He's Not Here
It's morning.
I prepare myself. I eat my breakfast, brush my teeth and then take a bath. It only took me almost two hours to prepare myself completely. I then ride a tricycle towards the school.
I wonder how should I interact with Mister Reverren. It will feel awkward. I shouldn't just talk to him. I don't think I can even have an eye contact with him.
I clench the strap of my backpack.
“!!”
That's right. Mister Reverren waited for me in the front gate yesterday right?
Will he still come today?
I suddenly feel nervous and anxious.
I still don't know how to interact with him after all.
I should really just ignore him.
The tricycle stops at the front gate. There are just few students inside the campus.
I came earlier than my usual schedule.
I look around and didn't see him around. My heart is beating a lot right now because what if he's just at the other side of the gate waiting for me?
But I was cold to him yesterday. However, I feel like mister Reverren isn't somebody to get mad easily. So perhaps he would be here.
“Good morning po ma'am.”
The security guard greets me but I can't respond to him. I'm feeling really nervous right now.
He awkwardly scratches his cheeks then he walks back to his post.
Now I'm inside the campus.
Several buildings, few early bird students, few staffs, and few teachers are in the school. That's all though.
There's no mister Reverren waiting for me with his default smile.
He isn't here.
Haha.
What am I expecting?
Of course he won't be here.
I was... I was so cold to him after all. I rejected his kindness. So why would he still be here waiting for me?
There's just no way. It doesn't make any sense.
I speed up towards the faculty building to have my attendance.
In the hallway, there are three teachers queueing in front of the wireless biometric attendance system.
I stand behind the last teacher to wait for my turn. She looks behind and nod at me as a greeting. I just nod back at her.
After I had my attendance, I begin walking towards my office. Looking around inside, I can't help but remember what happened yesterday again.
I feel really sorry right now.
I'm the one who hurt his feelings so why am I feeling sad for myself. Besides, I just did what's right.
I shake my head trying to dispell my thoughts. I should focus in teaching. I prepare my things while waiting.
I won't attend the flag ceremony today. I don't feel like it.
「07:40 AM | Tuesday」
I carry my things and start walking towards the classroom.
But when I am near the front door, I pause for a while.
I mean, mister Reverren is my student. And he would be here.
No! I need to teach. I can't let personal matter to interfere with my work.
I inhale and exhale softly before going into the room.
“““Gooooood morning ma'am Iris~”””
My students stand up to greet me.
“Good morning. Please take your sit.”
They look behave. That's good.
“We'll tackle a new topic. I hope you listen properly.”
“........”
They nod at me.
“Secretary, who's absent today?”
A tall and skinny girl wearing black glasses stands up.
“Um... Ma'am, there's only four absentees today.”
“Is mister Martini absent again?”
That guy is neglecting his studies. He's frequently absent and I always hear complaints about him from the other subject teachers.
I heard he's always playing basketball and have several missing outputs.
I should call his parents.
“Who's the other three?”
“Ah. It's Reverren, Pablo, and miss Hecate po ma'am.”
Eh?
“What? Who's the first one you mentioned?”
“Uhm.. Mark Reverren po. Reverren is absent po ma'am.”
I am trying to not look around because I don't want to have an eye contact with him but...
He's not even here?
What is he doing being absent?
If he's mad at me, then be mad at me. He shouldn't neglect his studies because of it.
I grit my teeth trying to calm down.
“Sit down.”
She sit back on her seat.
I look around and his seat is really empty.
Hmm.
“Why is the trash can haven't been emptied?”
They avert their gazes.
Secretary raises her hand.
“Ma'am, it's Martini's duty for the day po.”
“So? You know that he's absent right? Then why are you depending on him for that? Are you just going to let those trash rot in here if mister Martini won't throw them away?”
“..........”
“Which group does he belong to? Who's the leader?”
A girl with thick make up raise her hand.
“It's me po ma'am.”
“Why didn't you do your duty as the leader? You should have managed your group well. And if they don't, then do the job yourself and inform me about them.”
“...s..orry... po... ma'am... I will remember...”
“Sit down.”
She sit back with lowered head.
“Miss Sevada and Miss Tellisha.”
“Uh... What is it po ma'am?”
Miss Tellisha asks with a wry smile.
“Ma'am.”
Miss Sevada stands up straight.
“The both of you are members of the SSG. You two are ought to be role models for the students so why did you not do your obligations?”
“I'm sorry po ma'am... I was being neglectful.”
Miss Tellisha lowers her head and apologizes immediately.
“I came late today po ma'am.”
“Is that an excuse?”
“........”
“All of you stand up and start cleaning. We'll start the lesson twenty minutes from now.”
My students stand up hurriedly from their seat going towards the broom box.
The amount of cleaning supplies we have are far more lower than the number of students.
So some of them are just pretending to be cleaning or they're just arranging the chairs even though it's already been properly arranged.
Hahh~
I leave the classroom because dusts are flying in the air everywhere.
“Why does ma'am sounds like she's in bad mood today? Lovelife?”
“Will somebody even like her?”
“Shhh! Ma'am is just outside. Shut your mouth.”
“!!”
I....
I don't know what to say...
「09:24 AM | Tuesday」
It's morning break. And I'm currently sitting on my chair in my office with nothing to do.
I'm just staring at my close door waiting for something... Or perhaps someone.
But nobody is coming.
「11:57 AM | Tuesday」
It's already lunch break. But I don't have the appetite to eat anything. I'm once again looking at my door.
But it's almost noon and there's no sign of somebody coming.
I bite my lower lip.
Just what am I doing?
Just what am I still expecting for?
He's not coming back.
I should go early to my next class. And just focus into teaching.
「02:45 PM | Tuesday」
It's the afternoon break. And I'm going back to my office.
Hm?
The secretary of my class section is currently walking with her friend towards the canteen.
I have a question for her.
“Ah! Good afternoon po ma'am.”
She looks surprised when I stopped in front of her.
“Good afternoon po ma'am Iris.”
Her friend greets me as well but she looks afraid.
“Is mister Reverren in school?”
“Eh. No po ma'am. He's absent for the today. Why po ma'am?”
What?
“It's nothing.”
I walk away going back to my office. But this time, I feel really angry.
Absent?
For the whole day?
Why?
It's fine if he wants to skip my lesson but why be absent throughout the day as well?
I know this is my fault but...
Just why does he need to let this affect his study?!
This is so...
This is my fault... So I can't really blame... I need to understand...
I bite my lip and clench my fist. I can feel my nails digging into my palms.
It hurts.
This is more painful than I expected.
But this is fine. This is fine. This is just temporary...
I still did the right thing. This is the right choice.
I still did.
So just endure this for a while. It will be better soon.
