"What's this? Haruhi-chan, are you seeing what I'm seeing?!"

Previously, sensing a faint magical presence in the side of the mountain, I was digging away at the stone. A few dozen meters in, I found something that looked interesting. After another few minutes of excavation, I found a random halberd. It was too large for human use and was covered by a purplish mist. Aside for three small dull stones--one at its grip and two at its head--it was unadorned, without anything in its looks to recommend it. But from the way the stones were inset and sealed, I could tell that it was an ancient relic fashioned with techniques long lost.

My curiosity instantly faded.

I looked over to cute Haruhi-chan and made a disgusted face, sticking out my tongue and going "blaaghh". Haruhi-chan nodded, the cute shin-length maid dress bobbing up and down.

We were about to leave it and continue our journey, when I remembered a story that I once heard back in my adventuring days.

My adventuring days! Back then, I was interested in learning everything about the world. For some reason, I found magic "strange" and "unreasonable". I read many books that traced the origin of magic variously to the Gods, or to Spirits, or to the natural elements, or just to existence itself. I was interested! Who knows why?

One day, when I was talking to the Director of the Magical Academy (he was amazed at a new spell I invented on the fly to win a School magic tournament), he told me a story about Shibolet, or the "Goat God". Why did he tell me this story? When the being in question, generally held to be a disreputable God, said to have ties to the Demon Kingdom, had been relegated to the lowest place in our Pantheon? Perhaps I had asked him about Dark magic.

Anyways, He, being the youngest of the Gods, had ascended to Godhood during a time still in recorded history. Though the records are now piecemeal and unreliable, some faint trace of evidence still links us to the moment of his transcendence.

I don't remember the details. But there was distinctly the description of a strange weapon, between a trident and a scythe, that was bladed on both ends and had no proper handle.

"Haruhiii-chaaaan, Haruhiii-chaaan! Can it be? Can it really be?"

I make a shocked expression to Haruhi-chan and get down on all fours to examine the weapon.

Sure enough, it does not have a real handle. There is a region of wooden shaft between the two blades where you can hold it, but when I grip it at that spot, the weapon feels clearly imbalanced and unwieldy. The difference between holding it in the middle of the shaft and holding it by either end of the blade is like night and day. Clearly, just like in the story, it is intended to be held by the blade.

It has a distinctive look. The blade does not shine. On first impression, the blade would seem dull and dusty. But the edge is sharp. The metal, or the treatment of the metal, is naturally sepia-colored.

There is no doubt about its age. Of course, I have long dismissed the story as another legend. But now, if this lying before me really is the weapon itself... I feel a renewed sense of purpose flood through me. Whether it's true or not does not matter, I'll at least have something to investigate. Let's not overthink things. No, let's think positive. All signs point to it being the weapon.

The magic energy that wreaths it already indicate that it's among the strongest relics in existence. Of course, being already the most powerful despot in the human world, I have no need for another one to drag along.

"No Haruhii-chan. Now is not the time."

Because I had gotten on all fours, my stupid maid had gotten behind me, used to that being the signal.

"No Haruhi-chan..."

Taking a deep draught of the mountain air, I set my face rigid and lift my chin slightly upward. I feel the sun shining brilliantly on my form. I look magnificent, a real hero. I feel Haruhi-chan's admiring gaze, impressed at my resolution.

I grip the scythe-trident tightly, feeling the edge dig into my hand, and lift it in the air.

With my other hand, I burst forth with magical energy, a combination of all the Spirit Elements at once. Only a select few of the human world are able even to use two elements at once. And they did not use a single hand to accomplish this.

Out of my palm it spurts forth -- fire, water, and ice attacks, destroying each other as they surge outward. Lightning flashes through the random paths of water and ice and is smothered by earth magic. Earth is carried out by wind, exploding outward in "putt putt putt" noises. In total, a torrent of magic, beginning with brilliant vermillions, rubies, sapphires of warring elements, and ending in a giant jet of wet and charred dirt.

Carrying the cowering Haruhi-chan in one arm, and gripping the sharp blade of the relic in the other, I sprint to the top of the mountain and spend the rest of the week in meditation.

 

 

Since the day I found the weapon of the god I had come across nothing else, despite having scoured the entire mountain, and bored hundreds of holes throughout its sides with my bare fists. I suppose it can't be helped. For weeks, perhaps months, I had made this mountain my home. Now I'll have to journey forth for more clues if I'm to make any progress in my search.

It would help if I could remember the rest of the story the director of the Academy told me that day. I keep racking my brain, but all I can come up with is the distinctive description of the weapon.

I don't know where I am. I have forgotten maps. I hope to forget, by and by, the names of towns, Cities, countries, the names of rivers, the names of mountains.

For a long time, I had extinguished, by long meditation, every civilized thought in my mind. I had suppressed every correspondence of a thing with its name, sign, or place in relation to things. It takes me a moment to call to mind the sense that I was once, indeed, the Leader of a country, that I lived in splendor, and in the density of the society of the court.

Since I left civilization, I have held it as a point of honor to block out the meanings assigned to things by the civilized world. Yes! I have made myself barbaric.

A tale I had forgotten... The key must be the find the person who'd told me it. The Director of the Academy. Or someone else who happens to know it...

So I journey forth with my Haruhi-chan. Sometimes I carry my maid on my back. Sometimes, Haruhi-chan leads the way, like a daughter leading her old decrepit father through the neighborhood walks...

Because the weapon hurts to wield, because I have lost my taste for proving myself, for enduring pain, I am using a wagon to carry it in. The hand I used to hold it is covered in wounds that have still not healed. I can scarcely be hurt even by a dragon. One could say, "As expected of a Legendary relic."

. . .

We have been travelling across barren crags, treacherous passes, and across crevasses shaped like colossal flowers.

When we reach the highest mountain in the range, we discover ourselves suddenly surrounded by fertile valleys. White birds hover above the treetops. Smoke from fires rise into the sky. Grand beams of light drift over the grassland and the patches of forest, as clouds move across the sun. And eagles, circling high above, dive now and then, falling like spears at something on the crags.

I stand about for a moment, absorbing the scene below me.

"Haruhi-chan. You and I have long ceased to be swayed by the influence of that old Illusionist, 'Beauty'. And yet, how tears rise to my eyes now. What could all of this be, but a sign...a sign for our eyes alone...? my eyes alone...? a sign of my destiny?"

As I say this, I hear sounds in the distance... The language of dwarves...

"There must be a Kingdom of dwarves nearby or something, huh Haruhi-chan?"

Of course, Haruhi-chan can hear nothing, being without the Enhanced Hearing skill. So be it.

 

* * * * *

 

Two colossi of stone stand on either side of the gate. Two dwarven heroes.

A line of caravans and travellers. A handful of stalls. A pair of smallfolk selling buttered corncobs to the people in the line. A pair of beastkin, girded with armor of black leather, patrolling the line to enter.

I feel a sense of resignation. Back to civilization! Still, this is better than going to a human land. Here, there is still a sense of freedom... Wherever races and cultures mingle there is space for interpretation, for ambiguity...there's room to breathe. Not like the Capital!

 

I heave a sigh, and shake my head smilingly.

"I guess we better line up, huh, Haruhi-chan?"

Of course, once they recognize me there'll be a big commotion and fuss. But for now it's better to pretend to be humble, down to earth. When later the story gets out, it'll endear everyone to me to know how, without hesitating, I waited in line just like the common people. It will please the average listener to hear how behind my intimidating front I'm just a regular person like everyone else.

"Come on, Haruhi-chan!" (I cry)

As we get to the back of the line I see one of the guards do a double take. He looks from me to Haruhi-chan then to the wagon with the weapon. Then, doing another double take, he looks back at cute Haruhi-chan. And then, doing another double take, back to the handle-less trident-scythe.

Ah, this reminds me of my Adventuring days.

The world has become fresh to me again. A new beginning. Perhaps a new continent? Perhaps a new world? Where this path to Godhood will take me I can't say.

My Lv 10 Court Skills combined with my Lv 20 Enhanced Presence Detection allows me to see the shifts in the crowd. Though even without them, I can plainly see travelers to the side of the line whispering to each other.

"Hey, you!" (a male voice)

"Oh, here we go, huh Haruhi-chan" (I murmur)

A brawny dog-type beastman approaches me. His fur is unattractive. His leather guards are ill-fitted to his body. He looks more similar to a hyena than a dog. It is obvious to anyone looking in that he is a simple mercenary hired by the notoriously homebody dwarves to take care of the area outside their caves.

Amazing. Is it possible he does not recognize me? Me, the S-rank Adventurer, the founder of a Kingdom, the bringer of peace and slayer of the Demon King? How far have I traveled? How many years have passed? What country am I in?

"Alright. Let's see your papers." (Beastman)

Naturally, no one else has been asked for their papers yet. I make no comment about this. Why should I? No matter, I've been prepared for this.

Of course, I no longer have my papers. Most of the contents of my dimensional storage I have left in the Palace, thrown out on my journey, or burned to cinders. I have not thrown out my gold, however. There is just something enchanting about money, something still, poetic, unjudgeable. Money -- money in the form of precious metals is still innocent. Somehow, it does not feel tainted by civilization, by common opinion, by the unwashed masses, or by what remains of my memory... Absolute, serene, indifferent to the world, and often, when I feel depressed, apathetic, or stressed by my duties as head of state, I would go to my secret chambers, and there, I would take out, all at once, the stores of wealth hidden in my storage. Like an ancient dragon, I would watch the silent serene glittering of my treasures.

Unfortunately, as I rummage around my dimensional storage with one hand, I trip over something at my feet and stagger forward. (As an aside, I've been noticing myself tripping more and more often lately. It likely has something to do with the fact that I've stopped eating for months on end, preferring to feed on the reserves of my own mana power.)

I look down. The thing that had tripped me is no longer there.

The beastman begins smirking at me.

An ugly fool. He's lucky that I'm not the tyrant I used to be, who still possessed enough male pride--who was still human enough, to save face at any price, and would kill at the wingbeat of an unfinished thought... But I am not afraid. I see myself feeling angry, but I do not move, except to look over at Haruhi-chan, who scratches their cute head and looks around at the crowd.

Best to stay humble. Yes. When was the last time I waited in line to enter a City? Let's enjoy the novelty.

 

Finally, I manage to retrieve a few lumps of gold. Lumps, oddly enough, not coins. I don't know how. Nothing in my Dimensional Storage should be able to be affected by anything in the external world. Most likely, in one of my deliriums, I decided to melt my gold coins for some reason that I can no longer remember...

Who knows. It's still gold.

I take out two hand sized logs, each worth in themselves a few of these idling caravans, and present them to the guard. In order to make manifest my intentions and "take on the responsibility" of the situation for both of us, I announce loudly that I am presenting him a bribe.

The beastman's eyes light up as expected. Despite their suspicious shape it is clear that he feels strongly inclined to simply take it.

Everyone around us is paying attention now. Since I am not officially supposed to be searched until I reach the gate, this is, strictly speaking, not really a bribe either.

"Hey, are you kidding me?" (Beastman)

Some of the beastmen on the sidelines begin to laugh. The travelers in line ahead of us try to see what the commotion is about.

The gold in my hands begins to melt and drip into the ground. I drop to my knees and search the ground. Ground. Gone. Gone. Where did it go? But my fingers come up with nothing but firm mud.

"Whaaaat iis happening to meeeee??" (I hear myself screaming)

I see Haruhi-chan being assaulted by the Beastman. He is pulling on Haruhi-chan's dress, trying to drag Haruhi-chan into the woods, where no doubt he will have his way with them. Haruhi-chan's slender green shoulder is exposed... Oh! Shall my own house be attacked and dragged in the dirt by a mere brute, a mere brute? a mere brute?

Legendary weapon! You will taste the salt of infidel blood. Heavy! And as I pause a second to regain my balance, I begin shouting again in sheer frustration.

The Beastman darts a glance at me. Then, shaking his head as though this were all routine, he draws his sword. A few dozen yards away, the guards at the gate are approaching as well.

"This is your last chance. Do you understand? Well? Do you value your life?" (Beastman)

Funny, those should be my words! Hah! -- I swing the blade of the scythe.