focus to drawing than studies, the one who was happy all the time.

I turn to my left and lie there.

After few more minutes with these thoughts of pain, I suddenly sleep.

At dinner time, my Dad comes into my room and sees that I was sleeping. He sits besides me on the bed and tries to wake me up by calling my name.

"Ragu... Ragu.. wake up kid. It is dinner time."

But I am in deep sleep.

I do not even move.

So my Dad gets up from the bed, goes out of my room, close the door and tells my mom that I am sleeping  and not waking up.

Then both of eat dinner and my brother Bala is staying with his friends house today.

While both of them eating Mom says to Dad,

"I am so happy that Ragu starts to focusing on studying but I totally hate how he is being now.”

After my mom said this, my Dad stops eating, looking at the plate, he says,

"Me too..."

Silent for a second, he looks my Mom and says,

"He become like this when we told him to only focus on studies. He is very happy when he draw something, but that does not give a bright and safe future. Now he studies well but.... he has changed completely."

Mom stays silent for few more seconds and says,

"And now he wants to join any class except drawing, even though we let him join in drawing class."

My Dad says,

"What we should do now about the class he wants to join? He said no to drawing."

My dad give a big sigh and says,

"I totally hate Ragu being like this."

The my Mom and Dad become silent for a minute, and my Mom says,

"Now we can join him in an English class and any other class. And I have a idea. Within few months, his birthday going to come, so how about we buy him a new set of drawing pencil, paintbrushes and sketchbooks?".

After my mom said this, my Dad thinks about it and says,

"That's great idea. And we will try to talk with him whenever we got free time so he can become his old self again."

My mom reply with smiles,

"Yeah, we have to do that? I want to see my son smile again and how he gives headache all the time to us."

They both smiles agreeing it.