Sixth period was College Prep, an English course where there was a discussion of a book I had not read, but I still took notes to keep up appearances at the very least. Nobody talked to me, which is what I wanted, and the whole thing was about as uneventful as could be. I did muse about the minutiae of my current body a bit, but beyond that, there really is nothing to talk about until seventh period.
I walked into the class, Consumer Education, feeling a bit lost before being spying Shiaka(Z), who quickly gestured over to me, as she and Zoe sat next to each other up in the front of the classroom.
“Didn’t you read my notes?” Shiaka(Z) asked, sounding a bit concerned.
“Yeah, I did— we are just watching a video and taking notes, correct?” I timidly replied, my voice shaky after hearing Shiaka(Z) speak with such a serious tone.
“Yes, and we should keep quiet for the entire class because of that… just so we don’t get in trouble, you know.” Shiaka(Z) explained as she tried, and failed, to adopt a more lax tone.
I did as she requested, kept my mouth shut for the entire period, and… I was pretty worried throughout. Having Shiaka(Z) sitting right next to me made me feel as if I was being constantly judged on how well I impersonated her. Because of this, I wound up overthinking and over-analyzing every little thing I was doing. From how I was writing notes to how I was sitting. I know that I should not have felt such concern, but I nevertheless spent the period wrapped in concern. Shiaka(Z) was right next to me and, at any moment, could chide me for my performance… even though that was completely against her nature.
In spite of my paranoia, I still performed the task of watching the short film and taking notes, all until the bell rang, urging me to trot off to my next destination: My College Financial Accounting class.
The classroom was a computer lab, with about a dozen PCs on both sides of the room, every desk fitting two people, and a wall coated in old CD-ROMs. Most of them for additional AOL hours, meaning they were older than me, or free software trials, which were probably also older than me.
Anyhow, I knew where I had to sit in this class, as Shiaka(Z) and I normally shared a desk, and about a minute later, Maxxie(J) came waltzing into the room, where she immediately plopped her butt next to mine.
“So Shiaka, what exactly do we have planned for today?” Maxxie(J) asked after glancing around to see a… 75% full classroom, which was the theme of the day.
“Did you read the notes I left you?” I asked her with a sigh.
“Well, I figured that with you right next to me, I’d get all the directions I needed.”
“We’re just watching a documentary, likely due to how five students are absent today, and we just wrapped up a chapter on Thursday.”
“How lax is the teach? …Erm, I mean, what’s the teacher’s lollygagging policy?”
“Jad, just try to pay attention to the film, you shouldn’t even bother logging into your computer— it would disturb those in the back rows anyhow. We also don’t need to take notes on this.”
“Wait, really?” A chipper voice asked from behind me.
I quickly swiveled around in my chair and turned to face Anita Neukar, a classmate who I knew decently well and worked with a few times before, but I would not call us friends. Although she oddly enough held a long-standing friendship with Vivi Gaimz, who was also behind me in my Calculus class earlier today. It was a curious pairing given how the two seemed like two ships whose paths would never cross.
As a person, Anita was pretty lax on all fronts while exerting a friendly and bright persona that more or less contrasts with Vivi’s serious nature and to-the-point dialect. In addition to that, Anita, not unlike Shiaka, is something an— and I hope this does not sound racist— ethnic abnormality. As she was half Black, half White— which is pretty normal— but she also had grayish eyes, and stark white platinum blonde hair.
Hair that she kept in a long ponytail, with bangs covering her forehead, and long clumps of hair that dangled in front of her ears, stopping at her jawline. She stood 184 centimeters tall and possessed a lean and athletic body, as you would expect of somebody on the school track team. Oh, and she was wearing what would normally be dubbed a male uniform, of a violet shirt, off-white blazer, and off-white slacks. But it was fitted for women.
“Um, yes. I mean, I doubt he would give us an assignment when a sizeable chunk of the class is missing. P-Plus, he does not seem to be the kind of person who would test us on a film we cannot easily review.” I explained to Anita.
As I spoke to her, I found myself fiddling with my fingers and avoiding eye contact with her. I was not expecting to talk to someone else, much less have a close relationship be interrupted so suddenly, so I naturally entered into a nervous stupor of sorts. Which was technically in character for Shiaka.
“Aw, c’mon Shiaka, I’m not gonna hurt you,” Anita said in a sing-song voice as she prepared to tussle my hair.
I let her get in two strokes before I realized what was happening, and that Shiaka very would not be okay with this. Desperate to maintain my image, I quickly tumbled out of the chair and ended up falling onto the tile classroom floor.
“Whoa, you alright Shiaka?” Anita asked as she lent her hand out to help me up, looking positively massive from my current angle.
“Anita, didn’t I— didn’t Maxxie tell you about Shiaka’s—” Maxxie(J) explained, making a classic flub.
“Oh shit, right. Oh my goodness, Shiaka, I am so sorry! I… I’ll just leave you be.” Anita exclaimed before running away with her tail between her legs.
“You alright?” Maxxie(J) asked me as I was getting up.
“Yes, I just… thought it felt nice, but then she touched the head scar and… yeah. I thought I had to do… something.”
Upon letting out a sigh, I began poking at the small part on Shiaka’s scalp where hair no longer grows. It was another injury inflicted by the two monsters who tried to murder Shiaka. While not very noticeable, touching it stirred up bad memories for Shiaka. It was a part of her body that, much like her torso, nobody was permitted to touch without her direct permission.
After that interaction, the period was pretty mundane. We just watched the first thirty-something minutes of Enron: The Smartest Guys In The Room, while Maxxie(J) kept trying to browse NeoGaf on my phone, as she was very clearly uninterested in the film. I was a bit disappointed by her attention span, but I assumed she was fed up with a day in my shoes, and wanted to get back to her original body. Or maybe she was just hungry because we all forgot to eat lunch… likely more the latter than the former.
Anyhow, eighth period ended sooner than later, and Maxxie(J) and I decided to head back to room 1337 for our final period. It was a free period for all of us except for Zoe, or Shiaka(Z) at the moment, which we spent in room 1337 after signing in at the IRC. It was a somewhat improper practice, as students are supposed to spend their study halls in designated rooms, but my school was pretty lax about what you did with your free periods so long as your grades were good. Hell, we could’ve left the building if we wanted to. The front office staff wouldn’t stop us.
Anyhow, after the three of us returned to the miniature classroom, Maxxie resumed the lewd conversation we had a few periods ago.
“So Zoe, you really never fapped before?” Maxxie(J) asked, causing me to wince as I heard my original body say the word ‘fapped’.
“No. I was unaware of how it even worked until you explained the motion to me, remember?” Zoe(M) sternly replied.
“I… don’t remember. I don’t remember a lot of the things I do. Hell, I’d forget my own name if I didn’t etch it into my bedroom door.” Maxxie(J) answered with a smug smirk.
“I think Maxxie is more curious about the reason why you never masturbated,” I added.
“It provides a rush of chemicals through one’s body that creates a pleasant feeling, but is largely unnecessary. …Plus, my mother was dissatisfied with how I had a wet dream and told me to avoid masturbation. Likely due to some old country superstition.” Zoe(M) explained, an awkward expression on his face.
“Oh for the love of Frank’s fudge-filled fudge ‘ems— How many times have I said that shame is for dummies? If it feels good and doesn’t hurt nobody, then go ahead and do it to your heart’s content, you silly goose” Maxxie(J) remarked.
“Yes, we always seem to reach this conclusion, don’t we?” Zoe(M) dryly questioned.
“Conversations are like Pachinko balls. You can’t really tell where they’re going, or something. Nobody knows how they work and people sell them to the yakuza for prizes… I think. Anyway, if you want, you can, y’know, give my neko-neko fun zone a puff-puff after school if doing it in public doesn’t give you the thrilly frills.” Maxxie(J) said as she glared at Zoe(M)’s skirt.
“We are not going to have a masturbation party… fap party… we are not watering the fap tree!” I said to Maxxie(J), trying to go along with her nonsense.
“Fine, mom! I’ll just shift over to the big Q. Who or what makes you want to wiggle your diddler, Zoe-san?”
“I have told you that I am heterosexual, several times in fact.”
“Yeah, but what do you like in a lady? Shins, elbows, feet, what? Give me the character sheet for Zoe Xing’s waifu!”
“Simply because I have a basic sexual attraction to women does not mean I am controlled by that sexuality. While I understand your desire for sex to be viewed as a more casual activity, I personally don’t have much interest in it. If I do get married, it would be with a woman who I admire as a person, and not for their physical attraction. That said, I would want my hypothetical children to have good genes, so I would certainly take appearances into consideration.” Zoe(M) sternly replied.
“Damn. You sure are one calculating gun of a son.” Maxxie(J) whispered.
“You say that as if I should feel bad about that… Actually, I should apologize for my behavior. Simply keeping up your chipper attitude during your classes takes a lot of effort on my part. Plus the missing meal is getting to me.”
“Yep, I am a bit of a jerk when my belly’s empty, and I guess that’s a bod-based trait, not a mental one.” Maxxie(J) said, patting her stomach in response.
It only took a few pats before Maxxie(J)’s hand landed on her crotch, where she began patting her erect penis, with two layers of clothing blocking it, of course.
“Oh right, we never talked about the locker rooms, did we?” Maxxie(J) blurted out.
“Yeah, we didn’t… nothing very interesting happened to me.” I added, wanting to get involved in the conversation again. “I admittedly gave a light rub to my, erm, Shiaka’s—” I said.
“Her neko hole?” Maxxie(J) interjected.
“What?” I replied.
“Well, neko means cat, and what on a woman is—”
“No! I just lightly rubbed the breasts— while keeping the bra on. I… was just curious what that felt like,” I confessed.
“You might not have touched… there, Jad, but I did,” Zoe(M) declared.
“Wait, what?” Maxxie(J) said with fire in her eyes.
“I was simply curious about the vagina’s sensitivity. The experience was a tad… alarming, but also strangely enticing. I find this curious given my disinterest in sexual stimulation. Yet, perhaps, by being in a body more sexually expressive, having masturbated hundreds of times from what you’ve told us, I am becoming more inclined to indulge in this type of stimuli.” Zoe(M) theorized, placing his tiny chin into his hand.
Before Maxxie could grill Zoe(M) for such feats of perversion, the door to room 1337 slammed open. We all diverted our attention to it and were greeted by a nervous-looking Shiaka(Z).
“Sorry for intruding. Zoe, your AP Microeconomics teacher dismissed the class early as only 14 of the 21 class members came today.”
As Shiaka(Z) made her excuse, she sat down at one of the desks.
“I suppose that I should have expected as much. For an AP course, the students in it are awfully irresponsible.” Zoe(M) remarked.
“Well, you came in right in the middle of our fap talk, but I take it your performance during lunch told us all we needed to know.” Maxxie(J) commented, looking down at Shiaka(Z)’s crotch.
Shiaka(Z) gave Maxxie(J) what was probably meant to be a disgruntled look in response. But with her more intimidating facial features, she looked like she was going to hit Maxxie(J) for making such a comment.
“I do not intend to be rude, but is there anything I should know about your behavior throughout the day?” Zoe(M) questioned Shiaka(Z), almost folding his arms over his breasts.
“I… I tried to stay out of trouble, but when Maxxie and I were in Strength and Conditioning, we ran into Yuccot Kikansky.”
As Shiaka(Z) mentioned that name, all three of us groaned in unison.
You see, Yuccot Kikansky is an obnoxious and overweight little moron. He’s a super senior, because he refused to open up a desk book or do the bare minimum in his classes. If he had something wrong with him, like ADHD or a rough life, I could give him a bit of sympathy. But as far as I could tell… he is just a lazy and disrespectful well-off prick. Someone who has been given every opportunity to put his life together and never put forth the effort to pursue any of them. He’s also rather short, about an inch taller than Shiaka’s short original body, yet weighs about twice as much at 90 kilograms.
Thanks to our class schedules, Zoe and I had to see this man every day in Strength and Conditioning. There, he would distract the rest of the class, do his best to avoid any work, and then be awarded a zero for the day— not that he really cared though. He struck me as the sort of person who would age fast and die young, refusing to put in even the most basic amount of effort into the most minor of tasks.
Backstory aside, Maxxie(J) decided to lead the storytelling here instead of Shiaka(Z).
“Yeah, after a little changing incident — I got a boner, while undressing, but nobody saw it— Shiaka and I were in our little tracksuits, looking so cute. We went into the… what’s the name again, the gym with the rock-climbing wall and the ceiling ropes full of shuttlecocks? Anyhow, we were just going to do some light jogging, chatting a bit about proportions, the prominence of pretty boys in Japanese media, and retractable penises. You know, the usual shit.”
“You asked whether I would want a retractable penis, and I quickly said no. We did not talk about them.” Shiaka(Z) plainly retorted.
“Whatevs,” Maxxie said, waving away Shiaka(Z)’s comment. “Anywho, we just so happened to have Yuccot waddle up to us, and… I’m pretty sure he misheard us or just inferred we were talking about girls. We kinda were, but he took it to a sexual place. Being the badical bestie that I be, I played the sitch with J-Style and told him that I was not into that sort of thing. That I, Jad Novus, was an asexual! Yuccot, the dork, only understood two sexualities, and thought that being asexual meant that ‘Zoe’ and I were ‘butt buds’.” Maxxie(J) continued, flailing around her right hand as she spoke.
“I tried explaining to Yuccot that sexuality was fluid, diverse, and was not tied to the binaries of gay and straight.” Shiaka(Z) elaborated.
“Yuccot briefly tried expanding his scope of sexuality, but went back to square one by dismissing subdued sexualities as, “gay-ass bullshit.” So Shiaka told him off for being such an idiot, saying not everybody had to be such a… ugh, you worded it real nicely too…” Maxxie(J) said as she clenched her temple.
“I said that he was a ‘pitiful simpleton who lacks any true understanding of humanity’ for daring to make such a claim. I then said he was ‘nothing but a burden on society, ignorant of the world around him,’ and pointed out how he was ‘dismissive of all new information that people try to bestow upon him.’” Shiaka(Z) recounted.
“Not precisely how I would phrase it, but that was quite good, Shiaka.” Zoe(M) complimented Shiaka(Z)..
“With that, Yuccot called us a pair of lowercase F-bombs, and uppercase F-bombed off for the rest of the period. With that sour experience in my mind, I started talking about the time Yuccot told me about the box of kittens he threw into a river— which Shiaka said was ‘just a rumor.’ But, I dunno, it seems pretty darn plausible.” Maxxie(J) mused.
“Where would he have gotten the kittens anyway?” I asked.
“He could have gotten them from a pet store and killed them for fun. Besides, you remember the Vivi Gaimz incident. Really surprised he was not outright expelled for the shit he said. I mean, that’s on the level of bad as Master of Martial Hearts. … I still gots no clue how the studio behind Elfen Lied could ever make that steamy hot pile of bloodstained feces…” Maxxie(J) said, ending her story and starting up a new topic.
“Is Elfen Lied anime with the naked girl with pink hair and horns?” Shiaka(Z) cautiously asked.
“Yes, it is also something that should not be viewed by minors, but Maxxie saw it when she was… nine?” Zoe(M) said with a stern look on his face, which just looked wrong.
“Spring break 2006, baby! Babs took me to the DVD and VHS shop and I got to pick out whatever I wanted for getting good grades on my tests. I snuck into the back of the store and picked out the coolest box I could find in, like, ten seconds. I showed her the box and she bought it for me, and I stayed up all night watching it. It. Was. The. Freaking. Best. Shit! No hyperbole or anything, but without that little delight, this Maxxie Flare would not exist, no way, no how!”
It was surreal seeing Maxxie(J) get so worked up when she was in my body. But it was another level of surreality when she sounded more enthusiastic about Elfen Lied than I have been about anything in my life.
“It also inspired you to take art classes over the summer… where you got in trouble for drawing naked ladies, right?” I added.
“Yeah, that was great… I drew nipples that looked like gumdrops back then,” Maxxie(J) said, a fondness in her voice.
With that, the bell rang as the clock struck 3:23, we promptly left room 1337, and walked out the front entrance, waving goodbye to the security guards.
Verde: Don’t you think it’s odd that your school has security guards?
Hm? Not really. It’s a government regulation.
Verde: Yes, but is it not a bit unnecessary?
Not really. School shootings still happen, Miss Dusk, and even if they only stand around, observing and reporting, they still keep some order. That, and they keep weirdos from walking in with a bunch of napalm so they can set the school on fire.
Verde: Duly noted…
