Y'know, I don't think I'd ever taken a good look at the duke's place before. Last time we were here I passed out and was already inside when I woke up, and given the circumstances of our leaving, I didn't really take the time to look back and inspect the exterior of the place.

It was, in a word, big. I knew it was big, but it was big. At least as big as, like, a shopping mall. Maybe even two shopping malls. Or one and a half shopping malls. I suppose it would depend on the size of the shopping mall in question. Point is: Real big.  

"Sheesh. Compensating for something?" S said with a smirk, evidently also figuring out the scale of the place. 

I tried to chuckle courteously, but it ended up coming out as a bit more of a snort. Which better reflected my feelings towards that line. Sis rolled her eyes, though she did seem to chuckle at the joke, if just a little bit.

"Right, heard that one before?" S asked, still looking pleased with himself, obviously undeterred by our not-exactly glowing review. "Is that some old dad joke from whatever secluded mountain or hole you guys came from?"

"Yeah, basically." I said with an actual chuckle.

"A-anyway, speaking of the size of that place, it's worryingly big. You should stick close to me." Sis suggested with a cough.

"Y-yeah, I was thinking the same thing." I said with a nod as I looked up at the rapidly approaching mansion/palace/I don't know what to call it/big house (not metaphorically), whose size was still as previously stated.

"Right, speaking of weird," S began, "wonder why the duke decided to have his place built all the way out here in the woods? Too good to live near the common folk?"

"Maybe it's an ancestral home." I suggested, trying not to totally slander the guy who's technically treating us. Even if there was a little bit of vague threatening pretense to it. 

"Could be a security thing." Sis said. 

"Right, I could see that. Not much reason to come all the way out here unless you're headed for the duke's. Probably pretty easy for the guards to tell who is supposed to be here and who isn't."

"That'd make sense." I said. "Or maybe he just really likes the woods."

 Regardless of the reason for the existence of the place, we would be arriving soon enough. Before long, Todd pulled us into the comically large stable outside, which was looking a lot like a parking lot right about now. Even had handicap spots. Which I imagine worked on the honor system, 'cus I don't know how you'd enforce that without the license plates. I wonder if Todd counts as handicapped? Or does he just fall under 'weird?' Should he be allowed to drive? 

Eh. Probably doesn't matter that much. When the fastest methods of travel in this world are me, Catface and horseback, I can't imagine street cops would get a ton of work. 

"I think we're here!" Todd announced from the front of the cart. "I am relatively certain!"

"Right, you're good, Todd!" S shouted back at him. 

"Wonderful! Everybody out!" 

Thus, everybody out'd, and I made one last check to make sure everyone's clothes were pristine. Partially because of my rapidly growing anxiety about this entire thing, (y'know, random kids surrounded by a bunch of the social elite for seemingly no reason), and partially because I just really wanted everyone to look their best in these fancy clothes. When in Rome, and all that. 

Todd also hopped off his thing, and pulled a saddle out from some compartment under his seat that I didn't realize existed, and he began unhooking one of the horses from the carriage.

"You not going to the party, Todd?" Sis looked up and asked him. "That's unfortunate. That would have been entertaining." 

"No, I am not. Got a catering job lined up." Todd said, switching out his hardhat for a chefs hat. Man of many talents, huh. I presume he changes out of the armor later. "I shall be back by the time festivities end, though." 

"Uh, is that safe?" I asked, recalling our prior conversation with the construction guy. "Is the duke gonna be okay with that?"

"Man's gotta work." Todd explained.

"Right, I wouldn't worry about him." S confidently stated. "I figure he falls under the 'too useful to be angry at' category."

"I could see that." Sis said.

Without closing remarks or anything of that nature, Todd mounted his horse and rode off into the forest. It would have looked really cool if the sun were setting. Unfortunately, it was just shy of midday, so he was only sorta cool.

As we approached what I assume was the entrance, given the glowing arrow signs that were planted into the ground forming a clear path for us to follow, I couldn't help but notice that there weren't all that many carriages in the stable/parking lot. Though, there were a couple of carts who would soon be pulling in. 

"Did we arrive early?" I asked as we walked. "I kinda figured we'd be late, considering how far away we were." 

"Right, think we were supposed to be, but I would imagine the aftermath of the storm delayed some people." S explained.

"But then why weren't we delay- It's because of Todd, isn't it." 

"Right, that's T- Oh. Yeah. Todd." 

That answer really shouldn't be as all-encompassing as it is. 

Soon enough, we arrived at the incredibly large front door, where we were met by an older, very burly man with a lot of facial hair holding a large notepad, and a shorter, clearly much younger looking girl staring at the ground, looking dejected. Both were wearing thin leather and chain armor, similar to what the guards back in Starsford wear. Though, the design was much more festive. Looks like those weird cone party hats are consistent between realities, huh.  Just behind them was a big metal cube with a bunch of magic-y tubes and panels around it that I couldn't gleam the purpose of. 

"Hold there." He sternly said as we approached. "I don't recognize any of yo-" He squinted as he paused. "Hold on a moment."

He began rapidly flipping through the pages of his pad. As he got to the last one, he held it up to his eyes and squinted further.

"Boy in a lot of tan accompanied by boy with evil-looking eyes..." He mumbled loudly. 

S was in slightly less tan than usual, but it seemed that his tie, along with his hair and eyes and the splotches of sand that seemingly never come off like it secretes out of his skin or something were enough to fit the bill. As for the boy with the eyes, well, y'know. 

"I take it that's you lot?" He said.

"Sounds like it." I said, doing what I could to not sound particularly evil.

"Sure does. 'Cept the girl." The man said, gesturing to Sis. "Eye boy's sister, I take it? She your plus one?"

Sis just coughed and shrugged, and I said "Uh, y-yeah." 

 "Alright, here's what's gonna happen:" The man began, in a very rehearsed robot-y way, like a roller coaster operator at a theme park. "You two are gonna scan your fingers on this thingy over here," He gestured to the big machine-y thing. "gonna be some magic sh*t, confirm you are who you say you are." He said, looking directly at S and me intimidatingly, before turning to Sis. "You, are gonna go that way, allll the way around to the side entrance, just follow the signs, and go through a little extra security. All goes well, you got to meet up with your boys again in half an hour. Got that?" 

"Hell no." Sis said, immediately.  

Figured.

"Right, I don't think that's optional." S said with a nervous chuckle. 

"It isn't." The man reinforced.

"Then he's coming with me." Sis said.

"No he isn't. Protocol."

"Then he's not going."

"Don't care."

"Neither do I."

"Uh, a-actually, I..." I interjected before Sis pisses off some random security guard just trying to do his job. "Need to piss. For unrelated reasons."

The man raised an eyebrow at me, and the girl beside him chuckled as she stared at the grass. Don't you laugh at me! I'm about to do something really clever!

"I-I'll still do the finger-scanny-thingy." I said.

"We have bathrooms inside." The man sternly stated.

"I... Can only do it outside." I said.

It was fortunate that I am medically incapable of not straight facing.

The girl started laughing again. As did S. Which was fair. I take S's apparent calmness and not interrupting me as a sign he's mostly caught on with what I'm about to do. Good job, S.

 The man looked like he'd aged a few years as he defeatedly sighed, "That's... Fine. Sure."

 "Great." I said, not being embarrassed because I know I'm about to do something really cool in a few seconds and it won't matter and I'm not overcompensating for anything. 

"That said, you still gotta get moving." The man said to Sis.

"No. I'll let him do the scanning thing, but I'm gonna watch him the entire time." Sis said, letting go of my wrist.

"Just get mov- Oh. Oh, gah- Whatever, alright, just... Just stand there, I guess." He said, before mumbling to himself, "I just don't understand the world anymore..."

IIIIIIII don't think he interpreted that how Sis had intended.

That's- Ah, y'know what, whatever, it's fine. It's probably helpful, if anything. Just don't think about what's going through his head. Just don't think about it.

S was in hysterics, and the girl seemingly couldn't decide between being disturbed and laughing. 

"We'll meet up with you again soonish." I whispered to S as we made our way to the scanny thing. 

"Right, figured." S said. He gets it. 

We did the scanny-fingery-thingy. There was a beep. It sounded good.

"You're good." The man said. 

"Good." I said. We're good.

Sis and I began making our way into the woods, sort of towards the place Sis was supposed to go.

"Just, uh, m-make sure you come back here once you're done!" The man shouted. "Don't, uh, go in with her! Protocol!"

"Okay." I said with a thumbs up. His words were insignificant to me. I was so many steps ahead of him that I was flying while he was barely walking.

Thus, Sis and I went into the woods.

"If you actually need to piss, do it quickly. Animals might be attracted to the smell." Sis suggested.

"N-No, I don't actually need to pee." I said. 

"Figured. Still, better safe than sorry."

"I see." I said, focusing on making sure we were out of sight instead of whatever these conversations had turned into.

Once we were sufficiently secluded, I created a hole in front of us. Of course, I've been in the duke's place before. I have super powers, we are above the need for doors and protocol. 

"Ah. That works." Sis said, not as impressed as I'd have liked. 

I peered into the room I'd opened a hole to, a familiar little waiting area with two couches, beautiful red carpet, and a really reflective table. From the looks of things, it was seemingly perfectly empty. Sweet. 

Thus, we stepped through, and I planted myself down on the couch, feeling pleased with myself.

Sis didn't seem amused.

Man, I forgot how comfortable this thing was. The duke really knows how to pick 'em. I could fall asleep on this thing. Again. 

Buuuut we shouldn't do that. Time to get moving. "A-anyway, we should go mee-"

"Who's there?" Came a familiar voice from behind the couch.

Ah, crap.

"OOOOH! EYE BOY!" Amelia said, popping her head over with an excited look on her face.