Camellia slipped from a dream and woke.

She startled.

Cernunnos hovered over her. “We’re going to speak to Adalhard in an hour. I asked him to keep it between us since we don’t know if the thing has any more disciples in the AAH.”

Camellia propped herself up. “It likes historians and anthropologists. It said so.”

“Wonderful.” Cernunnos knelt by her bunk. “Do you think you’ll be able to attend the meeting?”

Camellia nodded.

“You’ve slept the whole trip. I’ve been pretty worried. How’s your head? Any trace of that thing?”

“No.” Camellia sat up. “The blueprint and the magic circle are gone.”

“I’m glad of that.”

Camellia murmured her agreement.

Cernunnos shifted. “Alright. Get a wash. Change your clothes and get some food. You won’t inspire confidence like that.” Cernunnos squeezed her shoulder. He stood up and turned to leave. Then, he turned back. “Camellia, why did you take a three month leave?”

“I was ordered to. By a board of my peers,” Camellia said. Oh no. She avoided Cernunnos’ eyes.

“And, why? Why did they decide you needed leave?”

Camellia looked at her lap and clasped her hands. “I didn’t handle my mother’s death well.”

“No, no.” Again, Cernunnos knelt. He sought her eyes. “I checked the dates. You mother died mere days before the hearing. No one would expect you to handle things well after three days. And, you left the AAH to see your mother. You weren’t present when they decided to judge you. What really happened?”

Camellia grew quiet. Briefly, she looked at Cernunnos. He waited, watching her with narrow eyes.

She turned her gaze back to the floor. “While I was away, visiting my sick mother, someone opened my room. Apparently, they wanted to leave me flowers. I’d rather they’d left well enough alone.”

Cernunnos held his breath and waited.

“Whoever went inside found some…drawing I did a long time ago.” Camellia paused. She knew Cernunnos would find the statement odd. She wasn’t an artist any more than the other anthropologists. Beyond sketches of people, artifacts, and places, Camellia didn’t make art. Yet, that thing she’d made – all over her walls – was not a detailed, precise drawing of something real. It was a representation of a nightmare.

Camellia went on. “I don’t remember doing it, but after Sorin died in Vetoin Country, I drew on my walls.” Camellia stared at her lap and twisted her fingers.

After her escape from Vetoin Country, she remembered how she had arrived home and received a box of Sorin’s things. Inside, she found her little Obsidian Mirror. Unable to rescue Sorin from a large and now broken version, deep in Vetoin Country, Camellia hoped to learn something from the small one. What she didn’t realize is how different the experience would be through her own eyes, without Sorin’s mind as a shield.

Camellia had come out of that dream, barely aware of her surroundings and hallucinating. That’s when I must have drawn on the walls.

Etched in black, the entire macabre work displayed a forest. Shadowy, leafless trees with tall straight trunks rose from the molding. Other shadowy figures peered from the forest, and where galaxies should be, eyes punctured the sky, with one great eye in place of the wormhole. Words ran in streams, anywhere they fit. Camellia had taken one look at her creation and, after a moment of horror, dismissed it. Yet, she resolved to explore the mirror further.

“What did you draw?” Cernunnos asked.

“A forest,” Camellia said.

“That’s not so bad.”

“Well, it was a horrible forest.”

“Okay.” Cernunnos touched Camellia’s hands and stopped her from twisting her fingers. “Why did you draw it?”

Camellia shook her head and struggled to find a way to describe the mirror, without admitting she had a dangerous magical device. “I took some kind of drug.”

“Camellia…” Cernunnos’ grip on her hands momentarily hardened. “I don’t know what to say. That’s not like you.”

Camellia looked at Cernunnos. “But, it’s very like me.” She watched his eyes turn from horror to deep concern and suspicion. She regretted her statement. “I need to wash.”

“Yes, you do.” Cernunnos stood. He grabbed the door frame. “I’m very glad I caught up to you.” Then, he left.

 

Adalhard stood behind his desk, arms crossed. Camellia sat on the other side. She occupied one of two chairs. Cernunnos took the other. Behind them, Eva leaned against the wall. She cradled her crystal staff. On an antique bench, Meladee sat and fiddled with something Camellia couldn’t see. Camellia stared at her lap. The room was silent. When she raised her eyes, she met Adalhard’s.

“Let me see if I have everything straight. There’s a Lurrien monster, still alive, in the Suen temple. A group of mages guard it, and a group of – for lack of a better term - let’s call them cultists.” Adalhard put his fingers to his lips. He narrowed his eyes in thought. “A group of cultists want to free the monster and live in harmony, except its idea of harmony is a marriage between tentacle porn and carefree beachside holidays.” Adalhard pointed at Camellia. “It’s chosen you to be the high priestess. Cahir is already the high priest, and he’s chased you halfway across the known world.” Adalhard paced. “Now, you’ve visited this creature, and it gave you information to combat an older, bigger, and worse version on a previously unknown colony, established by the Lurriens. You think we should alert government authorities and try to kill both of them or at least extract a spaceship, of which several are just sitting idle at the colony.” Adalhard shook his head. “Camellia, if Cernunnos weren’t here…”

“But, I am, and I experienced something strange at that temple too, many years ago. We also have our proof.”

Adalhard nodded. “I’ve already got the authorities knocking down my door. The site around the temple is in awful shape. This temple is protected by law. No entry and no destructive study. The ground is full of holes. Hundreds of them. And, scorch marks and slush.” Adalhard pulled a file from his desk and threw it on the table.

Cernunnos opened it, and Camellia beheld the temple’s ruined surroundings.

Her mouth dropped open. She shook her head. “I did not…”

“I did,” Meladee announced from behind. “Those cultists showed up, and I had to defend us. Or, we’d be dead.” Meladee paused. “Or worse, she’d be high priestess. I’d be a disciple, and Eva would be dead.”

Camellia turned in her seat and looked at Meladee. She found Meladee grim but confident. Meladee glanced at Eva, and Eva shrugged. Camellia turned back to face Adalhard.

From behind, drifted Meladee’s next words, “Do they know who did it?”

“No. They’re making inquiries. They’re asking me because we sent a request to study the temple about five years ago.” Adalhard set his eyes on Cernunnos and Camellia in turn. “The request was denied.”

From the rear of the office, came Meladee’s voice again, “Are you going to turn us in?”

Camellia watched as Adalhard’s eyes traveled the room. First, he looked over her head, at Eva and Meladee. Camellia could not see how they met his gaze, and she didn’t dare turn in her seat yet again. So, she let their expressions remain a mystery, imagining a glare from Meladee and a stoney look from Eva.

Once Adalhard had studied her new friends, he set his eyes on Cernunnos. He glared at the older man. Finally, his eyes came to Camellia, and he took in her melancholy, with what she thought was a hint of anger and pity.

Finally, he spoke, “No. I won’t turn you in.” Adalhard sat and pulled another file from the corner of his desk. “What I am going to do is submit another request to study the temple. We’ll hire a security team of Groazan mages and fighters. Perhaps, a dhampir or vampire hunter. We’ll need to wait for Groazan and Tagtrumian approval, but given the attack, someone will want to know what’s special about the temple. We don’t want to jeopardize our non-aggression pact, but Ponk may back us if Tagtrum tries to deny the request.”

Again, Adalhard’s gaze roved around the room, and Camellia watched. She didn’t look at any of her companions but deduced their expressions from Adalhard’s. When he looked back at Eva and Meladee, he seemed calm and a bit self-congratulatory. Did Eva show gratitude? Meladee relief? Adalhard looked at Cernunnos, and his eyes narrowed. From Adalhard’s consternation, Camellia wondered if Cernunnos might be suspicious or unhappy. Again, Adalhard saved Camellia for last.

He always does that.

He regarded her with faraway eyes. Then, he looked nowhere. “Cernunnos, I’d like you to be present for the temple investigation.”

Camellia dropped her gaze, and in her peripheral vision, Cernunnos nodded.

Adalhard picked up Eva’s fuzzy pictures. His mouth turned down in disgust. “We’re going to leave these out of the official investigation, but I’ll keep them for the vampire hunter and security team. I’m having a hard time figuring out what this thing looks like, but it doesn’t look pretty.”

“It’s not,” Eva promised.

“For now, we wait for the commotion to dissipate while I prepare the request. They’ll likely want to repair the damage before we go in, but I’ll push for sooner. Camellia?”

Slowly, Camellia looked up.

Adalhard stared back. He seemed so stern. “You are not to have anything to do with this investigation. I strongly suggest you take more leave. I don’t think you should go home, so we’ll find somewhere else.”

Camellia nodded. Cernunnos touched her arm and tried to catch her eyes, but Camellia allowed the touch only.

Adalhard waved a dismissal. “Go get some rest. And, stay in the building.” Then, from his drawer, he produced a piece of official stationary. “Cernunnos, I could use your assistance.”

“Of course.”

Camellia rose, and Cernunnos tried to hug her. He grabbed her arm and gave a tug, but she pulled free. She hurried out of the room on her friends’ heels. She closed the office door behind her.

With hope, Eva greeted Camellia. “It’s not perfect, but it’s a start. Certainly faster than things moved in Lurren.”

Meladee crossed her arms. “Yeah, so what do we do while they argue over whether the gardener gets to fix things first?” She meandered toward the exit – the forbidden exit.

Camellia walked slow, keeping her eyes trained on the floor. I really don’t think he’s all that interested…always so professional.

“Hey?” Meladee swatted Camellia’s arm. “You okay? Little flesh ball still got you down?”

“No, it’s not that.” Camellia put a hand to her head. “Well, maybe it is.” She pulled her concerns back to Ah’nee’thit. “Cahir will still want to capture me. He can follow me anywhere. They probably can’t detain him or lock him in tavern closets forever.”

“Yeah, but Adalhard wants you to stay here, so I guess they’ve got plans to deal with Cahir.” Meladee shrugged. “We could make our own plans. Set off southward. Super far south to unmapped lands.” Meladee swept a hand through the air. “That would be an adventure. We’d probably die off the coast of Ponk thinking we’d found some new place.”

Eva stopped and faced both her companions. She raised an eyebrow. “What’s the one place Cahir will not follow you?”

Camellia perked at Eva’s question. “My father’s house?” she joked. “No, Ah’nee’thit is more than a match for a vampire. In fact, they might get on.”

Camellia dropped the joke and thought harder. Cahir could go anywhere he pleased. He might not follow her south, but he would follow her to Ponk, despite its political issues. He would follow her all over Tagtrum, and certainly Groaza.

Her eyes grew wide. “Lurren. Ah’nee’thit is afraid of the big one. I doubt it would send its high priest there. After all, it didn’t want me to go.” Camellia paced down the hall, not sure where she headed. “Ah’nee’thit also said the big creature would ignore us as long as we didn’t announce our presence or a make a spectacle of ourselves. Ah’nee’thit thought we could get a ship.” Camellia put a finger to her lips. “We have nowhere else to be, and it may be months or even a year before anyone sends an army.”

“We should do what the little creature suggests and go ourselves.” Eva smiled. “We should test those weapons. It’s a long time before any of your people will do something with them.”

Camellia glanced between Eva and Meladee. “I know it’s a low priority, but we could use a ship to check outside the wormhole. Maybe, someone out there can help us.”

“When the wormhole shifts,” Eva said. “But, that should be soon.”

Meladee frowned. “This trip was supposed to be for research. How do you classify a trip to hell as research?”

“It’s very informative.” Camellia nodded. “Hardcore archaeology. The kind fit for an adventure hero.”

“I can’t believe you… You really think we can get a ship?” Meladee spread her hands wide and looked at Camellia with disbelief.

Eva nodded. “I got one. With these weapons and your help, I think we can get a bigger one. The more I see of you, the more I think it’s possible.”

Meladee took a moment of silence. Camellia watched the indecision fade from her face to be replaced by something like longing.

Meladee said, “One problem. You guys will probably be fine there, but what about me? It’ll break my mind.”

Eva knit her brow. “That is a problem. We need your magic.”

Camellia’s mind raced. She thought aloud. “The mages that guard Ah’nee’thit also study it. They must have a spell to withstand its telepathic attacks. When Cernunnos met them, they weren’t struggling, like he was. And, we saw a spell around the rim of the chasm, designed to keep Ah’nee’thit inside.” Camellia waited for objections, but there were none. “Maybe we can get that spell - the one for telepathy protection. Though, only the mages would know it.”

“Wonderful.” Meladee sighed. She rubbed the back of her neck and searched the hallway as if looking for an alternative. “Let’s piss ‘em off some more and get that spell. Meanwhile, we should work on our freeze ray and spell. Where are we going to do that?”

 

Before they sailed away, the three women ate a small meal in the AAH cafeteria and waited for Adalhard’s call. He promised Camellia a place to hide from Cahir, but of course, Camellia had no intention of taking his offer, unless that place was Adalhard’s home. Then, Camellia might be tempted. She didn’t tell Meladee or Eva. The only one who needed to know about Camellia’s passion for Adalhard was Camellia herself. After dark, they would sneak away, and Camellia would be troubled no more by the call of Adalhard. She knew he wouldn’t like it, but she had a better idea where to stay.

“Don’t you have someplace less terrifying?” Meladee pestered.

“No, I’m only welcome terrifying places.” Camellia pushed her chair back and rose. “Now, I’m going upstairs to check my old room. I want to make sure I’m not leaving anything useful behind.”

“Like old, painful memories?” Meladee put a hand to her heart and gave an exaggerated sigh.

Camellia shook her head and suppressed a laugh. She left the table. As she walked away, she heard Meladee and Eva continue the conversation.

Eva’s voice drifted. “Ah, old, painful memories. The most powerful propulsion.”

Camellia smiled and trotted towards the stairs. She approached Adalhard’s office and slowed. She noted the darkened room and open door.

They finished quickly. Must be off doing important…

“Camellia!” Adalhard called quietly but harshly from his office door. He stood in the dark and beckoned her inside.

Oh dear. A trap. Slowly, she entered his office, but she remained in the doorway.

“You lied to me. You didn’t take leave. You didn’t even want leave.” Adalhard’s features lay in shadow, but to Camellia’s eyes, his anger stood in stark detail. “You left Groaza and investigated an artifact without organizing a team. You didn’t get the proper permits or contact the proper authorities.” One by one, Adalhard ticked off her mistakes on his fingers. “You can’t just go anywhere in a professional capacity, even if the area is deserted of inhabitants. This is probably the sloppiest work you’ve done.”

Camellia winced. He was right about that.

“What’s more. Old Eudor is dangerous territory. I don’t care how experienced an ice shipper your pilot is. You don’t go to frozen locations with a team of two people.”

In my original plan, it was just going to be me – with almost no food. Camellia’s head filled with laughter, a product of her own unhinged amusement.

“Why didn’t you tell me about your suspicions? Why did you keep your realization about the Lurrien artifact to yourself? I was right there,” Adalhard hissed. He stepped closer. “You could have told me, but you walked out that door.”

“Telling you would have been a mistake.” Camellia felt cold. A part of her screamed not to say anything more, but she buried that part away.

“Oh, really?” Adalhard glared.

“Yes, because if I’d told you, then you wouldn’t have believed me. Or, you would have taken a month to set up a dig, and Cahir would have picked me off. I wouldn’t have suspected a thing,” Camellia said. “I’d be the high priestess of some toddler monster, and…”

“I would have organized a dig faster than a month.” Adalhard paced back into the shadows. “And, Cahir wouldn’t have been able to pick you off.”

Camellia nearly laughed. “Just admit that I predicted your actions perfectly.”

“No!” Adalhard beckoned her inside.

Camellia stayed put, feeling their conversation was private enough.

Adalhard stalked close. “I am not going to let you tell me what my actions would have been. For some reason, you think I would have treated you like a crazy person.”

Camellia laughed, short and quiet. “Yes! Because you think I’m crazy. All of you.” The smile fell from Camellia’s face. She advanced into Adalhard’s space and whispered, “Cahir, the secretive and supposedly dishonest cultist, told me the entire AAH gossiped about me while I was gone. And, I believe him.” Camellia stared at Adalhard, but she didn’t register his expression. Instead, she focused inward, viewing the conversation through a haze. “We are supposed to be a professional organization, and sometimes, the lot of you act anything but.” Again, Camellia advanced.

Adalhard retreated. He raised his hands to calm her. He might as well have said the words – calm down. It had the same effect – useless.

“And, the moment you all found out about my little problems, there was suddenly talk of my needing an evaluation.” Camellia imitated a man’s voice, “Oh, she’s unbalanced. She’s not fit for work. Here, let me bring her my little card, with my two-cents and my superior therapist that’s going to cure her and make everything better.” Camellia pulled the therapist’s card from her bodice and flicked it at Adalhard. It fluttered to the ground. “Now, thanks to everything that’s happened, no one is ever going to take me seriously again.”

Camellia whirled, ready to leave.

Adalhard grabbed her arm. “You want me to take you seriously? Don’t run off, and don’t be such a hypocrite. Act professionally, and I will take you seriously.”

Camellia gaped and pulled her arm free. I’m done with him, a part of her insisted. Oh, no you’re not, another internal voice countered. Camellia listened to the latter. “Do you know what’s unprofessional?”

Adalhard waited.

“Using my private drawing that was in my room, bothering no one, as evidence of an unhinged mind and grounds for suspension. You even admitted that my work quality never slipped. I want to know who went in there,” Camellia demanded. “Who do I have to thank for my life right now?”

Adalhard took a deep breath. “Me.”

Camellia stared.

Adalhard frowned. “I went in your room to leave you flowers. I wanted you to see them upon your return.”

“Why?” Camellia’s anger fell away, like wind, lost from a ship’s sails.

“I strongly suspected your mother would die. I wanted you to feel welcome here because I know grief can make familiar places painful and strange.”

Camellia touched her temples. “I never thought it would be you.” The most disinterested man, or maybe not...but he still looked at my things, without my permission. “Well, I suppose I can thank you that I’m not Cahir’s new, tentacled wife.” Camellia met his eyes. “Adalhard, I don’t know what to say to you. You want me to talk to you about my discoveries? Why should I do that when it’s beneath you? You took one look at my walls and called a committee.”

“These situations are different.” Adalhard raised his hands.

Camellia shook her head.

“I wanted to help you. This time, I’m going to do just that. We need to discuss a safe place for you. And, I’ll need you to comply. Don’t leave Groaza.” Adalhard leaned close.

“Just make the decision for me. I’m sure whatever you pick, will be fine,” Camellia said.

“I’m not going to do that. I’ll find some places. You can choose among them.”

“Fine, Adalhard.” Camellia turned to leave.

“Camellia,” Adalhard called.

She stopped but didn’t look back.

“Cernunnos and I are very worried about you.”

“I’m fine.” Worry about your future wife. Give her flowers. Camellia kept the retort to herself. God, even now I’m worried that such a woman exists. “You probably have plenty to worry about besides me. Why don’t you save yourself some time?”

“You and I both know that you can’t choose what you worry about. And, this...the way you’re acting right now is exactly why we’re worried,” Adalhard said.

Some part of Camellia declared him right – at least about her behavior; she still disagreed about his secrecy regarding her wall art. But, when they called you back to talk about that drawing, you certainly played the part of the unhinged lunatic.

With a shake of her head, she dismissed his statement and walked to the door. He grabbed her wrist, and she caught her breath, captured again.

“I have a little more work to do here. Go the lounge with your friends, and I’ll meet you there in two hours.”

I don’t want to lie to him. So, Camellia said nothing. She didn’t even nod but left his office and headed for the cafeteria, abandoning her last look at her old room.

Camellia wondered at Adalhard’s interest. Within her, two parts bickered: one believed he cared for her, the other argued that she misinterpreted it all. Her new knowledge of the flowers lent more power to the first. I should go back. I’m petty. I’m childish. All I have to do is say something and wait for his answer. But, Camellia dreaded his potential answer. He might say that he only felt friendship. He might say that he cared, but he couldn’t entangle himself with her under her current condition, thus why he tried to fix her first. He might say he loved her enough to try. But, he had been the one to visit her room. He had seen her drawing, decided he knew best, and called an emergency discussion about her state of mind with other senior members of the AAH. Maybe, he didn’t expect them to suspend her. Camellia could barely remember his role in her hearing.

After all this, I still feel for the man. Is he right about me? Or am I? Camellia clutched her head. It was too complicated and a moot point.

I have to do this. I have to go to Lurren. I promised Eva and Meladee. I’ve screwed everything up, except my time with them. We’re going to get a ship, and I’m not waiting anymore.

Camellia entered the cafeteria and walked to the table. “We need to leave within two hours,” she whispered.

Meladee and Eva looked up.

“They’re readying my straight jacket.”

Meladee’s eyes widened. “Well, fuck. We should fly towards Tagtrum for a while to fool them.”

“A good plan,” Eva agreed.

Camellia bowed her head and didn’t even stop her fantasies of Adalhard. They weren’t thoughts of happily ever after. Instead, they matched reality – the things he would say if he knew what she planned and strained meetings after her time away. Maybe, if she could get that ship, those meetings would see her triumphant.