"ARE YOU PREPARED, FLESHY?" Mocked the skeleton man as he reeled back the reigns from the top of his horse, looking down upon Todd with a terrible grin. "PREPARED TO BE TRAMPLED UNDERNEATH THE MIGHTY STEED OF CAPTAIN DOCT- HEY!"
In the midst of his mockery, S had recovered enough stamina to run beside the horse and grab a firm grasp of the skeleton man's leg, in hopes to catch him by surprise and anti-climactically drag him off the horse himself.
"HEY HEY HEY!" The skeleton shouted, turning his head to S as he detached his own leg, causing S to stumble backwards. "I'M SAVING YOOOOOU FOR LATER, GOT IT?" He scolded.
"Right, right, fine... Man, he's a lot heavier than he looks..." S said, clearly disappointed that his cheap shot failed. Though, as the leg flew out of his hands and returned to the skeleton, he looked atop the horse and raised an eyebrow thoughtfully.
"GRRRRREAT NOW, WHERE WAS I?" The skeleton said, turning his head back to Todd. "OH YES, CRUSHING YOU BENEATH-"
"Do not move your horse a step closer to me." Todd commanded. "To do so would be an act of shame."
"OHOHO? AND WHY SHOULDN'T I? WHY SHOULD A GUY LIKE ME CARE ABOUT SHAME?"
"That horse. It is a thing of beauty. Strong, too, and obviously very loyal."
"IT IS, ISN'T IT? I PICKED 'ER UP MESELF! STOLE 'ER FROM SOME RICH FELLA JUST LAST WEEK!"
"I can see why. She is a great horse. But you are not a great rider. You're far to rough with your control and your sick games. She's in pain, and clearly tired from lack of sleep. I don't know how you've been keeping her, but I have my doubts about the quality of your care."
"Right, I'd listen to him if I were you." S suggested. "I dunno much about horses, but even I can tell that she's dead tired, especially after all this. If you ask me, I think she's pretty dang sad, too."
"ENOUGH OF THIS! WHAT? ARE YOU GONNA PULL AN APPLE OUT OF YOUR BAG AND MAKE HER YOURS? MAYBE HAVE ME THROWN OFF YOURSELF?" The skeleton mocked, tilting his head upwards so he could better look down upon Todd both literally and metaphorically as he cackled, again, both literally and metaphorically.
"The thought did cross my mind." Todd said. "But, regrettably, no. If you raise your hand, your horse will listen without hesitation. That much I can see. And if she does, I'll kill her with a single strike." He declared, with a well placed dramatic pause. "That is my act of shame."
"HMMM..." The skeleton said, contorting his skull once more. "YOU MAKE A COMPELLING POINT! HOWEVER! I DO NOT CARE! MAYBE I'LL JUST STEAL YOURS AFTER I KILL YOU!"
The skeleton dramatically raised his reigns, ready to lash at a moments notice. Todd furrowed his brow with hatred and disdain as he rolled his shoulders and raised his morning star and his shield.
"BE TRAMPLED BENEATHE MY TERRIBLE HOOV- OH NOT AGAIN WITH THIS!" The skeleton was once again interrupted by S doing the same thing as before, except this time also reaching up and grabbing the arm as well. "WHA- WHY ARE YOUR HANDS COVERED IN SAND THIS TIME? ARE YOU TRYING TO GET YOUR SPINE REARANGED?"
"Maybe." S said, cheekily.
"OH- GIT! AND SCREW OFF!" The skeleton concluded, releasing his constricted limbs just like before.
Unfortunately for him, S was now experienced enough at falling off of things that he was able to land on his feet with relative ease. Even more unfortunately, S immediately turned around and chucked both bones as far away as he possibly could.
S had contemplated using a witty one liner, but considering his target's head was turned and the bones were already starting to fly back at him like a boomerang, S decided to immediately enact his plan.
"TODD!" He shouted at the top of his lungs as he quickly took just a few steps back and charged with as much strength as he could muster, shoving the entirety of his body weight into the body of the horse. Which, of course, caused the horse to let out a terrible pained whinny.
"WHAT'RE YOU- BWEAEAH!" The skeleton exclaimed as he easily tipped right off the side of the horse.
"Righ- OW-" S said from the ground, heavily recoiling from pain as a result of his maneuver. It certainly didn't help that his landing wasn't exactly stellar. "H-hard to stabilize yourself with just one leg, isn't it? Missing an arm don't help much, either. There was no way I was gonna be able to knock that horse down, but it doesn't take that much force to tip an already weighted scale."
"Byeah... I suppose you have something inside that skull of yours, after all." The skeleton said with only 2 capital letters as Todd rushed over and towered over him with his weapon raised. "Not that I would know anything about that."
"If you surrender now, we can get back on schedule and you will be forgiven." Todd said. "If this goes on any longer, we'll be running out of our allotted time for dealing with ruffians."
"Of course you planned for that..." S quipped.
"Hmmmm... HAT! GET OFF THE HORSE." The skeleton said, gesturing towards S with his skull.
The man on the back nodded, as he gently hopped off the horse and landed next to S, who had mostly recovered by now. Though, he was still in a great deal of pain which he tried to conceal.
"Right, they ain't surrendering!" S shouted to Todd with a twitch of his nose.
"AND DO WHATEVER YOU LIKE WITH THE BOY! JUST MAKE SURE HE DOESN'T STICK HIS BONES INTO OUR FUN!" The skeleton shouted, as his skull popped off his neck and rolled across the ground, around and between Todd's legs before eventually ending behind him as his body reformed with his both of his boney hands gripping his equally boney hammer.
"Hold on now, where did he-"
"TODD, BEHIND YOU!" S shouted, fortunately well aware of Todd's bumbling.
"Ah, thank you."
Todd turned, raising his shield and morning star as he stared the great hammer wielding skeleton dead in the eye... Socket.
S stepped back and kept his movement loose as the strong silent mustachioed man stepped closer with a grin on his face, one hand holding a flame, and the other holding a small ball of condensed moisture.
Finally, 2 whole chapters later, these idiots were about to actually start fighting.
"AND GET THIS DAMN HORSE OUT OF THE WAY!" The skeleton abruptly commanded.
