Pan entered the Arcane’s Complex and tried to let the door close behind her. To her dismay, Detective Casimir held it open and followed her in. Pan kept her back to the detective, so he wouldn’t see her exasperation.

“Don’t worry. We’ll be able to narrow the suspects down once your friend Aria returns in two days. At the very least, we’ll finally rule you out.”

The door shut behind Casimir. He didn’t even seem to notice his surroundings or that he’d walked into the Arcane’s Complex uninvited. He just stayed focused on Pan.

Pan turned and faced him. Midday sun filtered through the windows, and Pan waited for Detective Casimir to say, See you after lunch. He didn’t.

“We won’t be able to question anyone else, until later tonight. I guess…” Casimir rubbed the back of his neck.

Did it cause him pain to allow her some free time?

“I’ll see you at 20:00.” Pan glanced at the exit.

Casimir said, “We could work on the idea that there are dead reapers somewhere. They’d be children I guess – when they died. I think we could find spirits like that at the hospital.” Casimir gazed at Pan.

Now, he wanted to investigate the reapers’ murderer?

“I thought we were focused on finding the reaper. Not a killer of reapers,” Pan said.

“It’s connected. All the messages suggest a kind of anger at this murderer. The reaper wants to out that person.” Casimir seemed to stare into Pan’s soul.

Pan spread her hands. “Then, why not just write the murderer’s name on the wall?”

“The reaper doesn’t know it. The reaper is baiting the murderer.” Casimir remained intense.

She met his eyes and started to sweat.

“Now, we just have to figure out what our reaper does know. How he or she discovered that there are dead reapers.” Casimir stroked his chin.

Pan would love for him to solve the murders, but in so doing, he would discover her secret.

Pan rubbed her forehead. “I need a nap.”

Casimir clapped her on the shoulder. “Alright, you sleep. I’ll see you tonight. And, gather your courage because tomorrow we’re going to attack this investigation from a different angle. We’re going to find out who murdered reapers and who might be angry about that.” Casimir lightened his touch and gave her a gentle nudge to the stairs.

He finally left the Complex, leaving Pan so entangled in her web of secrecy that she wanted to pop back in time and save herself this trouble.

 Fun. Interesting. What was I thinking?

Pan didn’t ascend the stairs. She put a hand to her head and walked through the deserted Arcane’s Complex. Curfew kept everyone in at night, so everyone spent their days out. Pan had the place to herself.

With a sigh, she walked to the back wall, near the mentors’ rooms and lounge. Four long window seats offered perches to gaze into the backyard.

Pan couldn’t sleep. She couldn’t draw. She couldn’t dream of Sotir. She could do nothing but stew and try to find her way to freedom. She plopped down on the seat and knelt before the window, ready to watch the empty garden beyond. She couldn’t do even that. Pan put her head in her hands.

“Pan.”

At the sound of her name, Pan turned.

Brynn leaned on her staff. “Why aren’t you out?”

“I’m out all the time now, and you know curfew has no power over me.”

“Feeling stressed? Overworked? Regretful?” Brynn smiled a little.

Pan narrowed her eyes.

“I’m really not surprised. After what you’ve done.” Brynn’s smile turned into a scowl. “What were you even doing on that ward?”

Slowly, Pan stood up. Her confusion gave way. “Are you the one?”

Again, Brynn smiled. “I’m the one. Been looking for me?” Brynn leaned her staff against the wall and stood on her own. She spread her arms wide. “Here I am.”

Pan looked at the staff. Brynn needed that, didn’t she?

“Let’s come to an understanding,” Brynn said.

Pan pointed at the staff. “How are you doing that?”

Brynn raised her eyebrows. “How do you think? Why do you think I did it?” Brynn didn’t refer to the simple act of leaving her staff.

Pan nearly whispered the words, “You’re a reaper too.”

“That’s right. Say it quietly. We don’t need anyone else to know.” Brynn put a finger to her lips. “I thought you were smart enough to keep quiet. But, the best you could manage was twelve years. I knew the minute you became a ghost seer that I should have done something about your continued survival, but here we are.”

Pan struggled to draw breath. She opened her mouth to speak. It took a long moment before Pan found the words. “If you knew about me that long, why did you let me live?”

Brynn looked left then right. “I’ll tell you the little story. You know what I am. When I was a student, the reaper incidents were fresh enough. They taught us about them. I learned from a young age what a reaper was, what it meant to be one. The day I became an arcane, I couldn’t help it. I found another as quickly as I could, and I took her power: telekinesis. She wouldn’t have lived, so why not?”

Pan stared at Brynn and gestured to the staff.

“Yes, I’ve taken more than one power over the years but only from the ward and only from those who would have died anyway. With medical advancements, it’s gotten harder, but I managed. To get on with my story – they stopped teaching you about the massacres. The other young reapers...they didn’t know.”

“I learned,” Pan objected.

“You didn’t really learn. You didn’t know that the reapers acted for years before they got caught. Quiet murders. One too many claims that a fellow arcane couldn’t be helped. Then, the chase…and the devastation. You never learned to internalize the shame. I know. I’ve watched you. I watched the others. All of you – proud little reapers. Secretive – yes, but still far too happy with yourselves.” Brynn advanced a few steps.

Pan didn’t back away.

“They had no concept of the evil they could do. So, I made sure they couldn’t do it. It was easy. I just had to find my long-lost family members and, in most cases, they remained in the family, easy to find.” Brynn pointed at Pan. “Except for you. Your great grandmother did a good job of leaving the reaper family. By the time I looked up your background, you’d already become a ghost seer. Too rare and too hearty to just kill. It would have looked suspicious.”

Pan had a million thoughts to think and one emotion to feel, but she held off. First, she wanted to hear what else Brynn might say. 

Brynn sighed. “You know. I really worried about you. I did everything I could to get you in my team, so I could watch you. Still, I felt I was letting you run wild.” Brynn gestured to Pan. “You only have…what? Three powers?” Brynn shook her head. “You can see spirits. You have telekinesis, though you wisely hide it – you took that from Nella, right?” Brynn said the next part very softly. “You can reap. Except, you don’t. All this time, you could have visited the ward and gotten stronger, but you didn’t. You didn’t use your ghost sight to do anything more than what we asked of you.” Brynn chuckled. “You’re a better person than I, or I strongly suspect, more squeamish. Why did you have to go and ruin a good thing?”

Pan’s breath quickened, and her heart beat fast. She felt her face grow warm. None of it from fear. “What’s the point in collecting powers if I can do nothing with them?”

“The point…” Brynn shrugged. “I don’t know. For me, it’s more of a compulsion. For you, less so. I’m starting to wonder if I could have left the others alone – well not all of them. But, what’s done is done.”

“I want you to tell what you’ve done. I want you to admit it. And admit that you’re the reaper.” Pan trembled. She searched the hall for others but saw no one.

Brynn shook her head. “We both know that’s not going to happen. Now, I’m safe as long as you stay quiet. No one is going to suspect me. I took care of my situation all these years. No matter what happens, you are not safe. You’re in the group of favored suspects.” Brynn picked up her staff. “I have a deal for you. We work together. You do nothing more about this situation, and I’ll help you pass their little tests.”

Pan put a hand to her head. She felt dizzy. “That won’t work. The detective is looking for the reaper’s murderer. He’s taking me back to the hospital tomorrow, and I think he suspects me. He…he knows.”

Brynn frowned. She rubbed her temple and sighed. “Pan. Pan, what am I going to do with you? Well, that’s a problem. We’re done. We’re finished.”

“We’re?” Pan had killed no one. She was just a reaper…but one with two powers she shouldn’t have.

“Yes, we. Here’s the plan. I’m going to get us a ship. You stay here. I’ll return and rescue you in three days.” Brynn held up three fingers.

Pan stepped forward. “Aria will be back by then. Sotir too. Tomorrow, I have to go to the hospital with Detective Casimir. I can’t just wait around here while you escape.”

“You can. And you will. I’m not escaping. Not without you. I’m getting the ship.”

“Just a few years ago, you would have killed me. How am I supposed to trust you?” Pan invaded Brynn’s personal space.

Brynn reached over and fixed some of Pan’s hair. “My young friend. My fellow reaper. Take my advice and do nothing. Let me handle your mess. I will be back because I don’t want to venture into the galaxy alone. I’m taking you for company, as a kind of apprentice.”

Pan pulled her hair free.

Brynn exhaled slow. “If you want, go hide in the country. I’ll find you either way. No matter what you do, I don’t want to hear about any more of these stunts. Just stay quiet like you have all this time.” Brynn turned to go.

“So that’s why,” Pan called.

Brynn stopped.

“That’s why you were so upset to hear Chara was my favorite mentor. You think it should be you.”

Brynn scoffed, “Hardly.” She walked swift to the front of the Complex and left.

Pan continued to shake. She raised her hands and looked at their soft shade of grey.

Pan wouldn’t stay for Casimir to snap his trap, but she wasn’t going to tromp around the galaxy with a murderer either.

Pan stalked upstairs to her room. She got inside and closed the door. She dug her hands into her hair and pressed her nails into her scalp. Her plan worked, but still, the murderer – the real reaper – was countless steps ahead of her. And, Byrnn had always been.

Pan thought back to her early teenage years and remembered her desire to capture Brynn’s approval. She always felt the woman never liked her, and she was right. The woman wanted to kill her!

Pan laughed. How could she have been so stupid?

The laughter died. Pan remembered the first time she met Brynn. She’d stood in her hospital room, feeling better but naked in her little white gown. Doctors towered over her, and Chara welcomed Pan to the Arcanes. Twelve-year old Pan had been so confused, but she liked Chara. She showed her admiration, asking repeatedly if she would see Chara at the Complex. While Chara laughed and gave Pan assurances that they would indeed see each other again, Brynn entered the room. She stood in the background, leaning on her staff – oh correction, pretending to lean on her staff. Brynn watched Pan and waited until everyone else filed out of the room. Immediately, Brynn questioned Pan on her ghost sight. Pan never knew what danger she’d been in. Brynn could have killed her there and then if she didn’t value secrecy so much.

Brynn, you’ve always been there. Always watching. Always judging. And, you had no right. No damn right. 

Pan stood still and silent. She still trembled. She thought of Brynn’s change of heart. Somewhere along the way, Brynn decided she liked Pan – enough to be jealous of Chara and enough to take Pan as an apprentice in the wider galaxy on their own.

Too little. Too damn late.

Pan picked up the nearest object. It might have been her brush. She didn’t know because it left her hand soon after.

Pan chucked it at her mirror. The glass shattered, probably loud enough to hear through the door, but Pan didn’t care. No one was here.

She snatched up a drawing of her current home: the Arcane’s Complex – half finished. She’d only just begun to darken the lines. Pan tore it in half and then tore those pieces in half again.

With long strides, Pan crossed the room, snatched her portfolio, and threw it open. She looked for any drawings that paid tribute to her life as it had been. She found one of Brynn and ripped it into tiny shreds. The pieces got too small, and Pan tore at her own fingers. She cast the pieces towards the floor.

She paged through more drawings and found more of her home, a map of powers, and portraits of her mentors. Pan tore them all. Everything that reminded her of being arcane. She paused before Chara’s portrait but ripped it to shreds, just the same.

With a start, Pan remembered that she kept scans of all her drawings and would need to delete the scans to truly destroy them. She rushed to her computer and woke it up. Her messages sat open, and she saw two from Aria and one from Sotir.

Pan slowed. She noticed the heat in her face and the strong pulse of her heart.

Aria’s first message read: Be careful. Sotir thinks the reaper wants you. I don’t want anything to happen, but if it does, I love you. You’re my best friend.

Pan stared at the message and breathed hard. She didn’t type an answer.

Aria’s second message read: I heard about the mine. Are you alright? I heard you didn’t get the body, but everyone is alive. Did anyone act suspiciously?

Yes, me. Pan bowed her head. “I’m the reaper, Aria. Why can’t you see that?”

Pan raised her eyes and looked at the last message.

Sotir wrote: I’m too far away to help, but the more I think about it, the more I wonder if I’ve read this one wrong. In case I have, you should be even more careful. If you are the target of the reaper, I’m sure you will manage to evade death. If not, your future will be more uncertain. When I return, will you let me read you? No matter what I see, I’ll love you still.

Pan froze. She would not let Sotir read her. It sounded like he didn’t need to. He knew, or he suspected.

I need to get out of here.

She closed her computer and made it sleep. Pan snatched up a bag and packed it. She took her computer, a bit of money, and a change of clothes. Then, Pan held her drawing of the reapers. She looked at their five faces, all in a row, and thought how two faces were missing. Pan grabbed her pencils and an eraser. She would finish this piece, and then, she would share it. First, she stowed it in her bag, cringing as she creased it.

A few quick steps brought Pan to her door. She put her hand on the knob and turned back to view her room. It was covered in shreds of paper and shards of glass. A fine work of art in its own right, a beautiful display of anger.

With Pan’s resolve set, she could only think of one thing. Brynn knew Pan was a reaper and thought Pan was bad at it. Brynn wanted Pan to keep being bad at it. She wanted Pan to do nothing.

No, Brynn. I don’t think I will do nothing.