Swamp X Bobby

 

 

        Cleetus yawned and stretched his arms. He opened his eyes to the stars in the sky, then he expertly used his hooks to scratch his nose.

  He smiled at his success in controlling his aura. It has been forty-two days since he explored the temple. Thankfully Bobby was busy massacring, which gave him enough time to reach the cabin without getting caught.

  Once he reached the cabin, Cleetus slept like a babe, but when morning came. He did the same exact routine, then finally, he practiced with his Nen. Hamza told him that he should master the basics before seeing what type of Nen user he is.

  Cleetus spent ten days mastering Ten by blocking body projectiles that Bobby threw at him.

   Twenty days to master Zetsu, which was the hardiest since he practiced with Bobby by hiding in the bushes.

  He spent five days for ren, which is the easiest for him, and finally, Hatsu took him seven days to master.

  He yawned again, then he hopped from his hammock. “Welp time ta see mah Nen, and what type of Nen user am I.” Cleetus yawned again; he walked towards the cabin, but he swiftly cut a small leaf from a nearby plant before entering.

  Cleetus walked into his damp cabin; he dodged some of the filth he left around to reach the kitchen area, where he used his Nen to hold a glass of water.

  After preparing everything, Cleetus looked at a glass of water with a leaf on top. Then, he placed his hooks around the cup and began channeling his aura.

  A steady stream of white mist escaped his body, covering the water. Gradually he saw the water change; he saw the water bubbling slowly, then steam began rising. Finally, the leaf on top changed to a corn kernel.

  Cleetus raised an eyebrow at the change, but he kept on channeling. He saw the steam change in the air into different shapes. Nodding at his progress, he bent his hook down and licked the moisture from the rusted metal.

  Cleetu’s body shivered, and a single tear fell down on the floor. “Did I just create some moonshine with mah aura?” Then, after contemplating it for a while, Cleetus smashed his head on the bottle and drank it all up like a starved dog; he drank and drank. But his body was not satisfied.

  In his thirsty haze, he brought a wooden bucket of water and changed it into moonshine. And drank it all. Cleetus looked up into the air and screamed after burping. “I FUCKING LOVE NEN!” And that was the last thing Cleetus remembered.

 

 

 

  Third-person.

 

     A drunk Cleetus walked out of the cabin; one of his two overall buttons was torn open, revealing his massive beer gut. His face is as red as a redneck could be. Yet, he had this dumb smile on his face while his eyes turned a transparent milky white color.

  In his drunken stooper, Cleetus had a wooden bucket filled with moonshine. He looked around. “OI BOBBY! YA FUCKIN GAITOR! COM ERE U SUMBICH!”

  Next to the portal, a massive Alligator by the name of Bobby popped its head from the bushes; it gave Cleetus a curious look while biting the head of a screaming person.

  Cleetus, not the patient sort, looked around and spotted Bobby; he walked slowly towards Bobby. And while giving him a menacing look, Cleetus popped his head back and drank the whole bucket full of aura moonshine.

 Cleetu’s belly grew and grew, splashes of moonshine splashed around the muddy ground, a steady amount of steam escaped from the mud, and the mud began dissolving.

  Cleetus threw the bucket to the side and burped loudly as a battle cry. “MAH FREEDOM!” And Cleetus charged at the confused Bobby. Sweat, mud, and moonshine flowed with his charge.

  His skin turned unnaturally red, and steam began pouring from his body. His massive belly slowly shrunk with each step he took.

  Cleetus jumped across the river, and when he landed, a massive shockwave splashed mud and steam across the battlefield. In Cleetu’s place was a massive ten-foot-tall red monster, swollen muscles replaced the fat he had, steam escaped his pores, covering him with boiling clouds of alcoholic haze that boiled away the grass nearby.

  Bobby, feeling threatened, stood to his full high and screeched at Cleetus; his massive tentacle-like tongues splashed blood and water in the air. Bobby’s maw showed rows upon rows of sharpened yellow fangs.

  Cleetus smirked and charged at Bobby; the first two steps were firm and controlled, but then the third step was wobbly, and Cleetus slipped.

  At that moment, Bobby charged at Cleetus; his tongues flailed around, hitting any tree, stone, or body. Smashing them or throwing them to the side.

  Cleetus, in his drunken haze, stood up barely, and he saw Bobby charging him. He laughed a drunken laugh. “Yah, look like a chicken, Bobby!”

  From the huge amount of alcohol he drank, Cleetus could hardly keep his mind together. Still, he could not react when Bobby picked him up with his mouth because of his absent-mindedness.

  Bobby swung his jaws up in the air, flinging Cleetus over one hundred feet up. Cleetus still not realizing what is going on. “Man, dat moonshine iz great!”

  Cleetu’s body was pulled back by gravity, and under him was Bobby with his massive jaw open wide for the free meal he is about to have.

  The ten-foot-tall red and steaming monster slammed into Bobby’s mouth, and Bobby swallowed him whole.

  Inside the dark belly of the beast was a drunken Cleetus, covered with slime and acid. He opened his eyes to a half-eaten corpse of a human. Which made the drunken Cleetus laugh out loud. “Ya look like a zombie, you sumbitch!”

  After swimming in the acid for a while, Cleetus complained. “Man, it’s too damn hot!” and instinctively, he released more and more hot alcoholic steam.

  On the outside, Bobby’s belly grew and grew, but he could not thrash around much, on account that Bobby’s last meal made him really drunk; he laid on his side. His massive jaws opened wide while his tongues lazily flailed around.

  Bobby hiccupped once, and his eyes lazily blinked before burping a huge amount of steam. Then, feeling a little relieved, he tried to change his position, but then he found that he could not move.

  His body was full of steam, which turned him into a massive balloon; his blue feathers turned red from the heat he produced. Feeling panicked, he opened his mouth wider and released more and more steam, but the amount his belly produced was more than he could release.

  And in his final moment’s Bobby’s eyes budged and popped from their sockets. Then a massive shockwave of steam and flesh scattered across the swamp.

  Silence followed the explosion. And in a prison of flesh and bones was a red giant that still produced more alcoholic steam. Cleetus stood up, his body covered with blood and guts, and he laughed. “Hehe, dey go boom!” Cleetus, still drunk, wobbled his way north.

 

 

 

    Cleetus yawned and snuggled with the nice pillow he was sleeping with; he felt the nice heat is produced, and it made him too lazy to wake up. So he rubbed his arms around the furry pillow, and it made him smile…’Hold up… Furry pillow?’

  Opening his eyes, he saw trees dotting up the sky, with a small light shining from the top. He saw red mangos attached to these trees, but slowly he turned his head to whatever he was holding.

  Cleetus saw a massive seven feet tall, furred body of a gorilla that was spooning him. He was the little spoon. ‘Da fuck?’

  Ever so gently, he tried to move away, but the massive gorilla hugged him harder, and it almost made him shout in pain. He stayed there for a while, contemplating what the fuck happened to him. ‘The last thing I remember was…testing out my Nen and… Holy shit! I remember now, I can create moonshine!’

  The gorilla rolled around while carrying him, and it smashed him on the ground. Cleetus groaned in pain. ‘Aight, I know I can create moonshine now… But how the fuck am I here?!’

  The gorilla opened its eyes and looked at him, then it smirked. Cleetus, nervous from the hug, smiled at it. “Yo.”

  The gorilla bent down and kissed his forehead, then it started petting him. ‘Da fuck?’ The gorilla opened its arms, setting Cleetus free. Unsurely, Cleetus moved away and looked around.

  He saw a swarm of clay monkeys sleeping around, most of them were holding stone cups, and they were sleeping. Cleetus, ever so curious, picked one of these cups and smelled it. “That’s fucking moonshine. But, wait, are they all hungover?”

  Cleetus felt something tapping his shoulder; he turned around and saw the gorilla looking at him, then the gorilla pointed at the ground. He looked down at a message written on the dirt. ‘Good morning, honey.’ Cleetus scratched his beard; his brain gave up at this point. “Hold up… you can understand me?”

  The gorilla nodded and wrote something down. “Before you came, the man of cloth taught us his language.”

  “Alright… So can you tell me what the fuck happened?” The gorilla giggled, which disturbed Cleetus.

  “Yes, my king, you came in the dead of night, covered with the blood of the guardian; you came to us red in skin and angry. You demanded a duel from my previous husband. “Then she pointed at another gorilla covered with bruise marks.

  Cleetus grew more worried. “Alright, what happened next?”

  “You beat him, and you because the new king of the clay.” The gorilla nodded with a satisfied smile.

  Scratching his arm with his hook, Cleetus asked. “So… how come we were hugging?”

 “Oh, my king, you were so tired from your.” The gorilla winked. “Exercise that you slept in my arms.”

  Dread is all that Cleetus felt in that moment, he brought his hooks up to his skull, and he starts scratching himself. “Oh God, Oh Jesus! Please don’t make it true!”

 

The gorilla tilted its head, then she poked Cleetus again. “What is wrong, my king?”

 Cleetus turned around; his eyes are full of worry. “Did we do it last night?!” He smashed his hooks against each other.

 The gorilla’s cheeks flushed pink. “My king, you are so daring today, but no, we did not… do it… yet.”

 

Cleetus began reading the gorilla’s writing. First, he calmed down, but when he read that, they will do it later. “What do you mean yet?”

 

“Oh, in one year, we will consummate the marriage, then you will be a true king :)” She added a smiley face.

 Cleetus nodded, but his mind was thinking of a way to escape. “So just out of curiosity… What is my authority as a king?”

  “You can command all clay monkeys, and they will follow your orders. But you should call me by my name.”

 

Cleetus scratched his beard. “Augh, what’s your name?”

 

The gorilla fluttered her eyelashes. “It’s Princess.”

 “Of course, it is.”

 

 

  

   In the first month, Cleetus tried to run away. But he could not get past the sand barrier; he tried again and again. But in the end, he failed.

  The second month, he gave up. And accepted his fate of becoming the gorilla king.

  The third month, Cleetus returned back to the cabin, just to check things out. And he found the portal to be broken. But what caught his interest was the massive battlefield around the cabin. Swarms of mini-Bobby’s fought each other.

  When he asked the Princess, she told him that whenever a guardian dies. The shining gate stops until a new guardian emerges.

  This sparked hope in Cleetus, and he set up a plan of escape. First, he would train his Nen until he becomes really good at it. Then he will fight the new guardian and run away from the forced marriage he was in.

 In the fourth month, Cleetus learned more about his Nen; he was a specialist. And because he really wanted to moonshine again, his Nen allowed him to do so.

  He learned that his body changed to become a boiler. And every time he eats sugar, fruits, or moonshine ingredients, his body uses that to create the alcoholic steam.

  In the fifth month, he discovered a way to control the steam. Now he no longer relayed on his hooks, but he could create steam to carry stuff for him.

  In the sixth month, he returned to the cabin and saw the mini-Bobby bigger in size but less in numbers. And he knew that a new guardian was about to be made.

 In the seventh month, Cleetus was depressed because he did not see any humans for a long time, and he masturbated to an extra thick piece of wood the other day.

  In the eighth month, he decided to explore more about the swamps; he saw the death archipelago, full of deadly poisons gasses. And he used it to train his aura to block toxins.

  In the ninth month, Cleetus designed a pickup truck made from wood. It could run on his alcoholic steam Nen. Thankfully he had the full support of the clay monkeys to help.

  In the tenth month, Cleetus returned back to the cabin. “Good, only five more Bobby’s and one of you sumbitchs will open the door for me.”

  On the eleventh month, he saw Princess preparing for the wedding, and it only made him jumpier. But on the bright side, the pickup truck was done, and he ordered the clay monkeys to gather food and supplies for his trip. He lied to the Princess and told her that it was for their honeymoon.

   In the final month, Cleetus peaked from a bush he was hiding in. he took a small sip from his moonshine and looked at the battle between bobbies’. He saw them biting each other, choking each other.

  When he saw one of them jump the other and chock them out. He stood up and powered up his Nen; he used Zetsu to hide his aura.

  And when he saw one of them die. He waited until he saw the new Bobby roaring to the sky, his body changing and gaining blue feathers instead of white.

  He saw the portal behind Bobby opening up. At that moment, Cleetus charged up his feet and charged at the roaring Bobby.

  Cleetus charged his Nen on his right hook; his hook turned red from the heat, the steam coming out was blinding his right side. The veins on his feet bulged up and turned slightly red.

  Cleetus jumped in the air and shouted. “150 PROOF PUNCH!” a shock wave of pure steam hit the new Bobby, sending him flying back. And knocking him out. Cleetus smiled. “Now that is what I call 75% alcohol punch.”

  He calmly walked to Bobby and opened a small vein; green blood gushed out, and Cleetus poured it on small wooden bowel.

  Smiling to himself, he jumped back into the river and ran all the way north, towards the, exist of the swamp. “Come on, Cleetus, you got to run; I ain’t paying child support!”

 

 

 

   Arriving at the last island, Cleetus saw his wooden pickup truck. In the back, there were bags and bags of dried mangos, fish, and all that is good. Next to them were containers full of freshwater and moonshine he made.

  Cleetus brought the wooden bowel and started smearing some of the green blood on himself, then he added more to the top of the car just for safety. After finishing with the spread, he looked back at the swamp again. “So long you a stinking swamp, I AM GOING TO GO SEE SOME HOT CHICKS!”

  Laughing, he jumped in the truck and placed the wooden bowel next to him, then he drank some moonshine and powered up his legs with steam.

  The car’s wooden engine began pumping, and Cleetus smiled, then created two steam hands to handle the steering wheel.

  He shifted the gears, and the car sprang into action. Smiling to himself, he took it all in; the green slowly faded away to a sandy area.

  In front of him was the massive wall of moving sand that prevented him from escaping before, but this time. He saw the green blood on him glow.

  Suddenly he heard a massive cry from the back. He turned his head and found an army of clay monkeys following him, leading said army was Princess who was really mad.

  She signed with her hands. “I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU! COME BACK HERE!”

  Cleetus did the only thing a deadbeat like himself would do. “FAK YOU U DUMB BITCH! I AIN’T PAYIN YOU SHIT!” She screamed, and the army went into a frenzy.

  He laughed at them, but he saw those massive rocks covering the sand wall in the distance. On these rocks were monkeys waiting for him.

  “Fuck… I am going to need more moonshine!” Cleetus reached to the back, and with his hook, he pulled a gallon of Moonshine; with one great chug, he emptied it all. Then gradually, his skin began turning bright red. He screamed. “WITNESS ME!” The pickup truck roared with fury, his steam ignited, and the engine went into overdrive.

  A massive cloud of sand sprayed behind him; his cheeks were pulled back from the force. And when he reached the sand wall. He dodged the blockade of spears, stones, and the occasional suicidal monkey trying to attach themselves to his pickup truck.

   When he reached the wall of sand, he saw a massive blockade of stone and shit blocking him, but Cleetus smiled and charged more steam into his pickup truck. He could barely see because of the air pressure, but he knew what he was doing.

  He created another set of massive steam arms, and when he was about to reach the blockade, he pushed the arms down, forcing the car to sail into the sandstorm. “WITNESS! ME!” He screamed his last war cry and his car smashed into the sand wall.

 

  Behind him, the massive army of monkeys stopped their charge; the Princess stayed still and sighed. “I really wanted some of that man's meat.”

 Another gorilla swayed in. “So… Does Mongo Mongo has a chance with you, babe?” The Princess punched him.

 

 

A group of tourists looked at the wonders of the Yorbian desert. But, unfortunately, not much is known about this part of the world. So the hunter association finally gave up and opened it to the public.

  The group saw the massive clay walls of sin, where a thousand artistic depictions of torture were drawn on the mountain.

  Then they saw the deep wells of a lost tribe, but what they really came for was a wonder of the world. A massive sand waterfall that reached four hundred feet tall and five hundred feet wide.

  The bus finally stopped, and the first-ever group of tourists emerged to watch the waterfall; a pretty lady smiled at them. “No one ever knew how the Samadi falls works, our top scientist tried to unlock its secrets, but they failed. The problem is that no one knows where the sand comes from, but it keeps falling.”

  She smiled some more. “There are some local rumors about the falls; some say that if bad people showed themselves to the falls. First, it will judge them, then it will send its screaming executioner to kill these bad people.”

  The guide winked at a couple and their child, then she approached them. “How about we test your son? If he is a good boy, we will give him this nice teddy bear!”

  The little boy in the group jumped around excited for the teddy bear, but then he stopped. “Will the falls kill me?”

  The guide laughed. “Don’t worry, it won’t.” She took hold of the little boy and placed him near the viewing point of the falls.

  She opened a small book. “Now, I will read an ancient script of the local legend; once the prayer is uttered, we will summon the falls to judge you.” She turned around. “The book is a thousand Jenny in the gift store, don’t forget to get one.”

  The guide smiled and spoke in a broken language. “Hak’tok mak’lok, Sivar’ Omnaz offzx bosafa!” Then, finally, she screamed the last part, and nothing happened.

  “See, you were a good boy, now.” Then, just when she was about to hand him the free teddy bear, they heard a rumbling sound from the falls.

  Fire, Steam, and a screaming voice rose. A wooden vehicle emerged, spraying hot sand all over the place. “WITNESS MEEEEEEEE!” The vehicle crashed into the tour bus; from the vehicle, a red man spewing steam all over the place. Fire and haze surrounded him. He turned around and looked at the tourist group. “Augh… You know where a fella might get sum apple pie around ere?” The tourist group ran away screaming.

    “What did I say sum thing wrong?” Cleetus commented while scratching his steaming beard.