No, Benjamin was not my soulmate. We had a frantic and sweaty couple of months until we each went home for summer break. Long distance worked well enough at first, but midway through the summer we just drifted apart, and around the beginning of August we had a phone call that ended things, more or less amicably. I saw him around campus after that, but it was never quite the same.

Don’t get me wrong — I was heartbroken, for a little while, and then only sad, and finally okay. I had friends to support me, and before long there was Chris for two years, Alan for six months, and last of all, Steven, six years and going strong. We’re getting married next week, and I couldn’t feel more blissed out than I do now.

Technically speaking, this was all still the trial period for this change. If I wanted to, I could go back to Evelyn and tell her no thanks, go back to being Fat Brian, and the last nine years would vanish. The thought terrifies me, and so I slipped the golden key into the front door of the house that Steven and I share, walked down the hall, up the stairs, and into Evelyn’s office, one last time.

I told you, back at the beginning of the story, that I had made a lot of bad decisions in my life. Making this life reality was not one of them. But I have one last decision to make. Should I let go of my past entirely? Twist the ring, cast the Brians aside, and be completely and fully Alice? Or should I let that past remain, informing my actions, reminding me of what I gave up and what I have learned?

“I’ve decided,” I told Evelyn.

“Yes?”

“I’m ready to commit to this change,” I told her. “It still bothers me who I used to be. I feel ashamed of it. But that’s a good thing, you know? It’s a warning not to go down those paths. I’ve seen who I was at the end of them, and I didn’t like it very much. That knowledge needs to be a part of me, if I’m going to appreciate who I am now.”

“For some people, forgetting is the final step of healing. For others, it is a loss of self so complete as to be unthinkable.” Evelyn shrugged. “It doesn’t matter to me. You should do what you think is right.”

“I’ve decided,” I said again. “Make the change permanent.”

She extended her hand, and I took off the ring. It felt so strange to be without it. The ring had been on my finger for nearly ten years, never off. I might as well be naked.

“If you ever need anything else changed, please let me know,” Evelyn said.

“About that,” I replied, cutting in before she could send me back. “If I asked for a change now, that new change would be the fixed point, right? And the new Precedents and Dependents could really mess things up. I could lose my friends. I could lose Steven.”

With a sad smile, Evelyn nodded.

I shook my head. “I don’t want that. I don’t want any more changes. The life I have now is to valuable, too precious to risk.”

“You never have to use the key.”

“I don’t even want the temptation.”

“Are you sure? Once you’re locked out of Debug Mode, it’s unlikely that you’ll ever find your way back.”

“I’ll miss you, Evelyn. Thank you for everything.”

Her words were spoken with warmth. “And I will miss you, Alice. It has been a pleasure helping you.”

We clasped hands, and the world dissolved around me.

I was standing in front of our house, facing a door which was now missing its golden keyhole. The door looked naked without it, like my bare finger. I felt a pang, but my choice was made, and it was the right one “I got the mail,” I announced as I came inside.

Steve was in the easy chair, playing Smash Brothers on his GameCube Classic. “Anything good?”

“Not much. Ads. Bill.” I looked more closely. “It’s from the photographer.”

He paused the game. “The photographer?”

“Uh huh.” I sat on the arm of the chair.

“For the wedding?”

“Mmm hmm.”

He reached out and took me in his arms, and I melted into him. We kissed. Here was my soulmate, the future I had chosen out of all the countless possibilities presented to me. The memories of the people I had been remained in my mind, but I knew that every version of me would agree. At this moment, I was the luckiest woman in the world.