Emilia noticed that she was conscious, although she seemed to be unable to see. Had her death failed? Had she adapted to become even more invulnerable than before? Although, if she was blind, that seemed unlikely. A grim mixture of calm and despair started to settle into her heart, she wondered if she could still cry? She supposed it depended on the reason she was blind. "Do not cry young one." A strange voice filled her... well, she was not really sure. It was certainly not her ears. "You succeeded in your quest to abandon your former life. I have bargained for your soul at a heavy price, and you now float within one of my realms." Emilia considered her situation, it would make sense that she was dead, as she could think of no situation that would render her permanently blind if she was still living. She was never taught about life after death, she considered it once or twice, but as her people had no superstitions, stories, or theories regarding it, she herself was unable to guess if there even was an afterlife or not. "Do you want me to kill people for you too?" Emilia called out, she did not speak exactly, but the words simply flowed from her mind, and they were filled with sorrow.
The voice replied softly, a tinge of sadness hidden deep within it. "Well, you may have to kill again, but I mostly just wanted to give you a chance to live, free of your previous chains. You were such a bright child; you and your two friends were like a beacon of innocence in a world of darkness. In-fact, the three of you were quite the anomaly of your world." Emilia struggled for a moment, a refreshing feeling. For the first time in a while, she was unable to instantly recall the face of Jaz, and the voice of Gilly. "Are they here as well?" She said, a desperate hope in her voice. She wanted Jaz to forgive her, she wanted to apologize for not believing Gilly when she spoke of the rumors. The voice replied, burdened with regret. "Alas, I could only choose one soul for this opportunity, and the God of Intelligence jealously guards the souls in his dominions, his price for your friends would have been far too costly. However, there is one way for you to be reunited with them, should you desire it, but it requires you to kill many people again." Emilia tried to shake her head. "I... can't. I don't want that again." She cried as she hazily remembered the faces of her victims, but again she found some relief, she could no longer recall every detail about them.
"I have to send you back to the world of the living." The voice spoke, its voice still laden with regret. "You see, I was able to bargain for your soul because the God of Intelligence was amused that I would try and recruit a killing machine to represent me. I am the One Most Pure, or rather, that is what most of my followers call me. In reality I am nothing more than a god who presides over the innocent." Emilia laughed bitterly "I can see why the other gods must have laughed when you chose me. Innocence is the opposite of who I am." The voice's reply was tinged with anger this time. "No! This is a falsehood! Your innocence was taken from you, you did not give it away or sell it. You did not abandon it for self-gain or cheap thrills. You were a smiling child, born into a world of cold metal. Not even your mother recognized you as anything more than a subject. You did nothing wrong." Emilia struggled with the voice’s words. She knew that she never wanted any of the things that happened to her, she only wanted to learn, and to see the sky with Gilly, and to eat good food with Jaz, and to play in a field with Foxy... However, all of that was gone in a sea of blood. Her hands were not covered in it, she drowned in it. Blood filled her eyes and her mouth and her nose, sinking into her clothes and her very bones. She could never be that little girl again. She could never have the life that she talked about in the late nights of the barracks with her friends.
A time of silence passed before either Emilia or the voice spoke. "Can you just send me away? Or destroy me?" The voice replied, the anger giving way to sadness once again. "I could, but I would much rather give you a chance to live a life outside of those cold metal walls. Both the ones that surrounded you, and the ones that were inside you for many years. The sky, food, animals. I wish for you to see all of it. I wish every abused child, every stolen innocence could be undone, and I perhaps even could accomplish such a thing if I made you kill for me. However, I would never taint the innocence of one child, even to save every other." Emilia did not understand what the voice was talking about. "Let me explain then." The voice's sorrow only seemed to deepen as it spoke. "The gods often squabble and fight amongst one another. However, large wars are... no longer allowed. To solve this limitation, the gods will set up various games as stand in for their wars. Almost always using mortals. One such game is about to begin; however, this game is not to settle a dispute, but rather a special game. It takes place of its own accord. The game calls to the gods, and we must answer. To the god that wins, a prize unlike any other is granted. However, in order to win, their champion must subdue or kill all other champions. I intend to send you to this game, not so that you may kill in my name, but because it provided me an opportunity to grant even a single innocent child their wish to see the sky, to be free of their accursed life." Emilia absorbed the being’s words, a killing game. This being, this innocent god or whatever, claimed it would not send her to fight, even though it sounded as if winning would allow him to... become much stronger? She was unsure exactly what the reward was, but it sounded important. She reflexively did not trust the being speaking to her, everyone who "sent her" places had lied to her. However, she found it difficult to keep her suspicion going, perhaps a feature of this so-called deity.
"I am sorry you wasted your time and resources on me. I cannot live again. I can't live remembering everything I’ve done, and my lost friends. It is too much for me." The voice took time to reply. "I know that. I know that you could not make new friends while remembering the old ones. I know you could not look at the sky, without seeing a horizon of blood every time. This is why, if you wish, I will arrange it so your memory is broken, shattered, you will forget nearly everything from before you were reborn." Emilia struggled internally at the very thought. She had not even been capable of forgetting a single word uttered by the people she slaughtered, and now someone offered her the chance to forget all of it? Did she even have the right to forget? To live as if she had not committed such atrocities? "If you cannot forget for your own sake, forget your actions for the sake of the little girl who wanted to take her fox and see the sky. Forget for the sake of the girl who loved her mother, but was not loved in return." Emilia struggled as her heart bled tears. "But if I am to be sent to a killing game, a game where those sent are meant to kill one another, how would I... How would that little girl survive without my skills and power? I don't want her to be sent to die..." The voice responded promptly "I have already made arrangements for this. With my blessing, you will be virtually un-killable. As long as you have no intention of winning the game you are a part of, fate will conspire to keep you safe. On-top of that, you will be given the tools to avoid day to day danger, a form of knowing the future that will work well in tandem with the blessing. You will be able to live a carefree existence, both unaware of the dangers around you, as well as being, mostly, immune to them."
Emilia was unsure how much time had passed since either of them last spoke. She thought of the little girl she once was, and the life that the little girl thought she would someday have. Even if she did not deserve such a thing as a second chance, that little girl did. "Will you really be able to take away the events of my life?" The voice, for the first time, hesitated. "Not... exactly. Altering a soul like that would be an even larger crime then what was done to you. It would be tearing your very essence asunder. Your soul will always remember what you have done, what you desire, where you have been. It is the primal essence of your being, who you were, who you are, and who you want to become, it can never truly forget. Destroying or removing parts of your soul would be tandem to using pieces of you to create a new being all together." Emilia attempted to respond, to say that she did not want to remember, but the voice cut her off. "However, your new body will be designed to keep you ignorant of your past. You will be given powers that cause you amnesia, you will be created with a mind that can barely even conceive of using violence as a tool. You will only truly remember your past should you..." The voice paused a moment. "I cannot explicitly tell you the conditions, but it involves your name. You, and every other champion will be reduced to the first letter of your name, as long as you do not alter that, you shall never truly remember your past, not until you die again. The memories will still be within you however, and I cannot guarantee you will not remember them from time to time, but you should always be able to forget, and to forget you ever remembered."
She considered the being's words for a long, long time. In the end, she nodded to herself, she did not deserve a second chance, but the girl she once was deserved it, deserved to go outside, deserved to eat good food, deserved to play with animals. "I'll do it for her. I’ll go back for the person I was once upon a time. I hope that the person I am today never exists, I hope I find a way to erase this version of myself forever..." The voice was both proud and sad. The poor girl chose to keep going for the sake of her past self, despite her overwhelming desire to simply cease existing. "I wish you luck in this game of ours. I hope you will find what you never had in your old life." The God of Innocence crafted her new form, for her, he would bend the rules. There was no guilt in ignoring the rules of a game you were forced to play. He would be certain that this girl would live for as long as she desired. His only concern was that she would strengthen her soul though bonds, friendships, rivals, love, hate. The stronger one’s emotions, the stronger one’s soul becomes. Eventually, she would start to remember her old life, he only hoped she would be prepared for it when it happened. He hoped her soul would gain strength through friendship, so when the time came for her soul to remember, he hoped she would have the companions to help her through it.
