The half-elf's eyes widened in shock when he caught a glimpse of me, and his jaw nearly dropped.
He clearly didn't expect my human form to look like this, especially since he had just seen me as an ordinary cat.
I had a thin tomboyish appearance. This was rather atypical for a nekomimi1A catgirl (猫娘, nekomusume) is a female kemonomimi character with cat traits, such as cat ears (猫耳, nekomimi), a cat tail, or other feline characteristics on an otherwise human body. (See Wikipedia), particularly since there was an over-saturation of big-breasted MILFs2MILF is an acronym that stands for "Mother I'd Like to Fuck". (See Wikipedia), flawless jade-skinned celestial beauties, or tiny 12-year-old goth lolis on the server. Many players preferred game avatars that they were visually attracted to, so voluptuous women with giant bubble butts and F-cup chests were disturbingly common.
When people thought of catgirls, they typically imagined something kawaii3Kawaii ('lovely', 'loveable', 'cute', or 'adorable') is the culture of cuteness in Japan. (See Wikipedia) and fluffy like a sex kitten.
In contrast, plain-looking women with unattractive stick shaped bodies were a minority.
I didn't make my avatar particularly feminine because I wanted to be able to crossdress convincingly as either gender. It was more practical to have an unremarkable face so that I could slip through crowded areas without attracting too much attention. Moreover, I wasn't exactly thrilled about getting my genitals groped by random strangers in public.
The half-elf's gaze darted over my body, trying in vain to make out the outline of any perky breasts, but he couldn't find any.
I was completely flat-chested.
Moreover, I was a man.
I furrowed my brow and placed the bucket of leftovers on the countertop. The staring was a little rude, but I was used to those types of quizzical looks after living on Vetita for six years. People often asked me if I was male or female, and often I retaliated with most frustrating non-answers that I could think of. I ignored the half-elf entirely and searched around the pantry cabinets for small wooden bowls.
A short delay later, the half-elf suddenly seemed to remember that I saw him rummaging through the bread crates.
"This isn't what it looks like!" He blurted out desperately.
I simply nodded and continued with my work.
Many of the wooden bowls weren't washed very well the last time they were put away, so they had splotches of black stains and thin layers of grime. I wasn't going to feed with the slaves with soiled dishes, so I piled the bowls in the sink and turned the faucet. To prevent my clothes from getting dirty, I rolled up the sleeves to my shawl and grabbed a rough sponge.
The half-elf was flabbergasted.
"I wouldn't steal. I was just checking on the quality of the bread." He insisted weakly.
Well, this was extraordinarily awkward.
I tried to change the topic while continuing to scrub at the dishes in the sink.
"Was the water hot enough for you to do laundry, by the way?" I brought up something random. "If you need me to heat the wash basin next time, I don't mind doing it every once in a while. It's a pretty effortless task for me."
Hopefully, he would catch the hint.
Unfortunately, the half-elf was too dense and didn't quite understand that I turning a blind eye to his bread thievery.
"Just please don't tell your master." The half-elf continued pleading with me. "If I get reported again, the guild will confiscate all of my belongings and I'll end up in debt bondage. I can't afford to pay those steep rates. I don't have the stamina to work in the mines, and I'll end up as a slave again."
I suddenly spun around and stared straight into the young mercenary's eyes.
I honestly couldn't care less if he was sneaking food from the pantry. Maybe the @Jasper from yesterday would have been upset, but I had different priorities at the moment. It was almost pointless to sell slaves now, and this half-elf could take all the crusty bread he wanted to eat. The Felicity wouldn't need its supply of slave rations, so none of it mattered to me.
"Hm? Did you say something? I'm not quite sure I heard you. Didn't see anything either."
There was a slow drawl of feigned ignorance in my voice.
The half-elf blinked at me in confusion.
I shrugged and shut off the faucet. Since was I finished with washing, I dried the bowls with a little heat magic and stacked them in a pile. I unceremoniously walked out of the pantry after I gathered everything together.
⚘ ⚘ ⚘
The dungeon was located in the lowermost section of the ship.
It was generally kept dark unless one of the crew members was present.
There were three soundproofed interrogation rooms and a wide communal holding area that contained two large cell blocks which faced each other. Depending on whether the prisoners agreed to pay @Jasper's ransom, slaves were sorted into the right side or the left side.
As the oil lamps flickered on, it was plainly obvious that one side of the prison was better than the other.
On the left side, there were a dozen shivering slaves. They looked terrified and traumatized, but they were mostly unscathed.
On the right side, it was an ugly mess.
The mercenaries were allowed to toy with any of the slaves in the cell block on the right side, so the prisoners were abused to different degrees. As a rule of thumb, they only focused their attention on one victim at a time, since they mainly sought to frighten the rest of the slaves. For instance, the transgirl that the mercenary had tortured with illusion magic was chained in a contorted position in the center of cell, as if intentionally put on display. Her unconscious naked body was marked with a variety of transphobic slurs and vicious whip lashes, and her pale skin was plastered with a variety of questionable fluids. Some kind of blunt object was inserted into her rectum.
I shined my glowing orb of magical light towards the rest of the prisoners in the same cell, and they were collectively a wreck of tears and dried semen. There was a mixture of shackled women and men from a variety of different species. A large number of them were likely also transgender, but they had likely learned by now that it was dangerous to be publicly outed in this server. Transphobia was violent and pervasive in this virtual community, and many toxic mercenaries went out of their way to target certain groups. Ironically, prisoners were often treated better if they claimed they were cisgender men roleplaying as women, and the fiercest altercations occurred when a transgender slave insisted on her pronouns.
This experience was probably nothing like what the prisoners imagined. Vetita had an international player base with many individuals from more conservative non-Western cultures. It also attracted a large population of neo-Nazi's who practically worshipped freedom of (hate) speech. Submissive players probably fantasized about some kinky sex — and honestly I had those fantasies too — but the mercenaries weren't here to indulge in erotic fantasies. Their objective was to get underneath a slave's skin, and they exploited any method to break a victim's psychological will to resist.
"Please! Let me out! I'll pay the ransom! I don't want to be on this side!" One of the girls blurted out as soon as they saw my glowing orb of light.
I glanced at the prisoner who had cried out in a frantic fit of hysteria.
"Wait a minute," I spoke softly. "I'll transfer anyone to the left side after I'm finished here."
I unlocked the door to the cell block on the left.
The shivering prisoners stared at me, particularly since this was probably their first time seeing another slave on the Felicity. Furthermore, I looked and sounded feminine. It was probably painfully obvious to them that I was treated extremely well, and even my clothes were clean and good quality. They probably had no idea that slavery could come in so many different shapes and sizes.
I placed the buckets of food and the bowls in the middle of the cell.
I heated the pot of meat stew with my fire magic, causing it to simmer and waft up with an enticing aroma.
This type of treatment came straight out of @Jasper's playbook. My master believed in a carrot and stick philosophy, and positive reinforcement was often times just as effective as brandishing threats. This was the main reason why my owner never personally participated in abusing the prisoners, and he always left the dungeon when the mercenaries were having their fun. He wished to be viewed as a "good cop" and trustworthy enough to bait the slaves into paying the ransom.
The slaves on the left side of the dungeon were generously fed twice a day, whereas the slaves on the right side would go hungry until they looked malnourished.
It was an extremely simplistic yet effective method of breaking in slaves.
I emptied the waste buckets and changed out the dirty water.
When I got to cleaning up the cell block on the right side, one of the chained girls glared at me with an intense look of hatred in her eyes.
"You're the cat from that night." She whispered spitefully.
Her hands were shaking, and I inferred from the bodywriting smeared across her face that she was the other "confirmed" transwoman the mercenary had mentioned on the ship's bridge this morning.
"There was that stray cat. It was purring until someone would let it into our camp. I'm sure it was you."
I paused for a moment. It was unusual for people to recognize my feline form after just seeing me once.
"And so what if I am?" I responded quietly.
"I picked you up and fed you bonito flakes4Katsuobushi (Japanese: 鰹節) is simmered, smoked and fermented skipjack tuna (Katsuwonus pelamis, sometimes referred to as bonito). (See Wikipedia). Is this how you pay us back? By setting everything on fire?"
There was pure spite in her chilly voice.
"All of this is your fault," she spat. "Do you think this is funny? Is it amusing to trigger transgender people? @Trisha came here because she was struggling with dysphoria and suicide on Earth. If that girl actually kills herself because of those fucked up hallucinations, guess who played a role in that."
"Mhm."
I continued scrubbing the dried semen from the floor.
I knew a lot more than I cared to admit.
But I stayed silent.
⚘ ⚘ ⚘
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I am binary transgender Votes: 24 15.4%
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I am nonbinary/genderqueer/genderfluid/other Votes: 16 10.3%
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I am agender/genderless Votes: 6 3.8%
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I am questioning or unsure about my gender Votes: 15 9.6%
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I am cisgender but gender non-conforming Votes: 3 1.9%
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I am cisgender but I fantasize about being the opposite sex Votes: 33 21.2%
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I am cisgender but enjoy reading gender bender Votes: 38 24.4%
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I am cisgender and not interested in gender bender Votes: 6 3.8%
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I do not wish to respond Votes: 15 9.6%
I will be honest, you would think that people would have learned by now that in this world there is no real happy ending. Or at least you do not have a right to a happy ending. There will ALWAYS be at least 1 person that hates you for some stupid reason.
That trans person screaming about the cat that burned down they're camp should have realized that they would have it worse in the game then in real life and that nobody would give a crap. Just like how nobody gives a crap that I have autism and personally I am fine with that.
In the end it was naive for her think that she would live a happier life in the game and screaming profanities at your captors was a bad idea.
If it was anybody else on that ship, she would have had her teeth knocked out.
Thanks for your comment! I think people have a variety of different worldviews, and it's always painful when something doesn't match up with the way that they believe or expect.
Can get more b/b story recommendations ao3. I also don't like manly romance. I enjoy feminine boys we much. I also like femdom. But the problem I find slot of them are fan fics. And I don't watch many tv shows and animes. So I usually filter with original work.
Yup! I do the same! Felixryder posted a number of new BL novels with a similar theme as this story, so you can check them out if you're looking for more m/m story recommentations! https://www.scribblehub.com/profile/53659/felixryder/
I identify as male, but would prefer to have a body that I personally am attracted to, which would be female. Still gonna keep my d*ck, but I would probably enjoy shapeshifting to experience a variety of bodies.
Its rather interesting to see a normal person's view of the darker side of the web.
Altough I'm not too deep either, due to my occupation I have personally seen quite a lot about things that do happen down there, both legal and illegal.
I think this chapter is a perfect example of naiveness of modern culture about humanity and history. Well, being naive is both a good and a bad trait, so hey, a nice point to think about.
Thanks for your comment!
Out of curiosity, did you feel like the chapter was too naive of a depiction? Or the characters were naive? I actually have zero personal knowledge with the darker side of the web/world, although I've been trying to research what I can. Some of my friends were telling me about what homophobia was like growing up in Russia, etc.
I didn't want to go too far in either extreme in terms of making it excessively ugly or excessively pristine. My understanding of many of these places is that they are somewhere in between, but it's not like I know for real!
If you have experiences or impressions that you're willing to share, I'd love to hear!
@uenala sure, its not easy to get it trough text but I shall try
It is quite naive for anyone to go to a lawless, free anarchical place and expect strangers to be good to you. The "kind strangers and peasants" depiction is a romantic ideal. While some cultures had aspects of helping travellers out, that was extremely rare and only in the near past when international trade was already common.
As for hate and such, I guess it would be impossible to talk about that in comments while being on the same page, short text is just not enough.
I believe your attempt at conveying your feelings about it are somewhat ignorant, but not wrong or misguided. I quite like it.
Then again, all this are my opinion and not a fact. Nothing you say is wrong, it is merely a small bit of a difficult topic which is beyond human comprehension.
I would also add that I'm a realist, so that that as you will.
Hatred can take many forms, but hatred is not a real emotion. It is a compound of other emotions.
I do not know where you take this story after this, so it wouldn't be honest of me to comment on other aspects of your novel that did not have their effects materialised yet.
All I can do is encourage you to continue.
If you wish to hear more about things I cannot write openly about, you can find me.
@uenala i think the biggest inconsistency that i see yet is you built a seemingly lawless world, but this world seems to have the same wqualities as the real world. Independent minds can and do live semi or full permanently in it and there is a constant stream of non/less extreme people entering.
As humanity is, such anarchy would simply not be able to stand around for a long time, and no structure could stand this level of extremism with these two factors. Deradicalisation is inevitable and rules would create themselves from the constant losses from conflict.
Perhaps the only way for this situation to be permanent is if its enforced from the outside by "the gods".
@Feather Ah, your feedback sounds similar to the types of things that @UnknownReader has been telling me!
I think I'll try my best to illustrate the non-extreme elements of the server. I also believe that most people still generally live normal lives in even "extreme" places (i.e. Islamic State, North Korea), and in general I think the average player would see a lot of frightening things yet probably not experience it for themselves.
I think another concept that sits on my mind is "normalization".
For instance, on modern day Earth, pro-slavery views are typically seen as radical/extreme. However, if it is sufficiently normalized, then a society or culture no longer views it as extreme, and slavery can exist broadly in a place like Vetita. Similar things can be said about patriarchy/racism/xenophobia/sexism. Depending on the culture, it could be viewed as "extreme" or broadly widespread to the point that it is accepted.
I agree in premise that a "extreme/radical" entities typically do not control states for long periods of time, and even if they do, they ultimately become the new normal. Furthermore, violent persecution of minorities (whether they be LGBT or something else) has consistently occurred in most civilizations/cultures in history, and it has resulted in historical events such as the 1947 partition of British India into India (Hindu) and Pakistan (Muslim). It's very rare that these partitions result in a third "moderate" block, if only because I think most moderates tend to side with the faction that is convenient/practical for them. For instance, if "gay marriage" as a political subject doesn't personally affect you, why care whether it is legalized or not? As long as there is social value in virtue signaling, pragmatic individuals will ostensibly support the prevailing culture.
Conceptually, I see communities on Vetita self-segregating and forming their own micro-nations. I don't tend to think that there would be very much blending or co-existence. At some points, the protagonist might be traveling within "conservative" airspace and at others through "liberal" airspace, but I think these factions would generally be hostile to another.
The demographics of Vetita are also by no means guaranteed to reflect those on Earth. For instance, what do you think the gender ratio on a server like Vetita would be? Personally, I don't believe it would be 50-50 as it is on Earth, and I think that has ramifications for the type of culture that would arise. Likewise, (maybe I am just pessimistic), but I don't tend to think that most modern US liberals would be interested in a ruleless anarchy server. Without admin moderation/authority to enforce desired rules, I think the liberal interest would quickly drop and players would ultimately leave. The environment seems much closer to the political ideals of right-wing militant anarchists who believe in vigilante justice (i.e. lynching), freedom of speech, self-defense, and gun rights.
I also have this "displacement theory" (idk what it's formally called since I don't study social sciences).
Specifically, I believe that as the real world becomes more regulated (i.e. laws that protect minorities or ban hate speech), the bad actors don't magically disappear. Racist people don't disappear just simply because anti-discrimination laws exist, and even if they are blocked from expressing themselves in real life, and they are instead shunted to other channels where they express themselves -- mainly anonymous digital spaces.
It's for reasons like these that I tend to believe that places like Vetita would be oversaturated with reactionary political beliefs and counter-culture demographics. If Earth is effective a banning certain things, then I can only imagine that opposition sentiments would arise in alternative spaces.
When I think alt-right people who I've interviewed on Omegle and other places, many of them express fears of losing their job for the things that they say -- and I spent some time imagining how they would react if they genuinely did get fired. It fuels the anti-left hatred that they hold and drives this powerful sentiment that bleeds into online spaces.
@uenala wow, this kind of large block of text why i wrote it this isn't exactly a good place for such discussions, but i will try to answer for you sincerity
Most of what you said is true, but these beliefes are strongly from a western perspecive, more than you could believe.
As for "right-wing militant anarchists" being the extremist in the vr scape: that is extremely untrue. most conservatives (in us cultural sense) are from to "sligtly bigoted but not too harmful" type religious people, who would never ever play a game such as this.
Most "pro gun activist" are anti-centrists or liberal, but gun activism is common across all political sides except authotorians.
If the current usa landscape holds any merit, vigilate justice is just as common on the left if not more since modern times.
Anarchism is not even right-wing. Anarchism is the libertarian extreme of both sides on the political compass.
Basically any of these arguments could be just turned around if you use different words anyway.
Extremists are very similar regardless of idology and their numbers depends on which brainwashing source you attend.
btw, the "US liberal" term is itself extremely undefined and they are not liberal. They hold some specific liberal views, but only those that can be abused by authotorian laws.
I would expect most people playing this game would be those who don't actually hold extremists ideological beliefs or so defranchised that they cannot hold much authotority in game.
As for leaving and dropping out, yes, but that is also true for everyone else. The only people who will stay are those who consent to play the part of the loser for a chance of becoming the victor. Basically those who are into or accept semi-consentual sadism and and masochism at the same time. Real "evil" extremists would not be able to stay for long because their idology goes against this.
Gender-ratio? In such a world that is a self-correcting problem in itself and your assumptions are kinda bigoted :P Gender related problems will die out soon as technology progresses enough to make it irrevelant. (except some rare real world extremities of course)
TLDR: USA mainstream politics are not even properly defined and both sides are trash. Vote Jasper for president. (edit: removed @ cause it tagged a real account here)
Normalization: becoming better is easier to normalise than becoming worse
Then again, the problem that I have that the desyncronized minds are a giant cultural shift themselves that cannot be predicted or understood without actually experiencing it. This is the biggest unknown and the reason I find your story interesting.
Is the person who lives unsycronised for year the same person? Do they "die" when they resyncronise? Does an unsyncronised mind deserve to be gone or changed into something else it dosent want be?
I think the whole who is who and idologies talk is interesting, but they are just the background, a justification to explain why this "other world" exists. It is the world that is important, because now it does exists, regarless of how and why. It is in your hands and our mind.
Technology, feelings and minds.
@Feather Thank you for your comments! I feel like you definitely have a different perspective, and I'm totally aware of the fact that my views are biased by a Western (left-leaning) perspective. It's really helpful and interesting to hear that you don't think bigoted conservatives wouldn't play a game like this.
I wasn't aware of gun activism being common on all political sides... it's just too far outside of my bubble. The mainstream Democratic party platform is strongly anti-gun, but I didn't realize there were many left wing factions that were pro-gun.
Your mention of the libertarian extreme was also very helpful for me.
Regarding synchronization -- I sort of viewed synchronization purely from the perspective memories coming in the form of dreams. I suppose people can change dramatically after having a big dreams?
@uenala Well, you kinda underestimate syncronization then. Something like that is worldchaging on the level of the singularity.