So, golems. Freaky.

What stood before me were 2 incredibly tall, hulking masses of pure stone, coalesced into a semi humanoid form. Their 'legs' and 'arms' were about as big as I was. Probably bigger. Actually, no, far bigger. 

I looked up at one of them. It had little 'eyes' made out of coal and a crack that looked almost like a smile. Dawwwww, that's adorable. 

I looked down at the floor. I noticed dents in the clean stone ground. The dents were about the size of their feet. Aaaaaahhh, that's terrifying.

One of the creatures looked down at us. It's head titled for a moment, it seemed confused. Dawwwww, that's adorable.

Then it stepped forward, it's coal eyes began to glow red (might not be coal, thinking about it), and as it's foot slowly hit the ground the ground shook and a terrible thud echoed throughout. Aaaaaahhh, that's TERRIFYING HOLY-

"Right, this should be fun." S said.

"Can you take one by yourself?" Michaus asked.

"I could take both, alright." S said. It was hard to say whether or not he was being truthful.

"How about one each, then?" Michaus said, as the golems got closer and closer. They were still a good distance away, though. They were incredibly slow. 

"Right, works for me." S said. He turned over to me. "Beyes, do you wanna..." He looked uneasy. Yeah, I figure I know where this is going. To be honest, without my magic or the holes, I don't think I'd stand a chance against one of these things. Heck, even with them,  It'd be rough. And I get the feeling-

*THUD*

... I'd wager that these guys probably wouldn't pay all that much mind to a couple jabs with a sickle, y'know?

"I'll sit this one out. Have fun." I said, giving S a thumbs up.

Though I'm certainly happy that I don't have to fight those things, I can't help but feel a little... Bad, I guess. Like there's a stone in my stomach. It wasn't pleasant, needless to say. 

For a moment, S looked a bit uneasy. Then, suddenly, that look on his face was replaced with a smile. "Right. Be careful, Beyes!" S said, turning back over to the stone golems which were still only, like, just over halfway through the room. Man, those things are slow. 

"You too." I said. Why do I gotta be careful? I'm just gonna be sitting here. 

"So, we go now, right?" Michaus asked. Oh yeah, he's here. Ah, that whole thing was probably pretty awkward for him. My sincerest apologies. 

"Right, yeah." S said.

"Great." Michaus said. Then the two of them charged in.

Instead of his usual glass blade, S opened one of the sacks on his belt, stuck out his pointer finger, and created his sand whip thingy. Kinda forgot he can do that, honest. I guess he also figured that pointy things aren't gonna be all that useful here. 

Hmmm... What would I do if I had to fight a creature like this, alone? I mean, the obvious answer is run away, but, if that wasn't an option, how would I, like, not die? 

I guess, currently, my only real option would be hope that my vine enhanced swings are powerful enough to deal with it. Or just warp the thing into the clouds and watch them return to the ground from whence they came at top speed. Though, I couldn't use that on a person, obviously... Ah well, I'll figure it out if it ever comes to that. And, if I don't, there's probably nothing that can stop me from running away. Probably.

It didn't take long for S and Michaus to reach their foes. I won't lie, I was kinda worried about them. I mean, they're plenty confident, that's for sure, but these things are, like, huge, dude.

That said, my worries quickly faded.

First up was S, as he's quite fast. He simply ran up the creature, and just... stood still, for a bit. I was, naturally, confused by this, but the golem didn't seem to think much of it. It just slowly raised it's stoney 'fist', as if it were about to crush a bug. It wasn't until the creature was at the apex of it's swing that S began to move. And move he did. With great speed and precision, he readied his whip, ran between the legs of the creature, and, just as the creatures stone fist collided with the ground, S had wrapped up one of it's legs with his whip. And then, just as fast as the first, the other. It was as simple as that. As the creature lifted it's 'arm' from the ground, S took a few steps away, tugged on his whip, and the creature fell to the floor.

*THUD*

The noise it made was nearly deafening. Wow, it fell hard. That looked like it hurt. I guess 'The bigger they come...' and all that. 

It was at this point that S seemed to be at a loss. He couldn't seem to figure out how to finish the thing off. It was hurt a lot, but it seemed like it intended to pick itself back up. We'll come back to him in a moment.

At about the same time as S, Michaus began his assault. He ditched the torch, instead putting both of his hands on his blade. 

Fortunately, the light coming off of me allowed everyone to see fine, even without the torch. Hey, I've always been known to light up the room! Heh. Heh... No I haven't.  

Anyways, Michaus charged the creature, his hands on his blade, fire in his eyes, and the heart of a hero. Presumably. 

Holy crap, is he gonna chop the thing in half? No... Surely there's no way. Well, this is Michaus...

I couldn't help but imagine Michaus cleanly cutting through the thing like a hot knife through butter, lowering his blade as the golem falls, split into two halves. Maaaaaaan that's cool! OOH! HE'S GOING FOR IT!

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Michaus shouted as he ran towards the creature. Can he do it? I believe in you! Go! Yes! Get 'em!

*tchk*

His blade cleaved off a few inches of stone. 

"Daw man..." Michaus said, disappointed. 

Awww... Wait, that's still, like, crazy, right?! Like, he cut hard stone with a sword!

Michaus gently tossed his blade away. "Guess I'll do it the usual way." He said, still seeming a little disappointed. He ended up a little behind the golem, so it turned to face him, and began making it's way over. In that time, Michaus stuck both of his hands out to the nearest wall of the dungeon. 

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH" He screamed, looking as if he were pulling something of great weight back, and AN ENTIRE CHUNCK OF THE WALL FLEW OUT TOWARDS THE CREATURE, SLAMMING INTO IT AT INCREDIBLE SPEEDS.

Needless to say, the golem took heavy damages. It wasn't quite dead, but it was pretty close. 

Coincidentally, S's golem colliding with the floor and the wall colliding with Michaus's happened at around the same time. 

Man, these two are tough. 

*Thud... Thud... Thud...*

Also at around that same time, I heard something coming from the stairway. I opened the holes (near the top of the stairs, another in my lap. I'm sitting criss cross, by the way.) so I could see what was goin' on.

It was, lo and behold, another freakin' stone golem! Where the heck did that come from!?

I noticed S peek over at the stairway, and he and I made eye contact. He noticed I had the holes out, nodded at me, and went back to his thing. I don't think Michaus noticed anything, he just kept screaming.

Looks like this one's on me. Alright, well, Michaus is otherwise occupied, so it's probably okay to use the holes to deal with this issue. And, fortunately, that shouldn't be too difficult. See, these things are, big, heavy, slow, and seemingly not very intelligent. In other words, they're practically made to fall victim to the holes. 

Okay, some things to consider: I can't move, 'cus that'll be noticed, and I'll leave S and Michaus without a light, which can't be good idea. I also have to make sure that nobody sees what's about to happen. (Except me, so I can make sure it doesn't get back up.) Okay, I think I've got about 3 more thuds before the thing gets into the room, so I've gotta act fast. 

*Thud*

Make that 2. Okay, I open a hole in my lap and open one a few meters above off the ground in the plains, a good distance away from town. Actually, move the one in my lap up so I can stick my head through. 

Peek my head through. Woah, this is still trippy. 

Anyone in the splash zone? I look down beneath the hole. Nope, we're good here. Anyone nearby? I peer all around, and I actually get a pretty nice view of the area. I see the house, the river, the woods, and even town, way over there. Man, it's actually quite nice-

*Thud*

Okay, uhh, uhhh, don't see anyone, TIME TO MOVE! Alright, close the hole outside, put it roughly, like WAY UP THERE. Alright, yeah, looks good, looks fine, okay, throw the one I'm looking through at the room's entrance, make it huge, and...

...

Man, these things are slow. 

I peek over at S and Michaus. Michaus seems to be almost done crushing his thing beneath the very thing it's made out of, and S appears to be strangling his with his whip. The heck did I miss? Wait, how the heck is strangling that thing working? Does it need to breathe?  

Out of the corner of my eye, I notice a large, grey figure step into the room, and thus, into the hole. Huzzah! Its immense weight caused it to fall through in the blink of an eye, and thus, it's fate was sealed. Once it's fully through, I move the hole it fell through back to my lap, so I can watch. 

Yep, there it goes, baby. Ooh, in all this excitement, I've forgotten about my drink. I pull out my cola, take a large swig, and salute the poor creature as it returns to the earth. 

Godspeed, you m-

*CRASH*

OH CRAP THAT WAS LOUD CLOSE THE HOLES CLOSE THE HOLES.

At the same time the crash echoed through the holes, Michaus's golem had ceased moving, and S's golem's head just popped off. Like a toy, or something. 

It seems we had won.

Michaus dropped the pile of  rubble he was magic-ing and went to retrieve his blade. "Whew." He let out. Then he turned over to S and me. "Wha' wazzat?" He asked.

In unison, S and I shrugged. 

"Huh. Okay." Michaus said.

S and I looked at each other. 

"Whew." 

I took a sip of my drink.